If You Tell Me to Stay, I Will Stay Right Through

“Okay so how do we know she’s here?” whispered Johnny as he stuck his head between mine and Matt’s seat. We had situated ourselves across the street from someone’s house. I was still as confused as Johnny was so I quickly glanced at Matt to see what he had to say. We had been waiting a while.

“Well first of all, why the fuck are you whispering? No one can hear you outside of this car. Second, I’ve had a hunch that she’s been cheating on me with Justin, you know, that guy that’s on Deftone’s stage crew?” Matt explained turning to look at the guys in the back seat.

There was a series of murmured “yeahs” and an “I knew it” from Brian.

“It doesn’t seem like anyone is home,” I added as peered through my window. I jumped slightly as I felt Matt’s warm breath close to my cheek as he too leaned toward my window to take a look. I cleared my throat awkwardly but he didn’t seem to notice.

“Okay Short Shit, you need to sit on someone else’s lap, you’re fucking heavy,” complained Jimmy as he shoved him onto Brian’s lap.

“Fuck that, sit on Zack’s lap,” Brian glared as he too tried to shove him off. “So are we leaving since no one is home?”

Matt sighed, “This is why I didn’t want to bring you fuckers.”

“Actually, it is better that they’re not home right now. It gives us an advantage,” I found myself saying. I mentally slapped the shit out of myself.

I felt all of their eyes on me. I refused to look at them.

“How the hell does that give us an advantage?” asked Brian as he leaned forward and rested his head on the shoulder of my seat.

I cleared my throat again, “Well if they were home, what would we do? Peek through each window?

No, it’s better that they aren’t home because they have to get out of whatever vehicle to get inside the house. We get a good visual without having to stalk their windows. You know what I mean?”

“Hm, you’re good at this,” Matt stated as he nodded his head thoughtfully.

“Did you do this to an ex-boyfriend? Wait, do you have a boyfriend? Come to think of it, we know nothing about you,” Zacky rambled.

“No to both of your questions,” I answered simply not want to elaborate.

“Okaayyyy, but tell us about yourself,” Zack pressed on.

“There’s not much to it really. I’m from Texas, I’m 24, and I’m in college.”

“You’re shy,” Jimmy said grinning at me through the rearview mirror. “I love shy people. We’re gonna get along great Nat.”

All the guys snickered, obviously there was a hidden meaning behind it.

“I have a question,” Brian piped in. Oh, great. “Are you a serial killer? Ax murderer? Or anything that has to with psycho?”

“Um absolutely not,” I answered looking back at him. He grinned.

“What kind of music do you like Natalie?” asked Matt as he put his back to his door to completely face me.

“I like-oh look I think they’re home!” I said as we watched a car slow down and pull into their driveway. Everyone got quiet.

“It’s too dark to see anything,” mumbled Zack. He was right. I squinted as I tried to adjust my eyes to dark driveway.

“Natalie, she doesn’t know you. Please go out there and try to get a better look. Please, I wouldn’t be asking if it wasn’t important,” Matt pleaded as he grabbed a hold up my hand and squeezed it.

He looked so sad, how could I say no?

“Fine,” I said as I grabbed my phone and stepped out quietly. I decided to pretend to be a night jogger.

I had lied, I had done this before just not to an ex-boyfriend.

I took off on a slow jog, they caught sight of me but shrugged me off, I could see a tall blonde and a guy as tall as Jimmy. I noticed they were holding hands and had stopped at the front door.

I pulled out my phone and kneeled behind some pushes. I hit record.

The blonde giggled at whatever the guy had whispered in her ear. And then they kissed. Okay not kissed more like ate each other’s faces off. I decided that was enough evidence and hurried back to the car.

The guys were all staring at me wide-eyed.

“What??” I asked throwing my hands up.

“You’re way too good at this,” Johnny whispered.

I rolled my eyes and handed Matt my phone.

He pressed play and watched as his wife kissed another man, his face drooping to a frown. The guys all peeking over his shoulder.

“Alright, let’s head home,” he stated in a deep demanding voice. It was almost scary.

He was pissed and trying to contain it.

I drove us to his house and pulled up to the driveway.

“You coming Nat?” asked Jimmy as he stepped out.

“Nah I’m heading home, I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” I smiled softly at him.

He nodded and they all waved their goodbyes, except Matt who was still in the passenger’s seat sitting quietly.

“I’m sorry about your wife,” I offered quietly. He simply nodded and looked straight ahead.

“Don’t forget about the confidentiality agreement. Don’t tell anyone what you saw,” He turned to me, his lips in a tight line.

I nodded. “And thanks for what you did. You really helped me out today.” He grabbed my hand and squeezed it before bringing it to his lips. He didn’t kiss my hand just simply held it up to his lips, causing me to shudder. He looked at me once more, before stepping out of my car and heading inside.

I sighed deeply. This guy was definitely at war with himself. He can’t really turn to his friends because they clearly love his wife almost as much as he did. He really didn’t have anyone right now. At least that’s what it seemed like. Maybe now that his friends had seen what she was doing behind his back, they would cut ties with her and be there for the person that really needed it, which was Matt.

I headed home, knowing I would hit the pillow as soon as I walked into my dorm.

As soon as I laid down my phone started going off.

I groaned and reached for it and mumbled a “hello.”

“Natalie,” his familiar deep, raspy voice came through the speaker.

I sat up quickly, “Matt?”

“Sorry I should’ve known you were going to be pretty tired and head to bed, I’ll just talk to you tomorrow when you come in for work, goodnight,” He said and hung up before I could say anything.

That was weird.

I lay in bed thinking about the situation, I couldn’t help but feel bad for him.

The next day, I woke up bright and early again. I decided to wear a v-neck tee and my most comfortable skinny jeans and some converse. I let my hair down and straightened it. Once I was decent I headed to Matt’s.

He was obviously still asleep since all the lights were off as I drove up.

I reached for the living room light switch and froze. There he was, sitting in the same clothes he had worn the day before. Lack of sleep made his eyes droop down on the sides, or had he been crying?

He looked up at me sadly.

“Hey,” his voice raspier than usual.

“Good morning,” I greeted. “Breakfast and coffee?”

“Please,” He smiled softly before turning away from me.

Poor guy, I wish there was something I could do to make him feel better. I quickly cooked up some eggs, bacon, and French toast.

I walked back to the living room, finding him in the same exact position.

“Matt, breakfast is ready,” I announced.

“Can’t you just bring it in here?” He asked looking up at me.

“No. You’ll get crumbs everywhere,” I responded. Really, that wasn’t the case. I just knew it would be better to get him to move around a little.

He raised his eyebrows in amusement. He saluted me then stood and stretched. “Lead the way ma’am,” He said grinning. The grin didn’t reach his eyes, but it was a start.

He ate quietly as I cleaned up where I had cooked.

I felt eyes on my back and turned to find him staring at me, his plate clean.

“Hey Natalie, about last night, thanks again for helping me out. I really do appreciate it,” He said softly.

“No problem,” I said to him before turning my back to him to keep cleaning. The way he looked at made me so self-conscious. I looked down at my clothes, ugh. Maybe I should start dressing up a little. No, I’m a housekeeper that would be stupid.

“Listen, where do you live? On campus right?” He asked getting my attention again.

I turned to him and nodded. “It’s only 20 minutes away,” I started saying, thinking he was about to fire me. He lifted his hand up to stop me.

“I’m not asking because I want to fire you Natalie. I’m asking because I saw your tuition statement. It costs a shit load to live there,” He pointed out. Well, he did have a point. Wait, he looked at my tuition statement? Mark must’ve shown him. Where was my confidentiality? Did it not count?

He cleared his throat and I glanced back up at him, “The reason I’m bringing it up is because I think you should live here. You know, like a live-in housekeeper? It would take a huge load off your shoulders. I would pay you more, I just really need you to stay here.” His eyes silently pleaded at me. Was he afraid to be alone? “Look, I could use the company. So could you, according to Jimmy.”

“Jimmy?”

He nodded, “He’s worried about you being alone. Says you need a tough man around to protect you,” He said with a wink.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m fine really, I don’t want to intrude your personal space,” I reasoned.

“You won’t be intruding. I’m asking for a reason. There’s more than enough space for you.”

I quickly went over this in my head. He was right, living on campus was fucking expensive.

Finally I nodded my head, “Okay.”

“Yeah? You’ll move in?” He asked sitting up. I nodded.

He grinned, “Great let’s go get all of your stuff.” He quickly stood and grabbed me by my shoulders.

Wait, what?

“Now?” I asked as he pushed to the front door.

“Yup.”

My heart dropped to my feet as I realized that if he helped me pack he would know I was an ex-cop and my secret would be out. I had pictures. I had my gun. My badge that my chief had secretly let me keep. I couldn’t have this getting out. Fuck.