I Think I Need Help. - Comments

@ spencer hastings.
of course! i am so glad that my words could bring you some comfort. sometimes it is easier to speak with people you don't actually know than it is to talk to those from your real life. i truly hope that you have found whatever it is you were needing - the help, happiness and peace. <3

@ adam driver.
@ Blood Eagle

I meant to respond way sooner to both of you but was really not doing well for a while. I was having a hard time responding to people on social media. But I'm definitely doing a bit better now and I really wanted to let you both know how much your words mean to me. I have read both of your replies so many times the past couple of months. It means a lot that you were both so honest and open and kind. I hope that you're doing well.

take it from me, being depressed and stupid are two different things
it's easier to flippantly call yourself stupid -- i do that all the time, but that's not really what it is
don't throw yourself into college if you're not ready. ultimately why are you going to college? for a better life, to be happy, right? well, try to be okay emotionally first. as good as you can. because college is hard and it's impossible to handle that stress if you're depressed. i've really fucked myself over by forcing myself into something i wasn't ready for because i was so depressed. having a degree and career isn't the be all and end all and it's not going to make you happy or fulfilled. you have to find that peace within, and you should aim to do that before putting yourself under so much pressure. and don't let anyone else make you feel bad about it, either, do what you need to do for yourself. this is your life and you deserve to be happy; to fell like you can breathe. im sorry for giving unwarranted advice, i know it's dumb, but you really shouldn't feel the need to put so much pressure on yourself, just try to be okay.

you are not stupid. not even close. you are brave for being about to talk so openly about your thoughts and emotions. it isn’t easy. i struggle with it. i’ve always been the kind of person to hold everything in and never talk to anyone about what’s really going on inside of my head. but then i unleash over the smallest, silliest thing. there’s nothing wrong with asking for help either. sometimes we all have to. you should call your insurance and ask them about therapists/counseling, etc. they’ll be able to point you in the direction of someone that takes your insurance and what they’ll cover. i understand being nervous about school. i’m not good at math either. it was my biggest struggle in junior high/high school. it will always be my struggle. it is the only class i have left at university. i’ve taken a break since 2015 because i’ve taken the same class twice now. and just can’t get past it. i’m also considering going back to therapy. i’m adopted and have struggled with that for years. my biological mother passed away last month and we weren’t on speaking terms. it’s rough. it’ll probably be rough for a while but i’ll get through it. and you will too, love! please message me if you ever need to talk to someone. <3