Stay by My Side

When someone throws some statistic involving a large number, you tend to not think about it too hard. Numbers and odds are something you don’t think about unless it has to do with you directly. Dan wasn’t the exception to that. He’s never given a second thought to numbers, odds and statistics, because frankly he just didn’t care. Until it happened to him. Out of the seven billion people in the world, he never expected to run into his other half – yet here he was, risking his life every day just to see him. Even after meeting Phil, Dan never deeply considered what exactly the odds were of that happening, or just how unlikely that was. But now, the only thing on his mind is the odds of that happening. Why? Because he’s the one facing these odds.

At this exact second there is seven billion, two hundred seventy seven million, six hundred eighty one thousand, six hundred and four people in the world. And Dan is searching for one in particular: Ian’s other half. He wasn’t sure why he thought this would be so easy, to find one person out of billions just like that. But it definitely wasn’t. He’s tried searching all across the globe, but when you have the whole world in your hands where do you begin? If it was Ian searching, that would be different for they are naturally drawn together. However, Ian was not about to go out searching for a girl, unless it was for a one-night stand – granted that is how Dan and Phil met.

“What’s wrong?”

“What?” Dan asked, startled. He hadn’t realized he was so lost in his thoughts. Phil smiled, scooting closer to him and kissed Dan lightly on the lips.

“You were thinking hard about something.. you had a slight frown on your face.”

“Oh, just thinking about my brother. I’m worried about him, is all.”

“You have a brother?” Phil asked in surprise. You’d think Dan would have mentioned this by now; after all, they’ve known each other for nearly two months already. He wasn’t the only one surprised: Dan had not planned on talking about his family at all. But a little bit of information couldn’t hurt right?

“Uh, yeah. He’s a few years older than me. He’s just seemed so…miserable lately. I think what he needs is to find his other half. But he claims he doesn’t want to, so I’ve been trying to find her for him, but it’s such an impossible task.”

Phil couldn’t help but laugh and shake his head at that. "Dan, there’s over seven billion people in the world right? You can’t expect to just come across her like it’s nothing. You’re absolutely right, it is impossible. You have to let him find her on his own, even if it’s by accident. Because when the time is right, their paths will cross.”

“Spoken like a true romantic,” Dan teased, smirking at Phil’s faux hurt expression, and the blush that managed to creep its way across his face.

“Oh shut up. I’m just trying to help, asshole.”

“My God, you’re adorable when you get feisty.”

“We’ve been over this – I’m not adorable because I’m a grown man. I think the word you’re looking for is sexy.”

“I think sexy is a bit of stretch for you, Phil.” At that, Phil’s mouth opened in indignation, but before he could make a retort, Dan was attacking him with kisses, knocking Phil to his back on the couch. Dan could feel Phil’s smile against him in between kisses, which made him smile right back. While what Phil said was very true, he wasn’t going to give up on finding Ian’s soulmate. It’s ironic how two months ago Dan was a relentless mass murderer who was revolted by humans, yet here he was now making out with one he was meant to be with.

Dan’s train of thought quickly ended there, for Phil’s tongue made its way into his mouth while he pulled him closer to him. He knew exactly where this was going, and he loved it.

Over the next month, things went about normally – well as normally as it can when you’re living a double life. Dan was Phil’s loving and sweet boyfriend by day, and mass murderer by night. If his life was a movie, he’d be winning an Oscar for his acting. This doesn’t mean it hasn’t been taking his toll on him, however. He’s been losing weight – and fast. His ribs began to slightly show, as he could never keep his food down for more than twenty-four hours. None of his pants fit him anymore, and he had to begin making his own holes on his belt. To make matters worse, both Phil and Ian noticed this. The dark circles were back under his eyes, as he could rarely sleep, with the exception of when he was with Phil.

Dan began searching even more fervently for Ian’s other half, for he knew that he was running out of time, and could not keep this facade up for much longer. He knew Ian had a thing for brunettes, and that was it. It didn’t narrow down the search very much. This added on stress didn’t help either and soon his collar bones became extremely prominent. It was getting harder and harder to come up with lies to explain what was going on with him, especially to Phil. He could tell his other half didn’t believe anything he said, but he didn’t question him further, either. Dan was extremely grateful for this.

So to make things up to Phil, he planned a date night for them.

“You should go on a vacation,” Dan suggested to Ian suddenly.

“What?”

“Go on vacation, take a few days off, meet a girl, have some fun. You’ve been worrying about me for nearly a month now, you need to relax.”

“I don’t know…” He hesitated, gazing at Dan, as if he was trying to figure out whether there was an ulterior motive.

“Go somewhere warm, bask in the sun, get away from this freezing ass weather. I’m offering it so I mean it. Turn off your pager, and have a stress free time. Think of it as an early birthday present from me.”

Ian pursed his lips, thinking it over, before a smile took place of it. “Okay, yeah that sounds nice. Are you sure?”

Dan returned his smile and grabbed his pager, flicking it on silent before handing it back to him. “For the love of Dad, yes I am sure. Now go, before I change my mind,” He teased. Ian smirked and was gone in a second, surely to go pack. Dan breathed a sigh of relief, and also flicked his pager on silent, not worrying about the consequences for now. He was going on a vacation of his own as well.

“How’d you manage to get two whole days off?” Phil asked, a grin on his face.

“I have some vacation days lined up and I decided to use a few right now. I know we haven’t actually had a lot of time together lately, and I’ve missed you a lot. So I figured now was as good a time as any.”

“It’s like Christmas all over again,” Phil replied, wrapping his arms around Dan’s neck. Dan smiled, placing his hands on his hips. Phil’s blue eyes were shining with happiness and Dan placed what he meant to be a quick kiss on his soft lips, but Phil had other plans. He pulled Dan’s face back to his own and deepened the kiss, tangling his hands in the younger’s brown hair.

“You should go get your coat,” Dan whispered into his ear, managing to pull away. “We have dinner reservations in less than an hour.”

“You’re always full of surprises,” He mumbled as he untangled himself from Dan. He couldn’t help but grimace at that – if only he knew.

“Jesus, Dan how expensive is this place?” One look at the menu and Phil could already tell this is a kind of place he typically didn’t belong in.

“Don’t worry about it, I got it.” He assured and proceeded to order one of the most expensive wines on the menu. Hopefully he’d be able to keep this down during the next few days. As delicious as it was, he didn’t want to be tasting it again on the way back up.

“You seem a lot happier compared to the last time I saw you,” Phil observed, looking over the menu at Dan.

“That’s because I’m with you,” Dan teased, trying to make light of the situation.

“You know that isn’t what I mean,” Phil sighed. He was going to leave it at that, but changed his mind. It worried him seeing Dan looking so frail and he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. “Your eyes have more life to them, too. And you seem more like yourself.”

Dan looked up from his menu, noting his worried expression and set his menu down. “I know, I’m sorry Phil. Work has been stressing me out, but I think what I need is just this vacation and some quality time with you. I promise these next two days I’ll make it up to you, alright?” Phil nodded, happiness replacing the worry.

“It’s alright, I get it. Now tell me, what the hell are half these things on the menu?”

By the end of the night, Dan was beginning to feel much more like himself. After eating their ridiculous small portioned, expensive meal that left them hungry, they ended up ordering a pizza and watching movies on Phil’s couch. It was the perfect end to a perfect day. Dan was lying on his back, with Phil resting against him, his head lying on his chest. He could smell his cinnamon scented shampoo which was intoxicating. Dan softly traced Phil’s spine, focusing on his steady breathing. He’d fallen asleep, his long dark eyelashes casting shadows on his cheekbones. Soon Dan felt his eyes grow heavy as well until he could no longer keep them open.

For the first in over a month, Dan slept through the entire night. He woke up a little after eight and checked his pager, revealing seven missed pages. Seven wasn’t too bad. He looked over at Phil, who was quietly snoring, with his mouth slightly open. It was rather endearing, really. He gave him a light kiss on the cheek before teleporting back to the U.S to make up for the work he missed last night. He couldn’t have Ian come back from his vacation to see that Dan had done absolutely nothing. Dan sighed, and tried to get it done as quick as possible. The sooner he can get back to Phil the better.
It was a little after nine when he finished, and surprisingly he only got sick once. It could’ve been worse. As Dan was dumping the last body, his phone went off. It was a text from Phil, asking where he was. Oh good, another lie he needs to drown himself in.

“Dan?” Phil called out from somewhere in the loft, upon hearing the front door open. “Where’d you go?”

He followed his voice to the kitchen, where Phil was making pancakes. “I went to go pick us up breakfast and coffee, but I see that was useless.” Phil turned around and noted the food and drinks in his hand and smiled his crooked smile.

“I guess we’re having a big breakfast!” He exclaimed flipping a pancake. Dan smiled relieved and came up behind Phil, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his head on his shoulder.
“Really, Phil, chocolate chips? What are you, ten?”

Phil chuckled and spun around so he was facing the taller man. “No matter how old someone is, they always enjoy chocolate chips in their pancakes, it’s a known fact,” He attempted to say with a stern face, but they both just ended up laughing. “But seriously though, Dan, as sexy as I find you and your body, you could stand to gain a few pounds.”

Dan playfully rolled his eyes, ready to respond with a sarcastic remark when the smell of smoke met his nose. “Good luck fattening me up if you burn all your pancakes.”

Phil’s eyes widened before he spun around, attempting to save the charcoaled pancake, but it was too late. “Well..it’s a good thing you bought breakfast.” Dan couldn’t help but laugh.

“I recalled you bragging to me weeks ago about what a great cook you are. That’s ironic, huh?”

“Oh that’s how–” Phil paused, frowning while gazing at Dan. “Is that blood on your shirt?” He looked down, and sure enough there was blood spatter on the collar of his shirt. He felt the color drain from his face. He looked up at Phil, frantically searching for an explanation.

“Um..yeah, it might be. This is an old shirt, so I’m not sure,” He stammered. Phil frowned for a second before shrugging and turning back to continue cleaning up his attempt at making pancakes. Dan exhaled and shakily sat down at the kitchen table. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep this up – there’s no way he could continue doing this, keeping his two lives separate without their paths ever crossing.

He sighed, taking a drink of his coffee. He looked over at Phil who was washing dishes while humming his own tune and he couldn’t help but smile. There’s no way he could give up his life with Phil. Now that he’s met him, there’s no moving on past him; once meeting your other half, it becomes nearly impossible to live without them, as you’re naturally drawn to them.

However on the other hand, he couldn’t keep risking Phil’s life every time he selfishly indulged in his presence. He would never be able to be with Phil peacefully with Ian and his father breathing down his neck. Dan rested his head in his hands, he knew he would have to make a decision between the two – before it is too late and the decision is made for him.