Untangle Me

Back at Hogwarts the celebration of Halloween was a big one. From the decoration even down to the feast. I'd always enjoyed Halloween when I was growing up. Tonight however was different, there was something about tonight that made me uneasy and gave me knots in my stomach. I looked out of the window as the sun set watching young muggle children in costume run and play.

Sirius came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist as he rest his head on my shoulder. We stood like that watching the muggle children start trick or treating.

"Can you feel it?" Sirius whispered.
"Which?" I replied, "Your dick in my back or that uneasy suspense in the air tonight?"
"I did mean the feeling in the air but we can solve the first problem if you'd like?" he said kissing my neck causing me to melt into him a little.
"You have dung for brains Sirius Black." I laughed as I turned to face him.
"But you love me." he countered.
I nodded and kissed him slowly, "But I love you." I repeated.

Sirius and I stood holding each other for the longest time, foreheads pressed together just soaking in each other's presence. It was amazing how far we had come as a pair. From borderline hating each other to a weird limbo where I never knew where I stood. From heartbreak to having to live under the same roof.

If it wasn't for the death eaters attacking me, I'd have never come back to Sirius and instead just continued to ignore my feelings for him and move on with my life. I'd have married somebody else and never given myself a chance at happiness with someone who I was truly meant to be with. Sirius and I were destined to be together. He was my best friend, my husband and my soul mate. Every day with him and our daughter was more special than the last and it was those two that made all the fighting and late nights seem worth it.

Those long sleepless nights after my attack where Sirius would stay up with me, forcing himself to stay awake with endless coffees were what made me fall for him all over again. I spoke about James and how as a child I'd always felt overshadowed by him because he'd always been the more confident one. I talked of Lily and how much her friendship meant to me. I spoke of war and chaos, knowing that my attack was just the beginning. Sirius talked about his life back at home with his parents. It broke my heart to watch him break down in my arms, finally accepting that that was just who his parents were destined to be. Pure blood snobs with all the wrong ideas about muggle borns and the muggle world. He had tried with Regulus, his younger brother, but to no avail. His family's support of the dark arts and The Dark Lord had led to his baby brothers untimely death. He would never admit it to me but I knew he felt guilty for not trying harder to help Regulus.

The truth was that Sirius's past and family had affected him more than he would ever care to admit, which was why I always made sure to tell him I loved him. The life we had made together in these troubled times was what family was supposed to be like. Sirius, Ezra and I. We were what family should be like. All of us were. James, Lily, Harry, Remus, Peter. We were a family, albeit a somewhat dysfunctional one but we were family nonetheless.

The room glowed bright as a blinding silver light landed in the living room.

"Is that a patronus?" I wondered.

Dumbledore's calming voice filled the room.

"Lord Voldemort has fallen. Stay indoors and await my arrival."

I stared into the spot where the patronus had just vanished unable to make sense of my feelings. Surely it couldn't be? You-Know-Who had gone. We were safe. James, Lily and Harry were safe!

"Sirius! Can you believe?" I beamed. "This is the best news ever! We need to celebrate."
Sirius looked somber. "Something isn't right," he said quietly, "something isn't making sense.."

Sirius began pacing round, muttering to himself. Picking things up and then putting them down again. Looking for something but what I didn't know.

"Sirius, what's wrong?" I asked. "You're worrying me."
"I've got a bad feeling about this, Ophelia. I need to go see James." he rushed, his thoughts frantic.
"Dumbledore said to stay here." I countered, "Just wait for him to get here. He will let us know what to do next."
"Don't you see, Ophelia? There isn't any time! Something isn't right. You said it yourself earlier! I have to go."

I nodded silently with tears in my eyes. The war had just ended and here Sirius was having some sort of breakdown.

"Ask James and Lily if they'd like to come over. I want to see them too and if Dumbledore is here, he can tell us all more."I offered.

Sirius nodded and kissed me. Tears fell from my eyes and mixed in with our kisses making them salty. I wasn't sure why I was crying, I just had a feeling that everything was about to change and I wasn't sure if it would be for the best or not.

"Give Ezra a kiss from me and under no circumstances are you to leave this house, understood?" Sirius asked gripping me tightly.
"Yes." I managed to croak out.
"I love you Ophelia Black."
"I love you too, Sirius."

The front door slammed shut behind Sirius as he left and I heard the engine of the bloody flying motorbike I disapproved of, roaring to life. Instantaneously, my nerves kicked in. I couldn't wait for him to get back with James, Lily and baby Harry. I hadn't seen them since way before Harry had turned one and due to circumstance they too had missed Ezra's second birthday last month.

With You-Know-Who gone things could finally start to get back to normal. We would all be able to rebuild our lives, slowly but surely. Sirius and James could go on to become Aurors like they'd wanted to. Lily could become a healer. I on the other hand had never had a plan for leaving school, just figuring I'd wing it and hope for the best. Perhaps I'd get a job at the department of mysteries? I didn't know but the best part was that anything was possible. You-Know-Who was gone for good.

I checked in on Ezra to make sure she was still soundly asleep and found her holding herself up using the bars of her cot. Smiling at her happily, I picked her up and held her close to me breathing in her scent. She smelt like a mix of vanilla and candy floss. I took her to the kitchen to get her a bottle, it was late and she would be grumpy in the morning without enough sleep.

"Mummy loves you oh so much, Ezzy." I cooed. "Daddy loves you too and he told me to give you big kisses!" I said placing kisses all over Ezra's face causing her to erupt in giggles.

A gentle knock on the door caused me to jump spilling a little bit of milk onto the floor. I stepped over the small puddle to put Ezra in her high chair so I could get the door. With my wand out and ready I unlocked the door with my free hand and opened it a sliver so I could see who it was.

"Professor!" I breathed a sigh of relief. "So good to see you!" I said stepped aside to let him in.
"I'm afraid I have some bad news for yourself and Sirius. May I speak with him?" Dumbledore said gravely as he followed me into the living room.
"He's gone out, why? What's happened professor? Is everything alright?" I asked as I took Ezra from her high chair to feed her her bottle.

My mind had already started going into overdrive. What had happened so important that Dumbledore needed to speak with Sirius so urgently?

"There is never an easy way to say this, Miss Potter nothing can ever soften the news of death.." Dumbledore started but I interrupted.
"Who do you mean? What is going on?"
"Ophelia, I'm afraid that James and Lily were murdered by Lord Voldemort."

It couldn't be true. My twin brother who had always been bigger, braver, stronger and smarter than me couldn't possibly be dead. Lily my best friend who always tried to keep me out of trouble, served me with lectures every time I got a detention, my bridesmaid and god mother to my daughter couldn't possibly be dead.

"You must be mistaken," I said, "there no way they can be dead."
"I wish it were not truth myself, Ophelia which is why I must speak to Sirius before the ministry gets here." Dumbledore said gently. "Where is he?"
"He's gone to James and Lily's."
"I feared so." Dumbledore muttered. "Would you like a cup of tea, Ophelia?" he offered.
"I don't want your poxy tea, Dumbledore! I want you to tell me what in Merlins name is going on here!" I fumed.

Dumbledore pushed up his half moon spectacles and inspected me with a great sadness in his bright blue eyes.

"The Potters were betrayed, somebody told Lord Voldemort of their whereabouts." Dumbledore explained.
"But that's impossible, Sirius is their secret keeper." I said not seeing how this was making any sense.
"The ministry believe that Sirius is working for the other side," he said seriously, "he was their secret keeper therefore the only one able to pass that information onto Lord Voldemort."
"You can't believe that professor! He wouldn't do that, you know Sirius!" I sobbed, half mad, "He would never betray his friends like that! Not James, he could never. You know him professor!"
"I don't believe that he would, but unfortunately even I have been known to be wrong. I had hoped I'd arrive before he set off." Dumbledore said sadly. "The Ministry of Magic are looking for Sirius. More than likely he will be in their custody by the morning."

I sat crying, holding Ezra close to me. I felt as though she too was about to be taken from me. Everybody else I loved had been taken from me in one night. Well almost everybody..

"What about Harry? Is my nephew alive?" I asked panicked.
Dumbledore nodded, "The boy lives. The killing curse meant for Harry somehow rebounded off him and destroyed Voldemort. Hagrid should be arriving to collect him any moment now. He shall be going to stay in Little Whinging with his mothers sister and her family."
"You mean Petunia!?" I exclaimed, "No, you can't! He is my nephew, he would be better with Ezra and I. Safer with us!"
"He needs anonymity, Ophelia. Growing up in the wizarding world will only damage him. Tomorrow wizards and witches everywhere will wake up, celebrating Harry as 'The Boy Who Lived'! There will not be a person in our world who doesn't know his name."

Dumbledore patted my back as I cried, conjuring up a handkerchief for me to wipe my tears on. The war had ended along with my happiness. Sirius was gone from me, my own husband had betrayed his best friends, betrayed his own daughter and betrayed me. The man I loved had sold his friends out to Voldemort. I felt sick. I didn't want to believe it but there was no other explanation. Sirius was their secret keeper, the only one capable of passing along that information.

"I want you to take Ezra and wait for me in my office. I've already made arrangements for you." Dumbledore said conjuring up a rusted fork which I assumed was a portkey. "Take what you need now and don't worry about your things, they shall all be waiting for you at a new location."

Silently I waved my wand as I walked through the house, causing things to pack away into my trunk. The last thing to fly into the trunk was a picture of the six of us. A reminder of all the things I had lost tonight.