With Arrows, With Poise

Gee's POV

"Good show" I smiled and kissed Gerard on the cheek.
"Thanks" he smiled and slipped his hand around my waist as we slowly made our way back to the bus.
I looked out at the busy city and its flashing lights. I was so far away from home, but here is where I felt the most at home. Touring around to different cities. I loved the beauty of it. I leaned my head against Gerard's shoulder. His warm body kept me warm from the cool nights air.
"You know, Rards.." I began "I love touring. Especially with you."
He chuckled and kissed the top of my head. "I love touring with you too"
I smiled and rubbed my arms as we walked into the bus.

"Hey, Gee, Hannah Montana's on" Bob pointed to the T.V screen.
I smiled brightly. "I'll be right out, Bob"
"Gee" Gerard asked.
I turned around quickly. "Yeah, Rards"
"What are those marks on your arms?"
I shifted my eyes and looked down at them. I shaklily came up with an exuse. "Its nothing, Rards. I promise. Just allergies" I said before quickly walking into the bathroom for my high. I knocked on the door. "Sam" I wisperd.
"Yeah?" she asked.
"Let me in, now" I wisperd, fiddling with the door handle. It clicked open and I quickly ran inside.

"Shut the door, meathead" Sam insulted.
"Duhh" I smirked and shut the door. I looked down at Sam's needle filled with the amazing high. I cleared my throat and looked at my reflection in the mirror as I put some in the spoon to be melted. "I look so gross"
"Yeah, same" Sam mumbled as she began to inject herself.
I ran my hand through my hair before bringing the lighter up to the bottem of the spoon. I looked in the mirror one last time. I seen the reflection of Gerard standing in the dark hallway. I screamed and dropped the spoon and lighter into the sink. The brown liquid flew over the mirror and the counter.
Gerard pushed the bathroom door open and stepped in side. He reached for my bag of heroin and held it infront of my face. He was shaking from anger and dissapointment. "Heroine?!". His low scream echoed throughout the bus. "Are you shooting, or sniffing again?" he glanced at Sam who was hold the needle in one hand and just coming back to life. "And you got Sam in this too?"
"I..I.." I stammerd.
"I fucking trusted you!" he screamed louder. His veins were popping out of his forehead and neck. "And you betray me like this? Fuck!" He clenched the bag in his hand, then threw it at the wall outside the bathroom. The impact was so powerful that the white powder sprinkled everywhere. "I told you to fucking talk to me!"
"I..I..I..I was too sc. scared"
He clenched his teeth together. "Jesus!" he yelled once again. "Where the fuck did you get it from?"
"I..N.. Uh.."
"Don't fuck with me, Gee!" he pointed his index finger in my face. Before I could answer, he slammed his fist onto the counter. "Bert!" he yelled, and turned on his heel out the door.
"NO" I screamed and ran after Gerard. "Gerard, no!" I screamed again as he called him up on his cell phone. He ignored my screams, and began throwing threats at Bert.
"Were you supplying them?" he screamed into the phone. "Don't fuck with me Bert. I'm not in the mood" I couldn't hear Bert's responces very well. "Don't fucking talk to her again, okay. Stay the fuck away fr... Okay." he nodded. Anger flashed in his hazle eyes. "Fine. You wanna start shit, I'll end it" he threated before slamming the phone down. "He's fucking asking for it" Gerard shook his head angrily and light up a smoke. "And you" he pointed at me "Stay the fuck away from him, okay? I don't need you fucking lying to me all the god damn time. I'm here to help you, you know? I understand you were scared. Just write me a note or something."
"Its not that easy!" I screamed and ran back into the bathroom. I slammed the door shut and locked it this time. I braced my hands against the sink counter and took in shaky inhales and exhales. Tears slid down my guilty face. I sobbed and placed my forehead on my folded arms on the counter.
"I fucked up big time" I sobbed to myself. I cried harder and started to get a headache from it. I lifted my head up and stood up to see my crying reflection in the mirror. I sniffled back and wiped a few tears from my face before more collected around my eyes. "I'm so sorry, dad. I dissapointed you" I cried harder. I looked into the mirror once again and thought I seen his peaceful face.
"Motherhood will stop you" I heard him say before vanishing.
"I..I... Dad?" I asked "What?" I sobbed no one inparticular anymore. "Motherhood?" I sobbed to myself.
The small room was hot from my tears. All my energy was used up from crying. My head hurt. I was shaking from craving. And I was confused. I took more deep breaths and grew aggrivated with myself and my "fathers" 4 words. Tears were still spilling down my face. Outside, I heard Gerard ranting to the guys. His angry words were echoing through my mind that was filled with a million thoughts.
"I can't take this shit"
"What the hell was she thinking
"Why didn't she tell me?"
"Why would she do that behind my back?"
"I don't know if I can trust her now"
"Maybe we should send them home?"
"How could she hurt me like this?"
Finaly, I couldn't take it.
"AAAAAAHHHH" I screamed. With all the engergy I had left, I threw my fist at the bus mirror. Glass shattered. I felt it scraping against my bare arms, my face, and my hands as I felt myself collapse on the floor.

Sam's POV

"Gerard, calm down" Frank said
"How can I?" he said, his voice loud and angry. He clenched his fists tight. "She lied to me"
"But she was scared" Bob said standing up for his buddy. "Look, I know what she did wasn't a smart move, but you don't have room to talk, Gerard. When you were an addict, did you tell your mom even though she told you to tell her that shit?"
"This isn't about me, Bob" Gerard yelled and quickly stood up. "Its about her and Sam. and stop defending her" he growled.
"I can defend who I want, Gerard" Bob argued back "You don't tell me what to do okay? Why don't you stop bitching and go help her?"
"Help her?" he asked. His arms flew into the air. "I think she's beyond my fucking help"
"Rehab?" Mikey piped in.
I gulped at that word. I've never been in rehab before. I felt Gerard's eyes piercings holes in me as he looked at me.
"Now its my turn to be pissed at you" he spat. "You didn't fucking stop her. You just went along. What that?" he screamed.
"Gerard!" Frank screamed at the top of his lungs. He jumped quickly off the coach and stood infront of me. "I'll deal with Sam. You deal with Gee, okay?" he pointed angrily at his band mate.
"Fine" he grumbled and threw his water bottle at the wall. "Just fucking fine!"
"Gerard, stop acting like a god damn kid" Mikey rolled his eyes.
Gerard pulled the finger before storming off into the back.
I was too scared to breathe at that moment. What Gerard said was taking a big affect on me. I knew he didn't really mean it... or did he? I gulped and looked around the bus. Everything around me went silent for a while. My guess was everyone was trying to vent off their own anger against this. Gerard did have a point though. I didn't stop her. I just followed her. I was as bad as he was at Warped Tour. And my daughter? What the fuck was I doing with my life. I bit my lip and tears were forming around my eyes.
"Sam, what's wrong?" Mikey asked. He gently rubbed my back. All the guys looks changed from annoyed to sympathetic for the little heroin addict.
I shook my head and stood up. "Don't feel bad for me guys, okay? I did this to myself. Gerard was right.. I didn't stop Gee. I didn't stop myself either. I thought I could help her if she got addicted again, but I was wrong. I'm an addict myself" I cried harder and ran back to Frank's bunk. I flopped down and burried my head in the pillow.
I didn't deserve Frank. I didn't even deserve anyone after what I've done. What our addictions have caused to this band.
"Sam" I heard Frank's voice from the floor below.
I sighed and turned my head to face the dark wall. "What, Frank?"
"Can we talk?" he asked.
I sighed again and decided to sit up. "Okay"
"Thanks" he said before climbing up to the top bunk. He sat at the end, while I sat at the front. I could only see the outline of him, but it was probably better that way. "Look" he began "I knew you and Gee were up to something. Mikey told me."
I swollowed hard and rememberd that moment. "Oh.."
"And, I knew you and Gee went to that party"
"Damn. I knew we'd be busted" I mumbled.
Frank chuckled merley. "But, you know you need help right?"
"I know, Frank. I've realized that now. After Taste Of Chaos I'm going to go into rehab, okay?"
"You promise me?" he asked, sounding unsure. "Because you know I wont be there to make you go.."
"I know. I will. I promise." I said in the most assuring tone possible. "I'm just sorry we made Gerard angry."
"Don't worry about that, okay" I felt him tap my thigh. "Just worry about getting better"
A mere smile escaped through my lips. "Okay, Frank. I will"
"Good" he said before pulling me into a hug.
I hugged him back and felt an ounce of hope. Hope that I'd be better. Inspiration to go to rehab. "Thank you, Frank"
"For..?"
"For helping me realize I need to get help. Thanks"
"Don't worry about it" he wisperd and kissed my forehead. "You should go check on Gee. She's been in that bathroom for quite some time"
"Oh,right" I nodded as the light went off in my head. "Gave her space, y'know?"
"I know" Frank said before walking off to the front of the bus.

"Gee" I tapped on the bathroom door. "Are you okay?". No answer. I fiddled with the doorknob, but it was locked. "Gee" I screamed and began pushing myself against the door. I praied to god she didn't try to over dose. I smashed on the door but it didn't open. "BOB" I yelled. He could get the damn door open.
"Yo" he called out. I looked over and see his shadow in the arch way.
"Get this damn door open. Its locked. Gee's in there and she wont asnwer"
"Fuck" Bob wisperd and ran back to the bathroom. He pulled out, then in with all this strength, and the door swun open.
I looked in horror at the bits and pieces of bloody glass were shatterd around my unconseous friend. "Gee?" I wisperd and shook her gently. There was no vomit on the floor, so she couldn't have over dosed.
"She's still alive. Just knocked out" Bob said with a sound of worry.
"Do we need to take her to the hospital? I mean, look at all this glass"
Bob looked around the small bathroom, then examined the cuts on her arms, face and forehead. "Nope. The peices aren't small enough to fit into her skin. All we need is some alcohol to clean it with, a broom to sweep, a mop to mop, and bed, and a cold face cloth for her forehead."
I looked up at Bob. "You know your shit"
"Yeah" he blushed "Gotta love First Aid camp"
My eyebrow rose. "You went to.."
He held his hand up and laughed. "Don't ask. Parents idea"
"Well, you just never know... Nurse Bob" I snorted.
"Shut up and get the alcohol out of the cuppoard" he smirked and picked Gee up. Her body limp over his arms.

"Here" I said. I handed Bob the alochol and a cloth to use.
"Thanks" he said gently applying it to her wounds. She flinched a bit.
"She's awake?" I asked
"Almost" Bob smiled. "She's just really tired"
"And you know this how...?" I asked suspiciously.
He stopped applying the alcohol and twisted the cap back on. "Wouldn't you be tired if you didn't get your high, and had your boyfriend PMSing on you?"
I thought about it and nodded. "You know, you're right"
"As always" he smirked and walked back into the bathroom.
I reached down and grabbed Gee's hand. "It'll be okay, Gee" I wisperd.

Jilly's POV

"Jilly" Aaron screamed, jumping on our hotel bed.
I groaned and stirred. "What?"
"You get your surprise today!" he yelled and jumped harder on the bed.
"Okay" I yawned and grabbed his ankle so he'd stop jumping, but he didn't. I bounced with him. "Ahhh!" I exclaimed. "Atleast I'm awake now"
"Exacly" he clapped and hopped off the bed. "How long does it take you to do your woman ritual?"
I laughed and pulled the covers off me. "It depends. It could be fast depending on what the surprise is"
"Well, its a good one" he smiled and gave me a nose kiss.
"Okay. I'll trust you" I winked and walked into the bathroom to put on my face.

"Alright" I yawned and walked over to my suite case. "Time to get dressed"
"Jesus, took you long enough" he mumbled, sitting up.
I shrugged "That's what you get for waking me up early"
"But we have to be their early!! We have to..well, we just have to" he said.
I laughed and slipped on my skinnyjeans and tanktop. "Okay, okay."
"Are you ready?!" he asked quickly jumping off the bed.
"I'm ready" I nodded and grabbed my camera before we headed out for what ever Aaron had in mind.

The elevator dingged as we enterd the lobby. Aaron jolted out and ran for the lobby doors. "Its like living with a kid" I mumbled and follwed him at my 'snails' pace.
"Jesuuuss hurryy" he yelled. It was almost impossible to hear him over the beeing car horns, and millions of people talking on their cell phones or to one another.
"I'm here, I'm here"I stopped and stretched. "Why'd we stop here anyways?"
"TAXII" Aaron yelled, and flagged one down. It pulled up to the curb. Aaron poked his head in the drivers side window and spoke something in French. The cab driver nodded and Aaron paied him the money.
"I didn't know you could speak French" I said as the cab pulled off.
"I can't. I just learned how to say those five words"
I laughed. "Only you, Aaron. Only you"

An hour or so of driving later, we pulled up to an amusement park. My eyes were glued to the cabb window as I looked out at it. Quickly, I got out of the cab to make sure I wasn't dreaming.
I looked up at the sign and rubbed my eyes. "Six Flags?!" I screamed
"Six Flags!!" Aaron screamed beside me. He jumped up and down and ran towards the line. "This is why I wanted to be here early"
I gasped and pulled Aaron into a kiss "I love you"
"I love you too" he smirked and slipped his shades on. "Its gonna be a hott one today"
"Definitely" I nodded and was thankful for my tanktop and bathing suit underneath.

I looked around the massive park and was in complete awe. I couldn't believe I was actually here. I heard screams occur from the fast rides , and splashing from the water slides. All around people were talking and having a good time. I loved it.
"Where to first?" he asked.
"The fast rides" I smiled brightly and ran in the directions of the screaming.
"Of course!" he yelled behind me, running to catch up.
"You don't mind fast rides, do you?" I asked in a taunting voice. He was coming on with me wether he wanted to or not.
"Nope. Don't mind at all" he smirked and clapped his hands together evily. "I can't wait"
"Me either" I clapped.. Heads turned in the line, but I just smiled and ignored them.
When it was my turn I quickly stepped up the wooden stairs to the roller coaster. I ran to the middle seat and sat down proudly.
"I love these things" Aaron said as the others quickly boarded.
"Me too, me too" I laughed.
I felt the coaster jolt forward, and the belts lock as we began our ride in the fast lane. The wind zoomed through my hair. My face was almost pulled back from all the wind.
"WOOO" I screamed as we went around a loop.
"Hell yeah!" Aaron screamed around another loop.

"Fuck that was awesome" Aaron laughed as we walked off.
"I know!" I clapped and looked around at the more dangerously scary rides.
"This one!" Aaron pointed. The ride was massive. It spun around, and rose up high in the hair.
"Yes!" I screamed and ran up to the short line.
I screamed as we rose sky high and spun around furiously. My stomach flipped as I let out a "WOOOOO" and gripped on to the bars.
"THIS IS SO AWESOME" Aaron screamed as the ride flew down, and then up again spinning us around in circles.

Hours passed. I was getting tired, but having so much fun
"I really enjoyed myself today. Thank you so much" I smiled.
"No prob , babe" Aaron smirked and kissed me. "Want to go get some food, and head back on the rides?"
"Yeah, sure" I nodded. I was starving.
The delicous smells filled my nose as we walked into the resturaunt. I didn't even know what I was hungry for everything smelt so good.
"Whatcha want?" Aaron asked as we sat down and picked up the menue.
"I'm not sure" I ponderd, looking at the menue. Everything looked good. I was hard to decide. "Uhm... I'll have a chicken ceaser"
"Really?" Aaron asked.
"Yes" I stuck my tongue out.
"Okay" he chuckled. "And mozza sticks?"
"YES" I nodded agreeingly.
"Great" he said as he placed the menue on the table.
The waiter came over and took our order.
"Thank you for an amazing day" I smiled a smile that's been plasterd on my face all day."
"Anything for you"