The Most Unexpected Faces

ANDY’S POV

~

I decided the best time to talk to Ashley would be when we were alone and in the comfort of our own bus living room. This was why when all the others went out after our show for a drink, I stayed behind, knowing that Ashley would too.

Since we got together, he’d really cut back on the partying – something I thought he’d only do when he was dead and buried. He took our relationship seriously though and didn’t find dancing around drunkenly with people in a club fair to me, something I was grateful for. He was losing his womanizer image but he actually didn’t seem to care, so, hopefully, he wouldn’t care if I revealed to the world our relationship. Sure, we may get some hate, but any true fans would stick by us for the music. Still, I decided it was only fair to give him a little warning, if not, the surprise may have the show ending badly and leaving me broken hearted, I needed to be sure this would work before I put us out there to the world.

When I found Ashley (not really hard on a bus, check the bathroom, bunks, kitchen and front room and you’re basically done) he was sat on the sofa in his Hello Kitty onsie, gazing at the TV with a bored expression that showed he wasn’t really that interested in the show.

“Hey, Ashes” I greeted quietly, perching on the couch next to him and attempting to look somewhat calm and collected.

“Andy” he mumbled in acknowledgement before focusing on the TV with new concentration so strong it was obviously false.

“Ashley… Stop pretending to watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition and look at me. I know things haven’t exactly been great between us lately, but I just want to talk to you” I sighed quietly as his gaze remained on the screen for a few more seconds while he contemplated my words before turning to face me.

“Okay then” his short answers weren’t what I was hoping for but it was better than him saying the sentences with anger and infinitely better than when he wasn’t speaking to me at all.

“Ashy… I love you, okay? But you want me to prove that and I’m happy to. Honestly, you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me and I’m going to fight for what we have. Still, I think it’s only fair to give you some idea of what I’m thinking, after all, I really don’t want to muck this up. Simply put, I’m not only going to show you that I love you, but I’m going to show the world. On stage tomorrow night seems a pretty good way to do that” Ashley’s eyes visibly widened as I spoke, like he wasn’t expecting me to say that. Then his lips slowly curved into a frown and my stomach dropped; this was not the reaction I’d wanted/expected/hoped for.

“Um, that’s sweet, Andy, but I can already think of several problems with that. First off, if fans react badly and get out of hand, then the concert could be ruined and not to mention create a shit storm of new hate and problems. Second, that’s sweet that you want to tell the world you like me, but what if what’s going on with us right now is never fully fixed and we break up? Then all that would have happened is that the bi and gay guys in our fan base would know they have a shot. If anything, it’s just more people that will throw themselves at you and more possibility that you’ll go off with one of them. It’s just screaming for trouble. I mean, for all I know, you could say this and we could be all happy but then when you get bored of me you’ll just have even more people to replace me with. I know I sound pessimistic and like my reasoning doesn’t make complete sense but, to me, it does and I don’t think it’s a great idea. I get that you love me, Andy, but you love a lot of peope . It’s not about knowing you love me, it’s about knowing that when it comes to romance, you ONLY love me. I guess you could call my thinking irrational but – and I’ll admit it – I’m really scared I’ll lose you. I’ve never had to worry about losing people I’m with to others because everyone’s always seen me as ‘desirable’ and ‘perfect’ but now I’m with you, someone even better than me who could have anyone he wants. Honestly? I’ll admit to being paranoid, scared, jealous and protective. Know why? When it boils down to it, it’s because I love you and though I believe you, my mind won’t rest until I’m sure you’re only mine… I’m sorry I’m this way, but I can’t help it. I’m just hoping that you think I’m worth sticking by, because I know most people would walk out right now, I just really hope you aren’t one of those people” he finished.

Ashley Purdy doesn’t cry. Simple. Right then though, tears were spilling over his perfectly eyeliner-ed eyelids and down his cheeks.

Instincts kicked in and I held him in my arms, kissing the top of his head and rubbing his back in what I hoped was a comforting way. When we did pull away, the look we shared was like a connection and no words were needed. It was simply his beautiful brown eyes gazing into my blue ones.

One thing I knew for sure, I needed to kick this up a notch. Announcing our relationship wouldn’t be enough, but I had a plan that was a little crazy, maybe a little bit un-thought through but that I was sure could work.

Looks like I’ve got things to do before the day after tomorrow – our day off and the perfect time for me to put this plan into action.