Whirl Wind

I haven't talked to Sid on the phone for almost two weeks. Sidney has been so focused on the playoffs and I don't really blame him. The Penguins have not been playing well at all, I have been giving Sidney space but also I need space because exams are coming up. My hockey team had made it to the Frozen Four but were upset and lost 2-1 in overtime. I was devastated and I have not fully gotten over it, which I can do when school is over and I am with Sidney.

I am two exams away from being done my undergrad. I have one on Friday and one on Monday. I have decided I'm not going to law school, I will become a paralegal if I don't get a spot on a CWHL team. I know I won't be able to live with Sidney next year but we both want to go after our dreams.

I am studying for a english exam on the couch while watching Pittsburgh play the Ottawa Senators. If they win tonight, they clinch a playoff spot which is what we want. Sidney scored 10 seconds in and now in the third period Pittsburgh is only winning 3-2 and Ottawa is looking like they are going to tie it. It looks like the Pens have packed up think they can win it like that. It was frustrating seeing the team like this and I know Sidney took it really hard on himself to preform well as I do too. I decide to call Taylor and see what she is doing tonight.

"Hello?"

"Hey Tay, its Charlie."

"Hey Char, whats up?"

"Just watching the game you?"

"Me too. Its not looking too good." Tay says.

"Yeah, I hope they get something going."

"They have been playing like literal shit the past few games." Tay says seriously and I have to laugh a little.

"I know, I haven't said anything to Sid, we are barely talking."

"Why? Did he do something wrong?"

"Oh no, I just am letting him focus on making the playoffs and so I can study. We got knocked out of Frozen Four."

"I heard that, I'm sorry Char. Are you still upset about it?"

"Yeah I haven't gotten over it, I just need a night to go drink and let my hair down but I only have two exams so I guess it will have to happen after."

"Right after your last one you should come visit me."

"Aren't you coming to Pittsburgh after the season?"

"No, I'm thinking of staying in Rimouski and train here. But I will be there for the playoffs. I'm not sure yet."

"Have you asked Tyler his plans?"

"Well he didn't play last night but they are tied in their series. He's going back to Newfoundland this summer."

"You don't want to be closer to him this summer?"

"We broke up."

"What? Tay I'm sorry then fuck him." I say.

"Yeah." She chuckles a little.

"How long ago?"

"About a month? I guess."

"Wow you need to come to Pittsburgh with me Tay! We can go out and drink and dance. But then come live with Kath and I in Huntsville."

"Wait? You aren't staying with Sid all summer?" Tay asks.

"Nope we are going on a trip with our families but we agreed for August he will be in Cole Harbour where he can train and we will visit each other."

"Wow!"

"How come you sound so surprised?" I ask curious.

"I thought you guys would live together and maybe you move to Pittsburgh."

"Nope. I might live with Sid after the summer but right now I want to make the CWHL. So I want to focus on that."

"Did you apply for the draft?" Tay asks excited.

"Yeah why?"

"I did too!!"

I yell. "WHAT? SO DID KATH."

"ALL OF US!" Tay yells.

"The three amigos." I smile but son frown because the Sens have tied it up. "Fuck" I say under my breath.

"Those pesky sens." Tay jokes. "I thought you were a Habs fan why are you so into it."

"Oh I still am. I just want Sid to make the playoffs, I like him being happy."

"Ohh okay."

"What's Sid like after he loses in the playoffs?"

"Depressed for about a week. Then he leaves Pittsburgh goes on a trip, where I'm pretty sure he gets drunk like overnight. By the time he gets to Cole Harbour he is looking forward to next season."

"So I have to be careful?" I ask.

"Well he acts how we all act. Sad, mad, blames himself."

"So basically what I was like last week."

"Yeah you should call him after the game tonight or maybe tomorrow. Try to brighten his mood and maybe he will brighten yours too."

"Okay well Sens just scored for the winner so I will text him. I wish there was more I could do."

"Yeah well now you know how others feel around us when we lose."

"Love you Tay I will call you after my last exam. Maybe I will pick you up in Rimouski and we can fly to Pittsburgh together."

"That sounds good. Love you Char. Bye" I hang up and text Sidney. 'Head up babe. Tough loss but u worked hard. I love u and I miss u xx.' Sidney and I have only been dating for 3 months but it feels like its been almost a year with our schedules. I cannot wait for us to be together for June and July. My phone beeps.

'Times are tough. 5 days, miss and love u so much <3 Can i call?'

'When you get to the hotel okay? I will study english for 1hr. Call me when u get in.'

'Ok babe, I do love u xx'

'I know Sid, head up.'

Sidney seems to miserable and it feels like we had this conversation over text about a week ago when I got knocked out of Frozen Four. We lean on each other for support and know how to get through things because we have been there many times. Losing honestly sucks so much. I study for about an hour and a half before my phone goes off and a sad Sid appears on my screen.

"Hey." He says sadly.

"We haven't facetimed in a while. I missed your face." I say.

"I know I'm sorry what have you been up to?"

"Studying like a mad man."

"Hopefully you aren't a man." He smirks a little.

"You know damn well I am a girl."

"I don't think I do." He smirks more.

"Down boy. We are not."

"But babe I miss you."

"I miss you and I know you are sad but I am too and emotions make us do stupid stuff and that would be one of them."

Sid cracks a smile. "Babe stop being sad about Frozen Four, be excited for the next step. The CWHL and if not that finding a job in Pittsburgh with me. You are going to bigger and better things."

I smile. "I guess so. How are you feeling?"

"Well we had dinner and I had some drinks and I'm talking to my girl so I am feeling better, but almost not feeling anything."

"Siddd."

"I know Char, I'm being careful. I just want to win so bad and we were winning 3-0. Then we stopped, we let um and they caught us on it."

"Just let it out babe."

"People are saying this is the worst Penguins collapse they have ever seen and this is under my captaincy. I hear the media, we need to be in the playoffs. We need to play better. I need to."

"Sid you are playing great, you can't expect yourself to carry the team. Thats the thing you are a team and I know you represent it but its impossible for you to carry the team on your back. You guys just have to work together and battle hard. It comes down to who wants it more. And I know you guys want it the most."

"Charlie that was great." I hear in the background of Sidney and some clapping.

"Who is that?"

"Pauly just came in."

"Hey Martin."

"Hey, hows Minny?"

"Boring I cannot wait to leave."

"Why would you ever want to leave? Its great there."

"Well my family and boyfriend aren't here."

"You guys make me puke." Pauly laughs and leaves.

"Look Sid I love you and I miss talking but I need to go to bed."

"Okay Char, study hard babe. I'm so proud of you."

"I will babe I love you."

"I love you too baby. Call me soon and I will text you tomorrow. Only 5 more days until we are together."

"I'm so excited, I miss you."

"Miss you babe. I should go, Bye!"

"Bye!" I hang up and study for about an hour more before going to bed. Tomorrow and Sunday are going to be filled with studying straight all day long.