Alice in Wonderland

I shot up in bed with a yelp, startled by the sound of my phone ringing in my ear. I grumbled and rubbed my eyes, hitting the talk button on my red Blackberry and pressing it to my ear.

“Hello?” I mumbled into the receiver.

“Good morning sunshine! The world says ‘hello!’” a voice shouted into my ear.

I grumbled curse words and pulled the phone away from my ear. After the ringing had stopped I replaced to phone to my ear. “Tell the world to go fuck itself.” I stated agitated, getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom.

“That’s no way to the man who you fell asleep talking too last night.” I could practically here his pout.

I stopped mid step in my hallway. I frowned, “I did? Again? I’m sorry Cuddles.”

“It’s alright, love. You’re a busy girl. I still love you!” he giggled.

Cuddles is my personal assistant. And my best friend. I’ve known Cuddles, aka James Clark, since I moved to LA 2 months ago from North Carolina, 3 years after I graduated high school as a junior . He keeps my life in check. Without him I wouldn’t know when to breath.

My life is hectic to say the least. My job out here in LA is a Dating Coach. A dating coach is exactly as it sounds. I help you learn how to date properly, what are the wrong and right places to find a suitable mate, and how to be confidant in yourself.

I started out doing small jobs. No one who was rich or famous. But as word of my success grew throughout LA, I started getting richer and richer clients. You know Ronnie Radke? He wasn’t always his cocky self. He used to be so shy he looked like he was about to vomit when he talked to girls. That is, until I came along. I didn’t teach him how to be cocky though, that is all his doing.

“So what’s on the agenda for me today, Cuddles?” I asked as I walked into my huge bathroom. Hey, my job pays more then well. I get paid the equivalent a top model gets paid. Cool, I know.

“Um….lets see. You have a noon interview with seventeen magazine, a 2 o’clock lunch with Brad, Angelina, and the new twins. As a thank you for hooking them up a shiz. At three thirty you have a photo shoot for the Rolling Stone cover you will be on. And at Five you have an appointment with Fall Out Boy. Supposedly the bassist, guitarist, and drummer think that their lead singer needs help being less shy, so he can get laid I guess. I’ve seen a picture of him, he’s cute. I don’t know why he wouldn’t be able to get laid.” Cuddles laughed.

I stripped my clothes. “Well, you never know Cuddles. Maybe he needs more then one night stands with groupies. Maybe he’s one of those guys that actually want true love.” I murmured, turning the hot water knob for the shower.

He sighed. “If he is one of those guys, it sucks that he’s straight.”

I laughed, said a quick goodbye, and got into the shower.

I need to be ready for my fun filled day of making people confidant.

~~~~~Pete’s POV~~~~~~

“YOU DID WHAT?!” Patrick screamed, red as a tomato.

Yeah, he’s not happy.
I don’t know why he isn’t! he should be glad that we took it upon ourselves to get him professional help for his dating issues! Not like he was gonna do it.

“Patrick, chill man. We did this for you. Don’t act like we did it just to piss you off. We want you to be happy Trick. And sleeping with random groupies who only like ‘cus your Patrick frucking Stump, it's less than you deserve.” Andy stated softly.

Patrick looked down at the grey carpeting of the tour bus. Me, Joe, and Andy were all sitting on the medium sized couch in the so called living room. While Patrick was sitting on the kitchen counter. He looked back up at us. “How do you know I deserve better? What if my life is destined to be this way?”

I stood up. “Damn it Patrick! We know you deserve better because we know you! If anyone walking this earth deserves true love and happiness its you! Your kind to everyone, even when they don’t deserve it!” I walked up to him and grabbed his shoulders, shaking him a little. “Get this through your thick skull, dude! You. Kick. Ass. End of story. Any chick with a brain could see that. And this dating coach is going to help you find the right girl.” I let his shocked self go and stepped away. “Your going. Deal with it.” I walked back to the bunks and laid down in mine, throwing my ipod ear buds in and blasting The Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack. This was going to be a long day.