Just Want Out

It was after a few hours, that Oli finally came back into the room. Not that I was too happy about it. I had been lying in his bed, sheets wrapped around me waiting for sleep to pull me under. Despite how exhausted I felt, I just couldn’t sleep. I was convinced that it was my nerves or fear keeping me on edge and aware of everything around me. When the bedroom door opened, I kept my body still as a dead body, and kept my eyes shut tight.

He lifted the covers on the other side of the bed, and snuck under them. I could feel the bed dip as he made himself comfortable. He wrapped his arms around my waist, making me jump a mile high. “Oh, so you are awake?” He asked. I could almost tell that he had a smirk on his face. Instead of replying, I took a deep breath as if to calm down and relax again. Once regaining composure I again tried to find sleep. It was useless of course, but worth a shot.

We stayed silent for a short while. I guess it was supposed to be a calming relaxing silence, but it made me feel like the walls were closing in on me. Oliver's arms tightened slightly around my waist, as he leaned over and whispered "welcome home." Into my ear causing me to shudder. Soon after that, I could hear his light snores. I could feel his breath on the back of my neck each time he breathed in and out.

I took the alone time, do to some thinking. I was still extremely confused and had so many questions. The only thing that I was 100% sure of was that Oli-- or the whole band-- had taken me from my home. I didn't know where I was, where I am going, and I don't know how to get home. I didn't know if I'd be able to go home anytime soon. Who knows when I would have a chance to get away? The biggest question I had however, was why me?

I wasn't anything special and I knew that. I was just a normal average girl. I wasn't outgoing, I wasn't a partier, I wasn't one to have much fun. I was boring for the most part. I didn't drink, I didn't do any drugs, I didn't smoke, hell I didn't even have sex. Why would a bunch of guys want to kidnap me when surely there were a lot of other girls they could have their fun and ways with. Hell. I wasn't even normal. Normal people didn't hate themselves, didn't cut themselves, didn't issues with how their bodies looked. I was so on the fucked up side I could even think why they would have picked me. Maybe they didn't know? I could easily be just the first girl who they saw and acted on instinct? But somehow that didn't seem realist to me.

With all the thinking I was doing, my mind grew exhausted. I finally closed my eyes, shifted my body as far away from Oli as I could with his arms still around me, and drifted off into a slumber.

--

When I woke up the next morning, I was alone in the bed. I wondered where Oli was, but didn't think too much of it. The more time he spent away from me the better. I sat up with my back against the headboard and sighed. Since I had gotten here, they weren't treating me all too badly. When i think of getting kidnapped, my mind pictures being handcuffed and tied up. Being beaten and locked away in a basement. Granted I had been in the basement earlier but that was after I had thrown a fit. It didn't add up right to me. Of course, I wasn't complaining. I would much rather take this than the average kidnapping story you always see.

I sighed again, before getting out of the bed. I shivered slightly my warm bare legs hitting the cold air. Biting my lip I thought about leaving the room and venturing off, but the little voice in the back of my head told me to stay where I was. But the room was far too quiet and lonely so I went against my better judgment.

I tiptoed to the door and turned the handle carefully before slipping out of the room. I only knew how to get to the stairs, and that was only because of last night when Oli had brought me to the room. I softly made my way down the steps trying not to make myself too known. When I reached the landed I looked around curiously and took a left which led me to the room we were all in last night. I kept walking forward and could see the kitchen, which was occupied by three other people. I sucked in my breath as my mind screamed for me to go back into Olis room but I felt as if I could only walk forward.

Inside the kitchen were Jordan, Lee and Matt N. I walked through the threshold to enter the kitchen and it seemed to get awfully quiet, making me feel self-conscious. Biting my lip I looked down standing close to the entry ready to walk out.

"Am I not allowed down here?" I inquired still not looking up. I noticed that the tile floor of the kitchen could use a mopping.

"Did Oli say you could leave the room?" Jordan asked, I wasn't looking but I'm sure he raised an eyebrow at me.

"He wasn't there when I woke up." I muttered, as I let my hair fall in front of my face, hiding it.

"I don't think it's a good idea to-" Jordan started but was interrupted by Matt.

"Fish, shut up. ‘Course it's fine. You hungry?" He asked his voice warm and nice.

I shook my head as a way to tell him I didn't want food. I just didn't think I could eat right now. "Can I just have water?" I said politely, afraid of them. Matt nodded his head, opening the fridge and getting a water bottle. He handed me it with a small smile and I thanked him. I stood there awkwardly before twisting the cap off and taking a sip. It was refreshing, having the cool liquid slide down my throat.

"Have you talked to him yet?" Matt asked taking a seat on a small stool that was in front of the kitchens island. I shook my head.

"N-not really. We exchanged a few words last night." I mentally punched myself in the face for stuttering. That wasn't really helping my whole 'try to act tough; stand your ground' facade I was going for. Matt nodded, and an awkward silence fell over us.

"This is fucking ridiculous." Jordan muttered, walking out of the kitchen while rolling his eyes. I scratched the back of my neck not sure what to say.

"Don't mind him." Lee said, turning away from the stove where he was making food. "He can be a bit cranky."

I bit my lip stopping myself from saying anything that would get them mad. Matt sipped at his coffee and Lee went back to making food. I crossed my arms over my chest and had my back against the doorway. It was quiet besides the occasional clinking of kitchen utensils.

I turned back to face the boys. "Where's Oli?" I asked, pressing my lips together suddenly getting angry. "I mean he kidnaps me, gets you guys to drug me, forces beer down my throat and makes me sleep with him, and now he's not even here? What the fuck is that shit!" My voice raised the slightest to the point where you knew I was angry. Matt said nothing, just sat there with an amused expression on his face. "What the fuck is so funny?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest and narrowing my eyebrows.

"Nothin' actually." Came a voice from behind me. I jumped, placing a hand over my heart. I slowly turned around, my heart beating faster each second. I knew it was Oli the second I heard the voice but, I was hoping to be proven wrong. I wasn't. I shrank back, all my angry disappearing and turning into fear. He smirked down at me and turned to face the boys. "She wasn't trouble, was she?" He asked. They both shook their heads as a way of saying 'no' and Oli nodded before grabbing my wrist basically dragging me out of the kitchen and back up to his room.

I figured he was mad; by the way he was acting. He slammed the door behind him causing me to flinch. I wondered what had made him so mad, and prayed that I wouldn't be the one paying for it. I watched him intensively as he took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He looked up again, beckoning me to walk towards him. I decided that it was best to just do as he says and not get him anymore angry than he was.

I swallowed down the lump in my throat once I got I front of him, looking down at our feet biting my lip. "Who said you could leave the room?" His voice was calm, but I’d prefer if he would just yell. His voice was too calm, and it intimidated me greatly. I stood silent; the only movement I made was blinking. “Well?” He asked the annoyance clear in his tone.

“I..I didn’t want to be alone. And..I was thirsty. I’m sorry I didn’t know I had to stay in here I.” I was choking up on my own words. I didn’t know what was going to happen and I didn’t know what the right thing to say was. I was on the edge of my toes and I hated it. Finally I looked up at him, and thank god he didn’t look angry. He looked deep in thought, and then shook his head.

“Whatever, you’re right.” He rolled his eyes, and walked further into the room, rummaging through his belongings. I stood there watching, my mouth opened slightly, in awe. I was not expecting that reaction, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t grateful for it. I had a feeling that Oli was a much more complicated person than anybody could guess and it was just my luck that I was stuck with him.