What He Doesn't Know

The ward was quiet more or less. Only an infants cry broke the still air and I wondered if that was the little monster that took a month of my life away. I shook my head. It wasn't the kids fault, it was LynZ's and I shouldn't forget it ever. Then why was I here? Its because I'm too fucking nice.

"Lindsay Ballato?" the nurse pointed to a room right behind me. I thanked her and stepped inside. There was LynZ alright. Her stomach was like a mountain and the light green mountain covering her was like grass covering the mountain. I leaned against the door frame and watched her for a minute while her chest rose and fell as she slept. Slowly I made my way over to her bed. Bouquets of flowers and stuffed animals littered her room along with cards and balloons. Too bad I missed the celebrations.

"Gerard?" she opened one tired eye, she looked horrible over all.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" I sat in the empty chair beside her bed. She tilted her head to look at me.

"Like shit." she smiled. I smiled back.

"How are you and Frank doing?"

"Were fine, we finished our Canada tour and our American tour then took a mini vacation back in Toronto... then you called." she sighed.

"Sorry, I just... I don't want to be alone during this." I raised an eyebrow.

"From all the gifts that are here, why did you choose me?" I wanted to know and besides, my fans could hear about it in What He Doesn't Know, it has to have some content. She sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

"No one can know who the father is other wise the band will fall apart and I'll be out of a job." my mouth felt dry. Who was it?

"Looks to me like you're already there, sugar." the comment was meant to be bitter and she winced from it.

"Yeah I think I know that. Thanks for reminding me."

"Who's the father?" it was more of a demand then a question. She bit her lip.

"Jimmy Urine." she sighed.

"Your lead singer?" I asked in disbelief. She nodded sadly. I ran my fingers through my hair.

"I see what you mean."

"He said if I tell anyone that he'll kick me out of the band and replace me like I replaced Vanessa." a tear slipped down her cheek and I felt a pang of sympathy for her.

"So where do I fit into this besides the fact you tried to destroy my life?" she looked over at me again and this time her eyes were pleading.

"Please adopt the baby?" my eyes widened.

"Excuse me? You dragged me back to Jersey to ask you to put that burden on myself again just after I fixed what you started?" I spat. I guess I sounded a bit harsh because she started to cry. "LynZ... please don't cry." I was afraid a nurse would come in. "Okay you know what, I'll find someone to adopt the baby okay? I'll do what I can." why do I do this to myself.

"You... will?" she choked out. I nodded grimly and she smiled.

"Thank you but please don't tell anyone it was Jimmy?" I sighed.

"I promise,"