We Are an Example of Why Not to Fall in Love

Oli’s point of view:

“Hey,” I greet my three friends as I sit at the lunch table with them. They greet me back, and I can’t help but notice how close Jack and Alex seem to be. “You guys going on strong again then?”

They nod, making me smile as I cuddle into Josh’s side. I look up at him and see him staring at something else. I follow his gaze and see the group of girls who tormented me a month ago, one of them watching us. I could see how jealous she was.

“You alright, Joshie?” I ask, gaining his attention again. He smiles at me and kisses my nose.

“Of course I am!” he adds, wrapping an arm around my waist. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know, just making sure.”

“Anyways, you guys have plans for this weekend?” Jack asks hopefully.

“I don’t,” Josh answers, so Jack turns to me. I shake my head.

“Cool! So, do you guys wanna have a sleepover at my house? I’m inviting someone not even Alex knows yet!”

Josh and I agree to come over, and we all settle for this Saturday. I even asked if Tom could tag along with me since I haven’t spent quite as much time with him on the weekends lately, and Jack had said that it’s fine. We just talked about our plans until the bell rang, alerting us that we have five minutes to get back to class. Jack and Alex said bye to us and hurried off to whatever classes they had. Jack and I get up too, and he gives me a kiss before saying bye and leaving himself.

Something about that kiss gave me a bad feeling in my stomach…

<><><>

Josh’s point of view:

The second I got home, my phone alerted me of a text. I decided to ignore it for now. I really needed to work on a project I had forgotten all about. It’s due at the end of the week, and I’ve been procrastinating this whole month. If I fail this project, I fail the class. I fail the class, I get grounded big time. I get grounded big time, I die. I die.., I don’t know what happens if I die.

Whoever it is that’s texting me obviously approves of me dying as they just simply send me another text. I groan and pull my phone out of my pocket, reading it.

Rachelle: josh i miss u

Whoa.

Is my plan really coming to an end? Am I ready for it too?

Of course you are! You’re finally getting her back!

But what about Oli?

He’ll be just fine! He’s beautiful on the inside and the out too. He’ll find someone else.

Yeah, he will. He’ll be fine.

me: Oh, really?

Rachelle: yes a lot

me: Well, I miss you too :)

Rachelle: but u have oli. r u gonna leave him or somthin

me: Maybe… Why should I pick you over him?

Rachelle: well ill blow you as a reward unless you want more ;)

me: But I can always get Oli to…

Rachelle: has he let u fuck him yet

me: No

Rachelle: exactly. ill b here whenevr u want me ;) so how about it

me: I’ll tell Oli the news

Rachelle: i love you <3

me: I love you too <3 txt me after

Something was screaming and begging me not to carry on with this any further, but I ignored it as I quickly sent Oli a text telling him that I had to tell him something so he should come over.

After a few minutes, I hear a knock at the door. Before I can get up to answer it, I hear my mom shout that she’d get it. I hear a couple voices exchange words before footsteps making their way upstairs. I watch as Oli pushes the door open and carefully sits on the bed next to me.

“So, uh, what did you wanna talk about?” Oli asks quietly as he avoids eye contact, slight fear and sadness heard in his voice. It’s as if he knew where this was going, and sadly, I’m pretty sure he does. I struggle to find the words to say. I really wanna put this as easy as possible, because I don’t wanna hurt him. There’s no going back now, either.

“Look, Oli, you’re a sweet kid, but I… I want Rachelle back, and… you can put the rest together. I still love you, but as a friend. We can still be friends, right?”

The look on Oli’s face is enough to make me want to tie bricks around my limbs and throw me into the ocean. It made my heart hurt, especially when the tears brim his eyes. He fights to keep them back as he puts on a smile, which is clearly fake. He nods his head, saying that we could still be friends. I’ve heard of people who said yes to that question during a breakup but walked out of their lives afterwards and never came back, but I know Oli well enough to know that he won’t do that. It may be reluctant, but he won’t leave.

“I-I gotta g-go now, bye,” Oli shakily says, voice cracking as I see a tear spill over onto his cheek. He jumps out and rushes out. I flinch when I hear the door slam shut, and I let out a shaky sigh.

God, I’m so fucked up. What the fuck is wrong with me?

Instead of texting Rachelle like I said I would, I call Elissa. She picks up almost immediately.

“Hey! What’s up?” her cheery voice speaks, but it’s not enough to make me feel better.

“Hey, I fucked up big time.”