Love Is Deaf, Not Blind

I don’t see Jace at lunch but I still seat with Jordan and Sammi. Caleb I noticed was a few tables away, he kept looking over at us but I wasn’t in the mood to forgive him.

A hand waves in front of my face, I turn to face Jordan, “What are you doing Wednesday.”

I shrug, “Don’t…know. Wait…I…have…speech…straight…after…school.”

“After that?”

“Nothing.”

“I was thinking that You, sammi and I could go see a movie?”

I shake my head, “Deaf…remember.”

“I know, I didn’t forget. There is a theater in Austin that does subtitled and even sign movies on a Wednesday night.”

“In…that…case…yes.” I smile wondering how much research he would have done too fine a place that does that. Austin was only a half hours drive.

“Awesome.” Jordan beams. I again think about how much I love his eyes when he does smile.

I practice sign with Sammi again and Jordan joins in, I’m glad that I have made two friends that are willing to meet me half way.

I struggle during class without Andrew, I end up with my sketch book out drawing again. I’ glad when the final bell rang. I happily gather up my books and I ran out the door straight into Jay. I stagger back a few steps, and look up to see him his brown eyes show me that he does remember Friday night.

I push past him, knocking him to the side a bit. I head straight for the doors leading into the parking lot. The feeling of panic I felt Friday returns, as does the abandonment feeling when I find that Jace’ car is gone.

I walk around the outside of the building to come in a different door than the one I exited from. I ran down the hall dropping loose leaf pieces of paper, my homework and notes. I don’t pick them up as I head for the girls bathroom. I look under the stall of the first toilet to see it empty and I lock myself inside.

I sit down and bring my feet up onto the seat, I wrap my arms around my knees. Tear start to stream down my face but I remain silent.

When the tears finally stop I pull out my phone and try to call Jay but it doesn’t connect, his phone must be off.

I send a text asking where he was, I wait 15 minutes for him to reply before I text Mom.

Can u pick me up?

It takes her a while to reply. I can’t pick u up I’m at work. Where is Jace?

I seat there wondering what to do now. I didn’t want to message Jordan because I know how puffy my face gets when I cry. I also didn’t want to lie to him about why I was crying and I didn’t want to tell him about Jay.

I decide to call Andrew, he answers quickly again. ’Jocelyn hi.’

’What r u doing right now?’

’Eating Pizza and watching Disney movies. Why you want to join?

’If I can?’ He looks surprised by that, I nearly laugh.

“Umm sure.” ’Did you need to be picked up?’

’Yeah if you don’t mind?’

’No not at all. Are you at your house?’

’No I’m at….school.’

’School?’ Andrew signs a look of confusion on his face.

I think about telling him I was just picking up homework but I don’t want to lie to him. ’I went to school today.’

Why didn’t you let me know.

I just needed sometime alone.

“Ohh.” ’Well let me know when you want me back?’

Tomorrow. I missed you.

He smiles, ’I’ll be there in about 15.’

’See you soon.’ I hang up with a smile on my face.

True to his word Andrew pulls up in front of me in a faded blue ford 15 minutes later.

’Ready to relive your childhood?’ Andrew asks me when I finish buckling my seat-belt.

I nod smiling, ’Diffidently.'