Status: Completed
Even Forever Doesn't Seem Like Long Enough
"Do I Look Like I Can Speak French?"
“We’re totally lost,” I stopped dead in my tracks and eyed our surroundings obliviously.
“We’re not lost... We’re just a little,” He paused, “Off track?”
“Meaning that we’re lost,” I interpreted, shoving my hands into my pockets as I continued to search for something that may lead us to our destination.
“Well... Yeah,” Brendon admitted reluctantly, “Do you speak French?”
“Do I look like I can speak French?” I raised my eyebrows at him expectantly as I parked my bum on a nearby wall.
“You could do. If I didn’t know you then you could well be French,” He shrugged, sitting beside me.
“We’re going to miss our appointment aren’t we?” I looked up at him glumly, letting out a sad sigh.
He wrapped his arm around my shoulders, “Don’t worry Ambs, we’ll get there,”
I linked my hands and left them in my lap. Brendon’s arm moved from around my shoulders as he looked at the piece of paper with the information on.
“I’ll be back in two seconds,” He announced randomly before jumping up from his seating position, “Stay here,” With that he jogged across the road, being careful not to get run over, and he ran into a shop.
As he pushed open the door and walked out of sight, I took a deep breath that really didn’t do much for me. My chest shuddered as I tried to inhale so I couldn’t get enough air into my lungs.
That feeling of not being able to breathe was the scariest feeling in the world. I wasn’t afraid of physical inability, but not being able to breathe scared me more than anything- Even more than heights did.
I grasped at my chest as it tightened and then held my head when a pain shot through it.
I knew that being scared would make me want to breathe faster which would cause me to be unable to breathe more and the cycle would continue, but when you’re experiencing something very frightening it’s extremely difficult to calm yourself down.
I leaned forward and rested my forehead on my knees- not that it would’ve helped.
“Amber!” I heard Brendon’s voice from across the street then a few blaring car horns telling me he’d probably just ran in front of speeding traffic.
I didn’t look up but two hands forced me into an upright position when Brendon was close enough to hear my wheezing and my short sharp breaths.
He saw my reddened face, that I was quite sure was almost purple by then, and I was very, very surprised that he didn’t go straight into panic mode.
“Can’t you breathe?” He spoke calmly to which I responded with a shake of my head, “Is something stuck?” I nodded when it seemed like something was actually stuck in my throat, “Heimlich Manoeuvre?” I shook my head, “Amber, can you cough for me?”
I coughed slightly and he rubbed my back, reassuring me I was going to be fine, before I fell into a coughing fit, forcing a large amount of disgusting stuff into my mouth.
And just like that, I could breathe again.
I took a much needed deep breath and place a finger in my mouth, touching what I thought was phlegm. I glanced at my finger and became slightly worried when I saw blood.
Spitting out what was in my mouth into a nearby open bin, I grimaced.
“Are you okay?” Brendon breathed, quite relieved.
Slowly, I nodded, “I think so,”
I lied. Something was wrong and I knew it.
But it wasn’t his burden to bear.
“Are you going to be okay to go bungee jumping still?” He asked concernedly.
“Yeah,” I ignored a sharp pain in my head, “Yeah, I’ll be fine,”
“Are you sure?” He frowned and I nodded, not saying another word as I took his hand, “Okay then. The man in the shop told me where this place is so I know where we’re going now,”
“Lead the way,” I smiled.
He didn’t notice that the smile was fake.
Fifteen Minutes Later
“See, I told you that we’d get here on time,” Brendon said triumphantly as we wandered onto the bridge at the right time.
I cast my eyes up to him and smiled, “I never doubted you for a second,”
He eyed me suspiciously, “Sure...” He spoke slowly.
I chuckled and nudged into him with my shoulder as we walked along the bridge to meet the bungee instructor.
“Bonjour,” The man grinned widely holding out his hand for us to shake. We returned the greeting, shaking his hand in turn.
“Uh, you need me to speak in English, no?” He had to think about his words.
“Please, we’re not so good at French,” I chuckled.
He laughed politely, “Okay- My name is Luc and I am instructor, yes?”
“I’m Amber and this is Brendon,” I introduced, gesturing to us.
“It’s nice to meet you both. So, for this you put on these harnesses, they go around waist,” He gestured to his waist, “I attach these then to cord then you just jump off bridge,” He shrugged and handed us a harness each.
“Thank you,” Brendon and I chorused.
The man nodded with a bright smile and helped us both into our harnesses. Brendon looked extremely uncomfortable at the man’s hands being so close to his hips but Luc was strictly professional.
“Okay, uh, you go together?” He raised his eyebrows questioningly.
Brendon and I nodded simultaneously.
“Yeah, is that okay?”
“Yes, fine, fine,” He waved his hand dismissively and went down to our ankles to attach the bungee cord, “There are no problems with health to worry about, yes?” He glanced up at us.
Brendon sent me a sideways glance as I shook my head.
“No, we’re both healthy,” I smiled down at Luc and he grinned back.
“Good to hear. Okay, that is done; all that is left is to jump off. I’ll just inform you that the uh... How you say ‘ricochet’... Of the cord may be very forceful. There have been cases of whiplash from this but injuries have only occurred when instructors have been careless. But,” He held up his index fingers to emphasise his interjection, “I am very qualified and you are in safe hands,”
I smiled at him, “Well, I trust you Luc, I’m sure we’ll be fine,”
He nodded with a soft smile, “Okay then, whenever you’re ready, stand at the edge and just fall over it- try not to jump- the bungee will do all the rest,”
“Okay, thank you,” Brendon said gratefully. Luc took a few steps back and Brendon looked over at me.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” He frowned.
“Yes, I’m sure,”
“But what if your cancer causes problems?”
“I’ll be fine. Now, I’m going off this bridge and, considering we’re tied together, you’re coming with me whether you like it or not,”
He sighed, “Okay, if you’re sure,”
“I’m sure,” I urged, taking his hand, “Are you ready?”
He nodded, “I think so, are you?”
I glanced down at the drop below us and gulped, “Um... Yeah,”
He chuckled, “Let’s do it,”
And, with that, the two of us slowly let ourselves fall forward.
The feeling of falling was much the same as it was when we skydived, the only differences were that Brendon and I had our arms wrapped around each other and we bounced back.
Luc was right, the bounce back was very strong. It was lucky I had hold of Brendon; otherwise, I was almost sure I would’ve been another case of whiplash.
We bounced a few more times, the adrenaline rush never fading and the stomach turning never getting easier, before the force wasn’t strong enough to keep us bouncing any longer. Luc then helped us get back onto the bridge.
We thanked Luc and he helped us remove our harnesses before we made our way back to the hotel.
“Hey, I think I’m going to go take a shower,” I announced as we got into the room.
“Okay, I’ll make us something to eat,”
“I’m not really very hungry,” I admitted as I took off my coat and threw it on a nearby chair.
“I’ll make something anyway,” He shrugged, placing a light kiss on my lips before heading to the kitchen.
I rolled my eyes and wandered over to the bathroom, closing and locking the door.
I turned on the shower and, as I waited for the water to heat up, I put down the toilet seat and sat down with a sigh.
Feeling an aching pulse in my ankles, I leaned down and pulled my left ankle carefully up to my knee. Pulling up the bottom of my jeans, I bit down on my lip and ran my hand over my skin.
It was bruised and throbbing. I winced as I trailed my fingers over it in an attempt to stop it hurting but it wasn’t working. I figured it was from the bungee jumping.
I was wrong.
But at that moment, I didn't know any better.
I gave up trying to feel better and began to undress after making sure the water was warm. Feeling my chest tighten, I ignored it and stepped under the shower, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. I grimaced when I had to cough again and I coughed up and spat out the same disgusting blood coloured phlegm that I had earlier that day.
I finished up my shower and stepped out, wrapping a towel around myself as I stepped towards the mirror.
I gazed at my reflection in disgust. My skin was pasty, my eyes were no longer bright, the rings around my eyes were dark and I basically just looked awful.
Feeling my chest tighten again, I had to stop myself from crying out in pain. I put my hand to my chest and squeezed my eyes shut. As the pain eased, my eyes relaxed and gradually opened to see the reflection of tear-glazed eyes staring back.
I jumped slightly when I heard a knock on the door.
“Amber, are you okay?” Brendon called through the door.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I spoke back; quite proud of the control I had over my voice.
“Are you sure? You sound upset,” I guess the control wasn’t enough.
“I’m fine, honestly,” I repeated as I glanced at my hands- They were bruised from the grip I'd had on the railings the day before.
“Okay... Um, there’s food out here for you when you’re ready,”
“I think I might just go straight to bed, I’m kind of tired,” I called back as a tear slipped down my cheek.
“Alright then but you’ve got to eat something later, okay?”
“Okay,” I agreed reluctantly before I heard his footprints get quiet as he walked away.
I watched one of my tears fall into the sink and brushed away the remaining ones from my face before I put on clean clothes and made my way out of the bathroom. Avoiding eye contact with Brendon, I wandered into the bedroom and got into bed, letting my eyes fill up again.
The pillow was getting wetter by the second but I didn’t care.
A few seconds later, the bedroom door opened and I felt a presence beside me, lying on top of the covers. I attempted to dry my face but it didn’t do much good. Brendon wrapped his arm around my waist and pressed his body against mine.
He knew that I didn’t want to talk about it so he didn’t ask. He just held me and gave me the comfort I needed.
Because right then, I didn’t need to talk, I wasn’t having an emotional crisis.
Right then, I was just plain scared.
“I’m here for you Ambs,” He whispered, linking his fingers with mine.
“Thanks,” I blubbered back.
But the thing was; I was actually thinking- ‘That’s the problem’.
To Do List1. Buy flowers for mum and help them understand.
2. Have a space hopper race.
3. Swim with dolphins.
4. Hold a charity night.
5. Get drunk & sing loud and out of tune on karaoke.
6. Ride the biggest, fastest, highest rollercoaster
7. Go to the highest point in the city at night to see the lights
8. Sleep under the stars
9. Crowd surf
10. Meet favourite band
11. Sky-dive
12. Plant a tree
13. Go to Italy
14. Jump from a cliff into water
15. Ride in a hot air balloon
16. Put a message in a bottle
17. Learn a song on an instrument
18. Spend the night in a haunted house
19. Go to Paris
20. Bungee jump
Twenty down, five to go.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blinded by the lights
Hold you through forever
Won't let you go
'Cause if you jump
I will jump too
We will fall together
From the building's ledge
Never looking back at what we've done
We'll say it was love
Because I would die for you
On Skyway Avenue
We The Kings- Skyway Avenue
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“We’re not lost... We’re just a little,” He paused, “Off track?”
“Meaning that we’re lost,” I interpreted, shoving my hands into my pockets as I continued to search for something that may lead us to our destination.
“Well... Yeah,” Brendon admitted reluctantly, “Do you speak French?”
“Do I look like I can speak French?” I raised my eyebrows at him expectantly as I parked my bum on a nearby wall.
“You could do. If I didn’t know you then you could well be French,” He shrugged, sitting beside me.
“We’re going to miss our appointment aren’t we?” I looked up at him glumly, letting out a sad sigh.
He wrapped his arm around my shoulders, “Don’t worry Ambs, we’ll get there,”
I linked my hands and left them in my lap. Brendon’s arm moved from around my shoulders as he looked at the piece of paper with the information on.
“I’ll be back in two seconds,” He announced randomly before jumping up from his seating position, “Stay here,” With that he jogged across the road, being careful not to get run over, and he ran into a shop.
As he pushed open the door and walked out of sight, I took a deep breath that really didn’t do much for me. My chest shuddered as I tried to inhale so I couldn’t get enough air into my lungs.
That feeling of not being able to breathe was the scariest feeling in the world. I wasn’t afraid of physical inability, but not being able to breathe scared me more than anything- Even more than heights did.
I grasped at my chest as it tightened and then held my head when a pain shot through it.
I knew that being scared would make me want to breathe faster which would cause me to be unable to breathe more and the cycle would continue, but when you’re experiencing something very frightening it’s extremely difficult to calm yourself down.
I leaned forward and rested my forehead on my knees- not that it would’ve helped.
“Amber!” I heard Brendon’s voice from across the street then a few blaring car horns telling me he’d probably just ran in front of speeding traffic.
I didn’t look up but two hands forced me into an upright position when Brendon was close enough to hear my wheezing and my short sharp breaths.
He saw my reddened face, that I was quite sure was almost purple by then, and I was very, very surprised that he didn’t go straight into panic mode.
“Can’t you breathe?” He spoke calmly to which I responded with a shake of my head, “Is something stuck?” I nodded when it seemed like something was actually stuck in my throat, “Heimlich Manoeuvre?” I shook my head, “Amber, can you cough for me?”
I coughed slightly and he rubbed my back, reassuring me I was going to be fine, before I fell into a coughing fit, forcing a large amount of disgusting stuff into my mouth.
And just like that, I could breathe again.
I took a much needed deep breath and place a finger in my mouth, touching what I thought was phlegm. I glanced at my finger and became slightly worried when I saw blood.
Spitting out what was in my mouth into a nearby open bin, I grimaced.
“Are you okay?” Brendon breathed, quite relieved.
Slowly, I nodded, “I think so,”
I lied. Something was wrong and I knew it.
But it wasn’t his burden to bear.
“Are you going to be okay to go bungee jumping still?” He asked concernedly.
“Yeah,” I ignored a sharp pain in my head, “Yeah, I’ll be fine,”
“Are you sure?” He frowned and I nodded, not saying another word as I took his hand, “Okay then. The man in the shop told me where this place is so I know where we’re going now,”
“Lead the way,” I smiled.
He didn’t notice that the smile was fake.
Fifteen Minutes Later
“See, I told you that we’d get here on time,” Brendon said triumphantly as we wandered onto the bridge at the right time.
I cast my eyes up to him and smiled, “I never doubted you for a second,”
He eyed me suspiciously, “Sure...” He spoke slowly.
I chuckled and nudged into him with my shoulder as we walked along the bridge to meet the bungee instructor.
“Bonjour,” The man grinned widely holding out his hand for us to shake. We returned the greeting, shaking his hand in turn.
“Uh, you need me to speak in English, no?” He had to think about his words.
“Please, we’re not so good at French,” I chuckled.
He laughed politely, “Okay- My name is Luc and I am instructor, yes?”
“I’m Amber and this is Brendon,” I introduced, gesturing to us.
“It’s nice to meet you both. So, for this you put on these harnesses, they go around waist,” He gestured to his waist, “I attach these then to cord then you just jump off bridge,” He shrugged and handed us a harness each.
“Thank you,” Brendon and I chorused.
The man nodded with a bright smile and helped us both into our harnesses. Brendon looked extremely uncomfortable at the man’s hands being so close to his hips but Luc was strictly professional.
“Okay, uh, you go together?” He raised his eyebrows questioningly.
Brendon and I nodded simultaneously.
“Yeah, is that okay?”
“Yes, fine, fine,” He waved his hand dismissively and went down to our ankles to attach the bungee cord, “There are no problems with health to worry about, yes?” He glanced up at us.
Brendon sent me a sideways glance as I shook my head.
“No, we’re both healthy,” I smiled down at Luc and he grinned back.
“Good to hear. Okay, that is done; all that is left is to jump off. I’ll just inform you that the uh... How you say ‘ricochet’... Of the cord may be very forceful. There have been cases of whiplash from this but injuries have only occurred when instructors have been careless. But,” He held up his index fingers to emphasise his interjection, “I am very qualified and you are in safe hands,”
I smiled at him, “Well, I trust you Luc, I’m sure we’ll be fine,”
He nodded with a soft smile, “Okay then, whenever you’re ready, stand at the edge and just fall over it- try not to jump- the bungee will do all the rest,”
“Okay, thank you,” Brendon said gratefully. Luc took a few steps back and Brendon looked over at me.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” He frowned.
“Yes, I’m sure,”
“But what if your cancer causes problems?”
“I’ll be fine. Now, I’m going off this bridge and, considering we’re tied together, you’re coming with me whether you like it or not,”
He sighed, “Okay, if you’re sure,”
“I’m sure,” I urged, taking his hand, “Are you ready?”
He nodded, “I think so, are you?”
I glanced down at the drop below us and gulped, “Um... Yeah,”
He chuckled, “Let’s do it,”
And, with that, the two of us slowly let ourselves fall forward.
The feeling of falling was much the same as it was when we skydived, the only differences were that Brendon and I had our arms wrapped around each other and we bounced back.
Luc was right, the bounce back was very strong. It was lucky I had hold of Brendon; otherwise, I was almost sure I would’ve been another case of whiplash.
We bounced a few more times, the adrenaline rush never fading and the stomach turning never getting easier, before the force wasn’t strong enough to keep us bouncing any longer. Luc then helped us get back onto the bridge.
We thanked Luc and he helped us remove our harnesses before we made our way back to the hotel.
“Hey, I think I’m going to go take a shower,” I announced as we got into the room.
“Okay, I’ll make us something to eat,”
“I’m not really very hungry,” I admitted as I took off my coat and threw it on a nearby chair.
“I’ll make something anyway,” He shrugged, placing a light kiss on my lips before heading to the kitchen.
I rolled my eyes and wandered over to the bathroom, closing and locking the door.
I turned on the shower and, as I waited for the water to heat up, I put down the toilet seat and sat down with a sigh.
Feeling an aching pulse in my ankles, I leaned down and pulled my left ankle carefully up to my knee. Pulling up the bottom of my jeans, I bit down on my lip and ran my hand over my skin.
It was bruised and throbbing. I winced as I trailed my fingers over it in an attempt to stop it hurting but it wasn’t working. I figured it was from the bungee jumping.
I was wrong.
But at that moment, I didn't know any better.
I gave up trying to feel better and began to undress after making sure the water was warm. Feeling my chest tighten, I ignored it and stepped under the shower, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. I grimaced when I had to cough again and I coughed up and spat out the same disgusting blood coloured phlegm that I had earlier that day.
I finished up my shower and stepped out, wrapping a towel around myself as I stepped towards the mirror.
I gazed at my reflection in disgust. My skin was pasty, my eyes were no longer bright, the rings around my eyes were dark and I basically just looked awful.
Feeling my chest tighten again, I had to stop myself from crying out in pain. I put my hand to my chest and squeezed my eyes shut. As the pain eased, my eyes relaxed and gradually opened to see the reflection of tear-glazed eyes staring back.
I jumped slightly when I heard a knock on the door.
“Amber, are you okay?” Brendon called through the door.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I spoke back; quite proud of the control I had over my voice.
“Are you sure? You sound upset,” I guess the control wasn’t enough.
“I’m fine, honestly,” I repeated as I glanced at my hands- They were bruised from the grip I'd had on the railings the day before.
“Okay... Um, there’s food out here for you when you’re ready,”
“I think I might just go straight to bed, I’m kind of tired,” I called back as a tear slipped down my cheek.
“Alright then but you’ve got to eat something later, okay?”
“Okay,” I agreed reluctantly before I heard his footprints get quiet as he walked away.
I watched one of my tears fall into the sink and brushed away the remaining ones from my face before I put on clean clothes and made my way out of the bathroom. Avoiding eye contact with Brendon, I wandered into the bedroom and got into bed, letting my eyes fill up again.
The pillow was getting wetter by the second but I didn’t care.
A few seconds later, the bedroom door opened and I felt a presence beside me, lying on top of the covers. I attempted to dry my face but it didn’t do much good. Brendon wrapped his arm around my waist and pressed his body against mine.
He knew that I didn’t want to talk about it so he didn’t ask. He just held me and gave me the comfort I needed.
Because right then, I didn’t need to talk, I wasn’t having an emotional crisis.
Right then, I was just plain scared.
“I’m here for you Ambs,” He whispered, linking his fingers with mine.
“Thanks,” I blubbered back.
But the thing was; I was actually thinking- ‘That’s the problem’.
To Do List1. Buy flowers for mum and help them understand.
2. Have a space hopper race.
3. Swim with dolphins.
4. Hold a charity night.
5. Get drunk & sing loud and out of tune on karaoke.
6. Ride the biggest, fastest, highest rollercoaster
7. Go to the highest point in the city at night to see the lights
8. Sleep under the stars
9. Crowd surf
10. Meet favourite band
11. Sky-dive
12. Plant a tree
13. Go to Italy
14. Jump from a cliff into water
15. Ride in a hot air balloon
16. Put a message in a bottle
17. Learn a song on an instrument
18. Spend the night in a haunted house
19. Go to Paris
20. Bungee jump
Twenty down, five to go.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blinded by the lights
Hold you through forever
Won't let you go
'Cause if you jump
I will jump too
We will fall together
From the building's ledge
Never looking back at what we've done
We'll say it was love
Because I would die for you
On Skyway Avenue
We The Kings- Skyway Avenue
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
♠ ♠ ♠
I hope you liked it! Thank you all very much for your comments- That would be nice again but don't feel like you have to =)I might be posting the first chapter of the next story I'm going to try out soon, so keep your eye out for that- It'll be a John O'Callaghan story. Anyways, hope you all have a great weekend! =)