Even If I Say

What was I thinking? How was I gonna tell him this? Why did I do that? I sighed aloud and Harry looked at me. He was walking with me on the moving staircase. We paused for it to change.

“Tell me now…”

“What?” I didn’t want to…

“I don’t want to wait.”

“I’m not ready to tell you…”

“Please, Ara, I need to know.” I looked down and studied my shoe laces.

“We have to go to class. I’ll tell you at lunch, Harry…”

He shot me a worried glance before heading his way to his next class.

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I came out of my fifth class and watched around for Harry. I wanted to see him; I missed him terribly, but I really wasn’t ready to tell him I loved him… I saw him come walking down the hall towards me. I admired him, then speedily walked away. I couldn’t tell him. Not yet.

I walked out to where we were supposed to meet, but a few feet over. I was feeling out of place. What was I supposed to do?

I stood up, then sat back down and looked to see him coming towards the spot. I walked more towards him. It stopped him.

“Ara… you’re acting really strange, what did you need to tell me?”

“I don’t know… I mean, I do. I just don’t know how to tell you. I don’t know if I want to…”

“Ara?” He moved closer to me. No, no, get away. I pushed him back which made him step back a few steps. I pulled him into a hug.

“Ara, this weird… just… tell me. I’m not asking. I’m demanding.” I looked at him. I kind of liked his demanding.

“Harry… It’s just… you’re… I mean I…” I moved closer to him and I could feel his breath on me. I closed my eyes and lingered my mouth around his. I pressed my lips to his gently and pulled away. I looked at him for a second, then grabbed my things and ran. I ran anywhere, anywhere but around him.