White Walls

It was a tugging on my hips that pulled me out of my slumber Tuesday morning. I wasn’t ready to go back to work after my three-day weekend and preferred to spend the day in bed with John. That’s right, Lucas didn’t have a nightmare and slept in his own bed for the entire night. We were both pleased, John for different reasons.

“Babe I have to get up,” I murmured, pressing kisses to his bare chest. “I have to go to work.”

“What are we doin’ with the baby?” John murmured, rolling on top of me, his lips pressing against my neck. His stubble tickled my skin and sent shivers down my spin, only causing him to smirk once he realised what he was doing to me.

“You need to sort that out,” I mumbled, “take him to your parents’, I’ll pick him up-“ I let out a moan as his lips went down my exposed chest to my navel, threatening to go further. God I needed him to go further and I was actually going to let him, if it wasn’t for ‘the baby’.

“Mama I’m hungry,” Lucas whined as he pushed our door open.

John groaned and buried his head in the crook of my neck, his chest on top of mine so Lucas couldn’t see anything. “Lucas go to the kitchen, we’ll be out in five minutes, okay?”

“Five minutes?” I scoffed lightly to John.

“Half an hour-“

“We’ll be out in a second bub.” I called. “Just let mommy and daddy get ready.”

“Okay.” Lucas pouted, before walking away, leaving the door wipe open. Apparently privacy wasn’t a thing in this house anymore.

John just looked at me. “Are you serious?”

I rolled my eyes and pushed him off of me. “He’s awake, so yeah, I am.” I climbed out of bed, quickly making my way into the bathroom and closing the door behind me. It was no longer dark because it was morning, meaning it was easier for him to see the weight I’d been losing. I didn’t want that. The medication I was taking was pushing my weight all over the place and it was starting to tire me out. John hadn’t really noticed when he had his hands on me which I was glad for- it just meant I had to keep doing whatever it was that I was doing so that he wouldn’t notice.

I took a quick shower, avoiding the bathroom mirror at all costs before entering our bedroom and walking straight over to the closet. I could hear John’s voice from the kitchen, talking to Lucas as they made breakfast and it brought a smile to my lips as I chose something to wear. It also took my mind off of my body for a split second. But of course, as I noticed the room in my skinny jeans, I was only reminded once more about how much weight I’d lost. I’d gone down to a size 2. After I’d had a child. I was almost angry that the possibility of becoming a size 2 existed.

I tried my best to push those thoughts out of my mind as I finished getting ready before I walked down
the hall into the kitchen, greeting my little boy with a hug. “Hey baby, did you sleep okay?” I asked, kissing his cheek.

He looked up at me and smiled widely. “Yup!”

“That’s good Lucas.” I praised, moving around John in the kitchen for a coffee. “You’re a big boy now, sleeping in your own bed.”

“I like s-sleeping with you, mam-ma.” Lucas pouted as he munched on his peanut butter covered toast.

“You’re getting too big for that,” John stated, “big boys sleep in their big boy beds.”

“But I m-miss you.” Lucas whined.

John pulled a face and sat beside him, sipping on his coffee. “There’s not always going to be room for you Luke, when you get bigger it’ll get smaller.”

“Ok-kay,” Lucas sighed dramatically, resting his head on John’s arm.

“What time are you going into the studio?” I asked as I took a sip of my coffee, looking over at John.

“’Bout twelve.” John shrugged, looking up at me. “I’ll drop him off later then you pick him up. It’s not gonna be a long day so I should be home by six.”

I nodded. “I can do that.”

“You got a busy day?” John mumbled, looking down at a back issue of the Rolling Stone in front of him.

He didn’t really sound interested as he flipped mindlessly through the magazine, so I didn’t bother going into detail.

“Yeah, a lot of new line stuff. Anyway, I should get going. I’ll see you two later, okay?” I spoke quickly as I downed the rest of my coffee. I made my way around the bench, leaning down to kiss Lucas. “Be good for daddy, you hear me?”

Lucas nodded with a smile. “Y-yes mama.”

“Good boy,” I cooed, ruffling his hair. “I’ll see you later babe.” I murmured, kissing John’s cheek softly.

“Give me a real kiss.” John complained, looking up at me.

I rolled my eyes playfully and kissed him on the lips. His hands moved to my hips and his tongue pushed through my teeth, begging to be let in. I pulled away and sent him a look, before looking over at Lucas, who was staring at us. “John.” I warned.

John looked at Lucas, before pulling a face at me. “Oh come on-”

“Dada can we watch Ba-bam-bi again?”

***

I got to work first, unlocking the doors and closing them quickly behind me as not to let the warm air in once I switched on the air conditioners. I made my way to my office, putting my things down before switching on the lights. It was going to be a long day of explaining things with Caleb and Tate, and talking to the team about the new changes this would leave. It would also mean we’d have to hire new graphic design interns, but maybe the new meat around here would do us some good.
It wasn’t long before the others rocked up, excited and fresh-faced to start the day. Well, all except Elijah. He looked at me with a blank expression, clearly not pleased with the decisions made regarding his future.

“How are we all doing?” I asked as I left my office, iPad in hand.

“Well-recovered.” Tate nodded, giving me a thumbs up.

“Yeah it was a good party,” Lennon added, “apart from the bit where those two had that marriage break down.”

“Everyone didn’t see that did they?” I frowned as I dragged the dry-ease white board over in front of the meeting table.

“A lot of people heard about it,” Layla commented. “It was pretty loud- plus Tim was freaking out.”

“Shit,” I murmured.

“Jac filled you in, right?” Tate assumed, sending me a questioning look.

I nodded slowly. “Yeah…anyway, let’s not talk about that. We’ve got a lot to get through this morning
with the new positions and new lines coming out.”
We pushed into the meeting and it was hard to focus on the positive side of the changes when I had a pair of eyes burning holes in the side of my head. Elijah was extremely unhappy with what was going down and I was not looking forward to the damage control.

I got through the important parts, but the lingering eyes were putting me on edge. “And so Caleb, you’ll be moving into the other empty office but you’ll be splitting it with Tate, so-“

“So I’ll be the only one on the team without an office, pretty much.” Elijah retorted.

“That’s not what I’m saying,” I began, but was cut off again.

“Whatever, it’s your decision.” He shrugged, crossing his arms. “Clearly the more valuable designers get offices and promotions raises- I mean screw how long you’ve been working here, right? Screw loyalty.”

“Elijah,” I snapped, noticing Caleb’s mood drop. He deserved this promotion and he didn’t deserve to feel like shit over it. It wasn’t fair on him. I wasn’t going to let competitive jealousy ruin it for him.

“What?” Elijah scoffed. “He’s been here three years- I’ve been here just as long as you have. I have way more-“

“Elijah!” I yelled, “My office. Now.” I felt like a school teacher but I didn’t care. Openly expressing his feelings right in front of Caleb to make him feel like shit was not professional behaviour.

Elijah rolled his eyes and stood, stalking off towards my office.

“So, the office will be ready by the end of the week.” I explained, trying to ignore what just happened. It sucked seeing Caleb upset over this. He wasn’t even looking up anymore, just staring down at his hands. “We’re going to be looking at hiring new designers to fulfil the D&G team under Elijah-“

“What, so he’s taking over my position?” Tate asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Potentially, yes.” I nodded. “Anyway, I need to go speak with him. Caleb I want to see you after I see
him, okay?”

Caleb nodded. “Yeah. Sure.”

I sighed. “Okay guys, get to work. We’ve got a lot of stuff to get through, not to mention the orders are piling up.”

“Don’t worry ‘bout a thing Lei.” Jack nodded, standing with Layla. “We’ve got it.”

I sent them all an appreciative look before heading to my office, giving Caleb a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. When I got to my office, I slammed the door behind me and stood behind my desk, so I was in front of Elijah.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” I snapped, leaning down on my desk.

He looked up at me. “You know exactly.” He spat.

“You’re mad at me because you didn’t get the promotion? It was never guaranteed yours, Elijah!” I stressed, sitting in my chair. “Don’t act like you’ve been betrayed because Caleb deserves this as much as anyone.”

“I’ve been here longer!” Elijah snapped back at me, waving his hands about. “This is totally unfair- not to mention humiliating! This is what I’ve been working towards- this is my career! Yet you give it away to some kid who hasn’t even been working here that long?!”

“He has more potential to take this different line on board, it requires more intricate designs and a lot of line work- you’re better at the basic band merchandising and typography. That’s not his strong point.” I stated clearly, trying to calm him down. “It’s about pulling out your strengths!”

“What about the fact that I have more experience?! You’re letting a child do a grown man’s job! The idiot had a shotgun wedding for gods’ sake!” Elijah scoffed. “He’s earning enough money as it is- I could use this Lei and you know that!”

“First of all, I won’t have you talking about him like that,” I seethed, now standing. “Secondly, it’s not at all about the money! Your private issues are your own business, as are his and you won’t be using his personal decisions against him- if you have a problem with any of this, you’ll be speaking to Tim about it, do you understand me?!” I didn’t mean to yell, but god did it feel good.

“You’ve really fucking lost your mind.” Elijah scoffed rudely. And with that, he stood and stormed out of my office.

“Elijah!” I called angrily, following him out. I stopped at my office door and watched as he grabbed his bag, heading for the front doors. “If you leave this warehouse, don’t expect to be coming back.” I threatened, silencing the entire office.

He turned and sent me the coldest stare. “I’m speaking to Tim about this.” He retorted, before storming out.

I cringed as the door slammed behind him. I sighed and looked up to see everybody looking at me.

“I’ll go speak to him.” Lennon stated firmly, heading out after him.

“Len-“

“No Leighton, you don’t deserve to be spoken to like that, boss or not, he needs more fucking respect.” He muttered, walking past me and following Elijah across the parking lot.

“I’m really sorry you guys had to witness that.” I sighed, turning to everybody else. “Caleb can I speak
with you?” I asked softly, nodding towards my office. “You too, Tate.”

They both nodded and headed in to my office.

“Is there anything we should know?” Jack asked as he sat beside Layla at their desk from their side of the warehouse.

“Strictly D&G. We’ll discuss work ethics later.” I mused, before heading into my office, closing the door behind me. Tate and Caleb were sitting on the couch so I pulled a chair over and sat in front of them.

Tate had her arm around Caleb’s shoulders, who was trying hard to keep it together. “Caleb…” I murmured.

“Fuck he’s right Leighton, he deserves this more than I do.” Caleb muttered to himself. “I’m just a-“

“Wait you guys could hear us?” I frowned, cutting him off.

“These walls aren’t exactly sound proof, Lei.” Tate pointed out.

I winced. “He’s wrong, Caleb, nothing he said is true. He’s just angry because he’s been here longer and he needs the money. You guys know what happened with his ex, right?”

“Yeah of course, it made the Arizona paper.” Caleb scoffed. “That bitch took all of his money.”

“He thinks that the position should have gone to him. It’s nothing personally against you Caleb, he just seems cheated.” I shrugged. “I don’t want this to put you off.”

“Well it does, Leighton. He has been here longer than me.” Caleb sighed.

“It’s not about that, you’ve got more skills with intricate designs.” I pushed.

“She’s right Caleb. There’s no conflict of interest when it comes to Leighton. Trust me, I know that.” She said firmly. “It was also Tim’s decision.”

I decided not to share the fact that Tim wanted the job to go to Elijah. “I know this is going to put a rift between you guys and him, but please don’t take it personally. Just go on with your jobs and let me handle this. You will get an apology, Caleb.” I added.

“Don’t worry about it,” Caleb said as they stood. “I get it.”

“No, that’s not good enough.” I scoffed, shaking my head. “This is your work place, you deserve better.”

He sent me a small smile and gave me a hug on the way out. Tate sent me a reassuring smile as she followed him out. I felt a little better about the situation- that was until my office phone started blaring, pulling me out of my slightly better mood. I groaned and walked over to my desk, lifting the phone and answering professionally.

“Leighton? Why do I have one of your employees sitting in my office?” Tim snapped at me.

I frowned, taken back by his attitude. “Because he stormed out after he went off at me about Caleb’s promotion, that’s why.” I looked out of my office to see Lennon talking with Caleb. I guess his talking didn’t go through.

“Okay so why is he telling me that you threatened to fire him? You told him to speak with me if he had any issues and that’s what he’s doing. You have absolutely no right to make that call, neither a threat.” Tim hissed. Woa, he was mad at me?

“Tim-“

“I’m disappointed, Lei. I thought you had better work ethic than that.” Tim sighed. “I want you to see me before you leave. We need to talk.”

I couldn’t fucking believe it.

***

3 PM rolled around slowly but I didn’t feel like socialising, so I headed out for lunch alone. I told the team I’d be back shortly before heading out to the parking lot to my car. I went to Jimmy John’s and grabbed mine and John’s usuals before heading to their studio. It was connected to the main 8123 building so I’d have to try as hard as possible to remain unseen by Tim. I was not in the mood to speak with him right now. He was more than my boss- we were partners in this thing. My best intentions for this company mirrored his so I don’t know why he was taking everything out on me. He was also one of my closest friends so hearing his words thoroughly hurt me.

When I got to the offices, I walked through and headed in the opposite direction of his office, going straight for the studio. I stopped and knocked on the open door, greeted politely by the guys.

“Hey darlin’, what’s up?” John asked as he stood, putting his guitar down and walking over to me.

“I uh, kind of wanted to talk to you. I got you lunch too.” I mumbled, my eyes on his chest in front of me.

“I came in at twelve. I had lunch with Luke.” John reminded me.

I frowned. “Oh okay, that’s alright.”

John studied my expression, before turning to the guys. “Half an hour?”

“Yeah it’s cool man. I gotta run this guitar across the street anyway.” Kennedy said as he stood with his guitar. “We could all take a break.”

John threw a thanks over his shoulder before allowing me to pull him out through the front exit. “Is everything okay?”

“Not really,” I mumbled as we stopped at his truck. He put the back door down and we sat on the end of the tray, the Jimmy John’s between us. I gave him his sub while picking at the wrapping on mine.

“You gonna tell me darlin’?” He asked softly, taking a bite. “Shit this is good.”

I chuckled a little, swiping at the mayonnaise on his chin with my thumb. “You hungry?”

He nodded. “I think it’s the medication fucking around with my metabolism.”

I frowned, my attempt at a good mood coming down. I knew exactly how that felt. I had a feeling my own metabolism was fucking me around.

“C’mon, tell me why you wanted to talk.” John sighed, rubbing my back with his free hand. “I know it’s serious if you’re pulling me out of the studio.”

I sighed, exhaling my bad thoughts. “Tim wants to see me this afternoon to discuss my ‘work ethic’ regarding an argument between me and one of my designers. I was calling him out on his shit and he went to Tim about what we were arguing about.”

“And Tim thinks you weren’t being professional enough?” John frowned. “That doesn’t sound at all like what he said the other night.”

I shrugged. “That doesn’t matter- it’s clearly what he thinks now.”

“Was it Caleb? Is he being a shit to you?” John asked defensively. “What happened, Lei?” He asked, with more attitude. Not towards me, just in general.

“It wasn’t Caleb. And what happened isn’t important, it’s the whole Tim being disappointed in me part that I’m freaking out over.” I mumbled, my throat shaking as I left my untouched sandwich beside me, wrapping my arms around my waist. “I hate this feeling, John.” I whimpered.

I heard him sigh beside me. “Don’t cry…” He mumbled, pulling me into his chest.

“I thought I was doing good at this.” I sniffed, shaking my head.

“You are Leighton- do you want me to talk to Tim about this? What do you want me to do?” He asked softly.

“Nothing, I don’t want you to get involved, I just wanted to talk.” I said, breathing deeply. “I just needed you. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pull you out of the studio for this-“

“Hey,” John mumbled firmly. “If you ever need me, and even if I’m on stage, I will drop what I’m doing and come to you.” He said seriously, looking me in the eye. “Because that’s just what you do for your wife. You understand?”

“I-I’m not your wife though.” I hiccupped, wiping my eyes and trying not to smudge my eye make up.

“No, but you will be one day, babe.” He murmured. “Maybe this is practice.”

“Does that mean you’ll stop calling me babe and start calling me honey?” I mumbled. I really hoped not.

“Fuck no,” he laughed, shaking his head. “You’re too hot to be a ‘honey’.”

“What about when I’m old and grey?” I laughed, lifting my hand to the side of his face, using my thumb to caress his cheek.

“I’d be even greyer- it’d be a pleasure to do you when we’re that old.” He smirked, moving his hands to my hips.

“John,” I chuckled, kissing his cheek. “How is it that you’re almost thirty and still talk like a horny teenager?”

“My girl keeps me young.” He murmured into my hair as he wrapped his arms around my frame. “I love you Leighton.”

“I like it when you say that,” I mused, looking up and pushing his hair behind his ear. “You writing any
songs about me lover boy?” I teased.

“Always.”

***

Nerves.

So many nerves were sitting at the bottom of my stomach as I sat outside Tim’s office in the reception area. I felt like a student waiting to see the principal. I’m sure there would be just as much yelling and scolding going on. I sat on my hands to ignore the shaking but I couldn’t. My anxiety was getting the best of me, to the point where I had to down two pills to keep my heart rate on average.

It was five thirty, so I’d have to get Lucas, meaning this couldn’t take longer than twenty five minutes at the most. That was still a lot of time for-

“Leighton?”

I looked up to see Tim standing in his doorway, arms crossed. I stood and sent him a look.

“Come in.” He sighed, heading back into his office. I followed him in and shut the door. I just wanted to get this over.

“So are you going to yell at me now?” I muttered as I sat in front of his desk.

“Leighton, this is serious,” Tim warned as he took a seat in front of me. “Tell me what happened this morning.”

I sighed, sitting forward. This was my career and right now I was talking to Tim, my boss. Not Tim, my friend. I had to take this seriously. “We were having our weekly meeting and I was addressing the changes with the offices and the positions. Elijah started spitting out some shit about ‘valuable employees’ and how he had more experience right in front of Caleb. I gave him a warning but he kept going so I sent him to my office.” I began, running a hand through my hair.

“Then you had a fight?” Tim nodded.

I shook my head. “It wasn’t a fight. It was an argument- completely professional on my behalf, I swear
to you. He went off at me saying he’s been here longer and he was cussing at me and just fighting me on the fact that I thought Caleb had more potential.”

“You told him that?” Tim frowned.

“In the sense that we’re drawing on people’s strengths here.” I said quickly, as if to reassure him.

He sat back in his office chair, pondering over what I’d just said. “He did admit that he was out of line with the way he spoke to you, but he told me he felt betrayed over the position going to Caleb. Elijah thinks Caleb isn’t responsible enough to take this on.”

“I disagree with him.” I stated confidently. “With Tate and Caleb moving up, this pushes Elijah up to
head of G&D, but I don’t think he deserves it anymore.” I admitted.

Tim looked at me. “So what, do you propose we fire him?” He asked, the attitude returning.

It took a lot not to roll my eyes at him. “I got caught up in the moment, Tim. I wasn’t okay with how he was speaking to me. Just about everyone heard him.”

Tim let out a frustrated sigh. “Unfortunately Lei, you’re going to come across differences like that but you cannot threaten to fire him. Not in this company and not with me as your boss. You have no say in who gets fired unless I bring it up with you, do you understand?”

“He kept-“

“Leighton.” Tim warned.

“Yeah,” I nodded, running a hand through my hair. “Okay.”

“I spoke with him about his new position and he told me he was approached by a few other agencies. You better sort this out tomorrow, okay? We can’t lose him if we need him to lead three new designers.”
Tim stated, rubbing the back of his neck.

My eyes widened. “Three?!”

“It’s what we need, Lei.” Tim insisted. “I’ll come by on Friday and we’ll go through resumes to prepare for interviews. In the meantime, you focus on repairing things with Elijah. I’m putting him on probation for the way he acted because I do agree, it was out of line and you deserve better.”

“Thank you,” I responded smugly, crossing my arms. “Do I get an apology from you also for yelling at me on the phone?” I challenged.

He let out a laugh. “God, John must have trouble keeping up with you sometimes.”

I bit on my lower lip to stop from smirking. “Apology accepted,” I declared as I stood from the chair. “I’ve gotta go and pick up Lucas.”

“Yeah no worries,” Tim nodded, standing and walking me to his door. “I am sorry, Leighton. I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat before I knew what was going on.”

“It’s okay, boss man. I know I’ll probably do the same to you in the future,” I chuckled, giving him a hug. “We just have to stick together with these things.” I mused.

“Exactly right,” Tim sighed, patting my back as we pulled away. “Now go. I’ll see you Friday, okay? Let me know how tomorrow goes.”

“Will do, boss.” I called, waving goodbye as I headed out to my car. The boys’ cars were nowhere to be seen so I assumed they’d all gone home by now. I sent John a message telling him I was on my way home, before getting into my car and driving to the O’Callaghan’s home. I was feeling better after that talk with Tim, especially now that everything was clear and understood. I wasn’t looking forward to speaking with Elijah tomorrow but for now, I was going to leave that out of my mind and just calm down. All I wanted right now was Lucas and John. No more work dramas.

I arrived at the O’Callaghan’s family home about fifteen minutes later, turning off the engine and climbing out. Making my way up to the front door, I knocked and stood back. John usually walked right in because he still had a key, but I preferred to use manners when I came here alone.

Jenny answered the door a few seconds later, greeting me with a hug and a smile. “Hello sweetheart, come on in.”

“How was he today?” I asked as I followed her through to the kitchen. “I hope he wasn’t a pain.”

“Of course not,” Jenny tutted, “he was nothing but a pleasure, as always. He had a nap this afternoon at two, he was quite tired after Jay and I took him out to the park.”

“Any sweets I should be aware of?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at her. It wasn’t unusual for Jenny to spoil Lucas rotten. I was surprised his teeth hadn’t gone yellow or fallen out.

“Not today,” Jenny chuckled, leading me into the living room where I found Lucas laying on the couch watching TV. “Lucas darling, look who’s here.”

Lucas looked up and beamed, jumping off of the couch and running towards me. He stumbled a little but I caught him just before he fell. “Mama!”

“Hey baby,” I cooed, pressing my lips firmly across his cheek. “I heard you went to the park, huh?”

“Yup! I had so much f-fun mama!” He giggled, wrapping his arms around my neck.

“That’s good bub, shall we get you home to daddy?” I asked, kissing the side of his face.

“Yes I miss d-daddy.” Lucas pouted.

“So does mommy,” I chuckled, letting him lean across to kiss Jenny and say goodbye. “Thank you so much for looking after him today.” I added as we walked to the front door. “John and I really appreciate.”

“It’s not a problem, darling,” she insisted. “However, I won’t be able to look after him tomorrow, I’ve got a few things on with Shane’s party.”

Shit.

I assured her it was okay and said our goodbyes before we headed out to my car. I strapped Lucas in and got into the drivers’ seat, waving to Jenny as we started the drive home. Who was I going to get to babysit Lucas tomorrow? I’d love to take my baby boy in with me and spend the day with him, but not when I had things to deal with Elijah and Caleb. I didn’t want to subject him to that in case it got ugly so I’d have to persuade John into taking him.

The drive home was uneventful, apart from the constant chattering provided by Lucas. I loved talking to him during car rides- I loved talking to him period. He was so full of life for a little guy that’d only lived three years. He’d been lucky to experience and see so many things a normal three year old wouldn’t see until they were much older.

We got home a few minutes later and I was surprised to find John in the kitchen cooking dinner.

“We’re home babe.” I called out, Lucas in my arms and both our bags in my hands.

John came around the kitchen bench to greet us. “Hey guys.” He cooed, lifting Lucas into his arms and kissing his cheek. “Hey bub were you good for grandma?”

“Y-yeah,” Lucas giggled, wrapping his arms around John’s neck.

“And how was the rest of mama’s day?” John asked, leaning down to kiss me on the lips.

“It turned out okay,” I nodded, running a hand through his hair. “I’m doing much better.”

“That’s really good to hear, bub. I was worrying about you in the studio.” He admitted, leaning down to kiss me again before setting Lucas down to run off. “I figured you’d be exhausted so I started on dinner. How do you feel about bolognese?”

“Oh god that’d be perfect.” I whined, wrapping my arms around him. “I can’t wait to unwind tonight.”

“Good, I want you to relax.” He nodded, rubbing circles on my back, before tugging on the strap of my
top to replace the material with his lips.

“John…” I murmured.

“Hmm?” He mumbled, his hands moving up my shirt.

“John don’t start something we can’t finish until later…” I groaned, tugging back on his hair.

“Woa, wait a sec,” he frowned, pulling me back a little and lifting my shirt to my neck.

“John!” I snapped, pulling my shirt back down. “Do you mind?!”

“Is it just me or did your boobs get smaller?” He mumbled more so to himself.

Now it was my turn to frown. “Excuse me?”

“They feel…smaller.” He spoke, looking up at me.

“You’re such a pervert.” I laughed, shoving him. “They didn’t get smaller.”

“Oh don’t get me wrong, I love them, they just…I don’t know, they’re not as full as they used to be.” He shrugged, kissing me again. “Forget I said anything, I’m probably just going crazy.”

“Yeah, I think you are.” I chuckled, feeling my walls of confidence come crumbling down. Was he
starting to notice me lose weight? Was he noticing it before I was? I didn’t think you could lose weight in your chest area until you had nowhere else to lose it from- meaning I clearly had nowhere else to lose it from.

I really needed to get a grip on my weight, or else I could be loosing a lot more than boobs.