With a Kiss

Simone and I were cuddled together on the couch, watching the news. It was a little segment on the Tokio Hotel concert yesterday. So girl, probably 15 or 16, was picked to sing a verse of Scream, and she got to go backstage when the concert was over with Tokio Hotel. They said that Bill had his first one night relationship. I cringed. Simone pulled me into a tighter hug.

"That's not true. Both of us know Bill way better then that." She said. I nodded, fighting back my tears. Every time I heard.....his name.....I fought back the urge to cry.

"Lets go get some sleep, huh? Don't forget, your first doctors appointment is in two days." Simone reminded me.

"Yea...." I sighed.

"What's wrong, hun?" She asked.

"Well, it's just that I have always imagined my first pregnancy having a husband holding my hand when they put the jelly stuff on my stomach. And seeing how many kids we're having." I told her of my fantasy.

"Well, I can tell you this right now; at that size," She pointed to my stomach, "it's almost 100% impossible that you are only carrying one. It has to be twins, or triplets. I wasn't even that big!"

I smiled, knowing she was right. A beeper went off in the kitchen.

"Ah, I see the concert has started." Simone said. We set a beeper that every time a concert started, (for Tokio Hotel) the beeper went off. I smiled again.

"Ok! Enough chit chat! Bed time!" Simone jumped up, causing me to tip over since I was leaning on her.

"Its 8:30..." I pointed out.

"Holy crap! This is way to late for a pregnant woman to be up!" She gasped. I shook my head and looked down, muffling my giggles. Simone gently pulled me up to my feet and brought me upstairs.

I went into mine and....his...old room. Simone went back down stairs.

Just to let every one know, I still don't sleep in my own bed room...I sleep in our bedroom. And every night I went through his left behind clothes. His pictures. I touched his pillow, lightly dragging my fingers on it. I don't sleep on his pillow, and I haven't washed it since he left. Only mine have I washed.

'Morning'

8:10 am...this is what happens when a crazy ex-boyfriend mom helps your pregnant life. Early bed time...no sleeping in. Ger, gur, gir, grrr. How ever you want to spell it. I rolled out of bed, and got a thin, baby blue tee shirt on, and some basket ball/athletic shorts on.

I dragged my feet down the stairs and sat at the kitchen island, with the turning stool chairs attached to the floor. I sighed, and rubbed my tummy. Simone walked in, already showered, hair done, dressed, and with a small coat of make-up.

"Emma! You're up late today. I'll make some breakfast." She smiled.

"Kay..." I put my arms on the counter, folded them, and put my head on them, staring into the dark space. I rested my eyes even though I wasn't tired. I heard the crack of eggs, stirring, sizzle of bacon, frying of scrambled eggs, pouring of probably water, the rip of a banana tearing off the rest of the banana bunch. About one minute of silence. Then a plate was set in front on me, along with a glass. Then a fork and knife.

I lifted my head. The meal seriously looks like something you would see on a cooking show.

"Simone, you are amazing." I said, and started to eat slowly.

"Thank you. love." She drank her coffee and read the newspaper.

"We still have 15 days until Tom visits." I sighed. Simone sprayed out her coffee and coughed. I sat up erect wondering what I said.

"Umm, yea! 15 days! so so so so long! Long time from now." Simone said franticly. I blinked, confused. "Finish your breakfast! You're hungry!" She folded her newspaper, and left the room. I slowly turned my attention back to my food.