Dear God, I Left Her When I Found Her

When we finally arrived at the beach, all the guy's cars were already there. This was the old spot we had always went to, and I was guessing that Michelle had told them about me bringing my daughter there. And they were all probably eager to see how much alike we were.

I say Jimmy and Matt lifting a huge ice chest from Jimmy's pick up. Uh-oh. They did not bring andy beer with them. They better not have.

I didn't think Michelle and Tanya drank, but then again, they were teenagers. At least when I was a teen I would kill for some liquor. But I was completely expected to consume large amounts of alcohol even from a young age.

I glanced at Michelle, my daughter. She was really skinny. I was never a thin guy. I was either in shape or not. Alejandra was petite and curvy. Most guys dated her just for her body. I'll admit, so did I at first. That's when I figured out there was much more to her than her boobs. Which was saying something for a fourteen year old boy.

"Hey, look!" Tanya said excitedly. "There's that hot piece of action."

I say Zacky come bounding down the beach hand in hand with Gena. Oh, great. Here comes the drama.

"And look at the buxom blonde with him." Michelle pointed out.

Tanya gave Michelle a wide eyed look. "Have you lost your boy-loving mind?! Please don't tell me you've just turned lesbo on me. This is a really bad time to do so. Your dad has really hot guy friends. Besides, how can you look at her when you can look at him?!"

Michelle shook her head and rolled her eyes.

We made our way to the group. They all gathered around, and Jimmy, of course, didn't waste anytime with introductions.

"Damn, Haner," Jimmy started, looking at kid-Michelle. "I told you the pull-out method doesn't work! Its just a government scam." He walked over to Michelle and patted her head. "Hello, Little Haner. You're pretty attractive for being spawned by that space alien."

"Jimmy!" Michelle, my girlfriend yelled. Her, Val, and Matt ran over. "Are you trying to tell her that Brian was the E.T. inspiration?"

"Of course not, Mother Number Three. I would never spread such lies." Jimmy told her as adult-Michelle walked over to me and wrapped an arm around my waste.

Val ignored Jimmy and walked past him to stand in front of kid-Michelle. "Hi, Michelle. Its nice to meet you. And hopefully you'll stay long enough for us to get to know you before Jimmy scares you off. With his tales of American Concentration camps and whatnot."

Jimmy shook his head. "Mother Number Two, there are concentration camps, human fusion facilities, and Area 51. There's no harm in being prepared!"

"Are any of those things a real danger?" Michelle, my girlfriend, asked.

"Real danger." Jimmy scoffed. "As real as my aluminum underwear."

That's Jimmy Sullivan for you.