Let Love Bleed Red

I could feel my eyes start tearing up. Great. This is just what I needed everyone to see. I wiped them and quickly made my way to our van. I knocked on the window, only to see the guys still sleeping. I knocked again. Finally, I saw Jeremy move, opening his eyes. He sighed giving me a gentle smile and opened the door, sliding over to make room for me.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked. I shook my head, wrapping myself under one of the blankets. My eyes were tearing again. I left them.
"I hate this" I managed. He sighed, wrapping his arm around me, pulling me closer.
"What happened?" He whispered, careful not to wake the rest of the guys. He knew I didn't like talking about this kind of thing with many people.
"I don't want to like him." I said, leaning my head against his shoulder. "But I do and I hate it because there's no way this could work."
"Why can't it work?" He asked. I shrugged.
"I think you're just scared to trust him, Kira."
"I am scared." He was quiet for a minute.
"He's crazy about you, Kira. Everyone can see it. If you could trust anyone, I think it's him." I wiped my eyes.
"Did he put you up to this?" I asked. He giggled.
"No, but I think at this point he definitely owes me." I couldn't help but smile. Jeremy had definitely helped numerous times.

"I just want you to be happy, Kira. Everyone deserves that. And I can tell, when you're not over thinking things, he makes you happy." I ran my fingers through my hair. He was right.
"He does.." I sighed. "I'll.. I'll talk to him later. If he even wants to talk to me." Jeremy giggled, leaning his head against mine.
"He'll want to talk to you, Kira. Trust me." I smiled.
"Thanks Jeremy." I felt him nod.

I managed to get a little more sleep before tech came knocking on the van door.
"Hey, time for sound check." He said, shutting the door behind him. I rubbed my eyes. Time to do it all over again.

"Let's go." I said, shaking Jeremy. He moaned, rolling over. I shook him again.
"Come on, we gotta go inside." I heard him sigh as he picked up his head, pushing his blanket off of him.
"Alright." He managed, now waking up the rest of the guys.

This venue was much smaller than the first. I felt somewhat better about that. These were the kinds of venues I was used to. I hopped on stage with the rest of the guys and tampered with the sound and quality for a good 25 minutes. It was then we heard loud screams from outside. My stomach dropped. I knew what that meant. In walked Justin and Kellin; Kellin kept on his dark sunglasses as he sipped his coffee. Justin walked ahead of him, almost as if blocking him. I wondered if it was in purpose. They seemed to be avoiding the stage. I did my best to ignore him. No such luck.

"I think I'm finished." I said, looking down.
"Just a few more." I heard. "And Kellin, why don't you go up, we'll try out your mic too while were at it. My stomach tightened again. Great. He hesitated, but finally took off his sunglasses and slowly made his way to the stage without a word. When he got up, he occasionally peeked over at me. I tried avoiding eye contact. Again, no such luck. I wanted to be staring into those beautiful eyes again. I had to break this awkwardness somehow.

"Are.. Are you gonna sing with us again tonight?" I asked quietly. He hesitated, but eventually looked over at me, biting his lip.
"Do you want me to?" He asked, keeping a straight face. I nodded, feeling my cheeks start to burn. He sighed, keeping his eyes on me. I held my stare back at him. I felt my heart race the longer he stared. He looked around at the guys on stage, then made his way over to me, gently taking me by the hand pulling me backstage.
"We need to talk.." He said. I followed close behind. He led me to a quiet room at the beck of the venue. I followed him inside and he shut the door behind us, locking it.
"Yes?" I asked, turning around to face him. He was already staring back at me. My heart started to race again. I loved when he stared at me. He was so beautiful. I could stare at him all day.

"What's going on with us, Kira?" He asked. I bit my lip, crossing my arms now leaning against the wall.
"I don't know.." I whispered, looking down at my feet. I heard him sigh as he made his way over to me. I peeked up at him only to have him inches from my face. My eyes moved from his, to his lips, back up to those beautiful eyes.
"I want to be with you.." I finally said. I saw his eyes widen, he was quiet for a minute.
"Then what's the problem?" He asked. I shrugged, looking down again.
"I'm scared."
"What are you scared of?" He asked.
"You. This. I've.. I've never felt this. And I don't think I could handle this going wrong." He sighed, reaching out for me, pulling me into a tight hug. I held him tight. It was nice feeling him up against me again. I felt his breath on my neck as he sighed.
"If it helps, I've never felt this either." He said, now staring back at me. My cheeks burned.
"But I want to be with you, Kira. I want to be yours, and I want you to be mine." He said quietly.
"I want that too." I finally said. I saw his lips curve into a small smile.
"Sooooo.." He mumbled, now moving closer, pulling me closer to him.
"So now what?" I ask, staring up at him.
"I think now is when I ask.. Kira, would you be my girlfriend?" I couldn't help but smile, feeling my cheeks burn. I could see he was blushing now too. He was adorable. His hands moved to mine, our fingers intertwining. He leaned in close, his lips inches from mine, waiting. This is what I wanted right? Of course it's what I wanted. Right now. But what about what I said before I got here? I said I wouldn't be this girl on tour. I didn't want anyone thinking I didn't earn anything myself. But, I did want him.
"Yes." I said. "Under one condition."

He smiled, pulling me into a kiss.
"And what's that?" He asked.
"No one can know."