You Don't Know A Thing About My Sins

“Hey baby,” I said kneeling down so my face was level with his “You feeling ok?” I asked.

“My head hurts but I’m fine otherwise,” he attempted to laugh but winced as he did.

“Awww, I’ll get you something,” I said standing up but he grabbed my wrist.

“No, no tablets.” He said shaking his head.

“Oh Gerard! Shit, I’m so sorry! I didn’t think!” I rambled.

Way to go Charlie I thought mentally slapping myself.

We went through all that to get him off drugs and here I am hanging him temptation on a plate.

“It’s ok, don’t worry about it,” he reassured me.

Frank got up and told us he was wiped out and was gonna go to bed.

I told Mark to say goodnight to Gerard and go to but he protested and started off a tantrum.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill lil’ dude, how bout I read you a story first?” Frank offered.

Mark gladly accepted and they both disappeared off upstairs.

When they were gone Gerard pulled me into a hug the best he could with the baby bump in the way and we stayed like that for a little while.

“Fuck! What the hell was that?” Gerard asked sitting up.

“The baby kicked,” I smiled at him.

“C-can I….can I feel it?” he asked timidly

“Gerard, it’s your baby too, you don’t have to ask to feel it kicking,” I stated placing his hand where the baby was moving.

We stayed silent just feeling our baby moving, relishing in the moment.

Until Gerard broke the comfortable silence that had befallen us.

“Jesus, this is so surreal…I mean, us here together with a baby on the way. A few months ago I didn’t think this would ever happen….I mean you and me together…..and I never thought we’d be having a baby again so soon after last time,” he stopped at this looking pained.

I place a hand on his soft pale cheeks and he shot me a smile before continuing.

“I didn’t think you’d ever want to have a baby with me again after that,” he said looking at his feet.

I cupped a hand under his chin and gently raised it up making him look me in the eyes.

“That’s funny, I thought the same thing,” I told him.

He kissed me gently and lovingly, and then did something I never thought he’d do

“It is actually mine, right?”