A Wonderful Caricature of Intimacy; A Tale of Past Lovers

Chapter 47
I didn’t know what had come over me, but I woke up and found myself underneath Pete, making out. I ran my fingers through his hair, moaning so softly as he kissed me so gently and perfectly. The thing is though, I didn’t feel a spark. I didn’t have that connection that I had with Brendon. I opened my eyes and could have sworn I saw Brendon on top of me instead of Pete. I snapped out of it and pushed him off of me.

“Pete, this is wrong. You’re with Ashlee and then there’s Brendon. This is just wrong…” I said as he got off of me and I got up from the couch.

“I know, but… Erelin, I know this is going to sound crazy, but I feel like we’re suppose to be together,” he said as he grabbed my hand.

I sighed and just sort of looked at him weirdly. I really couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Yes, I will admit that I did feel that we were meant to be together, but something was holding me back. I just didn’t know what.

“Erelin?” Pete said looking at me.

“Ok, I’ll admit that I did have a feeling that we were meant for each other, but you’re with Ashlee. I can see you two happy. Brendon and I…. were happy. We are just having minor problems, and hopefully we can work it out,” I said as I got up and went to grab a glass of water and asprin.

I never had a hang over in my life when drinking. For some reason though, I had one. My head and my heart were both hurting. Maybe it was a sign that something might go down.

“Brendon cheated on you though.”

“Yea because of this,” I said pointing at him and me after I grabbed a water bottle for the fridge.

“What do you mean this?” he asked.

“Don’t you realize? We’re the reason why Brendon cheated on me on the first place. Not because of some slut who tried to get into his pants. He got drunk because of our closeness, and he was jealous of it,” I said.

“I realize that, but don’t you realize that we are meant to be?” he asked as he grabbed my hand.

“Don’t you realize that you’re the problem?!” I said, rage rushing to my head as I slammed my closed water bottle on the counter.

He stood there in shock. I think this was the very first time I was ever in a fit of rage in front of him. Actually, Brendon and Pete have never seen me angry before. I could tell he got mad at me for raising my voice at him. I could start to see the vein in his forehead beginning to show.

“What do you mean problem?” He said with attitude towards me.

I sighed and breathed in heavily. I had to calm myself down.

“You’re not the problem. You’re the cure for the ‘problem’

“The cure for it?”

“Yea. My problem is that I’ve wanted everything that you’ve given to her. To be loved, to be dreamt of, to be sought. You’re the cause of why I’m falling for you. We have this weird connection that no one can explain. You wonder why Brendon would get jealous? It was because of our connection. It seemed like to him we were the ones in love, not Brendon and me. Love is like a weird, incurable disease. There is no cure for the cause if the cause is the cure. The only cure they have is the cause. Sometimes you can’t have the cure.”

He stood there in surprise. His mouth slightly opened.

“Whoa…”

“Look, we’ve done enough damage for today, for an entire life time. I don’t this damage is a good kind either. We’ve done and been through too much Pete. I think I over-welcomed my stay. I think I should head back to Chicago,” I said as I head towards my room.

I needed to get out of here. I was making it worse as it is.

“Erelin…”

“No, Pete. I’ve made up my mind.” I said as I watch Pete come towards me.

I walked inside the guest room and locked it. I sighed and walked towards my luggage and pulled out some clean clothes. I grabbed them and the towel on the chair in the room. I opened the door slowly and looked around to not see Pete anywhere. I snuck towards the bathroom, closed and shut it. I stripped down and turned on the shower. I got in and let the hot water soothe my whole body, physically and mentally. After about 15 minutes, I was out of the shower and already dressed. I blew dried my hair, and straightened it. I headed back to my room after I was done and packed up the few stuff that I had taken out of my luggage. I realized that I had left my phone in the living room. I sighed as I opened the door and headed down the hallway towards the living room. I found Pete sitting there on the couch we had fallen asleep upon hours before, staring into outer space. I glanced at him as I walked towards the other couch and picked up my phone.

“Why not?” he said out of nowhere.

“Why not what?” I said as I turned around and faced him.

“Be cured… by me,” he said as he got up and looked me into the eyes.

“Sometimes, you can’t have the cure. Sometimes the cure is someone else. Sometimes that cure is saving someone else you this is in less need of it. So the only other option is to let it die. Cause I can tell you want to save her instead.”

“So you don’t want me to save you? What happens if I want to save you?” he said as he walked towards me.

He put his hands towards my face and started stroking my hair and face.

I stood there and looked into his eyes. For some reason, it didn’t seem right. I couldn’t put my finger on it. I just knew that this wasn’t right at all. I couldn’t see anything in his eyes. “I don’t think you can save me in the end. I can’t have you because she has you. I think she doesn’t need you but that’s my opinion. My only other option is to let it die. I need to stop thinking about you saving me because I know you don’t feel the same way,” I said as I took a step back.

“But what if I do?” he said as he took a step towards me.

“Pete, I can tell in your eyes. Don’t think I’m stupid. I don’t see what I see when I look in Brendon’s eyes. And I’m pretty sure you don’t see what you see when you look into Ashlee’s,” I said.

He stood there in silence, just staring at me. It seemed like he was trying hard to see if things could change, but he knew deep down I was telling the truth. I gave a weak smile and walked around him to the guest room. I turned on my phone to find many missed calls and text messages that I would just check later. I called a taxi service to come pick me up. I packed some last minute stuff and not even 10 minutes later, I got a phone call saying that the taxi was outside. I grabbed my stuff and headed towards the front room by the front door. Pete was standing in the dining room now, which was near the front door. I smiled at him as I put down my stuff for a second. I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“I need to find someone else to cure me. You might have been able to, but I know deep down that you want to cure Ashlee instead,” I said.

“Who ever cures you is very lucky,” Pete said as we let go of each other.

“One day…” I said with a soft smile.

I walked over to my stuff and picked it up. I headed towards the front door and opened it. I stopped as I was about to walk through the door way. I turned around to see Pete watch me walk away. I smiled at him.

“Thank you for everything,” I said, meaning every single word.

“You’re welcome,” he said with a wink.

“Bye,” I said with a smile.

“Bye,” he softly said.

With that, I walked out of the house and closed the door behind me.