Captain Clutch

Chapter 30

The next couple weeks were not only busy, but interesting. We sold the house pretty quickly and I was all moved in with Sidney. We made the living situation work well. He gave me the space he thought I required and I let him have the space I thought he needed. I guess we haven't been doing the whole space thing well because we seem to be fighting a lot. I thought I would have fallen right back into my old ways and turned right back to drugs, but I've been holding on strong. Our fights have been petty and stupid. Sometimes I just feel like Sidney isn't happy with me being around anymore. Today was no different.
"Do you have to leave shit everywhere?" I muttered
"What?" Sidney said. He was getting changed in the closet. I was picking up clothing around the room. I swear all I did was laundry.
"Nothing." I said.
"I didn't here you." Sidney said coming out of the closet half dressed.
"Doesn't matter." I said walking out of the room and down the stairs. I heard Sidney sigh in the bedroom.
"Stupid NHL superstar." I muttered walking around the corner holding a laundry basket. I wasn't paying attention, just muttering to myself causing me to walk right into Beau.
"Shit sorry." I said blushing.
"Who is a stupid NHL superstar? I hope its not me. I'm really not a superstar." He said trying to keep a straight face. I shook my head.
"Not you silly." I said. I glanced upstairs.
"Ah, captain." Beau said quietly. I rolled my eyes.
"Let's go out." I said suddenly.
"Where?" Beau said raising his eyebrow at me.
"Lunch or something." I said getting excited.
"Sure." Beau said taking the laundry basket from my hand. "Go get dressed."
"Okay. Give me ten minutes." I said turning and running up the stairs two at a time. I heard Beau chuckle. I guess he was watching me. I walked into the bedroom and straight into the closet. I stripped my clothes off as I walked into the closet.
"Oh hey babe." Sidney said.
"Hi." I said pulling on a pair of skinny jeans and a lose T-shirt with a V-neck.
"Where are you off too?" Sidney asked watching me closely.
"Lunch or something with Beau." I said casually not looking at him.
"You don't want to spend some time together?" Sidney asked.
"Not really." I said half joking.
"What the fuck Kayla." Sidney said.
"It was a joke Sidney, god." I said rolling my eyes.
"Then stay home and spend time with me." Sidney said coming up behind me and moving my hair off my neck. He slowly kissed down my neck to my shoulder.
"Stop it Sidney." I said pushing him off me.
"Honestly Kayla. Its like you never want to spend time with me anymore." Sidney said pouting. He left the closet and went into the washroom. He slammed the door behind him. God he was such a child sometimes. I rolled my eyes. I grabbed my purse from the closet floor and left the room. I saw Beau sitting on a chair at the bottom of the stairs.
"Ready?" I asked.
"Whenever you are." He said. I know he heard Sidney. I guess he thought it wasn't a good idea to bring it up. We put on our jackets and left the house without another word from Sidney.

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We were just finishing up lunch at a little cafe in downtown Pittsburgh when Beau finally brought up Sidney.
"Is everything okay with you and Sidney?" Beau asked. I sighed.
"Not really." I said after a couple minutes.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Beau asked.
"I guess I should. I haven't really talked to anyone about it and I learned in recovery that bottling things up can cause relapses." I said.
"So what's going on?" Beau said.
"He's acting like a child." I said. "I think we might need some time apart."
"You mean like break up?" Beau asked looking concerned.
"I don't know." I said.
"Sidney is crazy about you. You know that." Beau said.
"I guess we just spend to much time together or maybe we don't spend enough time together. I don't know anymore." I said.
"You haven't relapsed, right?" Beau asked quietly. I smiled at him.
"No Beau, I haven't. I've been doing well surprisingly." I said.
"What do you mean surprisingly?" He said obviously trying to understand my past. I thought for a couple minutes not really knowing how to respond.
"It's hard to explain, but when I have problems like this with family or loved ones usually the first place I run is drugs." I said.
"Why?" He asked. I chuckled.
"That's how addiction works. When times get rough you run to the one thing that takes all the pain away." I said.
"Ah, I understand." He said. He dropped it after that. We finished up lunch and he paid the bill like a gentleman. My phone rang in my purse. I pulled it out and saw it was my brother calling.
"Maxime." I said into the phone.
"Kayla, my baby sister. How are you?" Maxime asked.
"I'm good, how are you?" I asked him.
"Good, how's The Kid?" Maxime asked.
"I assume you are asking about my boyfriend Sidney." I said sarcastically.
"Oui." Maxime said.
"He's fine." I said drily.
"Trouble in paradise?" Maxime asked sounding a little sad.
"No." I said.
"Come visit me baby sister." Maxime said.
"Maybe in a couple days, we are leaving for a couple days tomorrow morning and won't be back until the end of the week." I said.
"Okay well, come when you get back." Maxime said. I thought about it for a second.
"I'll call you when we get back." I said.
"Sounds good." Maxime said.
"Love you big brother." I said.
"Love you too." Maxime said. We hung up. Beau smiled at me.
"Ready to go?" Beau asked.
"Anytime you are." I said. We put our coats on and left the cafe. Beau started driving away from the house.
"Where are we going?" I asked after a couple minutes.
"For a nice drive." Beau said.
"Why?" I asked.
"Because you need it." Beau said. I smiled. I stared out the window, deep in thought. I didn't deserve Sidney. He was so perfect and I wasn't. Why did he want to be with me? I was some low life junkie at one point.
"What are you thinking about?" Beau asked looking at me.
"My life." I said.
"What about it?" Beau asked.
"The fact that someone like Sidney could ever even look in my direction." I said. Beau pulled over to the side of the road and parked the car. He turned in his seat to look at me.
"Kayla listen to me. You are a wonderful, beautiful girl. Sidney is lucky to have you. You're past has nothing to do with how your present is. Just focus on the good things and don't worry about the days behind you." Beau said. I smiled.
"Thanks sunshine." I said. Then we both started laughing.
"Let's go home." Beau said. He started the car and drove back to the house. I need to focus on the good things in life and be happy with the wonderful things I have in my life.