Keep Digging Holes in The Desert

"Vic, what's happened?"

I let him in and we sat down.

"She lied." Was all he said.
"About what?"
"She fucking cheated Valerie! She fucking cheated!"

He completely lost it and I pulled him into me.
I laid him down so his head was in my lap.
I played with his hair to calm him down.

"Vic, Im so incredibly sorry."
"Why? I'm the fucking idiot."

We sat in silence for a while just lost in our own thoughts.
I looked down and saw his eyes closed.

"I wish you knew how I felt about you... What's so wrong with me? An I not enough? Am I too much of a friend?" I whispered.

I sighed.

"I love you and you don't even know it." I whispered again.

Suddenly he turned and looked at me.
Shit.

"Val nothing is wrong with you. We just will never work out. You're like a sister to me."

Suddenly he got up and looked at me sympathetically.

"I'll text you later."

With that he left.
As soon as the door shut I broke down and curled up into a ball.
My heart broke even more just by hearing him reject me.
I stood up and ran to my room grabbing my blade that was still on the floor from when Vic threw it.
Thank god Jaime was out.
I pressed it to my arm taking a deep breath and dragged it across.
Instantly blood began gushing out.
I sighed in relief.
Once I finished I cleaned myself up and wrapped it in gauze.
I would only keep it on until the blood stopped.
I put a jacket on and went to bed too tired to take a shower.
I just wanted to hide away and die.
Nobody would care anyway.
Hell, Jaime is out every night trying to stay away from me..