Caged Birds Don't Like to Sing

I woke up the following morning to a small creaking noise. I was between my disheveled sheets and still in a tight position; my hands tucked tightly under the pillow and my legs bent up to my stomach. I barely peered up from my pillow to see Jackson walking in, he kicked the door lightly so it’d close behind him. He held a tray in his hands.

I sulked as I secretly watched him move across the room and sit at the end of my bed. Wordlessly, he came near. I curled my legs up higher to get farther away and closed my eyes again. His hand touched the side of my hip and patted it softly. I didn’t move.

“Can’t you at least look at me?” he said in a disheartened voice after he took his hand back.

“No,” I demurred in response, my head still lay in the pillow.

I felt him set something down. I heard some clanging of silverware and plates. “I made you something.”

I grunted and pulled the covers up to hide all of me. “Get out.”

“Come on,” he plead, almost begging for some kind of actual response. I didn’t say anything like he had hoped I would. I looked through a small opening under my blankets. I watched him exit the room after a few more seconds of a tense silence. As he left, he sighed, “At least eat a little bit.” He shut the door behind him slowly with the same noise as before.

After I knew he was gone, I peered up. The tray held a plate of freshly made pancakes, eggs, and bacon. I sat up and pulled in onto my lap. Next to it was a glass of orange juice and a piece of paper that was folded in half. I picked it up and opened it. In some scribble-y handwriting. It read:

I’m sorry for hurting like that. It really isn’t how it seems. I guess at first it was, but not anymore. I promise. I will never do anything to disrespect you again. Come find me when you’re ready.

I didn’t think too much of it and went to place the note back down. What I failed to notice the first time was the small stack of dollar bills under it. I lifted it up and noticed that it was the exact amount his father had gave him. I smiled softly and briefly, feeling a warm tingling inside. It really did show that he didn’t want to accept the money. He was giving it to me. On the same note, I didn’t want it either. Money never was that important to me. It just reminded me more of my sick parents. But it was the thought that counts. And right now my thoughts are saying that I might have been too tough on him. I sighed. I hated when the guilt set in.

I took a few bites of everything to try to ease the nerves of going to see him. It helped a little bit, but once it was time to actually go downstairs, the clenching feeling in my stomach came back like always. I took a sip of the orange juice and walked out of my room and down the steps.

I found Jackson sitting on the couch. He was playing with his fingers and seemed to be deep in thought. I silently took steps closer to him and walked around the couch. I noticed his eyes as they looked up at me. I quickly lifted one half of my lips into a small smile, but nothing more.

“I’m so sorry,” he apologized quickly, trying to get the words out before I could debate him, he was about to stand up. I hesitated, but took his hand and lead him back down to sit beside me.

This whole situation would be more painless and less antagonizing if I just sucked it up. Even if it the whole thing still did bother me. Which it did, just not as much anymore. All of his apologizing seemed pointless at this time anyway. I got it the first time. It did help a bit, but it still didn’t ease much pain.

“It’s.... Okay,” I forgave in a quiet voice. I stared up into his sad eyes. I hardened my voice a little more this time, “Just at least tell me when I ask, okay? Or just don’t do anything stupid like this again.”

He shook his head willingly. “I won’t. I promise.” He held onto my hands a little tighter and pulled me in so he could peck my forehead. I closed my eyes as he did so and took a small, relieved breath.

Before he could pull away, I nuzzled my head on his chest. He rubbed over the back of my head and neck lightly. Getting rid of the last of the lowering tension in the ambiance, Jackson said airily, “Since you like me again now, can I start to harass you again?”

I poked his stomach and he made a small yelp and grabbed the area to block it. “Baby,” I teased and sat up on my knees. After a short minute, I added on, “It wouldn’t be the same if you didn’t.”

He grinned at that and tucked me under his arm. I went along with it and snuggled in.

“What’s in store for the rest of the day?” I asked.

Jackson contently answered with, “This.” His cheek laid itself on the top of my head. This time I didn’t feel as claustrophobic. It just made me feel happier to have him back close to me. He started kissing my cheek and made his way to my jaw, then all the way to my collarbone and neck. I felt my head cock back as he tenderly kissed my skin. He soon went back and pecked my lips briefly. After that we sat in some silence.

Minutes had passed before I finally said something about the elephant in the room. “I don’t want the money.”

He tilted his head down to look at me. “Neither do I if it makes you upset.”

“Then what do we do with it?”

He shrugged indifferently. “Give it to Rob,” he laughed.

“Oh no. He’s not coming back here, is he?” I asked in distress. I got up and looked Jackson in the face.

“Uh,” he stammered, scratching the top of his head. “Yeah....”

“See? I forgive you and you do this,” I groaned, pushing back up from him. He rolled his green eyes and pulled me back in. This time he placed his lips on my neck and kissed as I sat across his lap.

When he pulled away, he said, “It will be just fine. I told him not to drink this time.”

“Will he obey that rule?” He shrugged again. I punched him lightly in the arm. “Thanks. I’m going to get felt up in the night again.”

“He won’t spend the night,” he stated.

“That better not be a lie, Mr. Rathbone.”

“I promise he won’t.”

He tried to pull me in even closer for a kiss, but I turned my face and pulled back. He ended up pecking the air. When he opened his eyes, he looked at me in a peculiar way.

“Nope,” I said, hopping off him.“No way, buddy-boy.”

“But you’re so pretty,” he cooed, taking my hand. I slid it away from him and strode over to the stairs and jogged up them.

It surprised me when he didn’t follow me. But it did give me time to at least get dressed and things of that manner. Rob was going to be on and I wanted to be prepared. That meant as many layers of clothing as possible.

I first went into the bathroom. I noticed something different. A new shower was in there in place of the messed up tub. I walked around a bit and inspected it. It was regular, standing shower with a glass window protecting it. Shame, I liked taking baths. But it was still better than not bathing regularly with a broken tub and all. I guess a lot did happen yesterday since I was practically gone the whole day.

I turned the knob in the shower and fetched some towels as it warmed up. I placed them on the toilet seat so they were easily reachable. I slid off my pajamas and opened the glass to get in. The warm water ran down my aching muscles and it felt fantastic. The last of the outdoors was off of me finally.

Running my fingers through my wet hair, I just let the water envelop me. I needed a peaceful and mesmerizing time to myself. This fit the criteria perfectly. All the shampoos and soaps were lined up neatly on the ledge in the shower. Everything was set up nicely. If only the rest of this house was like this.

When I was out of the shower, I tied the towel around my body and wrapped my hair in the other. I proceeded to wipe the fog from the mirror, but it didn’t help much. So I skipped the makeup step and just got dressed and brushed my teeth.

I skipped down the steps and into the kitchen. “I’m back,” I said frivolously and crawled up on one of the counters.

“Rob’s going to be here any minute. Just as a heads up,” Jackson said turning around from the sink and rubbing his hands with a towel.

I peered around. “You did the dishes?” I assumed in an aghast voice.

“Yeah.” he set the towel on the counter. “I did cook, so I just did the rest of the dishes along with the pans.”

“Good work.”

He trailed his fingers along the counter as he walked closer to me. Once he was behind me, his fingers then trailer up my arm as his face came around on the side of mine.

“Good enough for a kiss?” he hummed as his lip barely ran across my neck.

I moved my face back. “Nope.” He groaned and walked back into the living room. I laughed to myself.

I started to get a little hungry again. I walked over to the freezer and pulled out the dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets I made Jackson get. And arranged a few on the nuggets around on the plate. As I opened the microwave, placed the paper plate in, then closed it, I could barely see my reflection. But I saw enough. How didn’t I see it in the mirror upstairs?

“Jackson!”

“What did I do this time?” he called from the family room.

I ran over to him and pointed at my throat. “Was this on purpose?”

He stood up and came closer, trying to get a better look. He tried to hide his laughter, but failed. “No, I wouldn’t of done it on purpose while you were still a little mad at me!”

I frowned. He laughed again, “It’s just a hickey. It will go away in a few days.”

“Days? I scoffed. “It’s embarrassing when I have to go out. It makes me look like a tramp.”

He rolled his eyes. “It doesn’t make you a tramp if your fiancé gave it to you. And when do you even go out?”

“Still,” I muttered as I went back to get my chicken nuggets after the microwave had beeped.

As I walked to the counter, I grabbed the ketchup and squirted it onto my plate. I scooted the plate along the counter in front of my seat and hopped into a chair. Right before I could place the first one in my mouth, Jackson called again from the living room, “Hey, look-ee here. I have a mark, too.”

“From what?” I walked over in the family room, unamused, with the chicken nugget in my hand. I forgot to set it down. When I reached Jackson, he had one hand holding up his shirt and the other pointing out some mark.

“You incesstant poking,” he faux pouted. I looked at the invisible mark. Jackson used his index finger and thumb to move my head in the correct direction. But right after, his fingers poked my hickey. He skittered away, laughing. I scowled loudly and whipped my chicken nugget at him. It hit the front of his shirt.

He stopped in his tracks, looked down. “It had ketchup on it,” he groaned.

I wickedly said, “I know.”

After I had him stopped for a second, I chased after him. He jumped over the back of the couch and landed on the cushions. I followed and landed on him. I took one of the pillows from behind me and hit him over the head multiple times with it.

“I surrender, I surrender!” he chuckled, now blocking his face with his hands.

“What’s going on here?” someone said as I heard the front door close. I looked up and Jackson sat up to look as well. Robert was standing at the door. I tossed the pillow behind me.

“She was attacking me,” Jackson complained through his laughter. I glared at him.

“Yeah, look what he did,” I said, turning my head and pointing to my neck dramatically.

Jackson scoffed. “It wasn’t on purpose. Not like this was!” He pointed at the red stain on the front of his shirt.

“You deserved it,” I attested.

“Simmer down, simmer down,” Robert said. He just witnessed our little, back and forth, bickering fit. He started walking over, slightly amused.

I crawled off of Jackson and sat at the other side of the couch. Jackson leaned up and both of us looked at Rob. Robert looked at me, confused. “I thought you were gone?”

I shot Jackson another look. He made a ‘ahem’ noise and stared at Robert. Rob made small, “Oh,” Then looked down. “I’m sorry I molested you that night.”

Jackson face palmed. He seethingly muttered, “Those weren’t the best words you could have used, Rob. Were they?”

Robert laughed. “It’s fine, Rob,” I forgave enthusiastically. I couldn’t just leave him hanging.

“Good,” he said clasping his hands together. “Got anything to eat, Jay?”

Jackson smiled wryly at me, then indifferently spoke to Rob, “Chicken nuggets are in the kitchen.”

Before I had a chance to say anything, Rob said, “Good, thanks.” And walked off to eat.

I grumbled at Jackson. “You’re a loser.”

He smiled and mocked me from earlier, “You deserved it.”