Angry. - Comments

I think anyone that's ever called someone out on their joke actually being offensive or hurtful feels you there.

@ Join the Masquerade
Yeah, but telling them as much just elicits the standard "stop being so sensitive" response, or a rant about how "political correctness is destroying freedom of speech." *shrug*

I think it's just that... things like that are so "normal" in today's society that when you call people out on it, they don't get it straight away that what they're joking about actually does have consequences on minority groups because to them it literally is "just a joke". So I understand that side of it, because it's hard to realise you're doing something wrong with it's widely accepted by society and hard to agree with it when it means calling yourself a bad person... but then if they're not told these things, nothing changes.

@ Proud Saiyan Warrior
You don't know my family. That would not work. All it would do is make them push back harder. Besides, it's not a matter of my family being unintelligent, by any means. They just...seem to find joy in expressing their opinions by bashing other opinions and I'm not about that.

I went thru what you're going thru.
I eventually told them I was smarter than them and the fact that my youth had any bearing on that in their minds proved it. Needless to say, my family does not test me anymore.

@ Join the Masquerade
I can't bring myself to do that because inevitably people will kind of gang up on me and I just can't deal with it. Which makes me feel weak and stupid but it's so awful for my anxiety.

I'm not looking to change minds. I just wish people would stop posting things that blatantly ridicule others' beliefs. Like, I straight up told my mom (about the post she shared yesterday) that I was disappointed that she would share something where someone's sexual orientation was a punch line. She responded with "It's just a joke. Nothing more." I wanted to tell her it was a joke that wasn't funny and that this kind of microagression wherein LGBT peoples' identities become punch lines contributes to an overall standard in society where broader aggression against LGBT people is accepted and normalized and causing suicide attempts at astronomical rates among LGBT people, especially youth.

But I figured if me talking to her about this shit--and her even being the only member of my family I'm out to--isn't enough to keep her from thinking that kind of "joke" is funny, nothing I say about why this matters to me will. I don't care if she wants to continue supporting gun rights. I don't like that she's ridiculing things she knows I care about to do so. And my whole family does it and it's just frustrating. But I can't bring myself to say anything.

Tricky situation. I understand what you mean when you say you feel you aren't standing up for yourself and such. I guess I tend to be happier doing that and ignoring what family and work colleagues and such have to say about things that bother me and countering the awful feeling of letting them get away with it by posting my own things separate from theirs stating my opinion, sometimes in different places. Not everyone is willing to change their opinions.

@ Join the Masquerade
I've thought about that. But one, it makes me feel like a coward--it goes back to the whole "not being willing to stand up for myself in favor of avoiding conflict" thing that I'm starting to hate about myself. And two, while I'd be comfortable doing that with my brother, my mom and dad still post things about their lives that I care about and I don't want to block them entirely.

I know there's an "I don't want to see this" feature for individual posts but I don't know how it works and I don't want to flag one post as something I don't want to see and have Facebook use its algorithms to determine I don't want to see other posts that I might actually want to see, you know?

Part of my frustration also stems from the fact that these days some of the people posting this crap are people who used to be my confidants at one point. And now I feel like I can't trust them not to judge or ridicule me because I feel like my frustrations and beliefs and feelings are irrelevant to them.

I dunno. Like I said, maybe I'm overreacting. The whole situation is just frustrating. And I can't SAY anything about it to the people who are doing it without getting bitched at more.

I have some family on facebook that I find hard to deal with. Did you know you can block seeing posts from them? You could try that :)