Tangled in the Great Escape

“Hey”

I felt a gentle tug on the hem of my shirt and I groaned.

“Hey wake up” The tugging felt harder and harder and I smacked the hand off my waist.

“Stop it, I’m sleepy” I mumbled against the pillow and turned my back towards him.

“I’m hungry, let’s get breakfast” He whined and continued to tug on my shirt until I finally had enough.

“Stop! God you’re so annoying” I sat up and smacked him on the arm while rubbing the sleep off my eyes.

“But it worked” He grinned and hopped off the bed. “Let’s have breakfast, do you wanna stay in or go out?” He asked as he stood on the doorway.

“Let’s just stay in, you cook” I shooed him away with my hand and he rolled his eyes.

“Me? Then why did I bother waking you up” I giggled and he walked out the bedroom and to the kitchen.

I let my body fell onto the bed again and sighed. The sun was streaming inside the room from between the curtains, lighting up the room with its warmth. I rolled over to the other side of the bed, Callum’s side, and stretch before standing up. I tied up my hair into a loose and messy bun before putting on Callum’s clean boxer as shorts.

“What are you making?” I asked as I walked closer to him in the kitchen.

“I don’t know, pancakes? I hope this qualifies as pancakes” He shrugged then grinned when his eyes met mine.

“So, what are you doing today?” I asked as I took a seat on the kitchen counter, dangling my legs cutely.

“I’m going to see my Pops and maybe set fireworks, you?” He said, skillfully flipping the pancakes on the pan.

“Well, Robyn asked me to this club party in London but I don’t know if I’m going or not. I’m not a huge fan of clubs”

“Why? You get to dress all slutty without people judging you” He turned his head towards me and smirked.

“I think that’s Halloween. Clubs are filled with self absorbed bitches who does nothing but flirt and judge other girls” I rolled my eyes.

“Well, fuck them and dress like a slut. It’s New Years Eve, you’re supposed to have fun, don’t overthink things” He shrugged and flipped the pancakes onto the plates.

I went quiet because I literally got the same advice from Tony on last year’s New Years Eve party and then he offered me a glass of champagne. But before I got all down and weird, Callum snapped his fingers in front of my face to get my attention.

“Hey, food’s ready” He brought out maple syrup, small cut fruits and Hershey’s chocolate syrup for me to choose from.

During breakfast, we talked about our plans for the New Years break we got for a week. His includes a ski trip with his family while mine include nights alone snuggling in front of the fire and sipping hot cocoa. He was kind enough to offer me a spot in the trip but we both know that it would be awkward as hell.

After we finished, I went up to wash the dishes and clean up while Callum excused himself to take a shower. While I was absentmindedly washing the plates, I realized that my life here is not bad at all; in fact, it’s pretty fucking awesome. I have a new close friend that even though sometimes is too friendly, for my liking, she is extremely awesome and I have never found someone I could connect that well aside from Frenchi. I was also grateful that I met Callum that night, because if it weren’t for him, I would never realize that there’s someone out there that respects me but crazy enough to be in a physical relationship with me.

I was terrified to have sex after what happened, but Callum made it go away. He made me love myself and because of him, I am at my most confident state ever. I’m no longer self-conscious; I’m being more adventurous, both in life and in bed. I actually did things with Callum that I thought I would never ever do, it scares me at first but now I’m so glad I did.

“Are you done or are you going to continue scrubbing that plate?” I heard Callum chuckled form behind me and I immediately turned around with my face bright red because he was only in his towel.

“You shower fast” I tried to ignore his earlier remark by making it about him.

“I’m a guy, we shower fast”

“Well, I’m going to go home, take a shower and probably do some work” I said wiping my hands with an old dishrag.

“You know, you should start bringing stuff here. So you don’t have to go back and forth to take showers,” He said casually.

“What do you mean? Like I can have my own drawer and stuff?” I laughed

“Yeah, why not? You’ve been spending a lot of time here and you always leave to take a shower or to get changed. Why not leave some here?”

I groaned and rubbed my face. “Why does this feel like the first step of moving in?”

“Hey relax” He chuckled, “I was just trying to make it convenient for you. If you think it’s weird then don’t, don’t sweat it Cass” He waved me off and went back to his room to get dressed.

God, Cassie. Stop overthinking things, I thought to myself. I know he was just trying to make it easy for me; he couldn’t be hinting things, right?

After gathering all my things and getting dressed, I gave Callum a kiss and went out the door and to the train station. On the way to my apartment, Robyn called to confirm tonight’s plan. I still wasn’t really feeling the club thing but I want to prove Callum wrong on what he said about me overthinking things so I said yes.

I rested my head against the glass window and closed my eyes for a brief second. I had a picture of all the guys and girls as my wallpaper and when I disconnected the call with Robyn, I found myself staring at the picture for a good minute. I know I said my life here is getting better and I feel almost at home but it’s not home. I miss everybody so damn much that sometimes when I’m at home doing nothing or just staring off into space, I found myself thinking about them a lot.

Nobody back home knows about Callum and I don’t think I’ll be telling anyone about him anytime soon. I guess even though I felt what I feel now; I’m still concerned about what people think about me. I don’t want my friends thinking that I got easy since I moved here.

When the train stops, I fast-walked back to my apartment and went straight inside because it was freezing cold outside. I checked my voicemail and turned on the electrical switch to get the heat running. After I got settled, I took a long hot shower and lounge around until it was time for me to get ready for the party.

It was 8 PM and I was standing in front of my dresser half naked, trying to figure out what to wear. I felt like I’m jumping head first to the whole club thing because I didn’t really think it through, I just said yes. Now I’m stuck in my underwear trying to figure out what to wear.

I remembered Callum telling me to dress revealingly but I don’t know if I’m comfortable with it. I don’t want random guys groping me as I dance or hitting on me just because my boobs were all over the place. So I went rummaging through my dresser and found a sleeveless tight little black dress that falls mid-thigh with a mesh detailing on the chest. I twirled in front of the mirror a few times to see the back and I was pretty happy with it, the dress looked sexy but not too sexy that I look cheap.

For my hair, I decided to just let my hair down and curled it a bit so it has the sexy Victoria’s Secret wave going on and put minimal eye make up but I paired it with oxblood red lipstick.

Just as I was about to start stressing about what shoes I should wear, I heard my phone go off. I opened it and there was a new WhatsApp message from Robyn. I started using that when Avela whined about how inconvenient emailing was and how it would be easier for us to communicate if I downloaded WhatsApp. Everybody that knows me would know that I’m the last person to be up to date with social network and all that shit. I don’t even have twitter!



I quickly typed in a response



I threw my phone onto my bed and went to my closet to find my dark red pumps that goes with my lipstick. I grabbed my lipstick and blotting tissue, phone and money and shoved it into my tiny purse before grabbing my coat and running out the door.

The train ride was different since everybody there was dressed to a party, I feel like I’m on the Party Express train. After about an hour, the connecting train was late, I arrived at Marylebone Station nearly freezing to death because I was stupid enough for not wearing tights underneath my dress. I spotted Robyn standing right outside the station wearing a black and silver sequined mini dress with black pumps and bright red lips.

“Robyn!” I shouted and waved my hand to get her attention. When she did, she smiled brightly and reached forward for a hug.

“You look fantastic babe, I’m sure half of the club wants to take you home tonight” She winked as we linked hands and walked towards the club.

“You’re one to say. Ugh, I just can’t wait to get completely wasted and dance on tables” She laughed and that night we made it a mission to get absolutely hammered and have a good time.





“Hey dude, you ready? Frenchi is driving me insane, can we please go now?” I looked up from my phone to see Vic walking towards me shaking his head.

“What did she do now?” I chuckled.

“She was yelling at me because I accidentally trip over her stool chair. I swear I don’t understand how Mike puts up with her being pregnant and insane” He shook his head again in disbelief and I could only laugh in return.

“Alright then, is Jaime coming?” I stood up from the couch and put my phone in my pocket.

“Nah, he’s helping Mike setting up the grill and helping the girls decorate the house”

I nodded and we both went out the door and into my car. The guys agreed since we had Christmas dinner at Mike’s that for New Years party we would have it at my place so Ma doesn’t have to travel and she could just go to her room when she’s tired.

After the fistfight I had with Jaime, which nobody knows other than the three others who were involved, I felt like everything was starting to fall into place. The girls were civil with me, I got my best friend back and I’m starting to feel like my old self again.

Vic and I were on shopping duty, which involves getting beer, liqueur and meat to be grilled, while the girls, including Lauren were at home preparing the party and decorating the house. We also made a note to get fireworks; because it’s fun breaking the law sometimes.

“I say we should get the fireworks first and the groceries later, so the meat wont be all soggy and gross,” I suggested while keeping my eyes on the road.

“Sure” Vic nodded and kept silent.

It was starting to feel awkward because none of us are talking and the only sound we heard was coming from the engine.

“So, how are things with Jaime? You two good?” Vic broke the silence, which I was grateful for.

“Yeah, he came up to me an actually apologized” I chuckled, still not believing it because Jaime has a track record for his enormous ego.

“Really? No way” Vic slapped his knee and laughed out loud.

“I swear, I thought he was trying to pick a fight again but he just sat there and apologized”

“Well I never…” Vic chuckled and shook his head. “How are things with Cassie?” He asked again, this time sounding a bit careful.

I instantly wipe the smile off my face and cleared my throat, I really wasn’t expecting that question from Vic because he seemed like he doesn’t really care about it.

“Uh, I haven’t talked to her” I said with a small smile.

“Why not? Have you tried?” He asked again but not in an intrusive manner, simply just curious.

“Not really, I guess I haven’t really thought about contacting her. I figured she’s not ready for it” I shrugged, trying not to think too much about it.

“Well, how do you feel? About Cassie, I mean”

“I… uh, I don’t know. I mean, I miss her so much and it’s hard losing her but I guess I know where she’s coming from. I was a total dick and I would do the same if I were her” I made a turn to the small dodgy place that sells kickass fireworks that were close to the Time Square type of shit.

“Do you want her back?” Vic asked nonchalantly.

“Of course I do. I just don’t know how or how I’m going to start” I killed the engine and sighed.

“I would start by contacting her, then go up from there. Baby steps dude” He said while giving me a small smile and got out of the car. I followed suit but since that moment, I had my thoughts on what he said about contacting Cassie.

-

“We’re back bitches!” Vic called out to the house once we got inside, hauling bags of groceries and an entire box of illegal fireworks.

Jaime and Mike came out jumping, grabbing stuff and helping us to the kitchen. I placed the grocery bag on the kitchen counter and the box of fireworks on the backyard, to prevent myself getting yelled at by Frenchi for ‘potentially endangering her’ by putting stuff in her way.

“How can I help?” I asked the girls while they were busy cutting up vegetables and Lauren was blowing up balloons for décor.

“Can you marinade the steak? Or are you going to mess that up as well?” Frenchi raised her eyebrows cockily.

I rolled my eyes and took the steak marinade from the fridge and began working on the steaks. I put salt and pepper rub on half of them and the rest I marinade with Worcester sauce.

After taking care of the steaks and putting them in the fridge to let the marinade soak, the guys and I went off to be boys and open beers in the backyard. I was smiling all night thinking that this is how things are supposed to be.

“Hey buttballs! What do you guys think you’re doing? There’re like cases of beer in the kitchen waiting to be put on ice. Get on it!” Rachel shouted from inside the house with an exaggerated hand gesture.

“Not it” Jaime put his finger on his nose.

“Not it” Followed by Mike

“Not it” And Vic.

“Fuck you guys” I cursed and they responded with a laugh, shooing me as I got up and walked inside the house.

“Where is it?” I asked once I got into the kitchen and Rachel pointed into the stacks of beer cases on the side of the kitchen counter. I began to unpack them and dragged the cooler from the storage room. I was filling the cooler with ice we bought from the supermarket earlier when I accidentally overheard the girls talking while preparing dinner.

“I wish Cassie was here, it’s not the same without her” Avela frowned and played with the onions she chopped.

“You’re just saying that because now you’re stuck on food duty” Rachel smirked causing Frenchi and Lauren to laugh.

Avela threw a few onion cubes to Rachel and shook her head. “Shut up! I’m serious!”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s just not fun without her. I wonder what’s her life like in England, I bet she’s now drinking tea in the afternoon like those fancy-ass English people” Frenchi laughed.

“She does! Even she was laughing about it” Avela chimed in. “And I think she’s seeing someone there” She add with a hushed tone.

I felt my body tensed when I heard what she said, even with the hushed tone, I could hear it loud and clear.

Cassie is seeing someone?

Why didn’t Avela mention anything? Why did she encourage me to talk to her? Why did she say she was team ‘Tony and Cassie’?

“Fuck” I muttered under my breath.

“What?” I snapped my head towards the source of the voice, which was Rachel who was staring at me weirdly.

“Nothing, the cooler is done. I’m going to go out front, let the guys know if you need anything else” I mumbled and went out the door.

-

The party was going on full force, everybody was having fun and they all were having the night to remember. Beau and Eric from blessthefall were here; Jaxin and Natalie came not long after and by 10 PM, almost everybody we know and invited from the music industry were here.

I, on the other hand, was sitting outside on the front yard with a bottle of Pabst Blue Ribbon in my hand. What Avela said earlier hits me like a big yellow school bus and I wish I didn’t hear that. I wish I hadn’t because now I feel like I’m running out of time to try and get Cassie back to me.

“Hey squirt, watcha doin’ here alone?” I turned my head and saw Lauren taking a seat next to me with a bottle of beer in hand.

“I don’t know, guess I’m not feeling the party as much” I shrugged and took a swig.

“Is it because of what Avela said earlier? I know you heard her” She gave me a sad look and squeezed my arm.

“No” I paused. “Yes” I sighed.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

“Not really” I started peeling off the label off my beer bottle and Lauren just nodded in response.

After a minute of silence, I just sort of blurted out everything like word vomit.

“I’ve always loved her you know? I think I knew she was special the second we spoke to each other. I guess I was just afraid of being another fuck up in her life that I actually ended up being another fuck up in her life”

I ended up telling her about Cassie, from the moment we met until the day she left. Lauren sat there patiently, listening to my ramblings without interrupting me. I was also glad that she wasn’t judge-y like she was the first time.

“Sorry, I know I was rambling like an idiot” I shook my head and gave her a sad laugh.

“No, no. I’m glad you’re telling me this, you must feel a little bit better right?” She poked my arm and I chuckled.

“Yeah, thanks for listening. It’s nice to talk to someone who’s not biased” I threw my arm around Lauren and pulled her close, giving her a sideways hug.

“No worries Perry, glad I could help” She looked up and gave me a sweet smile.

I looked at her and it was as if time stopped. Our faces were so close I could see the specks of green in her baby blue eyes, and it’s like my body has a mind of its own, I started to move closer to Lauren. Our lips were about to touch when she suddenly pull away and pushed me backwards.

“Whoa, what the hell dude?” Lauren sat straight and looked at me with confusion and panic.

I closed my eyes and groaned. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what got into me. I swear I wasn’t trying to take advantage of you”

I can’t believe I was so stupid!

She took a deep breath in an attempt to regain her composure before sighing. “It’s fine, but do that again and there will be some serious damage Perry. Understood?” She stood up and put out her hand for me to grab.

“Yeah, got it. Sorry” I grabbed her hand and got up.

“It’s fine, let’s go back to the party” She dragged me inside and got me to blend with the crowd.

I guess faking smiles and pretending to be interested is my new social skill. I just don’t know whether I should be proud or sad about it.