Too Scared to Love Again

“L! Are you good to go?” Blair asked, her heavy curls swaying behind her shoulders.

Blair was dressed in a pink satin top, a black pencil skirt and boots that reached her knees. Her hair had been curled her lips decorated in a dark pink lipstick that brought attention to her face.

“I’ve been ready for an hour!” Lynn announced, snatching her leather jacket from her bed and approaching the living room.

“Look at her!” Blair stood up from the couch, brushing her hands down her skirt. “You look fucking bomb!”

“Oh, really? I thought I looked a little overdressed.” the brunette dropped teasingly, meanwhile Blair only rolled her eyes.

Lynn was dressed in a pair of loose jeans, platform Dr. Martens and an off-shoulder black top that merely met the waistband of her jeans. Her hair had been tied into a rather high ponytail, and the brunette had for once bothered to put on some makeup.

“C!” Blair called through the apartment. “We gotta go!”

“I’m coming!” Cynthia all but snared down the hall, as she hated to hurry when she was straightening her thick blonde hair.

“I can’t believe we convinced you go to come!” Blair admitted, wrapping an arm around Lynn’s shoulders, meanwhile the three of them made it towards the elevator.

“I didn’t exactly have much of a choice.” Lynn pointed out, rolling her eyes at the way both Cynthia and Blair were smiling.

“You’re gonna have so much fun tonight!” Cynthia beamed, just as she rubbed her dark red lipstick over her bottom lip.

The three of them made it towards the parking lot, Lynn claiming her seat behind the wheel, meanwhile Blair squeezed herself into the back, already demanding what music she wanted Cynthia to turn on.

Lynn buckled her seatbelt, gripping the leather wheel tightly in her hands and then driving away from the almost empty parking lot.

“God! Zee looks so good in his shirt!” Blair almost moaned in the back, which made Lynn and Cynthia exchange a rather disturbed look.

“I never thought that listening to someone say that about my favourite band would make me so nauseous.” the blonde admitted.

“Blair can make anyone nauseous with her talk.” Lynn retorted.

“Guys, come on! He’s a hot piece!” Blair groaned at her friends.

“Of course he is, but I don’t need to listen to you moaning about it!” Cynthia whined at her friend.

“And I would rather not listen to this conversation at all!” Lynn added, turning up the sound of Stone Sour, as the car reached the parking lot where they were meeting the guys.

“Now I actually regret encouraging Jimmy to gather the guys. You two totally need that workout.” Cynthia said to Blair, wrestling her seatbelt, as she saw the dark-haired drummer.

Both Lynn and Blair exchanged a look at the way Cynthia looked at Jimmy, before she snatched her bag and climbed out of the car. The two of them decided to brush it off, knowing that they would probably get their question answered in time, as they too joined the blonde woman.

“You smell so fucking good!” Zack announced to his girlfriend, already wrapping his arms around her hips and feeling her soft lips against his.

“Yuck!” Cynthia all but groaned from next to Jimmy, grimacing while groaning.

“Lynn, you came!” Val quipped rather happily, as the blonde woman walked over to the brunette and slipped her arms around her petite body.

“You look good!” Lynn smiled at the woman, who soon let go of her.

“Girl! You too!” she smirked, before Matt came to her side.

“It’s good to see you!” the almost bold singer announced, a gentle smile curving his thin lips as his dimples popped up in his face.

“Well, Cynthia and Blair didn’t exactly give me much of a choice.” the brunette told him, slipping her hands into the pockets of her jeans.

“Jeez, stop bitching!” Cynthia snapped at her friend, which caused the drummer to start laughing.

“Let’s start drinking!” Johnny announced, Rebecca right by his side with his arm tugged around her waist.

“Amen to that, man!” Zack said.

Soon the group of people made their way towards the bar, the sound of music approaching them all but instantly, as Brian lead the way towards a table in the back of the bar, just like the boys liked it.

The bar was already packed, and the dance floor being no exception as well. Lynn squeezed herself in between Brian and Johnny, with Matt and Val sitting across from her. At the end of the booth sat Blair and Zack, both of them already drooling over one another, meanwhile Cynthia and Jimmy had taken off to order drinks, not even asking what people wanted.

“I swear to God! Jimmy’s falling for her!” Val pointed out to her husband, who only shook his head at her.

“I don’t know if I buy that!” Matt argued.

“Oh, please!” his wife snorted. “It’s so fucking obvious! Are you blind?” she cocked her eyebrow at him, soon nudging his ribcage, meanwhile he kept refusing it.

“What are they ordering?” Lynn asked Brian, who had been remarkably quiet so far.

“If Jimmy gets to decide, you should expect lots of shots.” the guitarist mused.

“I bet that’s no match for a bartender!” Johnny chuckled, poking the brunette.

“I actually started drinking less after I started working at Dreams.” Lynn confessed to everyone’s surprise.

“And thank God for that!” Blair pointed out from the other end of the table.

“Fuck you!” Lynn groaned at her.

“Is there something we should know?” Matt wiggled his eyebrows at the two women.

“Lynn used to be a fucking party animal!” Blair said, pointing a finger at the brunette.

“Seriously?” Johnny uttered.

“It was intense!” Rebecca joined.

“It wasn’t that bad!” Lynn barged at her co-workers.

“Oh, baby, it was!” Cynthia chuckled, as she and Jimmy had returned to the table.

“Seriously? I’d never thought that.” Brian admitted to the brunette, whose face was turning scarlet.

“What can I say? There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.” she replied almost teasingly.

“Oh, I can imagine.” Brian dropped back, his lips curling into his signature smirk.

Their drinks arrived soon enough, as Jimmy announced that it was more to come. Both Cynthia and Jimmy settled down, the two of them giggling as they drowned their shots and demanded that everyone else did the same. Rebecca was already shaking her head at the blonde woman, as she grabbed a shot from the trail and drowned it effortlessly.

“Jimmy’s not gonna survive this evening.” Johnny reassured the pink-haired woman next to him, his hand landing on top of her bare thigh, as she chuckled.

“Oh, I can imagine. Cynthia’s a big drinker.” Rebecca announced.

“Not in the unhealthy way, though!” Blair added from the other couch.

“That depends on what she’s celebrating!” the pink-haired woman responded, to which Blair chuckled.

“Gates! Shots!” Jimmy urged from his seat, just as the waitress placed another round of shots down at the table.

“Not happening, dude! I’m gonna order a beer!” the guitarist said to his friend, hands raised, meanwhile he slid out of the booth.

“Weak!” Jimmy growled at him.

“Wanna come?” Brian offered Lynn, after he had rolled his eyes at the dark-haired drummer.

“Right now I’d do anything to escape those two.” Lynn announced back, as she grabbed her wallet and chased after the dark-haired guitarist.

“They’re an interesting pair.” Brian admitted under his breath, chuckling as it was Lynn’s turn to roll her eyes.

“Do I have to remind you that she recently broke up with her boyfriend?” she wiggled her eyebrows at him, the two of them soon reaching the counter.

“I’m not insinuating anything!” Brian told her, before he fished for his wallet.

“You could be! You surprise me all the time.” Lynn pointed out, soon earning a curious look from his face.

“Really?” he cocked an eyebrow at her.

“All the time,” she confirmed. “You aren’t exactly an open book, Haner.”

“Well, I guess we have something in common then after all.”

“Who would’ve thought?” Lynn shook her head, the guitarist chuckling at her comment once again.

“Excuse me, ma’am?” a rather drunk voice spoke from behind, as the brunette turned around, spotting a ginger-haired man who looked like he was about her age.

“Yes?” Lynn replied rather nonchalantly, looking at the way he was dragging his eyes from her face and down her slim spine.

“Let me buy you a drink.” the man offered, a slick smirk hanging on his pale lips.

“No, thank you. I’m fine.” Lynn reassured the man, turning around to face Brian, just as the man wrapped his fingers around her wrist, holding her in a firm grip.

“Come on!” the man insisted.

“She said she’s fine.” Brian stated firmly, his hand all but jerking the man’s grip off of Lynn’s wrist, as she soon stepped behind Brian, allowing him to create some distance.

“Oh, I’m sorry, dude! Didn’t know she had a boyfriend!” the man rose his hands up in surrender, making Lynn roll her eyes to the point where she was convinced they would disappear into her hairline.

“That’s an honest mistake. Now, leave us alone.” the guitarist simply replied, not even denying that Lynn was his girlfriend, as the man grabbed his drink and did as he was told.

“Jesus, that pig,” Brian sighed, rubbing his temple with his rigid fingertips. “Are you okay?” he asked, looking over at Lynn, who looked rather unimpressed.

“Once again saved by Haner.” she simply stated, her lips soon curling into a smile, as he nudged her.

“I’m trying to be friendly!” Brian insisted. “But in all seriousness, are you okay? Jesus, it must be so fucking annoying when that happens.”

“It is,” Lynn confirmed. “Not that it happens often though.”

“I hardly doubt that.” Brian snorted, shaking his head at her.

“What?” Lynn narrowed her eyes at him. “Why?”

“I’m a man.” Brian stated.

“Unfortunately.” she replied quickly.

“I know how men think when they’re hitting up women at clubs.” Brian told her.

“Oh, yeah?” Lynn cocked her eyebrows at him.

“It means they think you’re hot.” Brian told her, sounding as though he was speaking to someone who had no clue about these things.

“Well, then I guess he doesn’t have the best taste.” Lynn chuckled.

“What do you mean?”

“Are you serious? Look around! There’s a lot of gorgeous women here!” she said to him, making Brian look around the place for the first time that evening.

“Yeah, and so? You’re not exactly bad-looking, Evans.” Brian nudged her rather playfully.

“Oh, stop it!” Lynn groaned, her cheeks instantly catching heat. “I’m not saying that, but there’s a lot of great women here!”

“And maybe you’re one of them!” Brian added.

“Okay, let’s drop this!” Lynn insisted, her entire face turning scarlet by the way the guitarist was complimenting her.

“Oh, are you blushing?” he said mockingly, gently brushing a stray of hair out of her face, taking in the sight of her heated cheeks again.

“Stop it!” Lynn hissed, stabbing his ribcage with the tip of her elbow.

The brunette soon met his gaze, suddenly realizing that the man was actually admiring her. Brian had one hand on top of the counter, meanwhile his body was placed inches from hers. Lynn picked up the scent of cologne mixed with cigarette, and could even feel his cool breath that rolled over her face, sending goose bumps along her bare arms.

“Is this the moment you say I look stunning tonight?” Lynn dropped rather dramatically, watching as Brian narrowed his eyes at her, trying to hide behind his façade.

“Shut up, Evans!” he replied, slapping her shoulder. “Let’s buy beer.”

“It totally is!” Lynn mouthed, the guitarist rolling his eyes at her as he ordered two beers to the bartender.

The two of them waited by the counter for their drinks, both of them noticing how Jimmy and Cynthia had left the booth and explored the dance floor. The blonde had grabbed his hands, soon allowing her body to work its way along with the beat, meanwhile the dark-haired man had his hands around her hips.

Brian sniggered at the sight of the two of them, just as Lynn nudged him once again, knowing exactly what was going through the man’s head.

“Don’t even think about it!” she told him, narrowing her eyes, as she took another swig from her beer.

“You can’t deny it!” Brian argued, pointing a finger at her, meanwhile she rolled her eyes at him.

“You’re delusional!” Lynn insisted.

“That’s a way of thanking the guy who just bought you a drink!”

“Oh, please! As though I haven’t bought drinks for you?” Lynn cocked her eyebrows, obviously referring to the free beers he had gotten at her work.

“Okay, I guess I’ll give you that.” Brian mumbled, obviously not happy to admit it.

“That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” Lynn told him, a slick smirk decorating her lips.

“Are you fucking mental? A couple of minutes ago, I said you were good looking!” Brian groaned at the woman.

“Ops!” Lynn chuckled, almost forgetting it.

“Jesus, you really are something, Evans!” Brian shook his head. “Come on, I wanna have a smoke!” he said, circling his fingers around her wrist and pulling her after him.

The two of them had finished their drinks by the time they emerged outside, both of them noticing that their booth was almost completely empty. The brunette watched as the guitarist drew a cigarette from his package and placed it between his lips.

Lynn soaked her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket, feeling the chilly wind, meanwhile Brian lit up his cigarette, instantly taking a long drag. The brunette wrinkled a little at the familiar smell, which made Brian chuckle a little.

“Sure you don’t want one?” he asked all but teasingly, to which Lynn flashed her middle finger.

“Fuck you!” she stuck her tongue out, which made Brian chuckle, as he tapped the end of his cigarette.

“Why aren’t you dancing inside?” Brian suddenly asked, once again looking over at the brunette, who was now dolling with her hair.

“Do you really need to ask?” Lynn chuckled. “Do I look like a dancer?” she placed her hands on her waist, her eyebrows hanging high on her forehead.

“No, not really,” Brian sniggered. “But I had to ask!” he added.

“What’s your excuse?” she fired back. “I mean, don’t you love a good body close to yours?”

The words all but rambled out of her lips, as the brunette suddenly realized that she had had a little too much to drink at this point. Brian only laughed at her reaction, realizing that she was way too drunk to notice what she had just said.

“I’m too old for that shit!” he waved his hand and then tapped the cigarette once again, ash darting from the butt of it.

“Too old? You’re not even older than us!” Lynn pointed out, looking just slightly offended. “Are you calling me old?”

“Maybe?” Brian chuckled. “No, but seriously. When you’ve been on the road for fucking decades hooking up with women on the dance floor gets a little old.” he confessed.

“Or have you been rejected?” Lynn wiggled her eyebrows at him.

“What? No!” he frowned back.

“Never?”

“I’m Synyster Gates!” Brian said, sounding ridiculously like Chuck Bass.

“Doesn’t mean you can’t be rejected!” Lynn pointed out.

“Oh, honey, it does.” he sniggered.

Lynn shook her head, just as the door was opened and a very drunk Rebecca stepped out, closely followed by Johnny, who had grabbed a cigarette himself.

“There you guys are!” Rebecca half-slurred, as she swung her arms around Lynn’s neck and pushed her in for a hug.

“And here I thought she was drunk!” Brian chuckled at the sight of Rebecca, who nearly tackled her friend to the ground, as Lynn tried her best to hold her up.

“I’m not drunk!” Lynn hissed.

“Sure.” he replied mockingly.

“You haven’t killed him yet. I’m very surprised.” Johnny told the brunette and then took a long drag from his smoke, before glancing over at Rebecca, who was currently nuzzling her face into the crook of Lynn’s neck.

“Me too.” Lynn admitted.

“Ey! We were having fun! Admit it!” Brian groaned at the woman. “I even bought you a beer!”

“Don’t tell him you had fun, Lynn. It’ll feed his ego.” Johnny warned, as his friend shot him a nasty glare.

“Fuck off, Short Shit!” Brian flipped his friend off.

“Oh, but Brian’s a good person!” Rebecca announced, as she decided to let go of Lynn and let Johnny grab a hold of her instead.

“Oh, really?” Johnny sniggered, speaking with his cigarette dangling from his lips.

“Yeah, really! He helped me out here the other day!” Rebecca announced.

“What was that about?” Lynn asked, shifting her gaze from between Brian and Rebecca.

“That was nothing!” Brian added quickly.

“Oh, don’t be so fucking humble!” Rebecca slurred. “Gerard paid us a little visit, and we kicked him out together. Right, Brian?” the pink-haired woman said, Johnny’s cigarette resting between her fingers, meanwhile she expected a high-five from the now awkward guitarist.

Gerard.

Lynn completely zoned out of the conversation, anxiety building up in the lower part of her stomach, as she clenched her fists, trying to prevent herself from giving into the fear that was now soaking up inside her body.

“Okay, Rebecca, maybe we should go inside.” Johnny suggested, noticing how Lynn suddenly looked utterly uncomfortable, even though he had no idea why,

“Brian’s a good guy, L! He’s a keeper!” Rebecca said, before the bassist had to company her to the door.

Brian looked at Lynn, who hadn’t uttered something in a while. Her entire face looked stern, and the lights behind her eyes had vanished, making it look as though it never existed in the first place. The guitarist was unsure what to say. He was still unsure what had happened between Lynn and her previous fiancée, and was therefore unaware of how she would react by the mentioning of his cousin.

“Lynn, are you okay?” Brian asked, his voice as soft as velvet, before he placed a loving hand on her shoulder.

“Did you know?” she suddenly snapped back to reality.

“Know what?” he asked.

“You knew the entire time, didn’t you? Is that why you’re being all nice? Is that why you came to my apartment?”

“Lynn, what the fuck are you talking about?” Brian asked, still as confused as before.

“You think I’m a fragile fucked up mess, don’t you?” Lynn suddenly spat, shaking her head, meanwhile her eyes were literally stinging with tears.

“What? No! I have no idea what’s going on!” he reassured her.

“God, I’m so stupid!” she sighed heavily.

“Why would you say that?” he asked.

“Because I genuinely thought you were being nice, not acting like this because you feel bad for me!” Lynn uttered, obviously frustrated, as she laced her fingers inside her hair.

“Lynn, I swear to God…” Brian started. “He sat down next to me. We barely spoke before Rebecca threw him out!”

“Yeah, but I bet you know everything now, don’t you?” Lynn shook her head. “Fuck! I thought you were actually different!”

“I don’t know what’s going on or what went on between Carter and you!” Brian insisted.

“Oh, so you just happen to know his name and his cousin?” Lynn cocked her eyebrows at him.

“Lynn, please…” Brian sighed. “He mentioned it and I remembered!”

“You know what? Forget this,” Lynn shook her head. “I don’t wanna see you right now.” she uttered.

“Lynn, seriously… You’re way out of line!” Brian insisted, his hand gripping hers.

“No, I’m not! I’m gonna get my stuff and leave, and you’re not coming after me!” Lynn insisted, tearing herself away from his grip and making her way towards the door.