You Make Me Want to Punch You in the Face

Ren rubbed the dog tags, that she never took off, from over the cloth of her shirt. She was in a cab heading from the Australian airport in Sydney to the BVB tour bus, passing the time by listening to her ipod. She had been clutching her stuffed backpack as a pillow through the whole ride. She always traveled light when on the road. Ren didn’t have many things anyway, so she just had essentials. A small amount of clothes rolled up tight to make extra room, an extra pair of shoes, tiny hotel style toiletries, a laptop, an e-reader, and an old leather bound drawing journal. That was it no makeup or nicknakes, just what she needed. When they finally arrived Ren got out and stretched. When she finished she took the time to take in her surroundings. There was one larger bus and a truck to carry the stage equipment.

Ren put on her backpack and said hello to the roadies and crew. It was a little after lunch, so they all seemed energetic. The breeze picked up and made the feather ear cuff she always wore clink against her earing. As she made her way to the bus they were met by CC and Jinxx. Sammi wasn’t around, she worked in LA after all. Jinxx waved as they walked over. She was happy to see him, they had become friends during warped and it was nice to have someone she knew around.

“Ninja girl!” CC gave her a low-fived handshake. They had spoken on occasion when CC would steal Sammi’s phone. He was the only other person here Ren kind of knew, besides Jinxx or course. “Been so long since I’ve seen you almost forgot what you looked like. Jinxx says you’re gonna be our new bodyguard. Congratulations on getting certified, why didn’t you tell me?”

“Nice to see you too man.” She shoved her hands in her pockets as the small group stood right outside the bus. “I did! Right before I joined Warped. Remember: you stole Sammi’s phone while we were talking about Sonic and accused me of getting you pregnant.”

CC rolled his eyes up to the left as if trying to find the memory. “Oh, yeah! By the way, where’s my child support, bitch?”

Ren laughed through her teeth, “Always the entertainer. So, where is everyone?”

Jinxx finally spoke up, “Oh, Ashley and Jake are milking some hangovers back at the hotel. I think Andy is there too.”

“Probably having another argument.” CC huffed looking away.

Ren raised an eyebrow, “With who?”

“He’s been having some issues with Juliet. No big deal.” Jinxx said.

“Oh, okay. Is Jon around?”

CC nodded and pointed to the bus. Ren waved goodbye and entered the bus, trying to find her new boss. She had to go all the way to the back to find Jon sitting in the large lounge area.

“Hi Jon, nice to see you in person.” She shook his hand in greeting.

“You too. Though you’d be taller.”

Ren was a little put off but she could play around, “I could say the same thing.”

He seemed to get the joke and laughed. “Strong handshake though. With that and if your reputation is true, I’m happy to have you aboard.” Knowing they were going to meet up Jon already had all of Ren’s equipment laid out for her. “So you’ve got two button up shirts with the BVB symbol on the side. You’ll need to where these whenever we go out to events or interviews, so the local staff know you’re with us. I hope you brought undershirts. The guy that quit on us never wore them or washed these things. Made the whole bus smell like shit.”

Ren made a face of disgust, “These are new, right? Like they didn’t belong to that guy.”

“No. no. These are new. There’s also a baseball cap and a belt with a holster for your walkie-talkie and low grade Taser.”

Her eyebrows shot up, “Your guards have Tasers? Not that I don’t know how to handle them.”

Jon laughed, “Just kidding. Our head guard Uriel has one, but he’s never had to use it. I think that’s everything. We’ll be arriving at the first venue tomorrow. Feel free to hang out till then. Unless the boys go out tonight, then you’ll need to go with them.” He folded up all her things and gave them to her. “Now pick a bunk they all get taken.”

Since the crew was so large every column of bunks had three beds in it, making for a total of 15. Many of the bunks have already been taken. After a minute of searching she took a top bunk on the right above a vacant one. The bottom was already taken by another guard. Ren threw her bag and equipment inside, then climbed up trying to get used to what would be her home for the next month. This bus was a little bigger than what she was used to, thankfully she was fit enough so that when she jumped she could easily pull herself up. She always preferred the top bunk. Usually with her headphones in, Ren was able to block out the sex noises radiating through the bus late at night. She moved her bag and work uniform to the top right corner so everything would be easily accessible. Pulling the curtain closed, she turned on her e-reader to continue where she left off in Catching Fire.

There was a commotion from the other side of the curtain now and then, but overall quiet. Her reading was interrupted after about an hour by someone rudely opening her curtain. Ren ripped her attention away from the book to look at the serenity intruder.

“Uh, hi.” Andy was standing there with a lost look on his face. His voice was deeper than anything Ren could have guessed. She always thought it would be higher for some reason. Andy sized the girl up quickly, wondering if he’d seen her before.

Ren’s eyes looked all over the bunk then back at him. They were in an odd predicament, since Ren was practically laying down and all she could see was Andy from the collar bone up. God, he is tall. “Hello,… is there… something I can help you with?” Usually Ren made it a point to make eye contact with everyone, but doing that to Andy was going to be considerably more difficult. His eyes were just a little too blue, a little too gorgeous for her actually pay attention to what he was saying. However, Ren had resolve, so she would make eye contact no matter how much her lady parts hated her for it.

“Uh,” Andy smiled and looked around seeming confused. “You’re in my bunk.”

Ren lifted an eyebrow at him, “Uh, no. You weren’t here, I’ve been in this bunk for hours.”

Andy couldn’t believe this girl. He was already having a shit day and there was some girl in his favorite spot. Why was she staring at him like that? It made him uncomfortable. He did that odd sigh, the one where a noise came from deep in the back of the mouth, the one that portrayed frustration. Andy’s eyebrows also pinched together as his eyes squinted shut. “Okay, who are you?”

“I’m Ren, your bodyguard.” Ren’s tone showed her disapproval at the third degree she was getting.

Andy’s face was totally blank for a moment. He would have believed her if she was taller, less attractive, and a man. He laughed looking away, “Your kidding right?”

Ren wore the offence on her face now, “Ya, I’m obviously kidding. I’m actually Gabriel, angel of the lord, here to take you away.”

He rolled her eyes at her, “Look you need to get out before I call security. How the fuck did you get in anyway?”

A frustrated huff escaped her lips as she pulled out her BVB cap. “I am security.” She gave him a smart ass look before closing her curtain on his face and whispering “Jackass.”

The look on Andy’s face was priceless. He practically ripped the curtain off. “Excuse me?”

“Oh my god, dude what is your problem?” Ren swore she was going to spend the night in an Australian jail for assault.

“I don’t know who you think you are, but you need to get the fuck out of my bunk.”

She smiled at him, trying to hide her aggravation while her knuckles turned with over her clenched fist. “Well, I already introduced myself, so must just be stupid. I’m not moving, so suck it up and take whatever’s left.” She grabbed her e-reader and tried to ignore him.

Andy ran his tongue against his teeth looking to the ceiling in total frustration. “Look, I have had the longest fucking day. So either get out, or I’m going to fire you.”

That made Ren laugh, her sweet voice rang though the bunk. On any other day Andy would have thought it was cute, but right now it just sounded like nails on a chalkboard. At least, that’s what he was telling himself. Ren replied, “Look hot stuff, you can threaten me all you want but if I do actually get fired, because I refused to move, I’ll sue. I haven’t done anything wrong and you wouldn’t want the media to paint an unbecoming picture of you, now would you? Can you see it?” Ren held up her hands as a gesture, “Front man for BVB fires female guard for refusing to switch bunks! You’d be the jack ass of the century. Why the hell do you want this bunk anyway?”

Andy huffed in defeat knowing she saw through his bluff. “Because it’s the furthest away from everything. Easy to block out… the noise.”

“You mean the sex?” Ren said plainly, not bothered at all by the topic.

He sighed and glanced down, “Ya, these assholes don’t hold back.” The corner of Ren’s mouth turned up, she was surprised they had something in common. Andy continued, “So, you’re not gonna move?”

She pulled her e-reader up and opened up the book again, “Nope.”

“Fine.” The word seeped through his teeth viciously as he flung himself onto the bunk right underneath her. Ren was about to go back to her book when she heard hard knocking. Andy was trashing around enough to make the whole column feel it.

Ren’s eyebrow twitched in annoyance. She hung herself half way out of the bunk upside down. Her head was completely vertical and her long dark hair almost touched the floor. Andy looked so odd. His limbs were sprawled all over the bunk convicting him of guilt. Ren almost growled, “What? Are you like ten?”

Andy smiled at her and pulled his limbs back against him, “Well, I am here. But maybe if I was on the top bunk I could age a little.”

Ashley walked over wanting to know what was going on, “Well, who do we have here?”

She turned her head to the side like an owl. “My names Ren, I’m your new bodyguard, and your friend’s being a dick.”

Ashley couldn’t help but laugh a little, “You’re the new bodyguard? What are you? Five feet?”

“I’m 5’3” and we’ve already met.” She flipped out of the bunk and just stood there waiting for what came next.

“Have we? A shame I didn’t get to know you at the time.” Ashley leaned on the end of the bunk wearing his ‘you know you want it’ pose.

“Oh you tried. Remember: You’ll never know.” Then she winked and turned her attention back to Andy.

Ashley pursed his lips together, aggravated at the memories that were flooding back. “Oh yeah. Well now, I just have more opportunity to change that.”

As she turned her attention back to Ashley in order to respond Andy took the opportunity to take Ren’s bunk. She quickly turned her attention back to the bunk debacle. “The fuck man?!?”

Ashley bit his lip to hide his laugh. “You know you could sleep with me if you want.” He winked at her and then tapped the bunk across from the one that’s supposed to be Andy’s.

Ren sighed, her frustration mounting. She looked at Ashley, “Let me just deal with this, and if I’m desperate enough I’ll let you know.” Ashley pouted a bit before leaving them to their problems. Ren grabbed her bag as Andy was about to throw it into the vacant bunk. She held it steady as he tried really hard to push it passed her. With just a little effort she pushed it past his scrawny arms and back into the top bunk. “You’re just a big ass baby, aren’t you?”

Andy shot her a ‘how dare you’ face as he leaned over the outside of the bunk to look down at her. “Here’s the thing. I’m up here now. You’re not gonna get me to move. I am done goofing around with you. And now I’ve got your shit, so you’ll have to deal with that.” He laid back down and in a huff.

Ren was done. “You’re not gonna move? Fine. Then we’re sharing.”

“What?” Andy was a little shocked, but turned totally dumbfounded when Ren hopped into the bunk. “What are you doing?!” The shakiness in his voice showed his surprise.

She crawled over to his body on her hands and knees without touching him, to the wall side of the bunk. “Finishing my chapter.” She pulled out her e-reader from where Andy had shoved it in her bag. Ren just sat there and started to read as if nothing occurred.

Andy on the other hand, was blatantly nervous. He was having a bad day with Juliet and Ren wasn’t helping matters. When she climbed over him though, it didn’t seem to matter. He got a good look down her shirt, by accident of course. He caught sight of her dog tags and black bra. Her cleavage was tanned, meaning she was probably tanned all over. The though made Andy lightly blush. She really was beautiful, one of those girls that didn’t need to try to look attractive. Even if she was being a total bitch and dressed like a dude. “You’re joking right? You’re just going to sit there and read?”

She smiled, not bothering to look at him. “Yep. I was here first. Deal with it. Asshole.” When Ren was pissed she didn’t care for social graces.

Andy sat up on his elbows, looking at her with frustrated brows, and an unhinged mouth. He was totally baffled at this girl. She didn’t seem to give a shit about him being who he was and also didn’t seem to budge on anything. “Are you always this hard headed?”

“Are you always such a whinny shithead?” She didn’t look up from her electronic, even when there was a shout from the front of the bus that they were taking off.

Andy laid back down and stared at the alleyway. He had no idea what to do at this point. It was just such an awkward situation. He was about to say something when the bus started and distracted him. All of a sudden there was a flash that got Andy’s attention again, "The hell?" Before he could ask Ren explained.

“Just a little insurance if you can't keep that gaping hole in your face shut." Before he could ask she continued, "You know what would suck? If I posted this picture of you in bed with me to facebook.” The picture on the e-reader was really incriminating. Ren had place her head right next to Andy’s back, her eyes were shut, and the angle looked like they were spooning. “My friends around the Houston music scene would surely post it to their twitters. From there it would spread like wildfire: Andy Biersack Caught Cheating!” She turned her head to stare at him with a look that could kill.

Andy stared at her, who was this girl? The look she was giving him was actually frightening and, before he could stop himself, Andy felt the muscles in his neck tighten as he swallowed nervous. “You… wouldn’t do that.”

“You have no idea what I would do. Now shut up or get the fuck out.” Ren hadn’t broken eye contact the whole time, it was obvious she was done with the conversation.

Andy sighed in defeat, he just rolled his eyes and rolled out of the bunk returning to the one below. He just stared at the bunk ceiling. Andy would definitely need to talk to Jon about the new bodyguard. She was just too much hustle to keep around. The thought of those hanging dog tags entered his mind. Was she in the army? Was she serious with those threats? Slowly the thoughts of the dog tags turned into thoughts of Ren’s cleavage. Andy just groaned and rolled over, wallowing in his frustration.

Ren was fanning herself with the e-reader after she had closed her curtain. She took in a deep breath and released it shakily. Those blue crystals called eyes were definitely going to be a problem. His hair was really short right now and spiked up. It drew all the attention to his eyes. Which made it even harder for Ren to stay mad. He was so pretty that Ren started to regret taking this job.