Wreckage From the Past Haunts Me; Shakes Me to the Bone

I heard my phone vibrate on my nightstand making me instantly grab it so it didn't wake up anyone else. It was currently 6:00 am. I know it's early, but I wanted to go get Vicki some clothes to wear today and go get things for breakfast. I wanted to treat Jimmy to breakfast in bed for taking care of Aidyn so much and he had a hard night last night. I got out of bed and quietly made my way into my bathroom to do my business before walking back out and looking at the bed. Jimmy was laying with Vicki in his arms. It looked like she had a nightmare or something. Jimmy was sleeping peacefully though. I quietly grabbed a pair of pants out of my dresser and slipped them on before grabbing my shoes and slipping them on as well. I was trying to be extremely quite because Jimmy's a light sleeper. I blame it on all of those year of sleeping in odd places and having to watch out for cops.

I walked out of my room and into Aidyn's to make sure that he was still asleep before walking down stairs. When I got down stairs I saw Matt in pair of sweats and his running shoes. I quickly stopped dead in my tracks knowing he would question me for being up this early. Man why do I feel like I'm in high school again. I took a few steps back and hid behind the wall until I heard the door open. Man Am i glad he goes out for morning runs. I walked out to the garage and into my SUV. I shut the door only to have a hand placed over my mouth. I screamed and opened my eyes to see Matt smiling behind me showing those wonderful dimples. Note the sarcasm.

"So you really think I wasn't going to know you were sneaking out. I've known every time." Matt said chuckling.

"Even the time I snuck out and partied with Jimmy?! And partied I mean went back to his house and well..You can figure out the rest for your self." I asked smiling. Matt's eyes got extremely dark making me laugh harder.

"Calm down. I've never done anything with him."

"Where are you going anyways?" He asked finally.

"I'm going to get stuff for breakfast and going to get Vicki some clothes to wear today." I said as I sat back in my seat and sighed. Matt's arms wrapped themselves around me as he leaned forward so he could rest his head on the shoulder of the seat.

"That's really cool of you." He whispered.

"I want to make Jimmy breakfast in bed since he took care of Aidyn all of that time." He nodded and got out of the car.

"Wait right here. I'm coming with you." I sighed a nodded and waited for about 10 minutes before he showed up.

"Ready?" I asked once he got into the car.

"Yeah. So where to first?"

"I was thinking we should just head over to The Gap. See what they have there before heading over to Hot Topic." I heard Matt groan at Hot Topic and I couldn't help, but laugh, "Relax. I'm getting one shirt for her and maybe a pair of pants. We're going shopping later."

We pulled up in front of Gap and we both got out and walked into the store and immediately over to the baby clothes. I searched for a little over twenty minutes before I found the perfect pair of dark grey toddler size skinny jeans. She would look so cute in them. We quickly ran over to Hot Topic and found the perfect shirt. When we were in front of the Grocrey store my bother started to ask questions. I knew he had an alternative reasoning for wanting to go with me.

"So...how do you feel about Jimmy?" He asked looking at me as we walked into the store.

"I really like him. I'll be honest."

"What do you like about him?"

"Everything. I love his eyes. The fact that he's extremely loyal. He cares about the ones he loves. He's out of his mind. He's just over all...one of the most perfect guys that I have ever seen. He's my version of Edward Cullen." I said laughing. Matt laughed too. He might not have read the books, but I told him every little detail I read. How can you not! Stephenie Meyer is one of the best writers out there. A/n: besides my twinie Tara

"What about his past? The fact that he has a daughter that he never told you about?"

"I love his past. It made him how he is now. And as for his daughter...Matt I just went out and bought his daughter an outfit and I'm taking her shopping today. It was his choice not to tell me. I respect that. Plus he was doing what he thought was right." Matt nodded his head and hugged me before kissing my forehead.

___________Breakfast!____________

I was dicing the green peppers while the ham was cooking in the pan next to me. I threw them into a bowl on the counter that contained different types of vegetables and started making has browns. I put the shredded potato in the pan and started whisking the eggs before putting some into another pan and taking the ham off to cut it into small slices before putting them into the bowl with the green pepper. I sighed and chuckled slightly before grabbing the cheese and putting some on top of the egg and a handful of the contents in the bowl and put it on top of the egg and flipped one side over. I heard little footsteps coming down the hall before I saw that already familiar reddish hair peaking out from behind the wall.

"Hi Victoria." I said smiling. I walked back over to the stove and put the omelet onto a plate and putting some hash browns on the plate next to it before smiling down to Vicki and picked her up with one hand making her giggle before I placed her on the couch in the living room and turned the TV onto Dora. She looked at me with a look I instantly knew. It was the same as Jimmy 'What the hell are you thinking?' look. I laughed before changing the channel. I thought about how Jimmy acted at this age. From what my parents told me when they watched him, he always watched music videos and Barney. I put on Fuse before hearing her squeal happily. I smiled before walking back into the kitchen and grabbing the other omelet and hash browns and placing them both on plate. I put the plate on a tray and grabbed a cup of coffee and a glass of orange juice and put them there as well next to a copy of Metal Hammer.

"Hey don't we get any food?" Zacky asked walking down stairs and nearly making me fall down them as I held the tray.

"Yeah just let me give Jimmy this." I said as I contuined my journey. I got to my room and opened the door before walking in and seeing Jimmy laying on his side away from the open blinds. I smiled and placed the tray on the nightstand before shutting the curtain and walking back over to the bed. I sat on the edge and gently shook him.

"Jimmy...Jimmy Hun wake up." I said. He rolled on his back before stretching and opening his eyes and looking up at me.

"I made you breakfast." I said as I looked over at the table that still had held his hot food. He sat up and looked over at the food and back to me.

"You didn't have to." He said as he smiled.

"Yeah I did. I didn't get to thank you enough for taking care of Aidyn and you had a rough night. Now If you excuse me I need to go fix everyone else breakfast and get Vicki ready for the day." I said as I got up.

"Thank you Trista. For everything." He said with his head down. I smiled and picked up his chin before leaning down and kissing him lightly on the lips. I felt him smile into it and put his hand on the back of my neck before pulling me back down onto his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he ran his hands under my shirt to res ton my hips. He ran his tongue along my bottom and opened my mouth slightly. We both battled for dominance, but I gave up and let him explore the once familiar territory. We continued to kiss for a few minutes before I pulled away.

"Sorry, but I had to." He said as he regained his breath. I nodded and smiled knowing exactly what he meant. I got up and walked out of the room telling him I was going to go get everyone's breakfast done and get Vicki ready.

"Oh Jimmy I have one thing to ask. What's Vicki's full name?"

"Victoria Lee Sullivan...Why?" He asked as he drank his coffee.

"She's just like you so I have a feeling I'll be using it in the future." I said as I shut the door. I heard his heart filled laugh before I walked the rest of the way back down stairs and into the kitchen to see that everyone was already eating. They all looked up at me before looking back down at their food. I noticed that Brittney was holding Aidyn and feeding him a bottle while she ate. I walked over to take him, but she just waved me off and smiled.

"I finished breakfast since you were too busy making out with Jimmy." Matt said with a mouth full of food. He was glaring at me. I just put my head down and walked out. I didn't feel bad before, but now I do. I know it's just breakfast, but still. I walked out into the living room to see Vicki standing on the table doing air guitar. It was the cutest thing I had ever seen.

"Vicki...come on let's get you ready." I said quietly. She smiled and nodded before grabbing my hand and pulled me upstairs. I walked into my room and smiled over at Jimmy who was now reading his magazine and drinking his orange juice. He sent me a look asking what was wrong, but I shook my head. I walked into the bathroom and started the bath. I got it where I wanted it before I told her to get in. Once she was in she started playing with the bubbles. I smiled and started to wash her hair and body before wrapping her up in my big fluffy purple towel. I walked out into my room to see Matt standing there.

"Well I'll just head out so you two can make out again." He said as he walked out. I stood there and looked down before setting Vicki down next to the bag and walking back into the bathroom. I sat down on the floor with my back against the wall. I told him earlier that I like Jimmy. Why is he making such a big deal?

"Hey are you ok?" Jimmy asked as he sat down next to me. I didn't even realize he walked in. His hair was sticking up. He didn't have a shirt on and his flannel bottoms hung loosely around his waist showing his V.

"Yeah. I'm fine."

"Tris. I've been your best friend for over 20 years. I know when something is wrong." I wiped away the tears that were threatening to fall before I told him.

"I feel like I...I let him down."

"So you regret it?" He asked sounding hurt.

"No! No! No! See that's the thing. If I regret it then i would have told him it was a mistake. I feel bad because I don't regret it."

"So by not regretting it you feel like your letting him down?" He asked with his eye brow raised.

"You now that sounds so much worse then I thought it would." I said laughing slightly. He sighed and got up before walking over to the shower and starting it.

"Take a shower. It'll calm you down. I'm going to talk to him."

"Jimmy don't. It's not worth it." He just shook his head and pointed to the shower. I nodded and got up and got undressed before stepping into the shower feeling the warm water run down my back and face. I sat there for a few moments before washing up. Once i was done I grabbed my towel before wrapping it around me and walking out into my room. I looked over at Vicki who was coloring on a piece of paper.

"Hey want to help me pick out my clothes?" I asked her. Her face lit up making me laugh. I opened my closet and she went to town. She pointed up at my white vest and my black pinstripe boots. I chuckled slightly before grabbing them out and setting them on my bed. I grabbed out a pair of dark blue skinny jeans and a black tank top. I pulled on my underwear and the clothes I had so far, including my boots, before I walked into my bathroom and straightened my hair and put on my make up. I looked at myself in the mirror to see that something was missing. I walked out and sat on my bed to see my brother sitting there with his head in his hands. I just quietly walked by him. I didn't know what he was going to do. As I was walking by his hand went out and pulled me down on his lap. I jumped slightly. It had scared me. I got a flash back of Brandon for a second before I remember that it was just my brother.

"I'm sorry." He said with his head buried in my neck. I nodded and hugged his head.

"I'm sorry too. I shouldn't be kissing your best friend." I said with my head down on top of his.

"No. I trust Jimmy if anyone I'd be glad if you were with him. It makes my job easier if he breaks your heart." I looked at him funny before seeing those dimples, "I already know where to find him."

"Get out I need to get ready!" I said laughing at my brothers explanation. Jimmy walked in a minute later with Vicki in his arms. I noticed that she was now adorning a huge smile and a few cookie crumbs.

"You used her to get to Matt didn't you." I asked.

"No I used her as a shield." he smiled. He went into my closet and pulled out a fedora that Brian got me last year and a purple belt before handing them to me. I put them on before picking up Vicki and walking into the bathroom and wiped her face.

"Ready to go shopping?" Tegan asked as she stepped inside my room. She was dressed in a pair of red zebra hot shorts that had a pair of black leggings under and a cut up black shirt that had a red shirt with a pair of black flip flops on. Her hair was down straight and she had her blue eyes out lined with eyeliner making them pop.

"Yeah let's go!" I said as I grabbed my wallet and put it in my back pocket. I grabbed my keys and Vicki before walking out to my car.

"Do we have a car seat for her?" Tegan asked. I shook my head before thinking.

"Do you mind holding her in the back until get to Babies R Us or something?"

"Why didn't you get it before?"

"Would you kill me if I said I wanted her to pick it out?" I asked smiling sweetly.

"Girls! There's a car seat in the backseat of my car." Jimmy said as he ran out. He grabbed it out of the car and put it in my car. Clearly it was out of date. It was destroyed. The pieces were coming off and it was worn out.

"I'm still getting her one." I said as I set her in it and buckled her. Jimmy reached in after and gave her a kiss and tickled her. I smiled and got into the drivers side as Tegan got into the passengers.

"Be good for daddy alright. I don't want Trista to have to tell me that you weren't be good ok?" She smiled and nodded her head, "I'll have a surprise ready when you get home alright?"

"Yay!" She said as she jumped up and down in her car seat. He came over to my side of the car and knocked on the window. I rolled down my window and smiled at him.

"Be careful. Don't spend too much money and please tell me if she does anything wrong."

"I will. I'll spend as much on her as I can and she's going to be getting away with quite a bit so don't hold your breath." I said rolling my eyes. He smirked and grabbed my face before kissing me lightly.

"Just be careful." I nodded and started the car before backing out of the driveway. I drove down to Babies R Us with Pinkly Smooth playing. Me and Tegan were laughing as we heard Vicki trying to sing along with Jimmy's voice. I pulled into a parking spot in front of the store. I got Vicki out of the car and walked into the store. I think that was one of the worst mistakes. As soon as I was out of the car cameras were flashing and Vicki started to get scared. I grabbed a blanket out of the back and covered her head with it before whispering that it was ok in her ear. Me and Tegan rushed to get inside with the help of some employees.

A girl not even 17, who was pregnant, walked up to me and hugged me and Tegan, "I'm glad your ok. Me and my friends are huge fans. I feel bad for asking, but can i get your autograph? Oh by the way I'm Marie."

"Sure thing." I said as I switched Vicki to my other arm and signed the piece of paper she held out. She handed it to Tegan where she did the same. My handwrite was very elegant. At least when I was writing my stage name. Other then that it was a lot like a guys.

"I have a question." She said as she smiled.

"We may have your answer." Tegan said laughing.

"Are you two twins?" Me and Tegan laughed and nodded. We never told fans we were twins. I wanted to see how long it would take them.

"Thank you!" She said as she ran out. Me and Tegan both smiled before walking in. After chasing Vicki all of the store and buying lots of stuff we finally had a ll of the furniture and even some clothes for her.

"Ready to go to the mall?" I asked as I watched Vicki cover her head in her Cherry Blossom blanket we just bought her. I had found out that me and her had a lot in common for her only being two. One thing we both love Asian themes, which gave me a pretty good idea for her bedroom. I pulled her into my arms and hid her face again before I set her in the car and belted her.

"Are you ok?" I asked. I know that she's not used to things like this. Hell if it isn't for Brandon this wouldn't have happened! The media left us alone. i wonder when this is going to die down. She nodded.

"Is she ok?" Tegan asked as I sat in the drivers seat with my head against the wheel.

"She said yeah, but she's freaked. Maybe we should just go home." I said as I looked at my twin.

"No. We'll take her to build a bear." She said smiling.

"You just want to go to build a bear don't you?" I asked smiling over a her as she nodded her head. We pulled into the malled and ran in avoiding all of the cameras.

"To build a bear!" Tegan said as she skipped over. I looked at Vicki who was laughing before walking over. Once inside Vicki pointed over to the Westie teddy bear. I smiled and grabbed it for her before grabbing a penguin for myself. After filling them up we got the outfits. Hers was a rocker outfit and a pair of little drum sticks and mine was an orange kimono and a pair of blue shorts. I wonder if anyone will figure it out. Tegan's was a monkey that was dressed din a sweater vest and a pair of tan pants.

We all laughed at each other before paying. Vicki was happily skipping next to me as she held onto her Westie. I walked into Punk baby and started shopping. Tegan's eyes landed on a black shirt that had a bas guitar on it and smiled. I laughed as Vicki jumped up a down and reached for it. After many rock shirts including, I want to Rock like my dad; a Into Mischief; a Royal Pain shirt; a few skirts that she liked and many pants later. I had a bill of $500 and five bags. I noticed it was around lunch time.

"Hey lets go get some food." I said as Tegan pulled Vicki into her arms. Vicki hid her face in her neck and was slowly falling asleep. I smiled and walked over to the food court.

"What do you want to eat love?" I heard Tegan ask her.

"Pizza!" She yelled. We nodded and laughed and walked over to the little pizza place. Me and Tegan order ours and two large cokes before ordering Vicki a slices of cheese and a root beer. We sat down and drank our drinks as we waited.

"So what was with Matt this morning?" Tegan asked.

"He kind of caught me and Jimmy making out this morning." I said with my head down.

"Why was he so mad about it then?"

"I don't know. I told him this morning that I like Jimmy. I just don't know!" I said looking up as our food came. Suddenly my appetite wasn't so big. Vicki wen tot town on her food. Not even ten minutes later it was gone. Me and Tegan laughed at her slightly. She was laughing and smiling before she started to cry. I was immediately pulling her into a tight grasp.

"What is it baby?" I asked. Tegan was looking around trying to see anything that would have made her cry, but we saw nothing. Just normal people. She gripped my right arm tighter and hid herself. Me and Tegan looked at each other before nodding. We grabbed all of our stuff and left the food court. I ran into someone and my eyes widened.

"Well hello Tegan." He said looking at Tegan. I thought she was going to scream. It was Jeff Todd. Her ex-boyfriend, and Brandon's best friend. An ex-boyfriend that was exactly like Brandon. Tegan grabbed my hand and hid herself behind me as we stood in front of him.

"Oh you have Victoria. Which means one thing. Elizabeth gave her up. Back to Jimmy. Brandon will defiantly be pleased to hear this. Oh since I ran into you. He's getting out soon. Within the next three months." He said as he laughed and walked away. I looked at Tegan and immediately took off out of the store.

"We need to get home right now." Tegan said as we got into the car. I could see the tear in her eyes and I'm sure she could see the ones in mine. I shakily got Vicki buckled and sat in the drivers side before I put the keys in the ignition and started the car. I drove away from the mall as fast as I could. I had The Academy Is...blasting thought out the car eliminating all conversation, which probably was worse because I started to have flashbacks. Flashback of when I introduced Jeff and Tegan it was my fault they got together. It was my fault she got hurt. I got a flashback of the night everything happened. I pulled off the highway and drove off into the shoulder of the road before breaking down.

"Sis?" Tegan asked as she turned off the radio. I could hear the tear in her voice. I turned to see my sisters tear stained face.

"I'm so sorry." I said as I pulled her into a hug. We both hugged each other until she had calmed down. She pulled away from me and smiled before pulling gout her phone. No doubt knowing that I couldn't drive in this condition. I climbed into the back where Vicki was still crying slightly. I got her out of car seat and held her until she stopped and fell asleep. Zacky and Jimmy showed up not even twenty minutes later. Jimmy jumped in the back of the car and wrapped his arms around me and Vicki and rocked us back and forth. I gripped his shoulder with one hand and let the rest of my tear out.

"Come on lets get you home." He said as he pulled away. I nodded and placed Vicki back in her seat and covered her back up with her new blanket.

"She recognized him." I said as I sat down.

"Recognized who?"

"Jeff." I said plain and simple.

"Jeff Todd?" He asked.

"Yeah." I said. Once we were home i jumped out of the car and ran inside.

"Where's Aidyn?" I asked Matt who was sitting on the couch.

"Up stairs with Jocelyn." He said with a confused look. I nodded and walked upstairs and into Matt's room before pulling Aidyn into my arms.

"Thank you for watching him." I said as I walked out of the room and into my own. I laid down on my bed with Aidyn for what felt like hours until we both fell asleep.