Screaming Gestures

~106 ~ 3131

Driving myself to school was definitely no longer an option. Today, though, it wasn’t my fault as Mom hadn’t even given me the chance to try a second time. The first thing she did when she woke me up was ask for my car keys. The second thing she did was force me into a dress she had picked out for me the day before while she was shopping.

Standing behind me as she studied me in my full length mirror, Mom did her best to hide her smug smile. Only her best wasn’t good enough.

I saw how happy she was being able to control what I wore to school and how I got there. Although, after the stunt I pulled last night by making her and Dad fight, I thought it best to go along with what she wanted with little argument.

Mom pulled my dark hair out of it’s French braid and combed her fingers through it. The hairs unfolded into long, large waves and my mother smiled brighter. “You look great.” She signed, through the mirror.

“I feel weird.” I told her, pulling at the hem of the dress in an attempt to make it longer. “Do I really have to wear this? I looked ridiculous.”

“You look fine.”

“I can’t wear my hair like this.” I insisted, seeing how frizzy it looked. “It’s sticking up too much. I look like the bride of Frankenstein.”

Mom scoffed. “Your hair’s not dark enough and you don’t have the white streak. I will fight to the death before you ever did that.” She went to my bathroom, probably rummaging through my cabinets in search of any makeup product that I owned, if I owned any.

I narrowed my eyes and pursed my lips in her direction, knowing her sarcastic quips were just another way to show how upset she was with me. I looked at myself in the mirror again, shaking my head. The dress was a dark green skater dress with three-quarter sleeves. I didn’t understand why she’d forced me into a dress anyway. It was high school, not a beauty pageant.

Mom came out of my bathroom, holding an eyeliner pencil in her hand. “Stay still.” She signed, taking my face in her hands.

“Really?”

Mom nodded, and I sighed, closing my eyes, going along with it. When she finished, she gave me a tap on the shoulder and faced me once again to the mirror.

I sighed, examining myself. I looked enough stranger than I had with just the dress. However, knowing my mother, it wasn’t worth the fight.

“Now,” Mom started, looking at me directly in my eye, “Go downstairs and eat some breakfast. We’re leaving in twenty minutes.”

I nodded at her and left my room, being sure to grab my backpack. When I arrived in the kitchen, my father was sitting at the small table, reading a small file folder. I waved at him, going for my cereal, not wanting to talk about what he’d seen last night or the overly emotional moment that the two of us shared. I sat with my breakfast, ate it quietly, and waited for Mom to come downstairs and tell me we were leaving.

Unfortunately, because my mom had to drop me off at school and get to work on time, I ended up at school early. The school was practically empty aside from a couple handfuls of cars. Probably an early morning sports practice or something.

Sitting outside the classroom on the floor in my dress proved itself to be a problem. However, I managed it and pulled out my copy of Heart of Darkness to start reading. I quickly lost myself in the book, though that wasn’t hard. The only distraction I had as I sat there in the early morning was my English teacher, who looked rather panicked as she took hurried steps towards the classroom.

Ms. Blake hadn’t paid me any mind as she entered her classroom and closed the door behind her.

I stared up at the door, briefly wondering what her problem was, and then returned to my book. About ten minutes later, out of the corner of my eye, I saw the door open again. I looked up and my smile grew, seeing Derek come out of the classroom. Quickly, I got up from my spot on the floor and stepped towards him.

Derek saw me, and he seemed to change in the way he stood. His shoulders lightened and his own smile grew. Derek slowly approached me and waved.

I had to admit that I had missed Derek’s smile. I hadn’t seen it since he was a kid, before the fire. “So, tell me, is it normal for people of Beacon Hills to hang around high school six years after they’ve graduated?” I signed.

“Very funny.” Derek signed, looking me over. He raised a brow. “What’s with the dress?”

I shrunk into myself, and opened my mouth to respond, but a sigh came out. I looked down at the dress. “This is my mom’s way of trying to make me better, I guess.” I looked to him. “Or she’s just trying to control me, I haven’t figured it out fully yet.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, I know right.” I scoffed a laugh. “I look pretty stupid.”

Derek shrugged. “I think you look beautiful.” He signed.

I felt my face blush as the heat rose to my cheeks. “Thanks.” I said to him. “You look better. I take it things went well with...whatever you had to do the other day.”

“Uh, yeah.” Derek nodded. “Things are okay. My friends are okay.” He said, wavering slightly.

I furrowed my brow at him, noticing his lie. “No, they’re not.” I took a step closer to him. “What happened?”

Derek shook his head with a small smile on his face. “Can’t lie to you, can I?”

“When the only thing someone can rely on to tell how a person feels is their body language, they learn to read it well.” I explained. “I can’t hear a person’s distress, but I can see it. And you, there’s something bugging you.”

“Everything’s fine, CJ. I promise.”

I didn’t believe him, of course, so I rolled my eyes and shook my head. “Okay.”

Derek grabbed my hand, holding it carefully.

I caught his gaze, watching his lips.

“I just don’t want to talk about it.”

I looked up at him. In looking about him closer, this time, I saw that he didn’t just look different anymore, he was different. I don’t think it was seeing me again that did that for him either. In the last year since I’ve seen him, he’s changed. “What’s happened to you? Over the past year?”

“A lot. Of nothing.” Derek laughed.

I nodded, but still wasn’t buying it. “Alright.” I smiled.

Derek let out a breath. “How about I take you up on your offer and come over tonight?” He asked, probably trying to get my focus off of him. “That sound good?”

“Yeah. It does.” I agreed flatly, going along with his evasive plans. “It’ll be nice to get the attention off of me for one night.”

Derek smiled and opened his arms for a hug.

I took the final step forward and wrapped my arms around his torso when his tightened around my shoulders. I felt his heartbeat in his chest. When I pulled away, he held me at an arm’s length.

“I’ll text you tonight and you can pass me the address.”

“Are you sure?” I asked, suddenly nervous about the whole thing. “My parents are really intrusive recently and after not hearing from you for a year, they will be all over your case.” I shook my head. “And I don’t know what else is going on with you, if you’ve got something else planned.”

“If I had something else planned, I wouldn’t have offered.” Derek insisted. “I’ll be there, CJ.”

“Promise?” I questioned, thinking of Carter and how he’d said he’d stop by and didn’t.

The corner of Derek’s mouth, twisted up and he nodded. He leaned forward, kissing my hairline. “Promise.”

I grinned at him, grateful that he was paying attention to my signing and starting to pick it back up. Behind Derek, the door to the classroom opened, and I glanced around him to see Ms. Blake watching us. I furrowed my brow at her and she quickly turned away, going to her desk. I looked up, seeing Derek looking at her with a curious eye. I tapped his arm. “How do you know my teacher?”

Derek looked at me like he got caught doing something he shouldn’t have been. “I don’t. Not really.”

I narrowed my eyes at him, but nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you later, right?”

“Yeah.” Derek nodded. “I’ll see you later.” He put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it before walking away.

I took a deep breath, realizing that the school was about to be filled with students and entered the classroom. On my way to my seat, Ms. Blake got my attention and waved me towards her desk. I approached and looked at her questioningly. “Do you have another assignment for me?” I asked her, wondering why she wanted to talk. “You already gave me all the work for this week.”

Ms. Blake shook her head and stopped, realizing I wouldn’t be able to read her lips. “No, I actually had a quick question. A completely, and totally, unprofessional question.”

“Uh, okay?” I said, confused.

“You know Derek?” She asked me.

I nodded. “He’s a friend of the family.” I told her. “I’ve known him since I was little.”

“Great. So you know?”

I was confused by her question, but I nodded slowly anyway. “Yeah, I know him.”

Ms. Blake let out a sigh of relief. “Okay.” She said, I guessed to herself. “Do you know if he’s seeing anyone?”

I was a little shocked by the question. I opened my mouth to say something, but then I remembered I didn’t actually know if he was or not. Suddenly, I thought to everyone he had a relationship and how badly they all ended. Paige, being found dead in the woods, and Kate disappearing after the fire. Derek never seemed to want to talk about either of them, especially Kate.

“I’m sorry.” Ms. Blake said quickly, not waiting for the answer to her question. “I really should not be asking you that question. It’s really inappropriate.” She looked down at the papers on her desk and started to sift through them. Ms. Blake pulled out a stack of papers, stapled together with my name on the top, and held them out to me. “These are next week’s lesson plans. She reached behind her to the stack of books on the floor, against the wall. “You’ll need this.” Ms. Blake handed me the book.

I looked at the cover of The Crucible and then looked back at her.

Ms. Blake showed me a small, innocent smile, but I couldn’t help but think she wasn’t all that innocent.

I nodded at the teacher though, and took my seat in the front row. Not long after I sat down, Allison and Lydia entered the room. I was sure that Lydia was embarrassed about last night. I felt bad for her, something I thought I would never do. It wasn’t her fault that her mom managed to stick her nose too far into somewhere it didn’t belong. I could relate, because my mom did that all the time. Hence, my wardrobe for the day.

Behind me, Lydia tapped on my shoulder.

I hadn’t really wanted to, but I turned around to face her.

She picked up her hands and started to sign to me. “I’m sorry about…” Lydia trailed off, trying to recall the sign.

“Last night?” I asked, showing her the signs.

“Was that the sign for ‘last night’?”

“It’s not technically one sign, but yes.”

Lydia sighed. “My mom is - ”

I cut her off, shaking my head. “I know. She thinks what my mom does: that I’m broken and need to be fixed.” I pursed my lips. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I realized the first bell was ringing.

“Yeah.” Lydia said, wishing she could say something else.

I took in a deep breath, recalling my conversation with my dad last night. I opened my mouth, hesitated, but said it anyway before more people could enter the classroom. “I’m not broken.” I told her, strongly. “I’m bruised and sad, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.” From the corner of my eye, I saw Allison turn her head towards me. I shrugged, looking from Lydia to Allison and back. “One day, it won’t hurt so much.”

Lydia showed me a small smile, “I’m still sorry.” She said.

“I forgive you.” I responded, hoping that she would understand the forgiveness was not extended to her mom. My phone vibrated again and I knew class should be starting soon. I smiled at her and turned back towards the front of the class. I watched as Stiles and Scott trailed in just as the bell was sounding. I shook my head.

Scott met my gaze and quickly looked away.

That was definitely a weird situation and I wanted to ask what his problem really was last night, but I didn’t think I’d ever get the chance. I spent the class period, finishing Heart of Darkness and then working on the final assignment for it. I groaned when my phone signalled the class was over. My class with Mr. Harris was next and it was the only class I had to focus on the teacher in. I couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t just give me the notes for the class. I’d even accept an extra handful of work if he offered it.

Science was hard to follow if you didn’t have all the information. The worst part was, Harris never wrote down everything he said, and he faced the chalkboard most of the period. I got to the lab and sat in my seat. I didn’t have a partner at my table, mostly because I was hard to work with. I got that. I wasn’t offended, but no one really had the balls to try. Except today, seemed to be different.

As I unpacked my books from my bag, a tall, blond boy came in and had plopped himself in the chair next to me without a word. The guy seemed angry and, seeing the look on his face, I didn’t even want to ask why.

Class went by slowly. The fact that I was checking the time every two minutes wasn’t helping. The chalkboard was full of charts and graphs that I couldn’t make sense of. I looked beside me at my partner’s notebook, but his notes were no help.

He’d been staring angrily towards the front of the classroom and hadn’t written a single thing on his paper.

I sighed, and flipped viciously through my textbook. It was time to teach myself this mess. What shocked me was that after twenty minutes of staying statuesque, the boy next to me moved. I turned my head to look at him as he asked to use the restroom. So, no notes and now he was going to skip out on class altogether? Boy, was I lucky to get such a studious partner. I meant to turn back to my book and read passages on momentum, but I saw Scott stand from his post at the table behind me.

Scott seemed panicked as he asked Harris if he could use the bathroom, too.

I furrowed my brow, putting some small pieces together. Maybe that was why Scott wasn’t dating Allison anymore. Maybe he had a thing for my new lab partner. Although, I wasn’t sure that I got that vibe from either of them, who was I to judge. I turned away from Scott, not really bothering with what else he had to say. Seeing him last night replayed in my head again.

A couple more moment of Harris talking about stuff that I didn’t understand passed and he suddenly stopped. He looked towards the classroom door and walked to it, pushing the door open.

When the rest of the class followed him, I got up, slowly, wondering if I had missed the announcement about the mini-field trip we were taking. However, when the class stopped right outside the door, I pushed through a few people to see what was going on.

Danny was on the floor, comforting one of the twins Lydia was drooling over the other day, and my lab partner was standing over him. The twin’s face was bloodied and looked beaten to a pulp.

I seethed, once again proud of my new lab partner’s choices, but then I looked closer at my partner. He was confused, but not angry. He looked like he didn’t know what had just happened.

Danny helped the twin up and walked him down the hallway, probably towards the nurse.

Harris turned around to the class and spoke to us. “Everybody back inside while I get Isaac a detention slip.” The teacher led the class inside, but I stayed.

I noticed Scott eyed me, but I didn’t bother saying anything to him. I approached the boy, who I assumed was name Isaac. “Everything okay?” I asked, quietly.

Isaac looked to me, even more confused. “Why are you asking me that?”

“Because you didn’t actually just beat the crap out of that kid.” I told him, shrugging. I sensed that he was still lost. “Your hands.” I pointed, looking down at them. “They aren’t as bloody as his face. So either you got really creative when you were bashing his face in, or you didn’t do it.”

Isaac’s stare was blank as he took in what I said. Then his eyes moved over my head for a moment and he looked back to me. “We have to go inside.” Isaac said, pointing behind me.

I turned to see Harris standing at the door, with a small scowl on his face. “Sorry, sir.”

“I didn’t realize you knew Isaac, CJ.” Harris said to me before I could enter his classroom.

“I don’t.” I shrugged. “He’s just my lab partner.”

Harris nodded, holding out a slip of paper to Isaac, who was waiting behind me to enter the classroom. “Inside before you both have detention.”

I nodded, and the two of us moved back to our seats.

Isaac sat and tapped my arm. “You notice things.”

“I do.” I said, wondering why he was telling me something I knew.

“Thank you.” He said, with a smirk. “For realizing I didn’t do it.”

I nodded. “You’re welcome.”