Touch.

“John, what the hell have you done?” Lennon asked, looking at the blood stains all over John's shirt. His entire body slung as he walked through the apartments door. She could see how angry he was from the look on his glassy green eyes.

“I stabbed him.” He scoffed, taking off his filthy shirt. “Don't worry I just stabbed him on his right leg. He deserved it. For doing all of this to you, he deserved everything I did to him.” John's voice was starting to raise with each word he said. Lennon felt her entire body freeze at John's words. I stabbed him.

“Y-You sta-stabbed him how?” She stuttered, her pulse racing as she waited for her boyfriend's answer.

“With a fucking knife,” He simply said, walking to the kitchen as he grabbed some water for himself, “What else would I stab him with?” He was talking so freely, as if he didn't care or even think about what he did.

“You stabbed Jackson with a knife?!” She was starting to take in what just happened. Her eyes watered, as she screamed. “What the fuck were you th-thinking?!” She yelled, making John jump from his seat. “Jackson was my ex boyfriend, John. I was his once and I loved him. What were you thinking?! Are you fucking crazy?!” He looked at her for a moment and his face expression changed. Jealousy. She could see jealousy forming in his body.

“You're defending him?” He asked, his voice clear. “You're defending the person who did all of this to you?” He pointed at the bruises over her body and her eyes moved to the ground. “As far as I know Lennon, I was the one that saved you from him.” He stood up from the kitchen table's chair and walked towards her. His face was inches away from hers as his hands moved to her wet cheeks. “I love you,” he said lowly, leaning in to kiss her.

“N-No.” She pushed herself back lightly, “You- I- I can't do this, no.” She ran her hand through her hair looking away from John. He wasn't sure about how he was feeling towards her actions. Instead he let out a frustrated sigh. “I have to go see him, John.” She looked up at him, her eyes wet. “M-my parents and his p-parents are gonna find out soon and y-you wo-won't be safe.” She was crying once again as she tried to put her words together.

“I don't care.” He almost wanted to yell, “I don't care, Lennon.” Anger was forming in his body but he tried his best not to do anything that could scare Lennon. “Don't go.”

“I-I have to.” She said pacing around the room, looking for her jacket as she slipped into her shoes.

“Lennon. Don't go.” He said again, this time his voice was more of a command than a request. Her eyes moved to his, surprised by his tone. John was never like this, she thought. He was never an angry control freak. What happened?

“I'm going.” She ignored him and walked away to the door.

“Lennon.” He yelled, making her steps stop as she stood holding the keys giving John her back. “If you leave through this door,” his voice was calmer now. Still angry, but calmer. “You will not be mine and I will not be yours.” she felt her entire body freeze as those words left his mouth. What the hell was he trying to do? This isn't the John that Lennon loves.

“You're drunk.” She said her voice above a whisper, “You don't know what you're saying.” She tried to convince herself that he wasn't sober and he didn't mean anything he said. She knew that John wouldn't say such things.

“No.” He said, “I am aware of what I'm saying right now and I'm telling you..” He clenched his fists as his jaw tightened, “If you leave right now, don't come back home.” That was the last thing she heard from him as she forced her feet to walk out of the door. Her tears streamed down her face as she stood by the elevator trying her best to get herself together. Her hand covered her mouth forcing the sobs away, leaning her weak body against the wall. She let out a muffled sob, her hands folded into her chest. What did I just do?! She wanted to cry and scream at the top of her lungs. She wished if this was just a nightmare, and she would wake up the next day laying right next to John. But it wasn't, and it scared her so much.

“Just.. Please, listen to me.” John whimpered, his green eyes watering. He noticed how her hair got longer, her eyes had a shade of blue, just like the ocean. They looked so.. pale and numb, John thought. Her silence allowed John to start speaking, he breathed in; his eyes not moving away from hers as he talked. “I... I don't want to do this anymore Lennon. I don't want to live another day like this.” His hands slipped into his pockets as his lanky body stood in front of her nervously, “I made a huge mistake, I-I know that but I don't want to live without you. I can't..” She looked away, her eyes moving to the ground. “I know that I can't use this as an excuse but I was drunk, I was out of my mind. I swear, I... I didn't mean anything I said to you.” He waited for her to say something, anything. But her eyes stared at the ground and she said nothing. “Please, s-say something.”

“What do you want me to say John?! Tell me, what do you want to hear?” She raised her voice, their eyes locked now. “That I waited an entire year for you? That I gave up? And that every single night I'd tell myself that you will come tomorrow, but it was all just lies. Things that just kept me going.” She pursed her lips, forcing her tears away folding her hands into her chest securely. John stared at the ground shamefully, knowing exactly that he should've had more courage to come and see her before this. “I.. I don't know who you are anymore, John.” Her voice cracked when she said his name, “I started a new page and you're not a part of my life anymore.” Her voice was so cold and harsh, John winced looking away. His mind was telling him to leave but his heart was saying something else. “I-I should-”

“Lennon.” A voice called her name and John could feel someone walking towards them from his back, “I didn't find the cake you wanted but I-” His body froze as he stood by John, looking at him. Turning his back, John saw a guy with black short hair, grey sharp eyes holding a bag.

“Uh. I'm sorry for interrupting.” He chuckled, “Hi, I'm Matt.” He pulled out a hand, “Lennon's fiancé.” John felt like everything he's been building up for so long shatter right in front of him. His face expression was unreadable, surprised mostly shocked. I'm Matt. Lennon's fiancé. This must be some kind of sick joke, John thought. His eyes immediately flew to Lennon and he could see how uncomfortable she looked. He stood in silence but his eyes were screaming at her.One year. Just one year, and all of this happens? What else is she hiding from me now?, John wanted to feel anger, even though he technically didn't have the right to feel like that. His jaw tightened and finally he spoke, “Lennon's fiancée?”

“Yes. John, this is Matt. My fiancé.” Lennon straightened her back, “Matt, th-this is John..” she introduced him to Matt as if she was ashamed of doing it, “My... my... f-friend.” John could feel a rush of pain going through his veins. He bit his lower lip, nodding towards Matt. “Y-yeah. I'm her friend.” He said it, with pain in his voice but Matt couldn't notice that since he was already offering John a hand.

“Nice to meet you, John.” He smiled towards him and shook his hand, “Now I've got Chinese food in my hands and I'm starving.” He raised the bag from his hands laughing, “And dude, you should come and join us if you'd like.” Matt asked John, but he only shook his head, “Come on, I'll get to know my fiancée's friend more. I'm actually excited since Lennon never tells me about her friends.” He pulled Lennon with one arm as he snuggled her into his chest. She laughed awkwardly, as John forced a chuckle.

“N-no I think I'm alright,” John said, “I actually have something to uh- to catch up with.” He rubbed the back of his neck. The only thing he was thinking of was that it was a dumb idea to come here from the first place. He felt like shit and he wished if he never even agreed with Eric.

“Okay.” Matt said, “But we'll see you soon right!?” He asked smiling. “You should come to my bachelor party next week,” John raised his head, looking more alert. The wedding is next week. This has to be some kind of nightmare because the only thing John wanted to do is just wake up.

“Y-Yeah, that.. that sounds good.” John wasn't aware of what he was saying but instead his eyes never left Lennon's. She looked at him, as if pitiful. Don't look at me like that. I'm okay. I am okay. He wanted to yell at her, tell her that he doesn't need her in his life too, but he knew that he'd be lying if he said that. Turning his body to leave. He wished if the floor could crack open and swallow him, right there. The steps he made outside felt like he was leaving to a miserable life. He knew that he wouldn't stop thinking of her and he knew that nothing can ever change that. I love you. He closed his eyes and remembered the last time she told him that. Wishing if he could go back to that moment, and never come back here. The hot air hit his skin the moment he walked outside, he looked behind him one last time expecting Matt and Lennon having their lunch happily, but it was only Lennon standing there, her brown hair falling down her shoulders as she looked at him. He wanted to walk to her and grab her into one last kiss. Just one. He missed the way she'd wrap her arms around his neck when he'd grab her to kiss her. He missed the way their fingers intertwined together when they'd hold hands. He gave her one last look as he turned his back to walk away.

As she watched John walking towards the van outside, all she could think of was how sad he looked. I'm sorry, John. I didn't mean for this to happen. She wished if she can tell him that, grab him into a hug. Kiss him once again. But she reminded herself that it's all over now. It's over. A hand clasped around her waist and she smiled knowing that it was Matt.

“Come on, your lunch is waiting for you.” He whispered into her ears as he kissed her cheeks.

“Let's go.” She gave him a smile, as they both walked towards the table.

I'm sorry John, she glanced as the van disappeared from the parking lot. I'm sorry.