Loving You From The Past

This wasn't suppose to happen.
You're not suppose to bury your child.
You're not suppose to have to stand above your child.
You're not suppose to arrange the funeral for your child.

She was only four years old!
This was never suppose to happen.

Sam and Gerard are just looking at the cold soil.

Funny how it's just raining all day today.

Mother used to tell me when it rained,
God is mourning over a death of his child.

Bullshit.
There's no such thing as God.
He didn't even save his child.
He didn't even save my child.

For nine months,
she was underneath my heart.

What was this about?
I don't give a fuck anymore.
I don't give a fuck anymore.
I don't give a fucking fuck anymore.

I'm going to live my life.
The way I want it.

No Gerard.
No Mother.
No Father.
No Sam.
No fucking God.

To tell me how I should live it.

If I want to get drunk, I will.

And I really just want to get drunk.
And I really just want to drink myself to death.
And I really just want to drive my car out the hill.

FUCK YOU.
THIS IS ME YELLING OUT TO YOU.
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE.
YOU DESTROYED EVERYTHING I CARED ABOUT.
MY LOVE, MY LIFE, MY SUN, MY HAPPINESS, MY CHILD.
THIS IS MY HELL.