Sequel: If Not For You ›
Status: Being cleaned up--currently on chapter 2
Secrets And Lies
Stupid Song Lyrics
Ryan's POV
Brendon was going to Audrey's place, and Jon and Spencer went out on the town, they said they "wanted" me to come along, but I could see they wanted it to be just the two of them. So I told them I wanted to stay home and just hang out. So they left. And I'm lying on my bed, listening to my iPod. I have it on shuffle, just playing random songs. "When I'm With You" by Simple Plan comes up. I listen to the lyrics-
"I'm taking my time. I'm trying to leave the memories of you behind. I'm gonna be fine as soon as I get your picture right out of my mind. I wanna feel the way you make me feel when I'm with you. I want to be the only hand you need to hold on to. But every time I call you don't have time. I guess I'll never get to call you mine."
I can't listen anymore. That's the way I felt about Brendon....god how that boy could drive me to the point where everything I do reminds me of him! I hit the next button. "When You're Gone" by Avril Lavigne (yes, Avril, don't make fun of me).
"I always needed time on my own. I never thought I'd need you there when I cried. And the days feel like years when I'm alone. And the bed where you lie is made up on your side. When you walk away I count the steps that you take. Do you see how much I need you right now? When you're gone the pieces of my heart are missing you. When you're gone the face I came to know is missing, too. When you're gone all the words I need to hear to always get me through the day, and make it okay. I miss you. I've never felt this way before. Everything that I do reminds me of you"
Okay, hit skip. That was kinda scary. "Flavor of the Weak" by American Hi-Fi, this should be okay.
"She paints her nails and she don't know he's got her best friend on the phone. She'll wash her hair, his dirty clothes are all he gives to her. He's got pictures on the walls of all the girls he's loved before and he means everything to her. Her boyfriend he don't know anything about her. He's too stoned. Nintendo. I wish that I could make her see. She's just the flavor of the weak."
Too close. Switch the genders and there you go. No. Skip. "Teardrops on my Guitar"-Taylor Swift. Who put Country on my iPod? Oh, yea, that was me. She's a pretty good singer.
"Drew looks at me. I fake a smile so he won't see what I want and I'm needing everything that we should be. I bet she's beautiful-that girl he talks about. And she's got everything that I have to live without. Drew talks to me. I laugh 'cause it's so damn funny. And I can't even see anyone when he's with me. He says he's so in love. He's finally got it right. I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night. He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar. The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star. He's the song in the car I keep singing to. Don't know why I do."
SKIP SKIP SKIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God, don't I have any songs on my iPod that DON'T remind me of him???
"I Don't Love You" by My Chemical Romance starts to play. Okay. Whatever.
I shut off my iPod, and lean back on my bed. I can't get that boy out of my mind. I had to face the facts. I was in love with my best friend, who had a girlfriend, and who was probably straight. But I couldn't help thinking about the want I could almost taste in his lips so long ago, at that concert........
I hear the door crash open and shut, and someone crying. I'd know that person anywhere. I run out to the door to see the love of my life, only he didn't know it Brendon crying his eyes out for some strange, odd, unknown yet to me reason. But I had a pretty good idea it had something to do with his slut for a girlfriend Audrey. And, sure enough, it did.
Half an hour and two Kleenex boxes later, I get the whole story out of Brendon, and I even get him feeling a little bit better. Shit, what do I mean by a little bit? We were laughing so hard after a while that we couldn't even look at each other without cracking up, I actually felt happy, and the only thing I had to concentrate on was not leaning in to kiss him when he was trying not to laugh.
Brendon was going to Audrey's place, and Jon and Spencer went out on the town, they said they "wanted" me to come along, but I could see they wanted it to be just the two of them. So I told them I wanted to stay home and just hang out. So they left. And I'm lying on my bed, listening to my iPod. I have it on shuffle, just playing random songs. "When I'm With You" by Simple Plan comes up. I listen to the lyrics-
"I'm taking my time. I'm trying to leave the memories of you behind. I'm gonna be fine as soon as I get your picture right out of my mind. I wanna feel the way you make me feel when I'm with you. I want to be the only hand you need to hold on to. But every time I call you don't have time. I guess I'll never get to call you mine."
I can't listen anymore. That's the way I felt about Brendon....god how that boy could drive me to the point where everything I do reminds me of him! I hit the next button. "When You're Gone" by Avril Lavigne (yes, Avril, don't make fun of me).
"I always needed time on my own. I never thought I'd need you there when I cried. And the days feel like years when I'm alone. And the bed where you lie is made up on your side. When you walk away I count the steps that you take. Do you see how much I need you right now? When you're gone the pieces of my heart are missing you. When you're gone the face I came to know is missing, too. When you're gone all the words I need to hear to always get me through the day, and make it okay. I miss you. I've never felt this way before. Everything that I do reminds me of you"
Okay, hit skip. That was kinda scary. "Flavor of the Weak" by American Hi-Fi, this should be okay.
"She paints her nails and she don't know he's got her best friend on the phone. She'll wash her hair, his dirty clothes are all he gives to her. He's got pictures on the walls of all the girls he's loved before and he means everything to her. Her boyfriend he don't know anything about her. He's too stoned. Nintendo. I wish that I could make her see. She's just the flavor of the weak."
Too close. Switch the genders and there you go. No. Skip. "Teardrops on my Guitar"-Taylor Swift. Who put Country on my iPod? Oh, yea, that was me. She's a pretty good singer.
"Drew looks at me. I fake a smile so he won't see what I want and I'm needing everything that we should be. I bet she's beautiful-that girl he talks about. And she's got everything that I have to live without. Drew talks to me. I laugh 'cause it's so damn funny. And I can't even see anyone when he's with me. He says he's so in love. He's finally got it right. I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night. He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar. The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star. He's the song in the car I keep singing to. Don't know why I do."
SKIP SKIP SKIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God, don't I have any songs on my iPod that DON'T remind me of him???
"I Don't Love You" by My Chemical Romance starts to play. Okay. Whatever.
I shut off my iPod, and lean back on my bed. I can't get that boy out of my mind. I had to face the facts. I was in love with my best friend, who had a girlfriend, and who was probably straight. But I couldn't help thinking about the want I could almost taste in his lips so long ago, at that concert........
I hear the door crash open and shut, and someone crying. I'd know that person anywhere. I run out to the door to see the love of my life, only he didn't know it Brendon crying his eyes out for some strange, odd, unknown yet to me reason. But I had a pretty good idea it had something to do with his slut for a girlfriend Audrey. And, sure enough, it did.
Half an hour and two Kleenex boxes later, I get the whole story out of Brendon, and I even get him feeling a little bit better. Shit, what do I mean by a little bit? We were laughing so hard after a while that we couldn't even look at each other without cracking up, I actually felt happy, and the only thing I had to concentrate on was not leaning in to kiss him when he was trying not to laugh.