Status: Active <3
Devil, yet an Angel
The Broken Shell
I came back home a few hours later, feeling happy and calm. I was still a little mad at Alex about whad had happened, but the fresh air helped me relax and forget about it. While I was walking down the streets, I got a text from Rian, a friend I made at the party the other night. We met up at Starbucks and talked for a while. He is a really nice guy who is also studying music. He plays the drums and we share most of our classes. Rian said he will introduce me to his group of friends since I'm new here and that he has an idea in mind. He wouldn't tell me more. I'm looking forward to it. When I left rian, I went grocery shopping and bought a big quantity of food and different stuff. It cost me much, but I guess it is always more expensive the first time.
When I entered the appartment, it was complete silence meaning Alex wasn't back yet. Since I had the appartment all to myself, I unpacked my purchases and turned on my stereo and singed along to my favorite Blink-182 album. I was so into it that I didn't even notice Alex coming in the appartment. I was sitting in the kitchen, labelling my food just like Alex did for his. Two can play that game.
''Fuck Jack, turn the volume down!'' Alex yelled. I didn't listen to him. Instead, I turned it up.
''Are you kidding me?'' Alex screamed. He walked past me and turned the stereo off. Jerk.
''Hey, who gave you right to do that?'' I asked.
''I did. I live here too and I don't want to hear that loud music even though it is one my favorite bands.'' Alex replied.
''You love Blink?'' I asked.
''Who doesn't?'' He replied harshly. Okay, I had enough.
''Okay, listen to me Alex. I'm sick of your attitude.'' I said. ''What are you being such a jerk towards me? I didn't do anything to piss you off. Why are you trying to make me all upset? Is that a little game of yours? I'm tired of those sick little games of yours. So if you have something against me, just tell me already because there is no way I want to be roommate with a jerk who will my life miserable. I moved here to be happy and free, but you just won't let me be. I can't wait for classes to start Monday so I won't have to see your face as often. Or, why don't you just move back to where you come from with the boyfriend of yours and leave me alone. That would be a good idea.''
''I can't do that...'' Alex replied. Why isn't he yelling at me? He never misses an opportunity to make me feel bad about myself.
''Sure you can. All you have to do is pack your belongings and go home. See. It's simple.'' I said harshly, still pissed off.
''I can't because Zack broke up with me.'' Alex mentionned softly. I could see tears in his eyes. Well would you look at that, karma did his job.
''That's a good thing. He must have realized what a jerk you are.'' I said. I couldn't stop the words coming out from my mouth.
''I guess he did.'' Alex replied sadly before leaving the kitchen and locking himself in his room.
Even though I hate him, I couldn't help but feel bad. I didn't have to say those words to him, I'm not that type of guy. Even though a part of me was happy that Alex was heartbroken, a bigger part of me felt sorry for him. I wanted to apologize to him. I walked to his door and went to knock but I stopped when I heard him crying. Who have thought Alex had a heart? He must be very affected by the breakup.
I did not want to disturb him so I went back to the kitchen and finished labelling my food. The guilt feeling wasn't leaving. Why did I have to be such a good and caring guy? When I was done, I couldn't hear Alex cry anymore. I went to his door and took a deep breath before knocking on it. No answer. I knocked again and still got no answer.
''Alex, please open up...'' I said softly.
''Go away Jack.'' Alex replied. You could feel the sadness in his voice.
''You don't have to open up the door... just hear me out.'' I said. ''I...I'm sorry about what I said earlier. It wasn't nice and I should not have said such things to you. I know how it feels to be heartbroken. o yeah, I'm sorry Alex...''
I was about to go in my room when Alex's door open. In front of me was standing a total different Alex. It wasn't the tough and agressive Alex anymore. It was a vulnerable and soft Alex. He let me in and we both sat on his bed. We were both silent for a little while until Alex spoke.
''You don't have to be sorry, Jack.'' Alex said. ''You said it yourself, I'm a jerk.''
''Just because you're a jerk towards me doesn't mean I can't be sorry...'' I said. And I meant it. Just because Alex is not my favorite human being doesn't mean I want him to suffer.
''He broke up with me because he said he didn't recognize me anymore. He said I was not the Alex he felt in love with anymore. He said I canged and that he didn't like the new me.'' Alex said sadly. ''Why does everything good in my life leave? Why can't I just be happy for once?'' I did not really know what to reply, because to be honnest... I felt the same way about my own life.
''It gets better Alex.'' I reply softly looking at him straight in the eyes. '' It will get better.''
''How do you know that?'' He wondered as tears fell down his eyes. ''I-I'm just a jerk who lo-loses everything.''
''Because every storm as an end Alex...your storm will end.'' I said. Alex was now crying loudly. I didn't now how to react. I just patted his back and played with his hair to give him a little comfort. When the tears stopped, he looked at me in an intense way.
''You really look like him.'' He whispered.
''Like who?'' I wondered.
'''Oh, eum, nothing, it's nothing.'' Alex replied. ''Can you go now Jack, I would like to be alone?''
I just nodded and stood up.
''Hey Jack?'' Alex said.
''Yeah?'' I replied.
''Thank you... And I'm sorry too...for everything.'' Alex said. I gave him a short smile and left the room, closing the door behind me.
I went in my own room and laid on my bed. I closed my eyes and thought about all the recent events. I was searching for answers. What does Alex mean when he says everything good in his life leaves? Who was he talking about when he said I looked just like ''him''? But the one thing I knew is that behind his now hard broken shell lays a sensitive and vulnerable young guy. I intend to find more about this newly discovered side of him
When I entered the appartment, it was complete silence meaning Alex wasn't back yet. Since I had the appartment all to myself, I unpacked my purchases and turned on my stereo and singed along to my favorite Blink-182 album. I was so into it that I didn't even notice Alex coming in the appartment. I was sitting in the kitchen, labelling my food just like Alex did for his. Two can play that game.
''Fuck Jack, turn the volume down!'' Alex yelled. I didn't listen to him. Instead, I turned it up.
''Are you kidding me?'' Alex screamed. He walked past me and turned the stereo off. Jerk.
''Hey, who gave you right to do that?'' I asked.
''I did. I live here too and I don't want to hear that loud music even though it is one my favorite bands.'' Alex replied.
''You love Blink?'' I asked.
''Who doesn't?'' He replied harshly. Okay, I had enough.
''Okay, listen to me Alex. I'm sick of your attitude.'' I said. ''What are you being such a jerk towards me? I didn't do anything to piss you off. Why are you trying to make me all upset? Is that a little game of yours? I'm tired of those sick little games of yours. So if you have something against me, just tell me already because there is no way I want to be roommate with a jerk who will my life miserable. I moved here to be happy and free, but you just won't let me be. I can't wait for classes to start Monday so I won't have to see your face as often. Or, why don't you just move back to where you come from with the boyfriend of yours and leave me alone. That would be a good idea.''
''I can't do that...'' Alex replied. Why isn't he yelling at me? He never misses an opportunity to make me feel bad about myself.
''Sure you can. All you have to do is pack your belongings and go home. See. It's simple.'' I said harshly, still pissed off.
''I can't because Zack broke up with me.'' Alex mentionned softly. I could see tears in his eyes. Well would you look at that, karma did his job.
''That's a good thing. He must have realized what a jerk you are.'' I said. I couldn't stop the words coming out from my mouth.
''I guess he did.'' Alex replied sadly before leaving the kitchen and locking himself in his room.
Even though I hate him, I couldn't help but feel bad. I didn't have to say those words to him, I'm not that type of guy. Even though a part of me was happy that Alex was heartbroken, a bigger part of me felt sorry for him. I wanted to apologize to him. I walked to his door and went to knock but I stopped when I heard him crying. Who have thought Alex had a heart? He must be very affected by the breakup.
I did not want to disturb him so I went back to the kitchen and finished labelling my food. The guilt feeling wasn't leaving. Why did I have to be such a good and caring guy? When I was done, I couldn't hear Alex cry anymore. I went to his door and took a deep breath before knocking on it. No answer. I knocked again and still got no answer.
''Alex, please open up...'' I said softly.
''Go away Jack.'' Alex replied. You could feel the sadness in his voice.
''You don't have to open up the door... just hear me out.'' I said. ''I...I'm sorry about what I said earlier. It wasn't nice and I should not have said such things to you. I know how it feels to be heartbroken. o yeah, I'm sorry Alex...''
I was about to go in my room when Alex's door open. In front of me was standing a total different Alex. It wasn't the tough and agressive Alex anymore. It was a vulnerable and soft Alex. He let me in and we both sat on his bed. We were both silent for a little while until Alex spoke.
''You don't have to be sorry, Jack.'' Alex said. ''You said it yourself, I'm a jerk.''
''Just because you're a jerk towards me doesn't mean I can't be sorry...'' I said. And I meant it. Just because Alex is not my favorite human being doesn't mean I want him to suffer.
''He broke up with me because he said he didn't recognize me anymore. He said I was not the Alex he felt in love with anymore. He said I canged and that he didn't like the new me.'' Alex said sadly. ''Why does everything good in my life leave? Why can't I just be happy for once?'' I did not really know what to reply, because to be honnest... I felt the same way about my own life.
''It gets better Alex.'' I reply softly looking at him straight in the eyes. '' It will get better.''
''How do you know that?'' He wondered as tears fell down his eyes. ''I-I'm just a jerk who lo-loses everything.''
''Because every storm as an end Alex...your storm will end.'' I said. Alex was now crying loudly. I didn't now how to react. I just patted his back and played with his hair to give him a little comfort. When the tears stopped, he looked at me in an intense way.
''You really look like him.'' He whispered.
''Like who?'' I wondered.
'''Oh, eum, nothing, it's nothing.'' Alex replied. ''Can you go now Jack, I would like to be alone?''
I just nodded and stood up.
''Hey Jack?'' Alex said.
''Yeah?'' I replied.
''Thank you... And I'm sorry too...for everything.'' Alex said. I gave him a short smile and left the room, closing the door behind me.
I went in my own room and laid on my bed. I closed my eyes and thought about all the recent events. I was searching for answers. What does Alex mean when he says everything good in his life leaves? Who was he talking about when he said I looked just like ''him''? But the one thing I knew is that behind his now hard broken shell lays a sensitive and vulnerable young guy. I intend to find more about this newly discovered side of him
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