This Is How I Disappear

I sighed and glanced at my watch. I'd been standing alone for almost an hour. I was getting frustrated, because I just wanted to leave, but I didn't want to have to walk all the way home on my own. I was about to give up and leave, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around to see Frankie looking at me.

"Hey, did no one ever come back to you?" He asked, noting the lack of the two Ways. I shook my head. I guess he knew I was getting upset. "Well, I haven't seen either one of them, but I'll hang with you if you want." I just shook my head.

"No, you don't have to do that. I'm going to go look for Gerard," I said hopefully. He nodded and I made my way from room to room trying to find him. I went downstairs to the basement, and finally found him. He was downing a shot of vodka, which was clearly not his first of the night. I sighed and walked over towards him.

"Oh, hey baby," he slurred. He walked over and put his arm around my waist. "Hey, guys. This is the girl. Yeah, I've been down here with the guys." I looked at him with disappointment.

"I've been waiting for you upstairs for over an hour..."I said quietly. He tilted his head and his eyes widened.

"Oh, yeah... I felt like I was forgetting something. I'm sorry, babe," he mumbled, leaning down to kiss me. I dodged the kiss and pulled away from him. I started to walk away, but he grabbed my wrist. "Where... Where are you going?" I took a deep breath and shook my head.

"I'm going home, Gerard. I came here to be with you, but you're wasted. I'm just going to go home," I attempted to explain to him, hoping some part of his intoxicated mind understood that I wasn't happy. I tried to get loose of his grip, but he only tightened it. "Please, let go of me... That hurts..." He just smirked at me.

"No, you're going to say right here with me," he said calmly. I ground my teeth together, and jerked my arm away from him. I turned quickly to walk away, but he grabbed me by my hair and jerked me back. I cried out in pain. "Where do you think you're going? You're not leaving me." I elbowed him as hard as I could manage, and he let go and clenched his stomach. I took the opportunity to run. I ran up the stairs, through the hall, and out the door, not once looking back. I slowed down to catch my breath once I was out of that yard. I was three houses away when I heard footsteps behind me. I was fearing the worst, so I took off running again.

"Taylor! Wait!" I heard a semi-familiar voice call out to me. I stopped and turned to see Frankie running after me. He finally caught up to me. Once he did, he bent over, putting his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. "God damn, girl. What fucking sport do you play? Are you on the damn track team? Shit..." I didn't say anything. I just wanted him to leave me alone so I could go home. "What's the deal?" He asked, once he regained his breath. "Why were you running away so damn fast?" I felt the tears starting to build. I just shook my head, hoping he would just leave.

"I just want to go home," I said quietly. My voice cracked near the end and I cursed myself for being so damn weak. He lifted my chin with his hand.

"What's going on? What happened?" He asked, sounding genuinely concerned. I just shook my head, and he clicked his tongue. "That's not going to cut it. What happened? Do I need to go kick some ass?" I laughed quietly. "I will if I have to."

"No, you don't. It's fine... It's just..."My voice cracked again. "It's just that I only came here to be with Gerard, and he was drinking..."I stopped to allow my voice time to settle. His eyes widened.

"Did he hit you?" He asked, his tone growing angry. I shook my head.

"No..."I muttered. I brushed some of the hair out of my face, and he grabbed my forearm gently. He stared intently at my wrist, which had a bruise already forming. He looked at me and shook his head.

"He did that, did he?" He accused. I didn't say anything. I just wanted to leave. "Okay..." He took a deep breath and put his hands together. "Okay, so where are you headed?"

"I just want to go home..."

"Okay, well I'll walk you," he offered. I shook my head.

"No, you don't have to. It's only a few blocks from Mikey's..."I said, hoping he'd just accept that.

"I insist. It's late, and I wouldn't feel right, allowing you to walk home by yourself, especially after all of that. Besides, if I walk you home, I have a better chance of not going to jail tonight," he said, attempting to lighten the mood. I gave up on trying to convince him otherwise. He took off his hoodie and put it around my shoulders. "It's cold out for a September night, isn't it? You're shivering." I felt my face turn red, and I was suddenly thankful for the dark. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes, and handed one to me. I took it gratefully, and he lit it for me, before lighting his own. "So, how come I've never seen you before?" He asked as we started walking. I just shrugged.

"I don't know. Until recently, I usually either had Mikey come over, or we'd go do something," I explained. He nodded. We made small talk for quite some time, and before I realized it, we were at my house. I took his jacket off and handed it back to him. He put a hand up.

"No, you can keep it. I got a million others at the house. Besides, it feels good tonight," he said as he took a deep breath. I pulled the jacket close to me.

"Well, do you want to come inside?" I offered. He just shook his head.

"Nah, I should be heading home. I just wanted to make sure you were alright," he said with a smile. I nodded, slightly disappointed. "But, hey, whenever you need something or just wanna hang out and talk, feel free to call me." He pulled a pen out of his pocket and grabbed my hand. He scribbled a number down, and put the pen back in his pocket. "I'm always here." He leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. I felt butterflies erupt in my stomach.

"Thanks, Frankie," I said, grateful for his company on the way home. He nodded, and gave me a two-finger salute before heading back down the sidewalk. I went inside and shut the door behind me, making sure to lock it. I grabbed a pen off the table by the door, and wrote his number down on a pad next to the phone. I set the pen down and headed to my bedroom. I shut and locked the door behind me. I looked in the mirror, and noted how pitiful I looked. My hair was all knotted up in the back. My mascara had run down my face. My wrist was swollen and bruised. I felt suddenly self-conscious about how I looked when I was with Frankie. I sighed and grabbed a wipe from the box to clean my face. I changed from my dirty outfit into some clean pajamas and Frankie's jacket. I layed down in bed, and the scent from his jacket calmed me down enough to drift into a dreamless sleep.