I'm a User... You're My Drug

+6 Months Later...+

There I was again, sitting out on the balcony of my bedroom at Killian's mansion in Van Nuys, California. I had been living with him for six months now. He has been helping me work on my music, getting my sound out there. Phoenix was even going to a private school now. We were living the good life. Gertrude and Bruce came out to see us last month. Gertrude stayed for a week with us.

"Ouch, calm down in there, would ya?" I said looking down at my very pregnant belly. After being in California for a month, I found out that I was actually two months pregnant. Gertrude was excited to be a grandma again, but also felt bad for me. We agreed not to tell Joker, especially since he refused all contact with his family anyways. So, even if Gert wanted to tell him, she couldn't. He was still locked up in the asylum. The last I heard, he was being given treatment from a doctor named Harleen Quinzel. They kept him in a straight jacket 24/7 because he was so dangerous.

I went in the house when I saw Killian pull up. I was hoping that he had some good news for me. I recorded my first song last week with the rapper Eminem. The song was written is such a way that it called for a man to do the second part. We decided that we would try this song as a piano ballad mixed with rap and it worked out. I would use this song to open up my ceremony that I was hosting next month. It's a ceremony of people against domestic violence. Killian thought it would be a good idea for me to do it. I didn't really want to share my story, but he thought that it would help get my name out there and help women and men get help if they're in an abusive relationship. I agreed to do it under the condition that I wouldn't name J.

"Rhiannon, I have great news!" Killian shouted, as he walked through the door.

"Yay!! Tell me, tell me!!" I squealed.

"I got you a record deal and your first song, 'Love the Way You Lie' will be playing on the radio." I was so excited! Love the Way You Lie will be a single, and not put on the first official album.

"Oh my gosh! I can't believe my dream is coming true!!" I hugged him. I had already written and recorded all of the songs for my first album. We done a demo album first. Then recorded the first official album with a band. Killian was my producer and band manager. Our band was named Evanescence. (A/N: yes in this story, Evanescence is a brand new band.)

"I'm so happy for you, Rhiannon. We already have a tour date set, too. We're beginning the tour as soon as you recover from having the baby."

"That's awesome, Killian! So happy. Well, I have to get going, or I'll be late for my appointment. I will see you later, and don't forget to pick up Phoenix." I said as I grabbed the keys to the Jeep and walked out the door. I was so nervous and excited at the same time.

Everything was just happening so damn fast. I felt like my life was moving at one hundred miles an hour and I couldn't slow it down. I really didn't think my record deal would happen so fast. When I have this baby, I won't hardly get to see it or Phoenix. My dreams were all coming true, only I was just missing one thing. Him. Nothing made sense anymore without him. I missed him more than words could say. I missed him more than I could fathom. I knew our relationship was toxic, though, and we couldn't be together. He would probably hate me even more than he already does when he finds out about our baby.

I pulled up to the doctor's office and went in. It was the day that I would find out the sex of the baby. I wasn't going to at first, but Gertrude wanted to know so she could come out and paint the nursery and get it ready for the baby. She wouldn't let me help paint. I checked in at the desk and went to sit down and wait.

"Rhiannon Van Tassell?" I looked up to see the nurse waiting on me to go in the back. I followed her to the ultrasound room and got up on the bed. The nurse then exited the room and let the ultrasound technician take over. She didn't say much, she only explained that the gel would be cold and that the pictures might not be very clear so there's no guarantee that it would be accurate. She then tucked the tissue in my pants so that the gel wouldn't get on them. She took many images and we heard the heartbeat. She then took another picture.

"It's a girl, Rhiannon. See?" She pointed out the baby's private parts to show me that it was a little girl.

"I knew it. I just had a feeling." I smiled like a child on Christmas morning. I found out that I was for sure due in early July. I got pregnant sometime in November. The tech wiped me off and helped me up from the bed. I then grabbed my purse and headed back out the door. I scheduled my next appointment for next month and exited the doctor's office and headed home.

+One Month Later+

It was now the night of the Domestic Abuse ceremony. I was getting dressed while I waited on Killian to get back from the airport with Gertrude. She was so excited to see me perform and talk about abusive relationships. I was actually dreading it. I didn't want to do it, but Killian said it would be good if I did, and I listened to him. He knew more about this stuff than I did. I wore a long purple dress and black flats. I didn't even tempt high heels at this point. My ankles swelled too much.

After I was finished getting ready, I got Phoenix ready. Killian pulled up out front and we went outside to meet him.

"Are you ready for this?" He asked.

"Not really." I said nervously.

"Oh honey, you will do great! I believe in you." Gertrude said, stepping out of the car to let me sit in the front.

"Thank you, Gert, for literally everything." I said and hugged her before we all got into the Jeep. We then headed to LA, where the ceremony would be held. There were to be so many celebrities there and some other bands performing as well as me. I was hosting though, and opening the ceremony with my song. I would sing and play the piano, and then when it was time for Eminem's part, he would come out of nowhere.

We pulled up to the venue and went inside through the back. We got Gert and Phoenix to their seats and went backstage. I was so nervous as I looked over the program, it would be televised as well. So, millions would be watching. That made me feel like I was going to throw up. Thankfully I didn't. The producers came out and told us we were on in thirty seconds. Killian took the stage first.

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen. How are we all doing tonight?" He said into the microphone and everyone cheered. "Good, it looks like we have a lively crowd. So, as you all know, this is a program to raise awareness for Domestic Abuse. Tonight we have a great line-up of many bands and artists that you're all very familiar with and some that you've never heard of. Right now, I would like to introduce my best friend, and talented musician, your host, Rhiannon Van Tassell!" Everyone cheered as I waddled my way out to the stage. Killian stepped to the side so that I could take over.

+Joker's P.O.V.+

I laid there on the bed in my cell, waiting for the guard to come get me. It was recreational time, and tonight was TV night. We got to watch an hour of TV of whatever the orderlies decide we had to watch. Unfortunately, it wasn't an option. The guard at that time came and got me and walked me down to the TV room in shackles. He sat me down in the metal folding chair with all the other crazies here. I hated it here more than anything in the world. All I wanted was to be with my love. The only contact I received was from my henchman and none of them could find her. They said her apartment was abandoned. Everything was gone in it. They even checked my mother's home when she was gone for a week. Wherever she was, I knew she knew where Rhiannon was and I wouldn't rest until I found her. the almighty Batman paid me a visit not long ago. He knows where she is, but wouldn't tell me anything. Then again, why would he? I sat there thinking about her and how when I used that stupid doctor to escape here, I would go find her. The orderly, named George, turned on the TV and told us we're watching VH1 tonight. It was better than last week when we were forced to watch Full House by the fucktard orderly named Chuck. I was pretty sure he was either homosexual, or was just really feminine. When the TV came on, the first face I saw was my piece of shit, brother. Killian. What the fuck is he doing on TV??

"Right now, I would like to introduce my best friend, and talented musician, your host, Rhiannon Van Tassell!" He began clapping and stepped to the side as she walked out on to the stage. I watched as Rhiannon walked out on the stage. Well, more like waddled seeing as how she's pregnant....wait..pregnant???!!! I felt myself beginning to rage inside. That motherfucker knocked up my woman! He ran away with her. I was definitely killing him now. I sat there and listened to her talk, growing more and more angry by the moment. I tried to keep my cool so I could keep watching and not get sedated and thrown back in my cell. She talked about domestic abuse and how it was bad and everything. She was talking about me. Stupid bitch, she asked for it most of the time. When she was done talking, a piano was brought out on stage and she sat down to play.

"I wrote this song when I was in an abusive relationship with a man that I still love, but I knew I had to walk away." She said and then began playing.

On the first page of our story
The future seemed so bright
Then this thing turned out so evil
I don’t know why I’m still surprised
Even angels have their wicked schemes
And you take that to new extremes
But you’ll always be my hero
Even though you’ve lost your mind

[Chorus:]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that’s all right because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that’s all right because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
Oh, I love the way you lie

Now there’s gravel in our voices
Glass is shattered from the fight
In this tug of war you’ll always win
Even when I’m right
‘Cause you feed me fables from your hand
With violent words and empty threats
And it’s sick that all these battles
Are what keeps me satisfied

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that’s all right because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that’s all right because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
Oh, I love the way you lie

So maybe I’m a masochist
I try to run but I don’t wanna ever leave
'Til the walls are goin’ up
In smoke with all our memories

[Eminem]
It's morning, you wake, a sun ray hits your face
Smeared makeup as we lay in the wake of destruction
Hush baby, speak softly, tell me you're awfully sorry
That you pushed me into the coffee table last night
So I can push you off me
Try and touch me so I can scream at you not to touch me
Run out the room and I’ll follow you like a lost puppy
Baby, without you I’m nothing, I’m so lost, hug me
Then tell me how ugly I am, but that you’ll always love me
Then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the
Destructive path that we’re on, two psychopaths but we
Know that no matter how many knives we put in each other’s backs
That we’ll have each other’s backs, ’cause we’re that lucky
Together, we move mountains, let’s not make mountains out of molehills,
You hit me twice, yeah, but who’s countin’?
I may have hit you three times, I’m startin’ to lose count
But together, we’ll live forever, we found the youth fountain
Our love is crazy, we’re nuts, but I refuse counsellin’
This house is too huge, if you move out I’ll burn all two thousand
Square feet of it to the ground, ain’t shit you can do about it
'Cause with you I’m in my fuckin’ mind, without you I’m out it

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that’s all right because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that’s all right because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
Oh, I love the way you lie

I love the way you lie [3x]

Everyone cheered at the end of the song. I couldn't believe that she wrote that song about us. She left the stage with Killian and the Eminem guy then there were other bands that played and celebrities who talked about domestic abuse. It was finally the end of the show and time for my session with the doc. The orderly walked me down to my session and I sat at the desk across from her. We talked for a long time and finally I simply told her that I needed a machine gun so I could break out and take her with me. I was going to get the fuck out of here and find my woman. Wherever she was.

+Rhiannon's P.O.V.+

I woke up the next morning to my house phone ringing. Anyone that couldn't get a hold of me on my cell phone would call the house phone for emergencies.

"Hello?" I mumbled.

"Rhiannon, it's Killian. I had to leave early this morning to go pick Bruce up from the airport. We have got a serious issue. Get dressed, we will talk when I get back with Bruce." Killian said with urgency in his voice.

"Killian, what is this about? You know this is an emergency line." I said, irritated that he woke me up just to tell me that.

"No, Rhiannon, this is an emergency. Get up and I will explain when we get there. We're leaving LAX right now. We will be there in 40 minutes." He said and hung up. Rude much? Nonetheless, I got up and dragged my ass downstairs to find Gertrude cooking. Thank god. I was starving somethin awful.

"Gertrude, please tell me you're cooking peanut butter and chocolate pancakes and spicy bacon??" I said as I slunk down in the kitchen chair.

"Yes, of course. You know I know what you like. I have to keep up with your cravings." She smiled. I loved this woman to death. I didn't see how J could ever turn away from here, vat of acid or not.

"So, Gertrude, what's the big emergency?" I asked as I stuffed my mouth with spicy bacon.

"I don't know, they wouldn't tell me either. All Killian would tell me is that he had to tell us both in person. It must be really important for Bruce to fly out here from Gotham on short notice." Even Gert was concerned and if she's concerned then I'm scared. Me and Phoenix and Gert ate breakfast and sat down and watched The Andy Griffith show until Killian and Bruce got home. They came flying into the house like bats out of hell. Haha. Bats. I made a funny.

"Hey, little guy, why don't you go play in the arcade while we talk to mommy and granny?" Killian said to Phoenix. Phoenix started calling Gertrude granny about three months ago. Phoenix obeyed and went to go play in the game room.

"What the hell is this about, Killian?" I asked.

"It's the Joker. He's escaped from Arkham. He had help from his doctor. He has manipulated her and he's now free. He escaped late last night and I got on the phone with Killian and flew out here as soon as they told me. This is serious business. You're not safe if he's out." Bruce explained.

"Bruce, he doesn't even know where Killian lives. He can't find me as long as I'm out here in California." I said.

"It may take him awhile, but if I know anything about Joker, it's that he always finds his target. Right now, Rhiannon, you're his target."

"How do you know that, Bruce? It's been 7 months now. There's no way he even cares anymore."

"I know, because I have his case files and I have read every paper in this file." Bruce held up a file that said 'confidential' on the front of it. "In every one of his sessions with the doctor he talks about you and finding you. There are papers in here stating who has visited him and when and what was said in the visitation rooms with the visitors. He didn't know that all of it was recorded in a camera and written down on paper. He's had his men out looking for you since he got put in there. You're not safe as long as he's out and right now nobody knows where he is." Bruce explained.

"So, basically, I'm a sitting duck. He's going to find me eventually. That's inevitable. If it happens, we will deal with it. I'm not going to run all the time and just keep running. If or when he finds me, I'll deal with him. I'm not afraid of him."

"Honey, you're pregnant. You have to be careful." Gertrude said.

"I know, but I don't think he will hurt me while I'm pregnant with his kid. Don't worry, I'll be careful, but until then, I'm living my life. I'm not going to keep looking over my shoulder."

"Alright, if that's what you want to do. I'll keep tabs on him in Gotham though. If we ever find him. For all we know, he's already on his way here."

"Well, I'm not going to worry about it."

+Joker's P.O.V.+

Since I broke out with Doctor Quinzel, I have been laying low. I had to figure out my next move. I had to find her. My men had been searching for seven months now. I was going crazy without her.

"Boss! Boss! We got something! We got a lead!" Will came running to me like a mad man.

"Well what is it? Did you find her!?"

"We haven't found her exactly, but we did find out that that show she was on was recorded in Los Angeles and I called the people there and they said that she just signed a record deal with a label there. They said it was called Wind-Up records. I got their business hours, boss. If we leave tonight, we could fly there and be there by tomorrow." Will explained.

"Good job, Will. There's a reason why you're my favorite." With that, I grabbed my bags and loaded up the Escalade. "Harley, we're going on an adventure." Harley jumped up like the crazy thing she's become and followed me out the door.

I was going to find my baby, and nobody was going to stop me.