My Dad, My World.

I was right, my bed was calling my name. My new bed sheets and conforter spread across my new beds length had my head swimming with things i could possibly dream about.
The days events had wiped me out and i was ready to hit the hay, even without dinner. But of course dad made a small dinner for the two of us and i had to admit, i was kinda hungry.
"Hey bug dinners ready. "Dad said. I laid my book down on my new night stand and followed dad to the kitchen. Pouring dad and i some drinks, i caught a picture out of the corner of my eye that had me and mom and dad on christmas. I had to be about 2 considering my puffy cheeks and still tiny hands. I wore some God awful christmas dress that was twice as big as i was. But mom....she looked gorgeous dressed simply in a short puffy red dress with green leaf berrets sporadically spread throughout her long dark hair. Dad, unusually dressed in a red sweater with a black dressshirt underneith and black slacks, stood behind my mom with his hands resting softly on her arms and partly on my stomache.
I looked at dad, his eyes looking desperately at his plate lol a prayer was to be said first and im sure he was plenty ready to say a short one before digging in.
Laying his drink in front of him and having a seat next to him,, i held out a hand and grasped it tightly in mine. We bowed out heads and dad slowly started his prayer speaking ever so softly.
"Lord, we ask you bless our eveningwith relaxation after a long day. I want to thank you for helping to make taylors birthday something she will always remember. God we ask u to bless this dinner and the people sitting around this table. In Jesus name we pray Amen"
"Amen." I repeated.
I looked back at the picture again after takking a bite of my foot and then turned to dad.
"Dad, what happened to mom." I asked. Dads eyes shot up to mine and i cringed at the immediate pain i saw flash inside them. The blue flecks in his bright eyes darkened as he looked down at his plate and finished what he was chewing and swallowed with difficulty.
"She uh......we went to dinner, it was our anniversary." He started. I put my fork down and slightly pushed away my plate so that i could focus on dad.
"She looked beautiful, u shoulda seen her." He smiled. "While we were there, this song came on the speakers. We knew right then and there that that was our song. So many years of being together already and not a single verse of lyrics could describe us....until this song that neither one of us had heard before....anyway, on our way home, this song. It uh...it came on the radio and i blasted the volume so loud that her and i were laughing to the point of crying. She had the best smile taylor,oh like u would never believe. I see it in yours when u laugh..." i smiled at my dad and the rims of his eyes got pink but his smile remained.
"And your hair....just like hers." He staired. "Dad..." i blushed.
"Sorry bug.......ok well, the radio was up, and....we didnt see a thing. It was a dark street because i decided to avoid traffic. Vegas is crazy you know that. But yea, this drunk driver had his headlights off...." he looked up at me and blinked, letting tears fall freely. I wanted to comfort him...but dad wasnt like that, he needed to finish, to get it off his chest.
"And um...well, he hit us...going about 85 .....he hit her side...." a small sob escaped his mouth and i scooted closer and grabbed his hand, my own eyes filling with tears.
"Um...it killed her on impact. I woke up about 20 minutes later, bloody and pretty mussed up. ...i tried to get her out, but the car was upside down, and there was...there was...."
He began to cry and so did i, i could picture it all, the violent hit, the speed, the rolling of the car, and the blood....all of the blood..... dads tears spilled uncontrolably now. I covered my mouth so that dad wouldnt see.
"I tried to but she was covered....and trapped, and broken in so many places.....and she, she wouldnt wake up." He sobbed on the last part and i sniffed to keep myself from doing the same.
"Im sorry taylor, i tried!i tried to save her, but i didnt know! Im sorry i didnt know she was already gone....." he let out a loud cry and i whimpered into his shojlder after pulling him in for a hug.
"Shhh daddy its ok...its ok..."
I pulled him from his chair and led him to his bedroom and layed him down and let him cry his heart out while i didnt the same, cleaning up dinner. No i had never really met mom. I was young, hadnt even started school yet. The only thing i had were memories of her singing to me goodnight.
I still missed her though, no matter how little i got to know her, she was still my mother and i did love her while i could.
I went back to dads room, dagging my feet as i went. I felt drained. I carried a cup of coffee for him in my hands and handed it to him as he sat up in his bed. I kissed his cheek and sat next to him.
"Thank you babybug.....tomarrow we will go see her together. "
He whispered. "Ok. " i responded.
"I have something for you bug." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a black box and handed it to me.
I opened it and in sat a delicate gold chain and a small golden leaf pendant dangled lightly in the middle.
"It was ur moms....i found it and had it cleaned. " he said. I looked up at him and let more tears fall.
"Happy birthday babybug."