Let The Walls Break Down

I had stayed at Alex’s until 9PM on Monday, just hanging out with him. I went to see him again on Wednesday, and we arranged for him to pick me up at 7 on Friday. My parents were thrilled that I had made a friend and was going to a party, and they had been treating me extra nicely lately.
On Friday night, I stood looking in the mirror, trying to decide if I looked okay. My sister was older and at college now, so she wasn’t here to help me decide what to wear for such an occasion. My brother Joe was at college too, so he couldn’t give me any party tips, I was on my own. I straightened my red button down, fixing the sleeves so that they were rolled up halfway. I was wearing black skinny jeans and my hair spiked up- hopefully I looked decent enough to go out in public. I stared at myself a second longer, but a knock at the door alerted me that Alex was here. I raced down the stairs, but my mom had already opened the door. I heard her introducing herself, and then she turned to call me and saw that I was already there. “Mom !” I signed. “He’s cute !” She signed back, smiling goofily. I hugged her and rushed Alex out the door. “She seems nice,” He commented, stepping into the car. I shrugged, moms were moms.

I didn’t bring my board with me for obvious reasons, so it was a little harder to communicate. Alex smirked at me, “You look nice.” I held a thumbs up for lack of any other way to say thanks, and motioned toward him as well, indicating he looked good too. And damn, did he look good. He was wearing black jeans like me with a black leather jacket, and a gray t-shirt underneath. A gray scarf completed the look, and I envied how put-together yet effortless his outfit seemed. It wasn’t long before we pulled up to a large house on the corner, about ten minutes away from my house and five from Alex’s. It was only a little past seven, but the party appeared to be in full swing. Cars lined the street, and people spilled out of the house onto the lawn, red solo cups in hand. Alex weaved his way inside, saying hi to a few people here and there. I got a few curious stares, but I was focused on Alex. I watched at least five girls check him out on the way in the door. It was then that I realized that he was probably popular- so since I hung out with him, did that make me popular too ? Probably not once they found out I didn’t talk. Alex halted suddenly, so I did too. We were in a kitchen, which was big and open and looked out on the living room. The house was huge and perfect for a party, like the ones you see in teenage movies. There was a small crowd of equally attractive people- four guys and one girl. Alex hugged the guy with the buzz cut, and introduced him to me as “his best friend Rian.” The girl on his arm was his girlfriend, Cassadee, and then there was Josh, Zack, and Beau. All were unusually good-looking, and I felt very out of place. I waved tentatively to them, looking to Alex. “This is my good friend Jack, he just moved here at the beginning of the summer. He’s cool, trust me. He uh, doesn’t talk though.” Josh spoke up with an accent, “At all ?” I shook my head. Alex placed a hand on my shoulder, “Nope, but you gotta respect that dude.” Everyone shrugged and nodded, and we were past the initial weirdness. Alex smiled to me and moved around the island counter that was doubling as a bar. He pulled out two red cups, “What are you having Jack ?” He motioned me over and I gestured to a can of Bud Light that I probably wouldn’t drink. “You know, I think there’s a keg somewhere around here, let’s go find it.” He abandoned my can and grabbed the cups, handing one to me. I trailed behind him once again, squeezing through the mass of people. The keg was in the backyard, and I filled my glass up like I watched Alex do. He leaned against the stone wall that surrounded the yard, “What do you think, Jackalope ?” I smiled and gave a thumbs up again. He took a big swig of his beer, then started walking again.

It was around nine o’clock now, and the house was thumping with the music that was blasting downstairs. I was sitting in a large crowd of people on the floor, leaning against the railing overlooking the front room. Alex was next to me, followed by everyone I had met right after arriving. More people joined our circle, and at first I didn’t understand what was going on. Why were they passing around a cigarette ? Alex had plenty. And what’s that smell….It took me a minute to realize that they were smoking marijuana.

When the joint was two people away, I started to panic. My parents were going to kill me already, surely they would smell the beer on my breath. But weed ? I watched with wide eyes as Alex took a hit off it, inhaling lazily. If he did it, it must be okay, right ? He handed it to me, and I stared for a second. Everyone watched me closely, and something told me to take the joint. I grabbed it from Alex and took a hit like I’d seen him do. I passed it to Josh next to me, and Alex clapped me on the back. “See ? I told you he was cool.” He announced. I felt sort of proud that I had done the right thing, and I was suddenly glad that Alex had taught me how to smoke before. He stood and pulled me up with him, “Who wants to go get drunk ?” Everyone stood up and cheered, and we rushed downstairs.
I knocked back the rest of my beer, only my first one of the night. Still, I felt loose and actually normal for once. Alex was well on his way to getting drunk, but I wasn’t sure whether I wanted to drink that much or not. I was worried about accidently talking, and what I might say. Josh tossed me another can, and I cracked it open and took a sip. A small Mexican boy stumbled up, obviously drunk. “’Eyy, amigos !” He crashed to the ground at Rian’s feet, laughing. “Hey Vic.” Zack said, picking him up off the ground. I laughed along with everyone else. “Did you just laugh ?” Alex questioned. I nodded. “I didn’t know you could laugh !” I laughed again, he looked so surprised. He never took his eyes off me as he put his beer can in the middle of our circle- “Let’s make a toast. To Jack !” “To Jack !” Everyone echoed, and pounded their drinks. I did the same, undeniably happy.

At 10:30, I was considerably more buzzed. Alex was drunk, but he looked at me and said “Ask your mom if you can spend the night at my place, and then we can stay at the party all night.” I texted my mom and asked, knowing she would say yes. She was just happy that I was making friends. We were all seated on the trampoline at this point, laying drunkenly all over one another. Alex had his head on my shoulder, but I told myself it was just the alcohol. His head dropped into my lap, and he started giggling uncontrollably.

Just the alcohol.