Oh, Saint Nick

I shut the door to my bedroom after making sure Evelyn was occupied in her room.

“Breath Emmalyn. Everything’s going to be fine.” I wrapped my dressing gown tighter around my body and tried to calm down listening to my mothers voice.

“They want to take her.” I hissed through the phone, sitting down on the end of my bed and running my fingers tightly through my hair. “How can I be calm right now!”

“Look your father and I will start talking to people but it’s not as easy as she’s making it out to be. You’ve been named as Evelyn’s guardian and you’re doing great. There’s been no problems with Evelyn or any reason as to why you wouldn’t be a fit guardian.” I hiccupped and furiously wiped away the fresh tears.

“I can’t lose her Mum. Not so soon after Erin.” I pulled me knees up to my chest and rocked to the side so I was lying in the fetal position.

“You could come back here sweetie. There’s nothing over there now.” I sighed and rubbed the palms of my hand against my eye roughly before answering.

“I know Mum but Erin had a whole life for Evie planned out here. Everything she wanted for her was here and I need to try and give Evie that life.”

“You can’t give her everything Erin wanted to. Erin couldn’t even give her everything she wanted to.” My voice cracked when I tried to reply so instead I just stayed silent, breathing through the panic that began to wash over me again. My Mum’s voice soothed me through the phone.

“You need to be strong for Evie darling. She can’t see you like this.” I nodded at the phone even though she couldn’t see me. There was a knock at my bedroom door that made me sit up quickly, wiping away the tears.

“I better go be with Evie. I’ll talk to you later. Bye, love you.” I hastily hung up and opened my bedroom door to see a sad Evelyn standing on the other side.

“Aunty Em?” She asked hesitantly, water already filling her eyes. Feeling guilty for acting like this in front of her, I picked her up and soothingly rubbed her back.

“Hey princess. I thought you were playing in your room.”

“You were crying.” She stated softly, burying her warm head into my neck, her little fingers tangling with my dressing gown tightly.

“I was just talking to my Mum and we were talking about your Mum and how much we miss her.” I told her softly, kissing her temple and walking out to the living room.

“I miss her too. And Daddy.” She said quietly, getting comfortable on my lap when I sat down.

“Yeah? Do you miss her all the time? Or just some of the time now?”

“All the time, sometimes I forget to and then I feel bad.” I shook my head at her and brushed her hair back from her face.

“You don’t have to feel bad sweetie.” I hugged her closer again.

“I fink about them when I remember things.” She told me, her eyes not meeting mine. I could see a few watermarks the tears had already made on her face. “And sometimes you don’t do what they did for Chwismas.”

“What stuff did you do?” I asked her curiously. I was trying to keep up with traditions but I was also too afraid to bring up something that would hurt her or make her throw a tantrum like the star topper did the other night. The star that was still sitting in its box on the other side of the room.

“We watch Chwismas movies.” She told me, looking up hopefully. I smiled down at her, pressing my lips to her forehead again.

“Well why didn’t you say so?” I tickled her into she began to smile. “How about we spend the rest of the afternoon watching movies and I’ll even make some popcorn.” She nodded eagerly and scrambled off my lap.

“I’ll get Ellie the Elephant.” She disappeared down the hall and come back a few minutes later carrying her stuff toy and her large quilt.

“You choose the movie and I’ll grab some popcorn.” I told her, heading into the kitchen to scrounge up the popcorn bag before chucking it into the microwave. I checked in on Evelyn when she pulled a movie out of the collection I had set up after we moved. ‘Rise of the Guardians’ she had chosen. I hadn’t yet seen the movie so I didn’t mind. The popcorn beeped and I stuck the whole lot in a large bowl and joined her on the couch. Cocooning her against me and under her blanket we got comfortable and waited for the movie to start.

She seemed content to sit there and watch allowing me to hold her closely and breathe with her, just appreciating that I still had her for however long I still could. I knew that Jacquie and Lewis were never happy that I had Evelyn but I never thought they would resort to this. I loved Evelyn and she was happy here. It wasn’t easy but we were both happy and I couldn’t understand why they would want to ruin what worked between us so easily.

There was a knock at the door half an hour into the movie. Evelyn yawned and allowed me to shift her to the other side of the couch so I could go answer the door.

Mason was on the other side of the door with Jonah.

“Hey can I ask you for a favour?” Mason immediately asked. I nodded.

“Dylan’s cars broken down so I’m going to go pick him up while the tow truck takes the car. Would you be able to look after Jonah?” He pleaded with me. I smiled down at Jonah.

“Yeah of course.” I took Jonah’s hand from Mason and pulled him into my apartment. “Did you want to use my car?” I asked him as Jonah ran straight past me and into the living room, I could hear Evelyn’s surprise.

“Nah, Harry’s taking me, he’s downstairs now. Thanks so much for this we shouldn’t be gone too long but I’ll text you when we are heading home.” I accepted Mason’s kiss on the cheek before he was racing off down the hallway. I could hear Jonah and Evelyn chatting with each other excitedly. I smiled, happy to know that Evelyn was happy.

“Well since Jonah’s here how about I make some more popcorn.” Both kids jumped excitedly and followed me into the kitchen. “You want to watch the rest of the movie with us Jonah?” The little boy nodded happily.

“It’s my favourite movie.” He announced, climbing onto a chair while I popped another bag in the microwave.

“Me too.” Evelyn rushed to say, sitting on the seat next to him. I laughed and chose not to voice the fact that this morning Evelyn’s favourite movie was Madagascar because of all the animals.

“Well I haven’t seen it so no spoilers!” I warned them both making them burst into giggled and I knew both would probably tell me how it ends before the end of the movie.

I curled back up with both of them, one either side of me with the popcorn on my lap. I didn’t know how much popcorn ended in their mouths or on the couch but they were both having fun so I wasn’t worried.

Halfway through the movie I got a call from Jacquie. I ignored the call without hesitation and went back to the movie. She left a message but I deleted it before I even considered listening to her. I needed time before I even wanted to see or speak to either of them again. My hand absently found the back of Evelyn’s head and I ran my fingers through her hair, comforting myself with the knowledge that I had her, here with me. And right now that was all that mattered. We surprisingly worked together and that was more that I had hoped for when this arrangement first began.

The movie was almost over when another knock sounded at the door.

“Must be your Daddy’s.” I shuffled Jonah over towards Evelyn; they sprawled against each other, both too full to move after being stuff with popcorn. I opened the door to find Mason, Dylan and Harry standing there all carrying bags of what smelled like food.

“In the mood for Indian?” Dylan asked before brushing past me into my apartment. I laughed and let Mason and Harry in after him, the smell of food already making my stomach grumble. Harry smiled and pressed a kiss to my cheek in greeting before following both boys into my living room. I blushed and shut the door quickly following behind them all. Harry threw me a wink before two children attacked him.

“Harry!” They both squealed, trying to climb into his arms.

“Well I guess we know who the favourite one is.” Mason huffed, falling down onto a couch after placing the Indian food on the coffee table. I made myself comfortable on the floor and started opening up containers with Dylan.

“How’s the car?” I asked Dylan who shrugged and shuffled the food around.

“Not sure, something about the engine. Just going to leave it with the mechanics and they’ll call me when it’s finished.” Mason headed off into the kitchen to grab cutlery while Harry settled the kids and all three of them sat on the floor with Dylan and I, around the coffee table.

“You want to borrow my car in the morning?” I asked Dylan. He hesitated.

“Don’t you need it?” He replied, digging his fork into the first carton and taking a bite.

“Well if you just drop me and Evie off in the morning we can just take the bus home. I only work like four hours tomorrow so we’ll be fine.” I told him, smiling.

“I could pick you up?” Harry offered. I shook my head at him declining.

“No point. We can just take the bus.” I insisted not wanting anyone to go to any trouble for us.

“Don’t be stupid. Harry’s offering so just accept it and thank him.” Mason scolded me like I was a five-year-old. I mock glared at him before smiling at Harry.

“I accept. Thank you Mr. Styles.” I battered my eyelashes at Harry as he pretended to tip a fake hat, playing along with me. Mason rolled his eyes and threatened to throw food at me. Dylan threatened to take all the food away from Mason if he did.

“Oh I love this movie.” Harry pulled everyone’s attention to the TV where the movie was paused. “I love how the children end up becoming guardians of the Guardians.” I glared at Harry and took the container he was eating away from him. He stared at me in surprise.

“I haven’t watched it before today and you just told me a spoiler.” I glared at him, he smiled sheepishly and tried to apologise.

“See Emma, I didn’t say anything.” Jonah smiled proudly of himself and continued to eat his food. I smiled fondly at him and smoothed his hair down, assuring him that he was my favourite boy in the room. Making the other three boys squawk in mock outrage.

“What about you Evie, who’s your favourite boy? And you can’t choose Jonah, he’s already taken.” Evelyn pouted at Mason before eyeing Dylan, Harry and Mason up.

“Well.” She began, placing her fork down and settled her hands into her lap; she was taking this choice very seriously. “I fink Harry is my favourite,” Harry punched the air before holding his hand out to Evelyn for a high five. “because he’s new so we should be nice to ‘im and becwause he make Aunty Emmy smile.” I flushed darkly at Evelyn’s words and glanced over at a blushing Harry before avoiding eye contact with him.

“Well don’t worry, Dylan, I like you way more than I like Harry.” Mason said loudly and I silently thanked him for breaking the tension.

“I guess if I can’t have Jonah, you can be my favourite.” Dylan sighed loudly before throwing an arm around Mason and kissing his cheek. I laughed at Mason and Jonah’s matching disgust as Mason wiped his cheek off with dramatic flair while Jonah and Evelyn laughed gleefully at the show. The previous conversation was already long forgotten by them both. I made eye contact with Harry while he laughed at Mason and Dylan. He smiled warmly and his foot nudged mine underneath the coffee table. I smile, genuinely, and allowed the warmth his smile created engulf me completely.

As If Evelyn knew how much I needed her today she spent the rest of the night practically sitting in my lap or lying all over me. I happily allowed her, enjoying the comfort of having her around and the boys company as well.

It wasn’t until much later, when I was cleaning the kitchen did I even think about why I was so sad to begin with.

“Want to tell me what happened yesterday?” I glanced up at Dylan in surprise as he brought the rest of the dirty cutlery into the kitchen and dumped the empty boxes in the trash. “We heard you practically stomp up the hallway yesterday before slamming your door shut. Harry was going to come over but we convinced him to give you time. Something obviously set you off.”

I sighed and checked that Mason and Harry were keeping Jonah and Evelyn busy before turning to Dylan.

“Jacquie and Lewis, Ethan’s parents want to take Evelyn.” I told him outright. He almost dropped the cup in his hands.

“What?” He hissed at me, keeping his voice down low enough that no on else could hear, thankfully. “Can they even do that?”

“Apparently. Jacquie said they’ve been talking to people about it.” I shrugged at him, too tired to put much fight in my words. “They don’t think I’m happy with her or she with me or some bullshit like that. Apparently they can do a much better job. Because it’s so easy looking after a kid after their parents just died.”

Dylan rubbed my back sympathetically and we stayed silent for a while and continued to clean up the kitchen.

“Weren’t you named legally as her guardian though? Doesn’t that count for something?” He asked. I shrugged again.

“I don’t know. My parents think so but Jacquie and Lewis seem way too confident. Mum and Dad are suggesting I get a lawyer.” Someone cleared their throat from the doorway and I was startled to see Harry standing their watching Dylan and I curiously. I wandered how much of our conversation he had heard.

“I uh was just going to offer any help if you needed it?” I glanced around at the now clean kitchen and shook my head at Harry, smiling.

“Nope all done. Let’s go back to the others.” I wrapped my hand around Harry’s bicep and lead him back into the living room. Dylan followed closely behind us, eyes trained on me.

Mason eyes us curiously when we came back into the room but my eyes pleaded for him to talk later. Wait for Dylan to tell him everything. He seemed to concede because he turned his attention back to Jonah and Evelyn quickly.

“Oh I almost forgot to tell you. I saw your stalker Santa today.” I stared at Harry, incredulous.

“You’re serious?” I laughed at him when he nodded.

“I was with my Mum at the grocery store and he came up and started talking to me. Asking about you. I had to tell Mum that he was a friend of yours so she wouldn’t be too freaked out by him.” I laughed harder.

“Compared to your fans Harry, a stalker Santa is probably quite tame.” Dylan commented.

“I don’t know, Dylan. You haven’t seen this guy. He’s literally everywhere in my life. I don’t think even Harry has any fans that know that much about his life. And he keeps asking creepy Santa questions as well.” I frowned as Dylan laughed. Mason looked curious.

“What type of creepy Santa questions?” Mason asked.

“Like if there was anything I wanted for Christmas, or asking me what I wished for. He even spouted stuff the other day about being with your family and loved ones over Christmas.” I told him.

“He takes his job way too seriously.” Harry added in, he stretched his feet out across the couch and shuffled them against Evelyn’s head that rested in my lap, it took her a minute to realise what it was before she was squirming and crawling up Harry’s legs to get his revenge.

“Or maybe, just maybe,” Mason pushed forward to the end of his seat and bounced up and down excitedly. “Maybe he is Santa.” I rolled my eyes at him and shot an eye at the kids, not wanting to life at the notion right in front of them. I still threw a pillow at Mason’s head though; Dylan just rolled his eyes.

“Evelyn does call him Santa.” Harry pointed out like he was taking this notion seriously. I couldn’t help the roll of my eyes this time as Harry used only half his energy to fight off Evelyn’s attempts of attack. Soon enough Jonah joined in to help and Harry had to re-double his efforts.

“She only calls him that because he was being Santa at the Shopping Centre.” I told him while he was lying under Jonah and Evelyn, his feet knocking around wildly against my thigh.

“Well there’s one way to test the theory.” Mason interrupted, pulling the attention back to him while Harry slowly suffocated under two five year olds.

“And how do we do that?” Dylan asked, obviously amused but the whole idea.

“Ask his name.” Mason shrugged like it was the most obvious solution. “And if it’s Nick or Nicholas then he is obviously Santa.”

“Yeah obviously.” I laughed and leant over pulling Jonah off Harry’s head and received a quick flash of teeth before he chucked how own body of a squealing Evelyn burying her beneath him. Harry was amazing with Evelyn and she seemed to really like him. I was worried about their relationship though, we didn’t know how long Harry was going to be around for and I didn’t want her to lose someone else.