Cougar

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PRESENT DAY
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My eyes shot open when a hand touched the side of my face. I blinked as my vision cleared and I stared down at my bedroom floor. My face was smashed against my mattress and starting to go numb. The hand had moved to my hair as I shifted to lean on my elbows, lifting myself to meet eyes with Ally.

She gave me a small smile, pushing her fingers through my hair again.

“You sure do like to sleep,” she teased, poking her finger against my nose. Seeing her smile made me smile. I shrugged, flipping over so I was on my back.

“You know me.” When she took a seat next me on the bed, pulling off her teal cardigan, I said, “I wasn’t expecting you to come over, so I didn’t think I had anything to be up for.” She titled her head, smiling again as she shrugged this time.

“Thought I’d stop by to make sure you’re still alive. I know you don’t do too well on your own for too long.”

As the last chapter showed, that was agonisingly true.

I thanked her for her generosity before asking, “What time is it?” though seconds later, I leaned forward to check for myself right as Ally told me.

“Almost five - have you eaten today?”

I nodded at her face while it grew with concern.

“Pizza.” Just one slice, but if I told her that, she’d drag me with her to Burger King to fatten me up. One more thing I tend to do before leaving Ally - or just when I’m not feelin’ too well about myself - is I slowly stop eating. I don’t know why, but I just do it.

I think it might have to do with when my eating disorder was real bad. The only time I ever felt okay was when I was deathly thin.

Being on the verge of dying was always quite comforting, for some reason.

Ally had looked over to the TV. It has seriously been on for the past two days. Imagine the electric bill. Her hand suddenly reached forward to touch my neck and she snickered.

“Man,” she said, grinning and I knew what she was talking about. “I really did doom you, didn’t I? Are you ever going back to work?”

“Maybe someday.”

We matched smiles. She laughed lightly, keeping her eyes on my face. She slowly bit her lip, making me want to kiss her, but she suddenly turned her head away to stare out my open bedroom door.

She let out a sigh, saying, “J'ai envie de faire pipi.”

I flicked my hand towards the door when she looked at me with a snarky smile. “You know where the bathroom is,” I said, smiling back at her.

“I do.” She stood up, ruffling my hair one more time. I watched her walk out the door to across the hall. She closed the bathroom door behind her. When she came back, we hooked my Wii back into my TV to play Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, because why not.

“I wonder if maybe once, just maybe, Link didn’t want to go save Zelda.”

“…What?”

Ally shrugged as she tried to run past ‘the great Mido,’ but got stopped by him anyway. “You know, like maybe one day Link will be like, ‘Screw you, Zelda,’ you know, ‘I’d rather be watching Unwrapped than be attacked by Moblins trying to save your ass again.’”

I thought about it and agreed.

“You’re so right. I’d rather ride around on Epona and listen to the amazing Song of Time. Sorry.”

“Exactly.” She started to jab her thumb against the A button repeatedly. I saw the small scab on her middle finger from where the shaving razor hit weeks ago She grumbled under her breath, “I know how to work a Deku Stick!”

Also not really caring for Mido’s loooong dialog, I stretched out, getting comfortable. We were lying on the floor. Me, semi-laying on Ally’s lap, because if she laid on mine, she’d feel a boner I knew I’d get. Ally was sittin’ there, back against the foot of my bed.

Thankfully, Mido stopped talking and we went on our way. While Ally had a chat with the Deku Tree, I turned over to lay belly-up. Even from this angle, Ally looked gorgeous. She had a small, little nose that was ever-so-slightly crooked from breaking it when she was thirteen. She was playing soccer when she got whacked in the face with a girl’s elbow. I laughed so hard when she told me and even harder when she showed me the home video.

I faintly made out the scar.

I could see the reflection of the TV screen in her hazel eyes. Her long eyes lashes made her short side bang flicker every time she blinked. It must’ve annoyed her, because she moved her hand behind her ear to fix her hair. It fell back in place milliseconds later, making her sigh.

I fixed my eyes on her mouth and saw she was silently mouthing the Deku Tree’s dialogue. I smiled up at her before ruining the moment. I shifted my head to look at her little belly that I loved so much. I wanted to tickle her just to hear her loud, ear-piercing laugh, but wound up looking at her boobs instead.

They, too, were tiny - just an A cup - but I didn’t really care. Boobs are boobs. They’re all lovely.

Actually, looking at them now, they look like they’re grown a bit since the last time I’ve seen them.

Yay?

I turned my head back to look at the screen right as she finished her chat with the Deku Tree. His colour faded and he slowly died as prophesised. His mouth fell open.

I glanced back up when Ally said in a deep voice, “I’m goin’ in!”

Oh, my God.

I laughed loudly, getting her to grin down at me. She gave her attention back to the game, but I made her direct it at me when I popped my hand up to lay it loosely on the centre of her face.

“Tyler!” she giggled. I felt her nose crinkled against my palm.

“What?”

“Move your hand!”

“Nah,” I said, gripping on lightly. She laughed yet again, but it wasn’t the laugh I wanted. Deciding I needed to go with plan B, I removed my hand from her face. She started to laugh out a thank you, but was cut off by a gasp coming from her mouth. The controller flew from her hands as they clamped down on mine.

She pouted down at me, grumbling, “Don’t touch my fat belly.”

“You’re not fat,” I pouted, pressing my thumbs against her stomach, making her jump.

She laughed out, nose pointing towards the ceiling, “Yes, I am!”

I argued in a mock ‘serious’ tone, though I really was, “No, you’re not.” We exchanged stern looks. Before she could make up any more lies, I pushed my fingers against her sides. She jerked back again and ‘scowled.’

“Don’t you dare,” she warned, giving me a glare. To that, I mentally said ‘smd,’ going to tickle her perfect belly even more. I was kicked up into a sitting position when her knee came up to knock my hands away from her.

I gripped on tighter, finally getting that sought after reaction.

Her usual laugh started out as a high-pitched scream that went into even higher pitched giggles. She laughed her plea for me to stop, squeezing her fingers around mine, but I leaned forward, pushing her back against the side of the bed.

Nose inches away from hers, I widened my eyes in an intimidating way.

“Nah.”

She tried to frown but it turned into a smile when I tickled her again.

“Stoooooooop!” she wailed, her hands going to grip the sides of her head. They covered her eyes, making me have to pull my face back a bit. I did stop tickling her so I could give her a quick peck on the lips.

I pulled back even further to see her sticking her tongue out at me.

Since I’ve had her tongue in my mouth plenty o’ times before I stuck my tongue out to touch hers. She laughed out again, finally taking her hands from her eyes.

“That’s gross,” she said childishly.

“You’re gross,” I shot back, going to grip her sides again. She squealed, grabbing my hands before I could. She held on tightly, keeping them at level with her chest. I took advantage of this and pushed my hands forward to cup her boobs. “See?” I said to her wide eyes. “You’re gross. You put my hands on your boobs. Ew.”

She glared me, but still smiled.

“You’re right. I’m terrible.”

“Dirty, ” I corrected with smirk causing her to roll her eyes at me. Her mouth twisted into another snarky smile.

“Funny.”

“I know.” I bent forward to kiss her one more time before moving sit beside her. By the look of her confused face, I knew she was expecting me to initiate sex. “So,” I started, facing the telly. Link still stood at the entrance of the Great Deku Tree. Ally waited for me to continue, so after a few seconds of stalling I asked her casually, “Do you wanna, like, date me?”

I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see she was looking at me with a raised brow, but slowly she began to smile softly.

“Way to be subtle,” she said, laughing slightly. Seeing I was being serious, her smile got bigger. “Really?” she asked almost like she still didn’t believe me, but I nodded. For some reason, she stopped smiling. “But I thought…you…”

I shook my head and began to explain myself.

“Eh. I thought about and think that maybe if we started dating, I’d feel more obligated to be…committed, like, sex-wise and stuff. Do you wanna date me?” I asked again. Thinking that wouldn’t be enough, I quickly added, “Plus, I kind of like you, anyway, so, to me, it just makes sense.”

“You like me?”

“Well, obviously. Do you wanna date me or not?”

She took a couple more seconds to look at me with a growing smile, then it fell again. Mine dropped as well.

“What if it doesn’t work out like you think it will?”

“I’ll cry.”

She finally smiled at me for more than a half a second. A full second. Then it disappeared. I think deep down she knew this was a bad idea that was most likely not going to work, but the longer she sat there in thought, continuing to look at my face, the wider her smile became.

I smiled right back her, maybe even bigger than hers, when she nodded.

She breathed out her answer.

“Okay.”

I swear to you, as fruity as this sounds…I’ve never felt more happier than right now. This was the first time I ever got to lean forward and kiss her as my girlfriend. Pretty nice.

And so, as boyfriend and girlfriend, we made out. Until she pushed me off so she could finish playing Zelda and ‘kill these damn spiders.’

Yeah. I picked the right girl to finally be in a committed relationship with.

-

“You’re going, right?”

I sighed at my reflection in the mirror for what honestly felt the hundredth time this morning. The hickeys were slowly beginning to get dull. I’m hoping by wearing my Parkway Drive sweater again it should cover most of it up, but - downside - I look like I’m about seventeen.

“I look like a student,” I said to Ally, pouting at her in the mirror. She stood with her head propped on my shoulder in her grey cardigan over a purple American Eagle shirt. Honest, we both looked like we were high schoolers.

“Genius,” Ally said with a quick head bob. “Infiltrate their inner workings and get the DL on their true thoughts of high school.”

I whacked her lightly on the side of the head. My eyes went to her stomach momentarily when it pushed against my elbow. It had a bit more of a bump to it than it normally does.

We ordered pizza again last night and I only had one slice while she ate the rest.

Uh. Oink oink? But not really because that’s mean.

I looked back at her smiling face.

“Maybe you should call in ill and sleep all day - then I will, too, and we can have a sick day together.”

“’I would love that…but,” - she patted me on the shoulders. - “I like a perfect attendance.”

I held in my snort. There was not one, but four days back when I was a high schooler that she skipped school with me for sex in bed all day long.

It was fantastic.

“Let’s go,” she ordered with another pat to my shoulder. She got up on her tippy-toes to kiss my cheek before the toaster went off and she left me to go to the kitchen for her toast. I gave a few minutes to standing in front of the mirror until she yelled at me that it was time to go.

I sluggishly joined her in the kitchen to see her slab a big wad of butter onto one of the two slices of toast. Being an ass, when she finished, I grabbed it from her hands, took a bite, laughed at her whines, then gave it back.

Off we unfortunately went to the high school where I will be laughed at. I can’t wait.

Entering the halls of THS, I was gawked at. I couldn’t tell if it was because of the huge hickeys or because they recognised me from somewhere but couldn’t place me as a teacher.

I seriously looked like a child. As a teacher, that is the last thing you want.

I groaned, stomping my feet at Gill’s loud laugh. Ally and I turned around to see Gill unhook hands with this girl so she could grip her stomach as she laughed even harder.

“You’ve been playing hookie for two days, come back as a sixteen year old who had a great time at a party. I mean…” She took a few hops forward to gesture to my neck. “That is you under those big hickeys, right, Mr. Williams?” I knocked her hand away from me, glaring while Ally laughed. Gill smiled at her, continuing with, “Courtesy of you, I assume?”

“You’ve assumed rightly,” Ally confirmed with a big smile. I could feel absolutely everyone in the commons looking at us, so I abruptly turned to walk away.

“Wow, I hate you guys. Bye.”

I heard them laugh and was reunited with Ally when she ran after me. She hooked her arm around mine as she said, “If anything, you look hot.”

“Yeah, that’s what I want all these under-age teenagers to think about me.”

She stuck her tongue out up at me. I returned the gesture. Upon reaching her closed classroom door, she pulled out her key to unlock it.

“It smells like shit in here,” she grumbled bluntly once she pushed it open. I stuck my nose up in the air and took a whiff. All I got was the faint scent of recently mowed grass that came in from the open window.

I still laughed at her scrunched up nose. She beckoned me over to her desk with her and we both sat down - her in her much-loved swivel chair; me on the foot wide ledge by the window. I slouched with my feet just inches above the floor, cracking my knuckles. Ally scowled at me and I smiled sweetly. She hates when I do that so, naturally, I have do it all the time.

She groaned, slumping back in her chair. After she pushed the power button to turn on the computer and its monitor, she dropped her head back, closing her eyes. Not gonna lie, I checked her out a bit.

This is kind of weird, but I like the way her pants fitted her. She’s a small, thin girl, so it’s hard to find pants that actually fit her. These and a dark denim pair are the only ones. My eyes shifted up to her stomach on their way to her boobs. She was leaning back, so I wasn’t expecting to see anything but flatness, like usual, but the lower half of her stomach was raised slightly.

Again, she’s small and skinny. It’s a little strange. Not that I’m grossed out by it; it’s not like I’m going to stop talking to her because she’s not this tiny stick. I’m just making observations here.

She suddenly groaned again, her hand going to cup her stomach.

“It seriously ranks in here; I’m gonna hurl.”

I hopped down from the ledge for a second to pick up the rubbishcan and placed it by her. “Just in case.” She smiled at me as I took my spot back. Sitting up, she angled herself more towards the trashcan. Her hand rubbed her jaw and she sighed.

A thought hit me abruptly and I felt my heart stop for a few seconds.

“You…don’t think you’re…”

I didn’t even have to finish my sentence before she did with a shake to her head.

“I’m spotting,” she said shortly. “That means I’m about to start. That’s probably it - cramps, bloated, feeling life shit. All tell-tale signs of a period.”

I relaxed a bit before going back to be tense as I said, “If you are…you can tell me. I won’t, you know…leave you. I’m not that much of an asshole. Unless it’s not even mine, then eff you.”

“It would definitely be yours,” she assured with a small laugh. “You’re the only guy I’ve had sex with in the past four years, so.” She quickly looked away, fixing her chin back into her palm. She let out another small laugh, mumbling, “Even though I know I’m not the only girl you’ve slept with.”

Well, damn. We always end up back here, don’t we? I swear we talk about other things, but you guys are never around to see it.

I just kinda sat there, like ‘Errrr….’ and said, “You know about that?”

“I’m not an idiot - and it’s okay. I knew from the beginning you couldn’t be one-hundred percent monogamous. I’m not mad at you.”

“I tried so hard, Ally. I really did, but…”

“It’s fine,” she said again, looking up at me. “I’m just hoping now, you’ll find it more easy to commit to me, though I know it’s rude of me to think I can cure you. You’ve been like this for your whole life. I can’t just change you. But stay the fuck away from Rebeca, okay?”

I literally cackled as I pretended to think about it before I nodded.

“Alright, alright. I’ll try.”

“Because she’s a shank,” Ally said. I could see her jaw begin to clench, meaning she really, really didn’t like Rebeca. I continued to laugh.

“Okay.”

She mumbled quickly, “The whore,” and then added, “Especially if I am pregnant. I will kill her - and you.”

I laughed again, leaning down to give her a peck on the forehead.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Dead, ” she said with even more emphasis. She sounded like a child, really, and the way she looked up at me made me laugh me more time. She was trying to be scary and intimidating.

How cute.

-

Ellie’s eyes grew wide and her jaw dropped. The chalupa in her hand dropped down and landed on the Taco Bell wrapping paper.

“You’re pregnant?” she asked Ally in disbelief.

“Maybe,” Ally stressed for the fifth time. Ellie’s head jerked to me and she gaped even more.

“Are you freaking out?”

I took a small bite from my beef supreme chalupa and shrugged.

“I’m not the one who’s gonna have to pop it out my vagina hole, so.” Ally slapped me on my shoulder as she groaned.

“Thanks for reminding me,” she hissed. My smile was wide. Ellie laughed with her nose pointing towards the ceiling.

“Vagina hole!” she screeched, clapping her hands together a few times. “Tyler, I don’t think you’re mature enough to be taking care of a baby.”

My jaw dropped, though I knew she was right.

“I’m plenty mature - you dumb fuck.”

Ellie had decided to take another bite from her food, but realised halfway through my sentence that was bad idea. It flew right out of her mouth. Ally laughed out a groan, hand going to snake around mine. Her head dropped onto my shoulder while she giggled.

She laced her fingers around mine, saying loudly, “The father of my child, everyone!”

I bowed in my seat to their applause.

Then it hit me.

Oh, God.

I’m going to be a father.

Shit.