Believe in Me

“Taylor! I can’t believe you gave Cameron my address!” I yelled into the phone. I had just dropped off Landon at the airport, and I was finally back at my apartment. I had time to call Taylor and ask about the letter, so I did. Taylor loved it when Cameron and I were together. Her now ex-boyfriend, David, is Cameron’s best friend. I think she was more devastated about my break up than I was. Taylor giggled in the phone, “C’mon Lilly. He wrote me saying how much he still loves you and everything. I had to give it to him!”

I sighed. I’m over Cameron Sandoval. Done. Zip. Nada. It’s all over. “I don’t want him back. He’s in my past now, Taylor! I’m not interested in him anymore.” I told her. I could picture her laying in her bed, playing with her blonde hair, rolling her eyes at me. “You loved him so much, Lilly. How can you just give him up like that?” She asked me.

“Do you not understand!?” I shouted. I could feel my cheeks begin to burn. “He left me, Taylor! Out of the blue, he left! I’m 100% done with him.” I told her. She groaned. “You guys were perfect.”

“Yeah well we were. Past tense. Plus…I’m seeing someone else.” I finally blurted out. She gasped, then began to scream. All of Chicago could probably hear her through the phone.
“WHAT!? LILLY HOW COME YOU HAVEN’T TOLD ME!? WHO IS HE? WHAT DOES HE DO? SEND ME A PICTURE!” Taylor shouted. I sighed, I probably shouldn’t have told her. I love Taylor and all, but she has an opinion about everything , and she isn’t afraid to share it.

“He plays hockey.” I told her. “His name is Patrick.” Taylor groaned, “Eww, hockey? Does he have any teeth?” She asked. I chuckled, “Yes, Tay. He has teeth. Not all hockey players are missing teeth, ya know!?” Taylor paused for a moment. “That Kings player we met was missing teeth.” She said defensively. I sighed, she was so blonde sometimes. “That was Dustin Penner. One guy, Taylor. That doesn’t mean every player in the NHL is missing some.” I told her. “Okay, whatever! You need to spill! How did you meet? Is he good in bed?” She asked.

“He plays for the team I work for, so that’s how I met him. He was kind of an ass at first, but he made it up to me by taking me out. Now we’re dating…I guess.” I explained to her. Taylor didn’t say anything, but I could hear her moving around. I figured she was in her car or something.

“Is he good in bed?” Taylor asked again. I bit my lip. I was kind of nervous to tell Taylor the truth. “We haven’t…we haven’t done it yet.” I told her. She gasped, “What do you mean you haven't done it yet?” She asked me. I laid on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. “It’s only been a few weeks.” I explained. “We’re not rushing anything. We’re taking it slow.’

“Well then, that’s good.” Taylor told me sweetly. I expected her to make fun of me, maybe call me a goody-good or something. That’s how Taylor is. She sometimes expects everyone to be like her, even me, but I usually let her down. We’re two different people, but we match each other perfectly. I need someone like Taylor in my life, and she needs someone like me.

“I’m kinda nervous to.” I admitted. “To sleep with him. I mean, he’s known for being a partier, and I’m sure he’s had tons of partners in bed…I just don’t want him to think I’m bad, you know?” I explained to Taylor. I was glad to admit it to someone. The thought had been in the back of my mind since the first date. I’ve only slept with Cameron my whole life, and I was confident with him. Because it was…him.

“You’ll be fine.” Taylor told me. “You should be honest with him, though. Tell him you’ve only been with Cameron. If you’re not confident and 100% ready, then don’t do it yet, Lil.” She said. I looked around the room, taking in what she told me. I agreed with her, I really did. I started to question if I was even ready to sleep with Patrick. He hasn’t been pressuring me, so it’s not like I have to make a choice, but I know the time is coming. Patrick is 24, I’m 22. This isn’t a high school relationship. Most people our age sleep with each other already.

“I think I’m ready.” I said. “Well, I mean, I’m not gonna go up to him and be like 'Hey Patrick! I’m ready! Let’s hit the sheets!’ ya know? But when the time comes, I’m ready.” Taylor laughed in the phone, “Yeah, I get what you’re saying, Lilly. I wanna meet this guy! Does he have any hot single friends?”

“Come visit me! PleasePleasePleasePLEASE come visit!” I shrieked. Taylor began to respond, but I was interrupted by a knock on my front door. “Hold on.” I told her, and got up from the bed. I opened up, surprised to find Rachel standing there. “Hey.” She smiled. I motioned the door open, urging her to come in.

“Hey, Taylor. I’m gonna have to go. I have someone over.” I said into the phone. Rachel made her way onto my couch, and sat down as I hung up. “Rachel! What’s up?” I asked, walking toward her. She looked depressed and nervous. Her face usually was bright, full of life. Today she looked as if she’s done nothing but lay in bed. “Are you okay?”

“I need your advice.” She said simply. “I’m so confused and I don’t know what to do.” She told me. She looked like she was about to break down and cry. “Okay, Okay.” I told her. “I can help you. Why are you confused? What's going on?”

She sighed, staring down at her hands. “Recently, my ex-boyfriend has been contacting me. He wants me back.” She told me. “I loved him, but I don’t know if I still do.” I felt bad for her, I really did. She just looked so helpless. “You need to think long and hard about this then.” I said to her. She looked up at me like a puppy, listening to my orders. “Think about why it didn’t work out the first time. What if that happens again? Would it be worth it?”

“I’d have to quit if I go back with him.” She admitted. I looked at her confused, “Quit?” She sighed, looking away. “I can’t date him if I work as an Ice Girl.”

“Who’s him ? Why would you have to quit?” I asked. This whole story was beginning to not make sense. Why would she have to quit being an Ice Girl for some guy?

“It’s Jonathan!” She slightly yelled. “It’s Jonathan Toews!”
__________________________________________

“It’s been a week. You still gonna ignore me?” Patrick asked, sitting down next to Jonathan on the bus. They were heading to morning skate in Detroit, getting ready to play the Red Wings that night.

“I’m not ignoring you.” Jonathan said simply, staring out the window. Patrick chuckled. He knew Jonathan was still mad. Patrick personally didn’t think he did anything wrong except push Jonathan’s buttons. “I’m serious about what I said, Johnny. You say you liked Rachel, but you let her dump you for her shitty Ice Girl job. You should’ve stuck up for her.”

“I know, Kaner. I don’t need a life lesson from you. I know what I did wrong and I know how to handle it. Can you stop talking about it?” He asked harshly. Patrick rolled his eyes and got up, almost falling due to the rolling bus. He walked to the back and sat next to Andrew.

“He’s still butt hurt about it but he said he knows how to handle it.” Patrick told him. Andrew shrugged, “Guess you gotta let him. You know how Johnny is. Just don’t bring it up anymore.” He said to Patrick. Annoyed, Patrick put on his headphones, ignoring what else Andrew had to say.

He sat there with his head against the seat, listening to music. It was a strangely long ride from the hotel to the arena. Normally, the team stays right down the street from where they’re playing. Patrick unlocked his iPhone, checking his text messages. He had one from Lilly.

LILLY: Good morning :) Call me after the game, we need to talk. Good luck tonight xo

He was nervous about what she had to talk to him about, but he didn’t think twice about it. Lilly seemed fine in the text message, so it couldn’t be that big of a deal. He began to reply as soon as the bus stopped.

ME: Ok. Thanks, have a good day. :)

He wrote. “Who’s Lilly?” Patrick heard from behind. He looked back to see Patrick Sharp peering over his shoulder.

“That’s Kaners girlfriend.” Andrew chimed in. “You mean someone actually likes you? With that dog hair of yours?” Patrick joked.
“Shut up, Sharpie. She does like me, and I like her too. Gimme a break.” Patrick said, grabbing his things. He headed off the bus and into the arena with Patrick and Andrew. Jonathan walked ahead of them, not saying a word.
______________________________________

“Good morning.” Patrick smiled, holding a box of donuts and two coffees. I was guessing he’d just gotten back from Detroit, since he was wearing the same clothes he was in when we Skyped last night. I smiled, inviting him in.

“What a surprise.” I smiled. He pulled me in and kissed my forehead. “What are we doing these next three days? I have practice, but no games. I’m all yours.” He smiled. I bit my lip, looking at him deviously. “You’re all mine? I might have to take advantage of that.”

“I would kiss you right now, but Lilly…” He started, pointing to my shirt. “You’re wearing a Kings shirt.”

“Shit.” I said, blushing. “Didn’t realize I’d be seeing you so early…at least I wear it to bed and not out in public!” I defended. Patrick chuckled, taking a bite of a Strawberry donut. I smiled at him, and then took off my shirt, revealing my black lace bra. He pretty much choked after that, having to wash down his donut with coffee. I smiled flirtatiously, then walked to my bedroom. I quickly threw on a black V-neck, then headed back out to eat.

“That’s a tease.” Patrick whined, drinking his coffee. “Okay, seriously. What are we doing? Wanna go to a Bulls game?” He asked. I twisted my lips, thinking it over. “I’ve never been to an NBA game.” I admitted. “If you want to go, then let’s go.”

“I can get us court side seats. There’s a game tonight.” He told me, pulling out his cell phone. “Wanna go? I’ll call right now.” He asked. I nodded. A Basketball game seemed like it’d be fun…sort of. I kind of hate Basketball, it bores me, but I was willing to go to an NBA game. Patrick called someone and talked on the phone for a few minutes while I munched on a donut.

“Alright, looks like we’ll be court side tonight” He said, hanging up the phone.
_____________________________________________

“Damn, this is a close one!” Patrick shouted. There were two minutes left and the Bulls were in the lead, 92-87. I nodded, watching the huge men run by us.Damn, these guys are big, I thought throughout the game. The whole crowd was going insane and it was exciting to see.

The Bulls ended up winning 94-90, and the fans went insane. Security helped escort Patrick and I out of the arena. We were surrounded by people with cameras, asking Patrick for a photo. I felt sort of awkward walking behind him. I’d wondered what people were thinking. Patrick grabbed my hand and pulled me next to him as we exited the arena. Fans still followed, but most left. Security led us through the gate where the athlete’s park, and we got into Patrick’s car.

“That was fun.” I said, putting on my seatbelt. Patrick looked at me like he didn’t believe a word that came out of my mouth. “Did you really have fun?” He asked. I rolled my eyes and leaned over to kiss his cheek. “Yes. I really did.” I told him. “Honestly, it was a great time. Thank you for taking me.” I smiled.

We drove back to his apartment, where I agreed to stay for the night. “I’m kinda tired. I need a coffee or somethin’.” Patrick said as we entered the elevator. I could see it in his eyes that he was ready for bed, and I was tired myself.

We walked into his apartment and headed to the kitchen, where Patrick grabbed a Red Bull for himself and a Water for me.
“So, uh, the bed in the guest room needs another blanket, so I’ll get that for you in a sec.” He said, opening his energy drink. I let out a little laugh. “Guest room, eh?” I asked sarcastically. Patrick sighed, “Well, you know… I don’t want you to think I’m trying to press-”

“Patrick, I want to sleep with you.” I blurted out. There was an awkward silence as he threw me my water bottle, but a small smile formed on his face. “Okay then.” He told me, leading me to his bedroom. I changed into some Victoria’s Secret yoga shorts and a red tank top, then washed my face. I wasn’t embarrassed to show myself without makeup in front of Patrick. For God’s sake, he’s seen me at my worst already.

I walked out and found Patrick laying on his bed, wearing a Blackhawks tee and flannel pajama pants. He smiled when he saw me, and I laid next to him. “Geeze, your bed feels like a cloud.” I gushed. That thing was so soft! Patrick laughed, pulling me close. “Glad you like it.” He smiled, kissing my lips. He motioned on top of me, kissing my lips, then my cheek, then down to my neck.

“I’ve been wanting to do this.” Patrick murmured against my lips, wrapping one of my legs around his waist. He ripped off my tank top as I ran my hands against his abs, taking off his shirt. My breath caught in my throat when I saw him without his shirt. His body was incredible. He unhooked my bra, dragging it down my arms and throwing it on the floor.

Patrick moved me on top of him as he reached into a drawer next to the bed, pulling out what I thought it was. I pulled his pants off, kissing his lips as I did so. There I was, topless with nothing but my underwear on, and there he was…the same way. He pulled one out of the box, but didn’t put it on yet. He took his time kissing me all over.

“Are you ready?” He whispered, kissing my ear. I nodded my head.
He started to pull down his boxers, but we were interrupted by a knock on the door. He quickly pulled his underwear up, and groaned. “Hold on.”

I put my bra back on. First time didn't go as planned, I thought to myself. I tried to listen to Patrick, but I could barely hear him. I grabbed my shorts off the floor and pulled them on. I peeked my head out of his bedroom, and I could see a girl talking to him in the kitchen. We made eye contact, and she walked my way. Patrick pulled her hand back, trying to stop her, but she continued. “Hello.” The brunette smiled when she reached his room. I smiled back, trying to hide behind the door. I didn’t want her to see me in my bra, but I could tell she already knew.

“Lilly…” Patrick began. “Meet Jackie...my sister.”