Lovely Sad

Poppy just couldn’t get enough of John.

Since their late Saturday afternoon hike up Camelback Mountain she had seen him every day, sneaking out of the office for coffee and lunch dates during the day whenever either of them had a moment of free time. Granted, it had only been 4 days since the hike, but when they weren’t together the pair were glued to their respective phones texting each other. John didn’t know what had come over him, having never been a fan of texting or technology in general, but he just couldn’t turn down any opportunity to talk to Poppy. Even his bandmates had noticed, making him the punchline of all their jokes as they teased the usually technologically challenged man for his newfound love of his iPhone.

It was one of these jokes his bandmates found to be so funny that was currently making him late to pick up Poppy for their lunch date.

She was technically her own boss, and could make her own lunch hours as she pleased, but he still found it inconvenient as he searched through the 8123 studio to find his phone that his band’s drummer, Pat, had hidden somewhere. Normally he would downplay how much these pranks annoyed him, but John made no effort to hide how frantic he was over locating the missing phone. Without it he had no way of contacting Poppy and letting her know how late he was running, and his mind immediately went to the conclusion that she was going to think she was being stood up.

Finding the phone taped to a wall behind one of the many Arizona state flags they had hung up to decorate their personal studio, John rolled his eyes as he tore it down. He typed out the quickest message to Poppy he could manage as he jogged out of the studio to his waiting truck, running nearly half an hour late to their lunch date.

‘Sorry for the delay, I’ll be there in 10!!'

Truthfully, Poppy had lost track of time and had failed to notice that John was late, but seeing his name light up on her phone brought a whole new round of excited nerves. With John’s band’s new album completed and awaiting release, he had a lot of free time during the day which he had decided Poppy helped occupy nicely. They had only known each other for a few weeks at this point, but neither could even remember what they had done with their spare time before they had met each other.

She had seen him every day so far that week, but she still got the sensation of butterflies in her stomach at the thought of him. She was like a schoolgirl with a crush, but he found himself to be just as head over heels.

Expecting John’s arrival fairly soon, Poppy closed her laptop and grabbed her purse off of her desk. She snatched up her sunglasses as well, letting them hang off the collar of her white tank top, knowing she’d need them once she left the office. Poppy had purposely cleared her schedule for most of the afternoon, so she could spend as much of it with John as possible. Her workaholic attitude had allowed her to get ahead of almost all the deadlines that had been set by Candice and Adrian, and at this point she felt she had earned the afternoon off.

There was a knock on her office before it opened slightly, Adrian’s head popping into her line of vision.

“Hey, Pops.” He smiled warmly at her, stepping further into her office. “You busy at the moment?”

She hesitated her answer, knowing John would be arriving at the office any minute now to come and get her. She was genuinely confused at the sight of Adrian suddenly at her office, unable to come up with any reasons he could have been there.

“We don’t have a meeting scheduled?” She answered, placing her purse back onto her desk and opening up the agenda planner on her desk to double check that she hadn’t booked one and overlooked it. Although she highly doubted she would forget booking a meeting with him. In fact, Poppy had been hyper aware of every meeting and encounter with Adrian, determined to never let the whole ‘secret ex-husband’ fact slip up.

“No, no meeting today.” Adrian was now fully in her office, closing the door gently behind himself before he took a seat in the chair across the table from Poppy.

She slowly closed her agenda and raised a questioning eyebrow at him. “Is everything okay?”

“Perfect.” He replied, leaning back in the chair. Poppy didn’t like the mischievous grin that was fixated on his face. She had seen that look many times before and she knew it was always bad news. “I just couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

Poppy remained silent, crossing her arms firm across her chest as she narrowed her eyes at Adrian. These were all the little lines Adrian had used to win over a naive and desperate 18 year old Poppy. But at 25, she fought the urge to roll her eyes as he spoke.

“I just had to see you.”

“No.” Poppy cut off abruptly as she shook her head. “No fucking way.”

Adrian raised his eyebrows at Poppy, unsure of where this new stern Poppy had come from. He had never known her to be one to object to anything he said, especially when he was just trying to be nice. “My actions are harmless.” He tried to reason, raising his hands in defence.

“You don’t get to just do that, Adrian.” She scolded, standing up from her seat. He had some kind of nerve to show up at her office like this. This wasn’t fair to her, and it definitely wasn’t professional. “I’m with someone else and so are you.”

“You’re seeing someone new, eh?” She could have sworn she saw his smile falter for a second as he spoke. “Don’t worry, I’m just looking, not touching.”

Poppy was ready to start yelling as Adrian winked at her, but the sound of her phone buzzing with a new message silenced her. Knowing it was John letting her know he was now here, she grabbed the phone and the rest of her things. She just shook her head, brushing past Adrian towards the door of her office.

“You are unbelievable.” She seethed, pulling the door open and pausing in the doorway to scowl back at Adrian. “Don’t ever show up here like this again.”

Slamming her office door for emphasis, Poppy quickly made her way down to the parking lot of the building where John was waiting in his white SUV. She was so furious that Adrian would have the nerve to show up at her office like that, she was fairly certain steam was probably coming out of her ears. She took a deep breath to calm herself down before opening the passenger side door.

He smiled warmly as she climbed inside, leaning over the centre console to meet him in a quick kiss. Maybe it was because she was wound up from Adrian’s unannounced visit, but she found herself reaching up to place her hand on the back of John’s neck to deepen the kiss. She felt him smirk as she playfully bit at his bottom lip.

“Hello to you too.” He mused as the pair finally broke apart. “What’s that all about?”

Poppy sank back into her seat as John put the car into drive, heading out of the parking lot. She shrugged in response, intertwining her left hand with his right over the centre console of the car. “I’m just happy to see you.”

Her eyes still fixated on John as he drove, she watched the smile form on his face as he took in her words.

She was clearly overcompensating, desperate to forget Adrian’s office visit. Honestly, at this point she was just pretty desperate to forget Adrian’s entire involvement in her life. Signing divorce papers at 23 was probably the most humiliating moment of Poppy’s life, and the fact that they had eloped meant Poppy didn’t even get the wedding she had dreamed about as a little girl. A marriage license signed at Phoenix City Hall while Poppy was wearing cut off jean shorts and one of Adrian’s old college sweaters was what she got instead. Try as she might to hide her past, it had happened and there was no way to erase it. But she was determined not to make the same mistakes twice, that much was for sure.

“I was halfway here when I realized I left my wallet back at 8123.” He told her, referring to the music management company he had started up with his friends and bandmates. They had turned the back rooms of the office into a recording studio, naming it all after the address of the parking garage they had all hung out at as teenagers. “Mind if we stop there quickly to get it?”

Poppy nodded in agreement, John taking his eyes off the road briefly as they waited at a red light to smile over at Poppy. “Am I finally going to get a tour of the studio?” She asked.

Despite music being such a huge part of John’s life, the band was in the awkward stage between finishing the new album and beginning to practice for the upcoming tour. There was very little happening for his band at the moment. As a result, Poppy hadn’t gotten a chance to experience John in the environment he considered the most natural for him and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to get a glimpse into John’s world. The album was finished and ready for release in about a month, but John had been avoiding showing it to Poppy. She made him too nervous, and he was worried she wouldn’t be impressed by it.

“Sure, if thats what you want. Anything for you, Pops.” He smiled, bringing their intertwined hands up so he could lightly kiss Poppy’s knuckles. It was a small gesture, but Poppy felt her hear swell at the thought of John letting her into his own private world of music, even if it was just a little bit at a time. She had been tempted to look up his band online, but decided against it. She was sure John had his reasoning behind why he had yet to introduce her to any of it, and she was going to be patient and respect his wishes.

Poppy couldn’t help the smile that formed on her face, completely mesmerized by John’s actions. Just the smallest gesture from him had her completely forgetting anything to do with Adrian.

This was all new for Poppy. She had come to terms with the thought that every other relationship she would have, if she ever had one, would live in constant comparison to her marriage with Adrian. But whenever John was around, she was able to let her guard down and completely forget her 20 year old mistake.

As John made a right hand turn onto the road that the studio was on, tucked away on a suburban Tempe street not too far from Poppy’s own office, she felt her joy slowly start to slip away.

John had been very open about how traditional he was on previous dates. Growing up with younger brothers, he had spoke of his dream of a big wedding with all of his family members there and settling down into a house with a large yard to raise some kids and get a couple dogs. Poppy had mirrored his thoughts, but speaking of a big wedding, Poppy began to worry if John would still be interested in Poppy if he knew she had done this all before. She was second hand and used up.

Putting the truck into park in front of the house turned studio, Poppy did her best to smile over at John. Her expression seemed to work as he seemed oblivious to her sudden mood swing. She had never been so insecure before, an aspect of her and John’s relationship she considered to be bittersweet.

He hopped out of the truck, running around to the passenger’s side to let Poppy out. He laced his fingers with her own, leading her up to the 8123 offices.

Why couldn’t she have met John drunk at a bar at 18 instead of Adrian? Everything probably would have been a lot easier.