Save Me From Myself

“Kellin, dinner’s ready!” My mom called from down the steps. I flinched and quickly put my razor down on the sink.
I was itching to hurt myself, the need tingling under my skin. “One second!” I shouted back and left my bathroom, quickly locking the door behind myself. My parents were basically loaded, so we lived a pretty posh life.
I ran down the steps from my room, nearly slamming into Kailey. “Jesus Kell,” she muttered and shook her head.
I followed her to the dining room and sat down in my seat. “How was school?” mom asked as she set a platter down in the middle of the table. “Fine,” I muttered.
“What about you Kailey?” mom asked. “Well, I got invited to the winter formal,” I sighed softly and speared a piece of chicken for myself, setting it on my plate. “Oh you did ?! Kailey that’s great. Who asked you?” she asked enthusiastically.
“Matt,” I rolled my eyes and put a few potatoes on my plate. Of course Matt asked her; he was her boyfriend.
“That’s great baby, I’m so happy for you two,” Kailey grinned a little and nodded. “Thanks mom,” she said as I ate my dinner. “Where’s dad?” I asked. “Um, he had to work late,”
I sighed again and went back to eating my dinner. I drowned out their conversation as I ate, and then waited to be excused. “Kellin, is you’re finished you can go,” Mom said nonchalantly. I nodded and stood up, going to put my plate and silverware in the dishwasher.
I quickly ran up to my room, locking the door behind myself. I went back into my bathroom and got out the same little razor. I shimmied my jeans down and then sat on the edge of my tub. I gently slid the blade between two old cuts, watching as my skin separated.
It was thin and not deep at all, only drawing the tiniest bit of blood. I drew another one, deeper this time, and smiled darkly as little red beads oozed up behind the razor.
I repeated it, making sure that I didn’t cut too deep. The blade slid over my skin again and again until most of my thigh was speckled with little reds blots.
I picked up an old towel off the floor, making sure I didn’t move my leg.
I pressed it against my thigh, wincing in pain as the fabric soaked it up. I pulled it away then and looked down at my shredded leg in satisfaction. One was enough for now. ~

“Hey Kelly, how ya’ feelin’?” Jack asked and leant against my locker before I could open it.
“I’m fine,” I said mechanically and tried to nudge him off my locker. “Well good for me then,” he said and grinned. “What?” Jack just shook his head and walked off, grinning to himself. I rolled my eyes and finally popped my locker open.
I glanced down the hall, noticing Vic and his girlfriend. She had him pressed back against the lockers, her hand resting flat on the middle of his chest.
Vic snaked his arms around her waist and kissed her, making me cringe. I saw a little flick of his tongue into her mouth and hastily looked away.
I sighed quietly and put my books into my locker before heading off down the hall.
I must not have been paying enough attention, because I tripped over something. My hands caught myself before I hit the ground, although my knees slammed into the tile.
I heard everyone laugh, and then someone was kneeling down in front of me. “Told you,” Jack said and laughed too.
He picked me up roughly, slamming me back against the wall. “What’s the matter Kellin?” he teased and dug his fists into my chest.
I looked behind him at Vic, to find him looking at me too. His chocolate eyes met mine, a sympathetic look in them.

He wasn’t laughing like the others, although he didn’t do anything to stop it.
“I’m talking to you,” Jack said, smacking my head back against the concrete.
“Alright, alright, break it up,” someone called. “Bostwick, Fowler, to my office,” Jack dropped me and turned around to look at Dr. Adams.
“We were just messing around Dr. Adams,” Jack lied. “I don’t care. Now everyone get to class,”
All of the students started rushing around to try and get to class before the bell rang, leaving the three of us standing there.
Dr. Adams motioned for us to follow him to his office. He led Jack and I through the main office and then pointed Jack inside. “You wait here,” he said, leaving me there.
I sighed and fell into a chair outside of his door.

I sat there for about a half hour before he called me in, detention slip ready for me. “I didn’t do anything,” I said. “You were fighting, and that is grounds for suspension. However, you didn’t hit him back, so you’ll only receive a detention,” I sighed and nodded, giving up, and taking the little pink slip. “Don’t let me see you here again Mr. Bostwick,” he said as I left the room.
I saw Jack sitting in the same chair where I had been, only now his mother was standing there scolding him.
I fought the urge to laugh at him and walked out of the office and towards my first class.
“You’re very late,” Ms. Martinez said when I walked in the door. “I know. I was in the office,” I explained quietly. “Do you have a pass?” I shook my head.
“Um, they didn’t give me one,” She sighed and went over to her desk, picking up the phone. I went to my seat in the back, making sure my eyes didn’t meet Vic’s as I walked passed him. “Yes, this is Camille. Was Kellin Bostwick just there?”
I sighed and shrunk back in my seat. “He was? Alright, thank you,” She looked up at me after hanging up the phone. “You’re excused Kellin. The work is on the board,”
I nodded silently and took out a piece of paper to write down the questions because o wouldn’t have time do it in the next ten minutes.
I saw Vic glancing at me out of the corner of my eye, making me blush. Why would he be looking at me? ~