When Past Comes Present
memories of hearbreak
I stood there frozen. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out.
"Mommy. Are you okay" Harmony said as she pulled on the bottom of my shirt. I cleared
my throat and smiled "Yes honey I'm okay just a little shocked" I replied honestly looking
straight at Jimmy. Unable to pull my eyes from his. I was stuck in them as I always used
to do when we was younger. I finally broke our eyes and looked at Matt hoping he could
help me. "Can you guys believe that after all these years were all standing here together"
He said smiling trying to break the awkward silence. I looked down at my feet and bit my lip.
The awkwardness was just redeating from our bodies. Neither one of us wanted to see the other
ever again. It was clear by our body language. "Jimmy" The blonde haired woman screamed
as she walked over to him and pushed her body up against his. He didnt seem to notice her.
Just kept starring at me with some amused look on his face. As if he was remembering the
cruel joke he had done to me. The way he left me standing in his yard the day I had found out
I was moving.
"So ugh Demon how about we you and Harmony go put on your swimming clothes so that way we
all can swim." he then looked at Harmony and winked "What you say little one? Wanna swim with
Uncle Brian?" He said smiling down at her. Excitement shot through her as she smiled and jumped
up and down "yes! come on mommy lets swim with Uncle Brian! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE" she begged me as she held on to Brian's leg. I couldnt tell her no. I smiled and picked her up. "Okay lets go put you bathing suit on then" I said as i smiled at Brian thanking him and made my way to the house to put on our swim clothes. I tried to gain my composure. My heart had started that familiar ache that I feel sometimes. I had always known it was associated to Jimmy. But the ache right now feels fresh. Like he had left some knew of scar on it. Hello heartache. Here comes the memories I long to forget. I thought silent as I walked in the house.
~~~~~~~~~~~Jimmy's P.O.V~~~~~~~~~~~
I had just arrived at Matt's for the cookout. He told me there was a special guest that I would
love to see. I kept ignoring LeAnna's constant nagging. Hope she leaves soon. I cant take her shit no
more. I cant wait for our divorce to be final. Then I would finally be completely free of her. I walked
into Matt's backyard. There was a childs laughter coming from somewhere. I went to look for it but then Matt had walked up to me. "Hey man about time you got here Rev. You will flip out when you find out who is here" he said to me smiling like he had found a treasure buried in his backyard. I rolled my eyes at him Matt always tried to make things seem big so he could show off. "Who is it then" I asked kinda bored like. "Your ex girlfriend from back when we was 16 or 17 yrs old man. Demonica. She even has a daughter now." I wasnt expecting what he said I took my eyes off Matt to look around thats when I had seen her. I Couldnt help but smile. She still looked just a beautiful. The little girl sitting in her lap must of been the child who I heard laughing. Matt started walking that way. I followed him quietly.
She seemed to notice me because then she started to panic and try to get up and leave. Brian had walked over and sit on her lap. I just wanted to yell at him and tell him to get off her. Next thing I know Brian stood up and held his hand out to her. As if he was helping her escape me. She surely wouldnt be trying to avoid me would she? What did I do to make her hate me? I stopped walking when we got there to here. Matt had said something to her to catch her attention. She turned around to look at us. I took of my sunglasses so that she could see it really was me. The look on her face seemed as if she was shocked and scared to see me all at once. "Well i never thought I would see your face again" I said to her. Fuck. It came out sounding rude. I didnt mean for it to sound that way. She didnt answer me just stood there starring right back at me. Her daughter grabbed the bottom of her Metallica shirt. It looked alot like the one I used to have that she took one night when I stayed at her place. "Mommy. Are you okay" she said looking up at her worried. There was something about her that made me curious. I looked back at Demon's face when I realized why she was this way. Thats when the last time she ever talked to me flashed in the back of my mind.
~Flashback~
"James" she yelled as she grabbed onto me crying into my shoulder. I had dropped my drumsticks and grabbed her tightly. "Baby what is wrong you okay Demon tell me why your crying" I said freaking out from her random fit. "my parents just t...told me where moving back to K..Kentucky" she stuttered trying to calm down looking at me with tears running down her cheeks. I stopped everything and let go of her. I had stepped back and took a deep breath "When you leaving" I asked quietly. Why am I even asking its not like it matters. She is still leaving me anyways. I got to end it so that way neither one of us suffer. But how will I do it? Oh wait. I got a idea. God Demon dont hate me forever for this. I got to do this. It is whats best for the both of us. I looked at her and quickly hid the pain from my face. As if I wasnt hurting. As if I didnt care. "I dont know" she replied to me quietly still crying. I laughed and shrugged My shoulders and smiled "Well thanks for the fun then. I guess its about time for this little thing to end then" I said walking away like it didn't bother me at all. God. How I had already regreted those words ever leaving my mouth. I love you Demon. Dont ever forget me. I thought as I walked away from her. The guys smiled and waved as they followed me inside my house. I made my way to my room and looked out my window to see her standing there shocked. Hurt. Pained. I wanted to run to her and hold her. I lost everything I had held in that very moment. I put my hand to my window as I watched her slowly walk into her house. Tears surfaced my eyes and started streaming down my cheeks " I love you Demon. I dont mean it. Dont leave me." I said out loud knowing the guys heard me but not giving a shit. I just lost my first and only love I would ever have. Forever.
~end of flashback~
There was a awkward silence Matt had said something trying to break it. But it didnt help. I couldnt say anything. I stood there starring right back into her eyes. She hated me because I was young and dumb and made her feel like she meant nothing to me out of my selfishness of not wanting to get hurt. By this time my soon to be ex wife had walked up to me and pushed her body against mine. She must of been getting jealous. Brian mentioned something about swimming to her. He then looked at the little girl. He refered himself to her as Uncle Brian. My eyes went wide. Was there something I didnt know? There is no way that I got her pregnant when we was younger. Or is there? I will have to try to talk to her about that soon.
"Mommy. Are you okay" Harmony said as she pulled on the bottom of my shirt. I cleared
my throat and smiled "Yes honey I'm okay just a little shocked" I replied honestly looking
straight at Jimmy. Unable to pull my eyes from his. I was stuck in them as I always used
to do when we was younger. I finally broke our eyes and looked at Matt hoping he could
help me. "Can you guys believe that after all these years were all standing here together"
He said smiling trying to break the awkward silence. I looked down at my feet and bit my lip.
The awkwardness was just redeating from our bodies. Neither one of us wanted to see the other
ever again. It was clear by our body language. "Jimmy" The blonde haired woman screamed
as she walked over to him and pushed her body up against his. He didnt seem to notice her.
Just kept starring at me with some amused look on his face. As if he was remembering the
cruel joke he had done to me. The way he left me standing in his yard the day I had found out
I was moving.
"So ugh Demon how about we you and Harmony go put on your swimming clothes so that way we
all can swim." he then looked at Harmony and winked "What you say little one? Wanna swim with
Uncle Brian?" He said smiling down at her. Excitement shot through her as she smiled and jumped
up and down "yes! come on mommy lets swim with Uncle Brian! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE" she begged me as she held on to Brian's leg. I couldnt tell her no. I smiled and picked her up. "Okay lets go put you bathing suit on then" I said as i smiled at Brian thanking him and made my way to the house to put on our swim clothes. I tried to gain my composure. My heart had started that familiar ache that I feel sometimes. I had always known it was associated to Jimmy. But the ache right now feels fresh. Like he had left some knew of scar on it. Hello heartache. Here comes the memories I long to forget. I thought silent as I walked in the house.
~~~~~~~~~~~Jimmy's P.O.V~~~~~~~~~~~
I had just arrived at Matt's for the cookout. He told me there was a special guest that I would
love to see. I kept ignoring LeAnna's constant nagging. Hope she leaves soon. I cant take her shit no
more. I cant wait for our divorce to be final. Then I would finally be completely free of her. I walked
into Matt's backyard. There was a childs laughter coming from somewhere. I went to look for it but then Matt had walked up to me. "Hey man about time you got here Rev. You will flip out when you find out who is here" he said to me smiling like he had found a treasure buried in his backyard. I rolled my eyes at him Matt always tried to make things seem big so he could show off. "Who is it then" I asked kinda bored like. "Your ex girlfriend from back when we was 16 or 17 yrs old man. Demonica. She even has a daughter now." I wasnt expecting what he said I took my eyes off Matt to look around thats when I had seen her. I Couldnt help but smile. She still looked just a beautiful. The little girl sitting in her lap must of been the child who I heard laughing. Matt started walking that way. I followed him quietly.
She seemed to notice me because then she started to panic and try to get up and leave. Brian had walked over and sit on her lap. I just wanted to yell at him and tell him to get off her. Next thing I know Brian stood up and held his hand out to her. As if he was helping her escape me. She surely wouldnt be trying to avoid me would she? What did I do to make her hate me? I stopped walking when we got there to here. Matt had said something to her to catch her attention. She turned around to look at us. I took of my sunglasses so that she could see it really was me. The look on her face seemed as if she was shocked and scared to see me all at once. "Well i never thought I would see your face again" I said to her. Fuck. It came out sounding rude. I didnt mean for it to sound that way. She didnt answer me just stood there starring right back at me. Her daughter grabbed the bottom of her Metallica shirt. It looked alot like the one I used to have that she took one night when I stayed at her place. "Mommy. Are you okay" she said looking up at her worried. There was something about her that made me curious. I looked back at Demon's face when I realized why she was this way. Thats when the last time she ever talked to me flashed in the back of my mind.
~Flashback~
"James" she yelled as she grabbed onto me crying into my shoulder. I had dropped my drumsticks and grabbed her tightly. "Baby what is wrong you okay Demon tell me why your crying" I said freaking out from her random fit. "my parents just t...told me where moving back to K..Kentucky" she stuttered trying to calm down looking at me with tears running down her cheeks. I stopped everything and let go of her. I had stepped back and took a deep breath "When you leaving" I asked quietly. Why am I even asking its not like it matters. She is still leaving me anyways. I got to end it so that way neither one of us suffer. But how will I do it? Oh wait. I got a idea. God Demon dont hate me forever for this. I got to do this. It is whats best for the both of us. I looked at her and quickly hid the pain from my face. As if I wasnt hurting. As if I didnt care. "I dont know" she replied to me quietly still crying. I laughed and shrugged My shoulders and smiled "Well thanks for the fun then. I guess its about time for this little thing to end then" I said walking away like it didn't bother me at all. God. How I had already regreted those words ever leaving my mouth. I love you Demon. Dont ever forget me. I thought as I walked away from her. The guys smiled and waved as they followed me inside my house. I made my way to my room and looked out my window to see her standing there shocked. Hurt. Pained. I wanted to run to her and hold her. I lost everything I had held in that very moment. I put my hand to my window as I watched her slowly walk into her house. Tears surfaced my eyes and started streaming down my cheeks " I love you Demon. I dont mean it. Dont leave me." I said out loud knowing the guys heard me but not giving a shit. I just lost my first and only love I would ever have. Forever.
~end of flashback~
There was a awkward silence Matt had said something trying to break it. But it didnt help. I couldnt say anything. I stood there starring right back into her eyes. She hated me because I was young and dumb and made her feel like she meant nothing to me out of my selfishness of not wanting to get hurt. By this time my soon to be ex wife had walked up to me and pushed her body against mine. She must of been getting jealous. Brian mentioned something about swimming to her. He then looked at the little girl. He refered himself to her as Uncle Brian. My eyes went wide. Was there something I didnt know? There is no way that I got her pregnant when we was younger. Or is there? I will have to try to talk to her about that soon.