Status: on hiatus (1/5/2018)

When Hearts Collide

The Fear Has Gripped Me But Here I Go

After what felt like a lifetime of waiting, the day of Caleb and Heather's wedding had finally arrived.

Charlie was relieved, to some degree, that the climax of her trip was finally upon her. She awoke early that morning, far earlier than necessary. Upon looking out her bedroom window, she felt her spirits soar. The morning sun was only just beginning to reveal itself behind the line of trees on the horizon. A beautiful palette of tangerine and fuschia exploded across the sky. Transfixed, Charlie decided it was best that she go for a walk down to the water to truly enjoy the breath-taking sunrise.

Quietly, she grabbed some clothes from her duffle and crept into the bathroom, so as not to wake Nora. Charlie dropped her pyjama shorts and pulled on a pair of black, fitted yoga shorts. She slipped into a sports bra and pulled on a loose-fitted tank top. After tying her hair up into a sloppy bun, Charlie headed downstairs. The main floor was silent.

Charlie took it upon herself to start the coffee before slipping into flip-flops and making her way out the back door. The air was already warm and humid, as promised in the forecast. She inhaled deeply, filling her lungs with fresh air.

Her flimsy shoes slapped against the dewy ground as she tromped through the vegetable gardens. Bits of dirt clung to the backs of her calves. Charlie smiled as she approached the water, surprised to find the surface as still as glass. She plopped down into the sand. Kicking off her flip-flops, she buried her toes into the gritty sand. From overhead, a few early birds squawked back and forth as they retreated to their nest in the trees.

Charlie felt a deep sense of serenity within.

As she carved through the surface of the sand with her fingertip, she couldn't help but reflect on the night before. Things with Jamie had finally reached a point of stability. Even if she still had a lot of lost time to make up for, Charlie felt that things had truly shifted. She was hopeful. She trusted that today would go without any emotional hitches. She even meditated on it for the first time in months.

Nothing would ruin her brother's special day.

Not even the gnawing pit in her stomach when she imagined seeing her grandparents for the first time in years. Charlie swallowed hard, eyes wandering across the smooth surface of the lake. She had been dreading this day not only because of her past with Jamie - but because of the complicated nature of her relationship with the rest of her family. No one had stayed in contact with Charlie after the move, nor had she bothered to contact them. Grandparents. Aunts and uncles. From both sides of her family.

With a sigh, Charlie leaned back onto her elbows. Her joints sunk into the sand. She continued to admire the rising sun, noticing as the sky began to transform into a bright azure. The sun showered her with warmth as it rose above the trees.

Having lost track of time, Charlie returned to the house to find the rest of her family packed into the kitchen, cramming breakfast sandwiches and hash browns into their mouths. Someone had made a morning McDonald's run.

"Didn't know what you wanted," Her father addressed her, handing her a sandwich wrapped in yellow paper. "So I got you a McMuffin."

"That's great, yeah," She smiled.

Nora handed her a hashbrown.

"Where were you?" Her cousin asked.

"Down at the beach," Charlie explained with a gentle shrug. "I couldn't get back to sleep so I thought maybe a walk, some meditation, and a little yoga were in order."

"Yeah, you've definitely been living out west too long," Nathan laughed hoarsely. Nick joined him.

Charlie rolled her eyes and retreated to her bedroom. Nora followed her, nibbling on her McGriddle and hashbrown. After wiping off her greasy hands, Charlie pulled her dress from out of her duffle. With a sigh, she laid it on her bed over the wrinkled mess of blankets.

"That's... beautiful," Nora murmured, mouth full of partially chewed food.

"Let's hope it looks as beautiful on me as it does on my bed," Charlie joked.

When she was done eating, Charlie took a shower. She tried to visualize how the wedding would play out, how the interactions would unfold. She tried to imagine what the rest of her family would say, trying to prepare herself for the inevitable. As soon as she was done, Charlie wrapped herself in a towel and vacated the bathroom. Nora rushed in, starting up the shower immediately after.

Charlie seized the opportunity to pull on her underwear for the evening. Instead of pulling on her dress right away, she instead wrapped herself in a black, satin robe. While Nora showered, Charlie dried her hair and began curling it. She trusted that Nora would help her with the strands she had a hard time reaching; for that, she was grateful.

When Nora emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around herself, Charlie looked over and smiled.

"Y'know... I'm really glad you're here, Nora,"

Nora looked up from her suitcase, a smile spreading across her lips.

"I'm just as glad that you're here," She told Charlie. "This would have been one long, strange weekend had you of stayed in California."

"Agreed," Charlie nodded.

Nora busied herself with her suitcase and Charlie returned to her hair.

"So... you sleeping with Jamie tonight, or what-"

"Nora!" Charlie hissed, head practically spinning in her direction. Nora was grinning devilishly, holding a brush and a blow dryer in her hands.

"What?" Her cousin shrugged. "It's a fair question."

Charlie rolled her eyes, returning her focus to her hair.

"I'm not sleeping with him," She grumbled. "It wouldn't solve anything."

"I bet it would solve everything," Nora laughed, inching closer to the doorway. "After all, the sexual tension between you two is so thick, you could probably slice it with a knife."

"Sexual tension?" Charlie squeaked. She could feel her cheeks flushing red.

"I'll be waiting to say I told you so tomorrow morning," Nora winked before slipping out of the bedroom, darting into the bathroom yet again. The blow dryer fired up and the conversation was temporarily dropped.

Charlie sucked in a deep breath, setting down the curling iron. She stared in the mirror at her wide curls and her sunkissed face. Regardless of what her cousins seemed to think was best, Charlie knew that getting tangled in the sheets with Jamie would only lead to trouble. Kissing was one thing but having sex was on another level. She knew that their situation was volatile.

Charlie did her best to avoid the topic as she and Nora finished getting ready. They helped each other with their hair and make-up, before finally helping one another into their dresses for the evening. Nora looked stunning in a tawny, metallic gown with a fitted bodice and a floor-sweeping, pleated skirt. The lightweight fabric swirled around her frame like something out of a dream. On her feet, she wore strappy black heels with crisscrossing straps that Charlie helped her fasten.

Charlie, on the other hand, opted for a shorter cocktail style dress. The pale blue dress ended just above her knees. Both the neckline and the back of the dress were cut low, showing off her tanned skin. There was navy blue and golden, metallic designs on the pale fabric, leaving the dress looking like marble. Paired with a set of golden heels, Nora assured her cousin that she looked something like a Grecian goddess.

Once they were ready, Nora and Charlie headed downstairs. Bill Briggs was sitting at the kitchen table, staring into the bottom of his coffee cup. He looked up as the ladies entered the room, a smile lighting up his face.

"My, my, my," Bill sang. "You two look absolutely beautiful."

"Thanks, Uncle Bill," Nora smiled. "You look rather dashing yourself."

In his fitted, dark grey suit with a sage green button down, Bill certainly looked refined. He finished the last of his coffee and stood, straightening out his freshly pressed suit.

"Where's the rest of the motley crew?" Charlie asked, noticing the absence of Uncle Harvey, Nathan, and Nick.

"They left about five minutes ago," Her father informed her, shrugging his shoulders. "They were saying something about... needing more booze."

"Oh God," Nora rolled her eyes. "I guess it really isn't a true Briggs' wedding until someone ends up in the hospital, eh?"

The three of them laughed as they left the kitchen, heading for the front door. Charlie made sure to double-check her clutch for her phone and her lipstick before heading to her father's truck. Nora, on the other hand, carried a tote bag with a change of clothes for both herself and Charlie. As they would be sharing a hotel room for the night, the cousins figured they would pack lightly together.

Bill helped his companions into the truck, eyeing the pencil-thin heels of their shoes as they climbed into the back seat. Once Nora and Charlie were settled in, he climbed into the driver's seat. He stuffed the keys in the ignition, inhaling sharply. It was hard for Bill to fully process the fact that the wedding had finally arrived. All of his planning and patience was about to pay off.

"Everybody ready?" Bill asked, stealing a glance of his daughter in the rearview mirror. He felt his heart swell with joy as they shared a smile in the reflective glass.

"As ready as we'll ever be," Nora piped up.

Feeling the truck backing up, Charlie noticed her stomach began to churn. She pursed her lips together, staring down at the dainty, black clutch in her hands. As in meditation, Charlie tried to focus on steadying her breathing, hoping it would ease her nerves and settle her stomach.

Today was for celebrating. Though Charlie knew much of her family would be present at the wedding, whether they were expecting an explanation from her or not, she couldn't let it deter her from enjoying Caleb's special day. She could only hope that the rest of the guests felt the same. Charlie didn't want to steal the attention from her brother and Heather; she simply wanted to enjoy being present with her family.

No emotional hiccups, Charlie reminded herself.

"So, the hotel is attached to the reception hall?" Nora asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah," Bill answered from the front of the cab. "So once everyone is all good and liquored up, all you gotta do is stagger on over to the hotel."

"I feel sorry for whoever is working tomorrow," Nora snickered, looking to Charlie. "The place is going to be trashed."

"I'll be sure to do my part," Charlie giggled. "I'll aim for the toilet."

"That's my girl," Bill roared with laughter.

The rest of the drive was filled with classic rock and sporadic chatter. Charlie kept to herself, eyes flickering out the window often. As the truck pulled into the small, already crammed parking lot of the church, Charlie felt her heart sink. She recognized a few vehicles - mainly the trucks that belonged to Uncle Harvey, Caleb, and Jamie. Most of the cars were decorated with fake, plastic flowers. Cans were fastened to the rear bumper of Caleb's truck.

The sound of the truck door opening caught Charlie's attention. She watched Nora slide from the backseat. With a gulp, Charlie followed her lead. She stepped down from the truck, smoothing out the creases in her dress.

"Hey," Bill spoke softly, his hand gingerly reaching for Charlie's. She looked up at her father, finding comfort and solace in his eyes. "You okay, kiddo?"

"I'm... fine," She nodded, lying through all but clenched teeth. Bill smiled.

"You have every right to be here," He told her. "I hope you... you know that."

"Thanks, Dad," Charlie forced a soft smile.

"And you look absolutely beautiful, honey," He assured her, giving her hand a squeeze before letting go. "You've got nothing to worry about, alright?"

"Right," She nodded.

"You guys coming?" Nora asked from the end of the truck, her hands finding her hips.

"Wouldn't miss it," Bill fired back, falling into step with his daughter and his niece. Together, the three of them cut through the busy parking lot, making their way up the few steps into the church.

Inside, the cozy church was a flurry of commotion. People were talking, hugging, laughing. The pews were quickly filling up as more guests arrived. Charlie followed her cousin down the narrow aisle, taking a seat in the second row off to the left side of the church. Bill, on the other hand, took a seat at the front of the room in the row ahead. He took his place between his parents and his once in-laws. They all greeted him with smiles.

"Your man looks mighty fine up there," Nora said, stealing Charlie's attention.

Immediately, her brown eyes flickered to the front of the room. The groomsmen were standing off to the side of the altar, talking and laughing among themselves. Jamie stood out like a sexy, swollen thumb, his dimpled smile radiating pure light. His fitted suit left little to the imagination while the earthy green of his dress shirt seemed to compliment his beautiful blue eyes. Charlie felt a flutter in her belly and a twinge of warmth between her legs.

Jamie's eyes darted away from his company, his gaze snagging hers. His soft lips pulled together into a crooked smirk, dimples and all. Charlie cast him a small wave, her heart thumping wildly in her chest.

"And... you're sure sleeping with him won't fix things?" Nora whispered, leaning in towards Charlie.

"I'm sure," She replied, eyes unable to look away from Jamie. Charlie felt the blood beginning to rush to her cheeks. With a sigh, she managed to tear her eyes away, finally facing Nora. Needless to say, her cousin didn't look convinced.

"We'll see what you have to say about it after a little gin," Nora teased.

Charlie rolled her eyes.
♠ ♠ ♠
Sorry that this has taken me so long to post! I was on a roll for a while there. However, dealing with depression is never cut and dry. Writing has helped me overcome sadness before.. but forcing myself to generate content often backfires.

I'm feeling better, more stable, and, despite the recent, unexpected changes in life, I'm still feeling capable.

Thanks for being patient and thank you, new readers and OGs, for supporting this story! Your feedback is always appreciated.

- M

Title Credit: Breezeblocks - alt-J