Wish You Were Here

Jules felt dreadful, she’d hardly slept and practically couldn’t wait until the morning. She felt like an intruder here in Tre’s house and wished she’d taken up Adrienne’s offer after all.

Glancing at the bedside clock it read 7.05am and she decided to take a long bath, make herself fairly presentable, collect up those clothes she wasn’t planning on wearing ever again and then get the hell out of here. She’d get a taxi to town and then have a look at buying herself a car. She wasn’t hard up; she had some savings and some money that Clive had put into an account for her. There was no way that fucker was getting that money back. She was going to spend it on a car and a deposit on somewhere to live and… buying some decent clothes.

The house was so quiet when she emerged from her room, freshly bathed, dressed in jeans and a white shirt with a touch of make up. Putting her hair into a ponytail she crept as quietly as she could down the carpeted stairs, noting that the living room door was now closed. Were they still in there? Had they finished the pack of condoms? Shaking her head free of unwanted thoughts she slipped on her sandals grabbed the bag with the never-to-be-worn again by her clothes and left Tre’s house.

The taxi pulled up directly outside the charity shop and when Jules handed the owner the designer fleeces and a few other items of clothing it was as though it was Christmas for the shop worker and Jules suddenly felt humbled by the fact that sometimes it doesn’t take much to please people and felt as though she’d done a good deed for the day a least.

She spent about an hour shopping then grabbed a coffee in Starbucks then as she turned after finishing paying for her latte she looked up to find Mike standing there.

“I thought it was you but I wasn’t a hundred percent sure, I didn’t want to make a fool of myself.” Mike said grinning widely as she looked up at him.

“What were you going to do, pinch my arse or something?” said Jules. “If it hadn’t of been me you would have made someone very happy,” Jules said smiling at him.

“Or may be someone would have shouted out assault so that’s why I kept my hands to myself, I’m just going to get myself a coffee and I’ll be with you.” He said quickly turning away and joining the queue of people.

“OK,” said Jules juggling her bags and her coffee and heading over to a window seat that had just become vacant.

Mike came over about five minutes later with the hugest carton of coffee she’d ever seen.

“You’re definitely an addict,” she said taking a sip from her skinny latte; “have you ever thought about having an intravenous drip full of coffee fitted?”

“Actually, that had crossed my mind you know.” Mike said taking a gulp from the steaming liquid. “Hey are you coming to the studios later?” He said placing the coffee down and slopping some over onto the table as he did so. They both grabbed a pile of napkins at the same time to mop it up, their hands touching slightly.

“I can’t wait to hear what you guys have been putting together, as Adrienne said it had better be worth it. Listen Mike I was sorry to hear about you relationship problems.” Jules said.

Mike glanced down at his coffee then picked up one of the plastic stirrers and started stirring up the coffee even though he didn’t take sugar.

“Yeah… well, some can hack it and some can’t. They know what its like before they get in with me and think they can handle it but in the end… they just don’t get it.” He said shrugging but still stirring away. He didn’t look up.

“So, anyone on the horizon at the moment?” asked Jules lifting up the latte to her lips.

“No, no one and I don’t suppose there will be for a while, I have to concentrate on this tour you know, its going to be a long one.” Said Mike, he too lifting his coffee and looking over the mug at Jules.

He looks sad thought Jules and she hated seeing any of her friends with that look.

“May be I’ll come out and see you, if it’s going to be a long one, you could do with some different company,” she said continuously taking sips from her coffee now that it had cooled.

“You’d better, it’s not been quite the same without you around.” He said. “We’re glad you’re back, Adrienne has missed her shopping buddy, I’ve missed my coffee buddy, Billie’s missed his hair stylist buddy and Tre’s missed… well Tre’s just missed having you close by, he’s not behaved himself too well.”

“What do you mean?” Jules said curious now.

“Oh… lets just say Tre’s dick’s been working overtime, he’s kind of been sleeping around a little since he split from Claudia, I don’t know why, may be he thinks he has to prove himself somehow, that he’s still got it or something,” said Mike.

“That doesn’t sound like Tre at all,” I said frowning.

“I think he needs a little stability, he’s gone by the wayside, may be it’ll change when he gets out on tour,” said Mike. “Yeah I think he just needs to get away. " Jules got the impression that Mike thought he’d said too much.

“Or he’ll sleep his way around the world,” Jules suddenly said.

“God I hope not, but its Tre’s body,” said Mike.

Anyway, Jules had had enough talking about Tre and his sleeping habits so she changed the subject as memories of last night and Tre on the sofa with Stephanie kept coming to mind.

“How’s Ana?” Asked Jules, “I’ve not heard from her for some time.”

“She’s good, she’s with someone, someone who works nine to five and it suits all of them. Estelle likes him and I’m glad, he seems a decent guy and treats them both well,” he said.

She did feel sad for him; it had been a terrible time after their marriage had broken up. It had been building up gradually over the years and Ana finally confessed that she couldn’t stand the times when he was away having to hold the fort at home and she missed working. She’d liked Ana and they’d had some fun times together all of them but she felt she’d taken Mike for granted when it suited her and when it didn’t well like Mike had said she couldn’t hack it.

“Its been ages since I’ve seen Estelle,” said Jules, “when is she next with you?” she asked draining her coffee and grabbing another napkin to wipe her lips.

“She’s with me tomorrow and if she knows that her Aunt Jules is back then she’ll insist on getting together with you,” he said.

“Good, she’s a great kid and I worry for her when she meets boyfriends because they’re not going to get within an inch of her without you looming over them,” she smiled. “Listen, I have a few things to do Mike, I want to check out some car showrooms and sort some bank details out,” she said standing up.

“Yeah, I’m heading off to the studios shortly and will probably be there until early evening,” he said as Jules bent and kissed his cheek.

“See you later then,” Jules said gathering up her bags.

“Yep, see you,” said Mike taking another glug from his coffee.

As Jules walked passed the window of the coffee shop on her way to the bank she glanced in at Mike and he was sitting there, a lonely figure stirring up his coffee and she remembered the moment they had shared a few years back.

That was something else that Tre knew nothing about she thought to herself, the only other thing that she’d kept from Tre, there was no way he would find out about that now, it was all dead and buried she thought as someone knocked into her as she hurried off to the bank.

Jules had done everything, she’d bought herself a small car that she was to collect tomorrow and her finances were sorted. She’d even put her name down for some agents to look for accommodation. As she left the bank she shuffled her bags around in her hands, balancing them out so that she could walk easier and headed off to the studios that were about 10 minutes walk away.

As she walked along there was a car parked up ahead. The passenger door was open and someone was leaning in and talking to the driver. She could hear the song coming out from the car as she got nearer, it was definitely Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here, and she hummed along to it and it took her back again, back to those days by the lake on their log, the first time she’d heard it….

It was the day after I’d seen him at the Hamilton House. I’d slipped out of the house after grabbing my bag I headed off down the track to my house. My heart was pounding and I was wide awake. I must have stood outside of my house for at least 10 or 15 minutes, not wanting to go in knowing that I wouldn’t be able to sleep after what I’d seen so I decided to head back up to the log, to sit out in the night air to think for a while but I ended up staying for well over an hour, my mind swimming with what I’d seen.

Tre having sex with a woman that was old enough to be his mother. Well, may be not old enough to be his mother but he was only 16 and she… she must be about 25 and they were doing it. I’d seen Tre doing it and my face grew flushed at the thought and the feelings it had brought out in me.

What did Mrs Hamilton see in him? He was good looking but what did someone like her want with him? Why wasn’t she seeing men her own age?

I was so confused, I couldn’t answer my own questions and didn’t know whether to mention it to Tre or not, mention that I’d seen him ‘doing it.’ I decided I wouldn’t say anything, nothing at all.

The next day was a Saturday. I knew he’d be there at this time of day llike always, just before he went off to Lawrence Livermore’s for practice he was there.

As soon as I saw him, lying there with the same jeans as the night before, the jeans that were around his ankles I couldn’t help but remember and my stomach tingled with a strange sensation.

“Hey,” he said turning to me, inhaling on his cigarette and sitting up.

“You OK?” He asked as I hesitated in stepping forward.

”Yeah, I’m fine, just… tired,” I said to him.

“You do too much babysitting, you need to get a life,” said Tre.

No actually I was kept awake with thoughts of you banging that woman, wondering what it would be like to ‘do it’ and what you saw in her.

“I saw you,” I said to him out of the blue.

“What? When? What are you on about,” said Tre as I sat next to him. I couldn’t look at him. His smoke was blowing my way and he took his pack of cigarettes out and offered me one.

“Last night, at Mrs Hamiltons.” I said looking out towards the lake, waiting for his answer. I could hear him strike up his match on the log and he lit my cigarette, no words were spoken. I inhaled deeply wishing that I hadn’t mentioned it at all, would things change between us now? May be they had already.

He didn’t speak so I looked across at him. He was biting his thumbnail, which he sometimes did when he was a little nervous.

“Tre? I saw you with that… with Mrs Hamilton, it was an accident I came back for my bag and the door was open and you and she…”

He interrupted me then.

“So what?” He said laying back and blowing smoke rings.

“Its… its disgusting,” I said not knowing what to say.

“Jules it’s not disgusting, god you’re so stuck up,” said Tre. Stuck up, he always called me that. I wasn’t.

“She’s much older than you.” I said.

“So what? She offered it on a plate, what do you think I’m going to turn that down?” he said.

“Was it… was it your first time?” I asked him, this was easier than I thought it would be. I suppose it was Tre and we’d talked about many things.

Then he sat up laughing.

“Of course it wasn’t, that was last year,” he said.

I was shocked.

“You were 15?” I said to him. “When?”

“With Patty Smith,” said Tre then I must have had a weird look on my face.

“You did ask me,” said Tre, “if you didn’t want to hear a certain answer then you shouldn’t have asked.”

I was kind of speechless and just let him just do the talking. I was remembering Patty Smith, she was a year older than us at school and had a bit of a reputation.

“She charged me,” said Tre, “yeah, one dollar for a hand job, two dollars for a blow job or ten dollars all the way. It was a good ten dollars well spent.” Then he smiled to himself, obviously remembering.

Then I started laughing and relaxed a little. It was almost comical, I couldn’t believe him but then I could, what 15-year-old boy wouldn’t react in that way. I turned and smiled at him.

“You want to try it some time,” said Tre cheekily.

“Yeah, when I’m ready,” I said to him. "Hey what’s that you’ve been listening to?” I asked him looking over at his discman.

He leant over to his discman and popped it open.

“Its Pink Floyds ‘Wish You Were Here,” he said and gave me one of the earplugs so that we could listen together.

It was awesome and we played it a few more times until I got used to the words then we sang along together which we did from then on, even years later, over and over when we were drunk or sober and even on the phone.

As the words ‘two lost souls living in a fish bowl’ floated around my head Tre’s words ‘you should try it some time’ echoed just that little bit louder than the song.