Mister Nothing

Once in a while there were those days where I lost track of the time. Today was going to be one of them. I had no idea if it was Friday, Saturday, hell; it could have been Monday for all I knew. Last night was a night I'd never forget. Never before in my life had a man humiliated me like this, never before.

Austin thought it would be a nice idea to have a celebration party at our house for him getting a promotion and I was happy to celebrate with him, our friends and his co-workers. After everything we went through in order to get married, we deserved a little piece of happiness and we were finally getting that. Or so I thought!

I looked at my phone. It was Monday morning. Well, shit. I hoped he wasn’t downstairs. I rolled myself out of bed and placed my feet on the cold floor. I wore my slippers and mustered all my strength to go the toilet. I washed my face and my teeth before I could feel myself waking up. Now, I needed coffee.

I went into the kitchen, trying not to think how I could look at him without feeling disgust or any emotion at all. Trying not to think about it, I saw he wasn't there. At least he had made coffee. I grabbed a cup and went out to the balcony to have a smoke. I usually didn’t smoke but the situation was heavy so I needed that. It was like nicotine could do something, though it did absolutely nothing.

Where was he at? Did he go to work with his dear secretary or did he go bang her someplace else? We had so much to talk about... but to be honest; I wasn't ready for it yet. I didn't even know what else there was to be said. I should have left already, but leave and go where? This was my home. I tried pushing all the thoughts out of my head and calm myself. I didn't have a clear mind from all the alcohol I had last night and what went down.

I took a long drag, and then let it out as I peered over the railing to see the streets below. It was true that cities never sleep. There were always people out there, no matter what time it was. At any given time of day, they were doing something. I wondered if he was having fun somewhere out there and I was here looking like the mess I was. Was he walking the streets, riding the subway, or trying to get into her pants?

I couldn't calm myself. I was at a state where what I felt was pity. Not for him, for me. I could have done better. My family was right. I should have never believed him and gotten married to him in the first place. He always assured me that I meant everything to him. Why was he trying so hard to convince me? It wasn't like he needed me.

Worrying was for the weak, and I refused to give in. I tried forgetting again. He was nothing. He was worthless. The filter was burning by the time I decide to put out my cigarette. I went back inside and decided to get ready. For what, I didn't know, but ready nevertheless. The only thing I could do was to call my best friend over and tell her everything when I was ready. She was already very worried when she saw me in that condition and not even one word left my lips. Nothing other than ''I'm fine'' which I kept saying to everyone at the party till everything went black.

I gave a call to Ava and she came by later as I was making pancakes. The day was beautiful. We sat at the table outside the balcony and she turned on the radio to our favorite music station. The sun was bright, but it was still cool. The leaves had just begun to turn into wonderful reds, oranges, and browns. The colors were spectacular.

Ava and I had been friends for quite some time, around six years. We had met at a party thrown by our mutual friend, Manuel. It was instant platonic love when we met. It was much like we had already known each other since forever and we clicked. And to this day, we were still as close as two people could possibly be; probably closer than we should be. Close enough to think we were sharing the same blood. She could understand everything without me having to say anything.

After a while we decided to take a small walk, to breathe fresh air. She held my hand as we walked, showing me she was there for me at every step of the way. She tried her best to help me forget about life for a while and it was working till we reached my house again and I saw his car parking and coming home for unknown reasons.

I glared at him and even though we locked eyes, it wasn't that wonderful look that gives you butterflies. Right there we had a small battle, a battle of eyes contact. For the first time in my life, I couldn't handle it. I turned my eyes to look at Ava. She held my hand tighter.

‘’Are you ready to spill the beans, yet?’’ she asked.

Tears rolled down my face. ‘’He chea-‘’

A hand went over my mouth so I couldn't speak. ‘’I need my wife. Could you come by later, Ava?’’ I heard his hateful voice as I grabbed his hand and stepped forward, turning around to face him. My eyes had welled up and he had felt it in his hand before he actually saw me.

‘’Ava, go. We'll talk later.’’ I told my friend who was staring at me to make sure I could handle him. ‘’I'll be fine,’’ I assured her and she left.

Austin and I walked inside the house with me walking behind him. He went towards the living room as I closed the front door. Hell was going to break loose. Right then!