Sullen Girl

His flesh was on mine, his hands harshly over my lips. I couldn’t breathe; I couldn’t think anything but my mind was screaming out help, I never felt so much pain before in my life. I could feel his teeth on me.

“Please.”

“I said shut the fuck up.” His voice was in between a growl and a moan, I was sobbing out in anguish as I felt the back of my head in pain then quickly my face was in pain causing me to scream.

I felt a slap across the face again as I woke up abruptly to see Mick on my chest and I saw his paw slapped against my face. I was cover in sweat and I hated that feeling, and I haven’t had a dream about that in two years. I looked at Mick as he titled his head to the side causing me to smile in relief.

“Hey, you hungry?” the look on his face was enough to confirm that yes, he was hungry. “What time is it?” I asked Mick though knowing he won’t know the answer I rolled over to my stomach and saw it was 9 am.

Shit I’m late. I thought jumping to my feet and running to get anything and everything done before I left to my first job. This would be my first late every, which just made me over think about how late I really was, and how much I just got the paid raise and they are going to take it away from me. As I was running out of my apartment into the snow that thankfully was shoveled out of the way to run to my job, hopefully without falling on some ice.

“Oh shit it’s open!” I grumbled to myself as I quickly opened the door causing anyone that was in there to look over at me.

“We just opened.” Amber one of the girls that normally work late shift which surprised me that she is here now she must have seen the surprised look on my face giving me a soft smile. “School’s closed and anyone who has children needed me to cover their shifts and is taking the late shift.”

“Wait.” I said softly as I always did. “You’re covering all of those shifts?” she shook her head at me before whipping down the counter.

“No, all the younger girls are coming in to cover their shifts which is badass cause I skipped out on some homework last night.” She said causing me to smile at her but I felt the instant bile in my throat, high school was not a great anything for me.

“Homework is ruthless.” I grumble as I started to put up my jacket but I heard the bell ring from someone coming in and I turn to see Lucas and I smiled over to him as he smiled back at me.

“I didn’t notice how much sleep I didn’t get.” He said sitting down on the chair right in front of me causing me to bite down on my bottom lip.

“I’m sorry.” I said softly as he shook his head over at me. “I didn’t know the drive was gonna be-“

“Liv, this was not your fault. I’ve been writing too much at night so.” He said as I still felt bad scrunching up my face causing him to laugh. “You look cute like that.”
I felt myself blush and I turn away from him, I did think Lucas was good looking man but he wouldn’t want to like me this way, he doesn’t really know what I’ve been through or how I am as a person so him saying I was cute was nice but I didn’t want him going out with me. He deserve better than me, and hell it’s not like anytime someone says you’re cute they wanna go out with you. He was just being nice.

Holy fuck I am over thinking this.

I came back from the back and Lucas still wasn’t served so I guess he was mine today, like normally. I quickly walked over to him with a hot black coffee. I poured it into his cup and he looked up over at me with a smile, as I sent him a small smile.

“Why is no one else serving you?” I asked as he shrugged his shoulders with a boyish smile. “Want the usual?” I asked as he nodded his head.

“You know me.” He said as I rolled my eyes at him. “Also the young girls don’t really do well…not to be rude.” He said as I raised an eyebrow over to him.

“That’s not nice but it’s true.” I mumbled as he smiled over at me.

“Sometimes the truth hurts, livy.”

“Aint that the truth.”

~~*~~

Lucas was about to leave giving me a nice tip like always but as soon as he got up someone came in, that same someone that I may or may not have a dream about. I felt myself slowly falling into my panic attack and I couldn’t hear what Lucas was saying to me.

“You know I always thought you were prettier than Anne.” He said pushing my hair back making me stare at him with wide eyes.

“Good for you but fuck off” I said shoving him away from me but the bathroom was still extremely small.

“Not a way a lady should talk.” He said grabbing my face and kissed me on the lips harshly and when I pulled away he slammed my head back into the mirror causing moan out in pain. “I knew you liked it rough.

When I woke up from my black out I was laying down on the couch in a strange house when I turn around I saw two big brown eyes staring at me causing me to scream and the dog run away while yelping. I felt the tears filled my eyes as I quickly wrapped my arms around myself but I noticed I was still in work clothes and I even had my jacket on though I still felt panic in my chest.

“Olivia relax it’s just me.” I heard the voice that usually brings a smile to my face and I turn quickly to see Lucas, he was walking over to me slowly as I try to calm down. “I’m sorry Liv, I couldn’t get into your house and I started to get looks.”

“It’s okay, Lucas.” I said softly as I looked down to his hand and it was swelled up. “What happened to your hand?” I asked getting up from the couch walking over to him as he looked down at his hand meekly.

“Oh. You know that fella…well.” He shrugged his shoulders as my eyes widen grabbing his hand gently but then I shot him a look. “Don’t give me that look, Olivia.” He said in a soft voice as I pursed my lips at him.

“Come on, let’s get some ice for your hand.” He sent me a smile but he quickly followed me before I looked over at him with a look of confusion.

“Keep going straight.” He said as I nodded my head and still led him through the kitchen causing him to laugh at me. “I have ice packages.”

I didn’t say anything as he sat down in a chair and I went to his freezer looking for ice. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable it was actually nice; it let me clear out my mind because I needed to. I could hear myself yelling at myself to leave and my heart is trying to reason with the brain but it doesn’t look like anyone is going to win this battle.

Lucas is a nice man but so was him so how can I move on with my life? I wasn’t too sure and now I was getting really uncomfortable being at Lucas’s house just alone with him. Christ I am stupid. As I grabbed the ice pack I noticed my hands were shaking. Why can’t I just get over things already? I sighed walking over to Lucas and even though he was and still is an extremely big man I noticed he try to make himself seem smaller and extremely relaxed which was hard to do but he did it. Which did take some edge off but I honestly felt my anxiety hand wrapped around my throat.

“Give me your hand.” I whispered and he looked up at me and sent a very friendly smile and I forced myself to smile back.

“You don’t have to Olivia.” He said softly as he went to grab the ice from my hands but I knew I had to try to get over this so I pulled the ice package away. “Okay.” He said slowly and his hand followed making me smile easily and I gently touched his hand and lay the ice pack on it. His hands were soft I just noticed, and they seem gentle. I put my hand onto of the ice holding it to his bruise hand.

“Why’d you hit him?” I asked even though I didn’t want to know the answer, he pursed his lips at me almost looking childish.

“I don’t like ‘em. He’s a tosser.” He said and I agreed but that doesn’t mean I like the idea of him knowing anything from that time.

“Lucas.” I warned as he sighed looking over to me. “You can’t just hit people.” Once again the childish look on his face causing me to smile over at him.

“I can’t promise you that Liv, but I’ll try harder next time.” He said as I nodded my head and that’s really only what I wanted.

Also because I don’t like the idea of him coming around often, I’ve already seen him two times in a week and I couldn’t handle it anymore. I don’t think my body could actually handle the idea of seeing him anymore, I’m sure I’ll have a heart attack by the end of the week, if not this month.

“Are you hungry?” He asked as bringing me thought of my thoughts as my hands were still on top of his, I felt my cheeks heat up.

“No.” Yes, you were but you won’t eat around him. He looked over at me with a perked eyebrow. “Seriously I am fine.”

“Olivia you’ve been out for more than two hours.” He said and I raised an eyebrow over to him. “You should eat something.”

“I’m fine.” I said as he sighed looking down at his massive dog that I just noticed came into the kitchen, it was a blue grey pit-bull if memory serves me right, and he was a beautiful dog. The dog put his head ontop of lucas’s leg and breathes heavily.

“This is Spartacus.” He said with a proud smile and I laughed over at him. “What? Didn’t know I was a history buff?” I shook my head at him as I released his hand now.

“No, I just think it’s a cute name.” I said softly looking at the dog and his eyes were wide and very puss in boots like. “Can I pet him?”

“Yeah he’s a friendly guy, he loves giving kisses so watch out.” He said as I smiled petting the dog head softly and he reacted so friendly, shoving his snot in my face and started licking the hell out of my face. “I told ya’. Come on Spartacus get off of her, let Olivia breath.” I just laughed petting the dog’s neck as Lucas pulled him off of me. “So, lunch?” He sent me a wide smile and I bite the inside of my cheek and nodded my head holding back a smile.

You’re such a pushover.