Let the Flames Begin

It took all night to find Jer. Eventally we did. In some run down house after walking around yelling his name for two hours. I don't know if she was just scared of me or what but when he ran to he window and began slamming his hands I knew where he was. I just simply walked in, looked at her she looked at me and just backed away and Jer, Hayles and I were on our way home.

"You're stupid you know that? Why the hell did you choose that idiot over the billions of people in the world."

"Because, she was hot. Duh. When we left i thought I might be getting some that's why I complied. Then it was pure torture. I was tied up and getting the shit slapped out of me until she decided to free me of my restraints."

"Dumby." Hayley muttered shaking her head.

We dropped him off at this house and reminded him if that psycho arrived he was to call the cops immediately. I drove Hayley and I home. Poor thing was exhausted. And scared. She was scared that something else might happen to Jer, let alone us. Granted, I wouldn't let anything happen to us but still, she was a worry-wort.

"Carrie.."

"Hmmm." I said turning the engine off.

"I love you, so much..I'm sorry I was so...uptight all night."

"You act like I'm angry with you or something."

"Well, aren't you. You've been so...distant all night."

"No. No, I'm not mad. I'm fine. I love you. That's all that matters okay?" I said opening the door. Hayley followed me inside and upstairs to the bedroom. She barely got undressed before she passed out. I laid on the bed beside her, she was cuddling up beside me so I'd hold her in her sleep. I had my old lyric book out full of songs that I'd wrote about how I'd felt about Hayley years ago.

See, here's what a lot of people who meet me don't realize. Growing up here, Paramore wasn't the only band around that was starting to get big. I was also in a band, and those memories are some of my favorites. We were just a group of friends who honestly had no intention of trying to make it big. We just wrote and performed because it's what we wanted to do. We didn't care about the money or fame we cared about making everyone around us happy. Then, I met Hayley and that's when I guess you could say I caused the band to go in a downward spiral. I fell hard and fast for Hayley but didn't let my feelings be known for the longest time. I've known I was a lesbian since I was thirteen so to fall in love when you're barely out of high school is beyond any teenagers worst nightmare. It changes everything about you. You're style, you're personality, your laugh, what brings you up and what brings you down. You form into a whole new side of yourself you didn't even know existed.

The next morning, Hayley woke me up with a soft, long, drawn out kiss. I was sweet, yet full of passion.

"Good morning love." she whispered laying back down beside me.

"Good morning yourself hot stuff." I rolled over to look at her. This is when she looked her best by far. When she didn't have a chance to fix her hair or add five hundred pounds of make up to her face.

"Glad you're up finally. As creepy as it sounds I've been watching you sleep for almost an hour now. You're so innocent when you're asleep."

"Yeah, well, I'm not so innocent when I'm conscious." I stretched making myself sit up.

"What the hell does that mean?" the look on her face made me laugh so hard I pretty much cried.

"It means, when you're lucky and ready enough to find out, you will. That's only if, when that time comes, you want to."

"Want to what?"

"Oh god. I keep forgetting that this is new to you." I said looking over at her.

"OH! OH! oh god. We can actually do things like that?"

"Well, duh. We can do anything we want to Hayley."

She looked nervous, scared almost.

"I'm not going to make you do a single thing you don't want to. If you don't want to sleep with me than that's fine. I can live the rest of my life saying I never once slept with you and be perfectly happy hayles."

"Nu-uh. Everyone wants to sleep with someone at some point. Especially when you're deemed famous." the last part was almost a whisper, a sad one at that. I sat on the bed and lifted her chin.

"Darlin', I'm with you or your personality and how you complete me as a person, not because you make amazing music and tons of fans happy. I've been in your shoes. I've toured the country Hayley. I know what it's like. Hell, theres probably people out there who see my name on the records I make and think of me as some famous person. Don't you think for two seconds I'm with you for the fame. I'm with you for the pure simple fact that I love you, and I'm in love with you no matter what."

She rolled her eyes, but she smiled that big goofy smile of hers.

"There we go babygirl. That's the face I want to see all the time."