Collectively Unconsciously Composed

The next week literally flew by, like the tour bus speeding down the highway. I was slowly opening up to the boys, only giving them bits and pieces of my past. They seemed to be happy with my presence as they hadn’t asked me to leave yet. The boys had a show tonight in Minneapolis and we were all currently watching Fight Club on the bus. I had already seen this movie over a hundred times so I mindlessly watched it. I noticed Harry frown as his phone screen lit up. His frown deepened as he stood up, pressing the phone to his ear.

“I wonder what his problem is,” Niall muttered as Louis looked at him.

“It’s May,” Louis said, rolling his eyes as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “She’s still keen that Harry has been cheating. I don’t blame her if she wants to break up, she’s a bitch anyways,” Louis said as I smacked his arm.

“Don’t say that! I bet she’s lovely,” I said as he scoffed.

“Lovely? You have never met May,” Niall said, as he reached into a bag of crisps. I rolled my eyes as he opened his mouth to protest. Before I could say anything else, Harry reappeared. He sat down with a thud next to me.

“Hey Scout,” he mumbled as I gave him a sad smile.

“Hey Harry,” I whispered as he sighed. He leaned his head on my shoulder as I took a sharp intake of breath.

“May broke up with me,” he said quietly as I frowned. “She said she’s pregnant,” he gulped as my eyes widened. The boys seemed to have heard the last part of that conversation as their eyes widened too.

“Pregnant?” Louis asked, standing up and coming to sit on the other side of Harry.

“She said she found out two weeks ago. I haven’t been home in two months,” Harry
mumbled. I could see this was really beating him up. I ached to reach out and run my hands through his hair and comfort him, but my arms stayed glued to my sides. Harry took a deep breath before beginning again, “She’s been fucking some guy at work.”

“It’s not your fault Harry,” I said quietly as he took his head off my shoulder to look at me.

“Of course it’s my fucking fault. I wasn’t there!” He snapped. He stood up abruptly and began to pace. “God I am such an idiot. Maybe if I paid more attention to her or went to visit more often,” he said restlessly as Louis stood up and put a hand on his shoulder.

“She’s the one that did it with the dick at work, there’s nothing you could’ve done to change her mind, Haz,” Louis said sadly as Harry sighed.

“What do I do?” he mumbled, once again taking his seat next to me.

“Well she’s obviously messed up in the head to break up with you, so I guess her new boyfriend will help her out,” I said quietly as Harry raised an eyebrow.

“Why is she messed up to break up with me?” he asked in an amused voice as I blushed.

“That is not important and oh look we’ve stopped,” I said, pointing quickly to the window,
hoping to change the subject. Zayn chuckled as he stood up to look out the large piece of glass.

“Appears we have stopped,” Zayn chuckled as he grabbed his phone. The distant sound of screaming was heard as I sighed. Harry seemed to have noticed my discomfort and offered to help me up.

“I think Scout and I are going to go for a walk,” Harry said as my eyes widened. “Come on love, grab your coat,” Harry said as my feet moved mechanically.

I shuffled over to my suitcase and pulled out my green military jacket. I slipped on my Sorel’s and a pair of gloves before returning to join the boys in the front of the bus. Paul was informing everyone that the amount of fans here was off the chart, so the boys had to take extra precautions. I cleared my throat awkwardly as five pairs of eyes looked at me.

“I’m ready,” I said quietly as Harry smiled. He grabbed a black trench coat to throw on over his navy jumper and black skinny jeans. His signature brown boots scuffed the floor as he made his way to the door.

“Come one Scout,” he grinned, dimples and all. I blushed before walking over to the door of the bus.

“Careful Harry,” Paul warned as Harry rolled his eyes. Harry clambered off the bus as I quietly followed.

I stuffed my hands in my pockets as Harry moved to walk next to me, his arm bumping mine. I inhaled deeply, the freezing air burning my nose. Snow was beginning to fall as the sky darkened. I mentally cursed myself for forgetting my phone on the bus, wishing I knew the time.

“What’s with the face, Scout?” Harry laughed, poking my cheek as I swatted his hand away.

“Just thinking,” I mumbled, increasing the space between us. Harry noticed and proceeded to wrap his arm around my shoulders. His scent filled my nostrils as I momentarily leaned into him. I quickly jumped away from him as he laughed.

“Why do you keep doing that? Acting like I’m a disease?” He questioned as I blushed. My cheeks were probably already red form the cold, but I could feel my face was on fire.

“It’s nothing,” I said as Harry sighed. I could tell he wanted to ask me more, but I was thankful when he let it alone.

“I told her I loved her,” he blurted after a couple minutes of silence. I raised an eyebrow as he frowned. “May. I told her I loved her this year,” he mumbled. For some odd reason I felt my stomach drop a bit, but couldn’t quite figure out why. Why would Harry’s love life concern me?

“Did she say it back?” I asked quietly. Harry seemed surprised by my question as his cheeks turned a shade of pink. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and licked his lips.

“No.” Harry said a hint of sadness in his voice. “I guess she just wasn’t as into it as I was. I should’ve known,” Harry said regretfully as I stopped. I grabbed Harry’s hands to get him to stop walking. I dropped them quickly as he looked down at me.

“Harry, what happened is not your fault. May getting pregnant was completely out of your control. She’s the bitch for fucking that guy, it’s not like you were unfaithful to her. Don’t beat yourself up about this,” I said firmly.

Before I knew it, I was being crushed to Harry’s chest, his arms preventing me from escaping. I sighed, realizing that I would not be able to get out of this one. I leaned in to the hug and wrapped my arms around his middle. Harry held me tighter as he pressed his lips to my hair.

“Thank you, Scout,” he mumbled into my hair. He continued to hold me until he noticed I was shivering. “Let’s go back, yeah?” he suggested with a smile as I nodded. He grabbed my hand before we began to make our way back to the bus, lacing our fingers together through our gloves.