Status: Complete | Finished <3
Southern Love
A Huge Mistake
Kellin's P.O.V.
A huge mistake, I have done a huge mistake. How could I have done something so dumb? I let go the love of my life, my everything. I didn't realize it would be that hard to leave Vic. Was it really worth it? All I did was break his heart and cause him what I wanted to avoid: pain. I've been selfish, only thinking about me. I broke him, I'm a monster. As for me, I'm destroyed, broken. Vic hates me, and I'm still and will always be madly in love with him. What have I done? The picture of him leaving my room with an angry and hateful expression hunts me. My brain has been showing me the scene for the entire day. What an horrible day. I've been laying in bed since he left, just wishing that death could come faster, spare me from all this pain I caused...and wishing that Vic was next to me. I needed his hugs, his warmth, his kisses...I needed him. My strenght and my reason to live was gone, and he took my heart and all the good in me with him. True love can touch us one time, and that one time was Vic and will forever be. This was no ordinary love, it was unic, perfect. And I ruined everything, as usual. It was all my fault.
It was realling getting late and sleep wouldn't come easy, I felt it would never come at all. I needed to change my mind a little. I opted for a long walk by the beach, fresh air was my only friend now. I didn't care about the way I looked, I looked like a mess and I was fine with it. You know why? Because that is what I am, a mess. A big and horrible mess. I made my way to the beach as tears fell down from my swollen eyes. This beach holds so many memories. Memories were the only thing that were left from my relationship with Vic. As I got near from it, I saw something, someone, standing up from the sand. That person was all alone, and it take no time for me to guess who it was. I could recognized Vic in every single situation. It was so painful to see him, and not having the right to run to him, hold him and kiss him passionately. I made that impossible. I stayed where I was and watched Vic walking towards the water. He couldn't walk straight, he probably got drunk to forget everything I caused. He kept walking until half his legs were under water. He didn't stop there, he kept walking. What was he doing?
''Vic!'' I yelled. But he didn't hear me, or he didn't want to hear me. He just kept walking, until all of his body was underwater. That's when I realized that Vic was comitting suicide.
I run as fast as I could, made my way in the water. I was crying like a baby, I made the love of my life want to take his own life away. I'm a monster. I found his body in no time, I took him out of the water hoping it wasn't too late. He wasn't moving, there were no reactions coming from him. I searched for a pulse, I found none. This couldn't be real. This was just a nightmare right? It wasn't, it was all real. Fortunately, I learned the CPR technic back in California. I wasted no time in doing it praying it would work.
''Please Vic, don't do this to me.'' I spoke to myself.
A few repititions later, Vic spat all of the water that was his own body. He was alive, weak but alive. Thanks God.
''Thanks God, you're alive.'' I said as I took him in my own arms.
''Kellin?'' He wondered weakly.
''Yes Vic, it's me.'' I replied. ''I'm here, you'll be okay. I'm so sorry for everything I've done, I'm sorry I caused you all this pain. I thought you were dead.''
''You saved me?'' Vic asked.
''Yes Vic, yes I did.'' I answered. ''Thanks God I saw you, I can't imagine what would have happened if I haven't decided to go for a walk. You would be dead Vic, why did you do that? Why?''
''I-I wanted the pain to go away.'' He replied crying. ''I couldn't live any longer withtout you, it was just so hard Kellin. I wanted the pain to go away. I-I was mad at you for breaking my heart, but I was and still am madly in love with you. I thought that If I died, you would still want me in another world, that we could be together forever...''
''Vic babe, I'm sorry, I'm so damn sorry.'' I whispered and placed a kiss on his forehead.
''Why did you save me?'' He asked.
''Because I love you Vic.'' I replied.
''Please don't tell me you love me.'' Vic pleaded. ''It's already hard being aroud you right now in your arms, don't tell me you love when we can't be together. It breaks me because I love you too Kellin, I want to hate you for what you did, but I just can't. I love you more than everything that it hurts.''
I closed my eyes and kissed him without thinking. It's only been a day, and I missed his lips like crazy. I wasn't expecting him to kiss me back, but he did. We both needed it, we needed each other more than ever.
''Was this a goodbye kiss?'' Vic wondered as he broke the kiss.
''No Vic, I need you.'' I replied. ''I made an horrible mistake by breaking up with you. Again, I'm so sorry. I didn't want you to feel that bad, if I knew I would have never done that. I almost lost you forever. I'm a monster who's madly in love with you. I feel like I don't deserve you anymore, I never did. I love you Vic Fuentes. I hope you'll be able to forgive me. I know I don't deserve you to accept my apologies, but know that I love you. I thought I was doing a good thing, but I was totally wrong. Please forgive me.''
''I-I need to think about it Kellin, but know that I love you too...'' He replied. ''I just need a good night of sleep, I'll give you my answer tomorrow.''
''Oh yeah okay sure.'' I replied nervously. ''Do you want me to take you to your room?''
''Yes please.'' He said.
I helped him to stand up and led him to his room. We walked silently to it, what a day it has been.
''There you go.'' I said as we reached his room. ''Goodnight Vic, I'll see you tomorrow.''
''Kellin wait.'' Vic said as he grabbed my arm.
''What is it?'' I wondered.
''Can you pass the night with me please?'' He begged. ''I-I don't want to be alone and you, well, are the only who can make me feel better...''
''Of course ba- Vic...'' I replied. We made our way in his room and took place in his bed. It was weird not hugging him and feeling his warmth on my body... but that was still better than not having him at all.
''Goodnight Vic.'' I spoke.
Vic gave a me smile and placed a delicate kiss on my lips.
''Goodnight Kels.'' He replied
And with that, I fell asleep, wishing for tomorrow to be a better day.
A huge mistake, I have done a huge mistake. How could I have done something so dumb? I let go the love of my life, my everything. I didn't realize it would be that hard to leave Vic. Was it really worth it? All I did was break his heart and cause him what I wanted to avoid: pain. I've been selfish, only thinking about me. I broke him, I'm a monster. As for me, I'm destroyed, broken. Vic hates me, and I'm still and will always be madly in love with him. What have I done? The picture of him leaving my room with an angry and hateful expression hunts me. My brain has been showing me the scene for the entire day. What an horrible day. I've been laying in bed since he left, just wishing that death could come faster, spare me from all this pain I caused...and wishing that Vic was next to me. I needed his hugs, his warmth, his kisses...I needed him. My strenght and my reason to live was gone, and he took my heart and all the good in me with him. True love can touch us one time, and that one time was Vic and will forever be. This was no ordinary love, it was unic, perfect. And I ruined everything, as usual. It was all my fault.
It was realling getting late and sleep wouldn't come easy, I felt it would never come at all. I needed to change my mind a little. I opted for a long walk by the beach, fresh air was my only friend now. I didn't care about the way I looked, I looked like a mess and I was fine with it. You know why? Because that is what I am, a mess. A big and horrible mess. I made my way to the beach as tears fell down from my swollen eyes. This beach holds so many memories. Memories were the only thing that were left from my relationship with Vic. As I got near from it, I saw something, someone, standing up from the sand. That person was all alone, and it take no time for me to guess who it was. I could recognized Vic in every single situation. It was so painful to see him, and not having the right to run to him, hold him and kiss him passionately. I made that impossible. I stayed where I was and watched Vic walking towards the water. He couldn't walk straight, he probably got drunk to forget everything I caused. He kept walking until half his legs were under water. He didn't stop there, he kept walking. What was he doing?
''Vic!'' I yelled. But he didn't hear me, or he didn't want to hear me. He just kept walking, until all of his body was underwater. That's when I realized that Vic was comitting suicide.
I run as fast as I could, made my way in the water. I was crying like a baby, I made the love of my life want to take his own life away. I'm a monster. I found his body in no time, I took him out of the water hoping it wasn't too late. He wasn't moving, there were no reactions coming from him. I searched for a pulse, I found none. This couldn't be real. This was just a nightmare right? It wasn't, it was all real. Fortunately, I learned the CPR technic back in California. I wasted no time in doing it praying it would work.
''Please Vic, don't do this to me.'' I spoke to myself.
A few repititions later, Vic spat all of the water that was his own body. He was alive, weak but alive. Thanks God.
''Thanks God, you're alive.'' I said as I took him in my own arms.
''Kellin?'' He wondered weakly.
''Yes Vic, it's me.'' I replied. ''I'm here, you'll be okay. I'm so sorry for everything I've done, I'm sorry I caused you all this pain. I thought you were dead.''
''You saved me?'' Vic asked.
''Yes Vic, yes I did.'' I answered. ''Thanks God I saw you, I can't imagine what would have happened if I haven't decided to go for a walk. You would be dead Vic, why did you do that? Why?''
''I-I wanted the pain to go away.'' He replied crying. ''I couldn't live any longer withtout you, it was just so hard Kellin. I wanted the pain to go away. I-I was mad at you for breaking my heart, but I was and still am madly in love with you. I thought that If I died, you would still want me in another world, that we could be together forever...''
''Vic babe, I'm sorry, I'm so damn sorry.'' I whispered and placed a kiss on his forehead.
''Why did you save me?'' He asked.
''Because I love you Vic.'' I replied.
''Please don't tell me you love me.'' Vic pleaded. ''It's already hard being aroud you right now in your arms, don't tell me you love when we can't be together. It breaks me because I love you too Kellin, I want to hate you for what you did, but I just can't. I love you more than everything that it hurts.''
I closed my eyes and kissed him without thinking. It's only been a day, and I missed his lips like crazy. I wasn't expecting him to kiss me back, but he did. We both needed it, we needed each other more than ever.
''Was this a goodbye kiss?'' Vic wondered as he broke the kiss.
''No Vic, I need you.'' I replied. ''I made an horrible mistake by breaking up with you. Again, I'm so sorry. I didn't want you to feel that bad, if I knew I would have never done that. I almost lost you forever. I'm a monster who's madly in love with you. I feel like I don't deserve you anymore, I never did. I love you Vic Fuentes. I hope you'll be able to forgive me. I know I don't deserve you to accept my apologies, but know that I love you. I thought I was doing a good thing, but I was totally wrong. Please forgive me.''
''I-I need to think about it Kellin, but know that I love you too...'' He replied. ''I just need a good night of sleep, I'll give you my answer tomorrow.''
''Oh yeah okay sure.'' I replied nervously. ''Do you want me to take you to your room?''
''Yes please.'' He said.
I helped him to stand up and led him to his room. We walked silently to it, what a day it has been.
''There you go.'' I said as we reached his room. ''Goodnight Vic, I'll see you tomorrow.''
''Kellin wait.'' Vic said as he grabbed my arm.
''What is it?'' I wondered.
''Can you pass the night with me please?'' He begged. ''I-I don't want to be alone and you, well, are the only who can make me feel better...''
''Of course ba- Vic...'' I replied. We made our way in his room and took place in his bed. It was weird not hugging him and feeling his warmth on my body... but that was still better than not having him at all.
''Goodnight Vic.'' I spoke.
Vic gave a me smile and placed a delicate kiss on my lips.
''Goodnight Kels.'' He replied
And with that, I fell asleep, wishing for tomorrow to be a better day.
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